The Old Hunting Grounds (detail) by Thomas Worthington…

6 Books That Changed My Life

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“A book must be the axe for the frozen sea within us.”

― Franz Kafka

Books inspire me and have always been my refuge to conflicts in life. Here are the 6 books that challenged my perspectives and wiped of my stringent notions.

1. The Road Less Travelled by Scott Peck

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Simply, buy this book for the path towards enlightenment in a spiritual way that encapsulates your personal growth. This book never gives you easy solutions to the conflicts, it simply says; “Legitimate suffering is part of life” and leaves you with better insights to lead a fulfilled life.

Profound wisdom in a nutshell

–       If you are not part of the solution, then you are part of the problem

–       Route to reality is not easy

–       Desire to love is not love – Love is both an intention and action

–       We cannot be source of strength unless we nurture our strength

–       My feeling of love may be unbounded, but my capacity to be loving is limited

–       An attempt to avoid legitimate suffering is the root cause of emotional illness

–       When I genuinely love I am extending myself, and when I am extending myself I am growing. Genuine love is self-replenishing. The more I nurture the spiritual growth of others, the more my own spiritual growth is nurtured. I am a totally selfish human being. I never do something for somebody else but that I do it for myself.

–       Individual growth and societal growth are interdependent

2. The Go-Giver by Bob Burg and John David Mann

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I didn’t even expect that such a small book could make a huge difference in my approach towards life. It simply says, “Give” and go on explaining 5 profound laws that directs the mankind and concludes that there is always a truth in the opposite.

Profound wisdom in a nutshell

–       What you focus is what you get

–       Giving leads to receiving

–       World is just a reflection of you

–       Your true worth is determined by how much more you give in value than you take in payment

–       If you want more success, find a way to serve more people; it is just that simple

–       Your income is determined by how many people you serve and how well you serve them

–       Your influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interest first

–       The point is not what you do. Not what you accomplish. It’s who you are.

3. Tao Te ching by Lao tzu

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Tao Te Ching is one of the finest books on philosophy written by Lao Tzu, a Chinese philosopher and a Poet. It’s profound, intriguing and soul stirring. Read it and get in touch with the enlightening insights that give you enough thrills to pursue your life vigorously.

Profound wisdom in a nutshell

–       Rid yourself of desires to know the secrets

–       Adapt the nothing; because change is permanent

–       By virtue of nothing, you gain something

–       Way is vague and unclear; but still you have to follow; substance will be found – not to worry.

–       He who brags will have no merit; he who boasts will not endure

–       Good man is the teacher the bad learns form; and the bad man is the material the good works on.

–       Whoever lays hold of empire will lose it.

–       Anything that goes against the way will come to an end.

–       A man of highest virtue does not keep to virtue and that is why he has virtue

–       A man of the lowest virtue never strays from virtue and that is why he is without virtue.

–       Excessive meanness leads to great expense

–       Too much store is sure to end in immense loss

–       There is no crime greater than having too many desires

–       There is no misfortune greater than being covetous

–       Never attempt to be great, that is the only way in becoming great

–       Keep a thing in order before disorder sets in

–       One who excels in fighting is never roused by anger

–       One who excels in employing others humbles himself before them.

4. The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg

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I never knew habits play such an important role in shaping our future until I read this book. It simply says, you are what your habits are, and also suggests the proven techniques to generate new habits that alter our lifestyle and eventually our life. A must read for everyone to understand the intricacies of the habits.

Profound wisdom in a nutshell

–       Brain converts sequence of action into an automatic routine

–       Cue-routine-reward; Habit loop

–       Brain makes almost any routine into a habit

–       The problem is that brain can’t tell the difference between good and bad habits

–       Since we often don’t recognize these habit loops as they grow, we are blind to our ability to control them.

–       The brain can be reprogrammed; you just have to be deliberate about it.

–       If you want to change the habit, you must find an alternative routine

–       If you genuinely believe in people that they have what it takes to succeed, they will prove you right

–       If you dress a new something in old habits, it’s easier for the public to accept it

–       To market a new habit – make it familiar

–       Every habit, no matter how complex is malleable

–       Habits can be changed; if you understand how can they function

5. The power of myth by Joseph Campbell

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Myths – clues to the spiritual potentialities of human life; this was a revelation

The Power of Myth is a book based on the conversations between mythologist Joseph Campbell and journalist Bill Moyers. Believe me, it is such an astounding book that gives you a thorough understanding of the intriguing elements of life such as life, death, love, marriage etc. and leaves you spellbound.

Profound wisdom in a nutshell

–       Man should not submit to the powers from outside but command them

–       Myth is a manifestation of symbolic energy

–       The dream is an inexhaustible source of spiritual information about yourself

–       Myth is the public dream, dream is the private myth

–       The mystery of life is beyond all human conception

–       World is based on duality

–       Eternity isn’t even a long time. Eternity has nothing to do with time. Eternity is here – if you don’t get it here, you can’t get it anywhere

–       Myths must be kept alive and the people who can keep them are artists

–       Nature echoes in you, because you are nature

–       Our true reality is in our identity and unity with all life

–       A hero is someone who has given his or her life to something bigger than oneself

–       When we quit thinking primarily about our own self-preservation and ourselves. We undergo a truly heroic transformation of consciousness.

–       Desire is the bait, death is the hook

–       Follow your bliss – Find where it is, don’t be afraid to follow it

–       The passage to fulfillment lies between the perils of desire and fear.

–       Your life is the fruit of your own doing

–       The greater life’s pain, the greater life’s reply

–       The demon that you can swallow gives you its power.

–       The images of myth are reflections of the spiritual potentialities of every one of us. Through contemplating these, we evoke their powers in our own lives.

–       If my guiding divinity is brutal; my decisions will be brutal as well

–       By expansion, your ego diminishes, your conscious expands

6. The science of getting rich by Wallace. D. Wattles

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I have my own misconceptions of getting rich till I read this book. All were cleared off and made a huge difference in my life after knowing some of the secrets mentioned in this book. Read it, for it teaches you to become rich, not instantaneously but strategically.

Profound wisdom in a nutshell

–       Moral and spiritual greatness is possible only to those who are above the competitive battle for existence.

–       The very best thing you can do for the whole world is to make the most of yourself

–       People must be taught to become rich by creation, not competition

–       Never ever compel your will on others

–       You must know what you want, and be specific and definite

–       Grateful mind is constantly fixed upon the best, therefore it tends to become the best

–       Getting rich is not the result of doing certain things; it is the result of doing things in a certain way.

–       An ounce of doing things is worth a pound of theorizing.

–       Give everyone more in use value than you take from him in cash value. Then you are adding to the life of the world by every business transaction.

–       If you are in a business which does beat people, get out of it at once

–       You can only get what is yours by giving the other person what is rightfully his.

–       Do not wait for a change of environment, before you act. Create a change of environment by your action

–       Be the best in things you do, then you will accomplish the best. In turn you will be the best.

Note: The Points mentioned here are just the bits of insights I gained from the above books and I’m sure you would find much more insights. Go ahead and grab them, you will never regret.

Featured photo credit: book via pixabay.com

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10 So-called Personality Flaws That Will Make You Highly Successful

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Do people call you eccentric or different?

Maybe they get angry with some of the things that you do. Maybe they don’t agree with them. You begin to question yourself and wonder if there’s something wrong with you.

But many great people in history have had so called “flaws” that have actually sky-rocketed them to success. Perhaps you might identify with some of these.

1. You get obsessed with things easily

Obsession can be dangerous if left unchecked. It’s great to love something, but when you begin to lose sleep, relationships, and your health to it, that’s an issue.

But obsession with something can also be a powerful force. Nobody ever achieved something by “kind of liking” it. They believed in it with all their heart. They knew that if anybody was going to make it happen, it had to be them.

And so you to are obsessed with something. Perhaps it’s music, writing, a hobby, a passion, but that obsession will drive you to success.

2. You rely on other people for support in your goals

There is a large movement in society today to be an individual. Yes, it’s great to “be yourself” and chart your own path. But that doesn’t mean you don’t need the help of others to get there.

Getting to the top is great, but what if nobody is there to celebrate with you when you finally get there?

It’d be a very lonely place.

Every single great person, from Martin Luther King Jr. to Richard Branson, needed and accepted help. And you doing the same is a great thing. You propel yourself to success but you understand others will help you get there.

You don’t default to them and assume that they will do everything for you, but you let them give you some speed – whether that’s as a business contact, an intimate relationship, or otherwise, you understand people can and are necessary to help you.

3. You are stubborn and refuse to quit. You are OK with failing . . . a lot.

Unsuccessful people hit a road bump or fail and give up. Successful people keep failing and keep going, because they know it leads to the reward at the end. About inventing the lighbulb, Thomas Edison is famous for saying, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

So go ahead – be stubborn. Keep trying until you get what you want.

“But you failed, doesn’t that hurt?” people ask.

“Nope,” you respond. “It just means I need to try something else.”

4. You may have introverted tendencies

In Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, Susan Cain talks about how society is extravert focused – big open offices for working, bars for meeting people. These are all great for extroverts to shine, but not introverts.

And so when an introverted person needs time alone to work, or is quiet and listens in a conversation compared to being a chatterbox, or prefers reading a book at home to going out, they are thought of as weird, depressed, or anti-social.

Or, maybe after they go to a party and then need time to re-charge (as socializing, talking, and the outside world is a HUGE drain on introverts), they decline social invites and their friends get mad at them.

There is nothing wrong with being an introvert, and some amazing people belong to that category. Abraham Lincoln, Bill Gates, and Albert Einstein are just a few (see more here).

So go ahead – read that book. Just make sure to get some outside air once in a while. Introverts thrive in extroverted environments sometimes BETTER than extroverts at times, if they’ve had time to recharge in their own world.

5. You follow a different path, and care less about what people think

Society pushes you to follow a specific path – elementary/high school, university, 9-5 job, marriage, 2.5 kids, work 40+ years, retire around 65, live until somewhere in the 70+ range and then pass on.

You see people posting to Facebook, Twitter, etc. for validation. You think, “What’s the point? Why do I need to constantly tell people what I’m doing?”

And you don’t agree. You want to go become a monk for 3 months. You want to just scrape by in terms of salary and travel the world. You don’t want to ever get married.

Good. Carve your own path, and don’t listen to anyone else. There’s only one person you can make 100% happy 100% of the time:

You.

Nobody great ever became great by doing exactly what others did.

6. You put yourself and your time first in a manner some might call selfish or weird

Continuing on from the above, the actions you take may make people think you are a bit strange – not going out all the time, not getting a specific job, not taking the swankiest apartment, saying no to helping a billion people so you have time to yourself.

The most valuable asset you have is not your money, but your time. Time is gone once it passes, so go ahead, be selfish. If someone is not deserving of your time and energy, leave. If something is not deserving of the time either, don’t do it.

Be ruthless.

7. You are OK with making others angry, sad, or unhappy with you

And so as you follow a different path and put yourself first, people become upset with you. Maybe you make your Mom sad by not being at home as much as you travel the world. Maybe you leave a relationship behind to continue a business. Maybe you hold your boundaries on a deal you agreed upon with a business partner and demand terms be met.

Well keep going.

You don’t intentionally want to make people unhappy, you just hold your personal boundaries and know there’s nothing you can do to force people to feel great about your choices. And you are OK and accepting of this.

8. You see the positive in everything and shirk most of the negative (or aren’t as affected by it)

Assuming everything is OK when things need to be taken care of is unhealthy.

For example, not having a place to live and running out of money living in hotels and saying, “Oh I believe it will come to me if I just think of good things” is ludicrous. It’s the same as not having a job and needing an income. Or, being single but wanting to date.

However, what is healthy is to focus on all the opportunities and positivity that is out there:

“I don’t have a place to live, but I can put time into finding one, and I have money to support myself for now.”

“There are tons of places to look for jobs. I’m qualified and highly educated, so if I send out some CVs and ask some of my contacts I’m sure I can find something.”

“There are hundreds of people around me every day, I should try talking to them. Or, I can sign up for online dating services. There’s lots of people out there looking for someone just like I am!”

If all you think are negative thoughts, all you get are negative emotions. Successful people process challenging or negative situations and may get sad or angry, but are quick to turn the situation into a positive and take affirmative action.

Some say you should be chained down by misery and problems. You say you should take decisive action but continue to enjoy life. You understand that it’s worth learning how to be happier.

9. You over-prepare a tiny bit

On a trip, you bring medicine just in case. For a business proposal, you have an alternative idea or budget in case your boss shoots it down. If the restaurant is closed, you know of another one nearby.

You might be a bit anxious, and you’re OK with thinking on your feet. But you prefer planning in advance to deal with possible situations.

People say you over-complicate a bit, and sometimes this is true. But most of the time you have the last laugh when things go over smoothly because you had the foresight to plan. And foresight, is the name of the game when it come to success.

10. You move slower than everyone else

People rush to get a billion things done in a day: see 50 travel sites, talk to as many people as they can, go to 10 parties.

You don’t understand this.

Not only does moving slower allow you to do things better, but you enjoy life more and aren’t running around with high blood pressure all the time.

You accept you can only do a finite number of things during the day, talk to a certain amount of people, and do a certain amount of stuff and work to the best of your ability to accomplish these goals.

You believe in quality over quantity, and it shows in the rich fabric you weave in the story that is your life.

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