How Social Niceties Can Ruin Your Chances Of Getting A Promotion At Work

It’s evaluation time at work again!

And you’re thinking and hoping that this will finally be the time where you get a glowing review for all your hard work.

I mean, who doesn’t want to be a rock star at work? Imagine feeling fulfilled and accomplished in your job, being loved by your boss, respected and admired by your peers and paid the salary you are worth.

Well, those things aren’t impossible.

You know that you can crush it at work and prove to be a valuable asset. You just need the chance to show them.

Sure, kicking ass and creating a name at work require commitment and a good attitude. But, more importantly, it’s achieving success on the right projects, having opportunities to show your skills and cultivating harmonious relationships that can facilitate long-term success.

If you’re playing by all the rules and still not getting any promotion at work, then you might be unknowingly sabotaging yourself. You may think that the following common ‘social graces’ can make you look good but, in reality, they don’t.

Here’s why and how.

Not taking a compliment

If someone says “Great work on that last project!” and your response is anything less than “Thanks, it was a lot of work, but the result was well worth it”, then you’re self-deprecating.

We commonly respond with humility. However, what it actually does is devalue the other person’s opinion of what we accomplished.

If we don’t celebrate our successes or we attribute them to pure luck, then how can we expect our bosses to respect and acknowledge our talents and skills?

Obviously, they’ll think that we are just really lucky and not worthy of a raise or to be given more responsibility. Especially since our luck will probably run out soon right? With that logic, can you seriously blame your boss?

Promoting your success doesn’t make you a jerk it. It just makes you honest. Call a spade a spade. You don’t have to peacock and tell everyone in the office how awesome you are.

And if you would praise your coworker for a job well done, why wouldn’t you praise yourself?

Carrying the world on your back

A project deadline gets missed and you, being the martyr, take full responsibility for the delay.

Falling on your sword and taking the blame for the failure, unfortunately, won’t earn you brownie points with the boss. If there is a problem, it’s important to be honest about the situation. State the issues clearly and concisely.

It could be that the project scope was larger than anticipated or the time required for the other teams to complete their milestones was underestimated. Or it could be that the subject matter required a longer learning curve. Whatever the reasons are for the delay, be honest about them.

Sure, all of those boil down to bad estimations, but no one was asking you to bear the full blame. They only wanted to know the reasons so that they can be avoided in the future.

Carrying the world on your back and blaming yourself is counter-productive to solving or avoiding any issue. And this doesn’t mean that you are dodging accountability. You are simply highlighting the facts in a productive way to resolve or prevent the problem from reoccurring.

Needing the opinion of everyone in making a decision

Great employees are able to anticipate their manager’s needs or concerns and can make some quick decisive actions without supervision when the time requires it. If you are unwilling or unable to make decisions without your manager’s or everyone’s input, then you won’t be able to prove you have the chops to be a leader or manage valuable projects.

Sure, getting input is important, especially in making decisions. But, needing to get every single person’s opinion sounds like you don’t trust your own judgment.

No one is saying that you play CEO or spend the company money like your own, but low profile decisions within the parameters of your job is a great place to start. If your gut says yes and the data are backing it up, then you are golden. You can even bring the options to your manager, tell them your chosen solution and have them decide the solution.

Anything is better than simply reporting the problem for your manager to fix.

Constantly apologizing for ourselves

There are a handful of disastrous lines that women employ during conversations. Mika Brzezinski shares a couple of examples in her book “Knowing Your Value: Women, Money And Getting What You’re Worth“.

It includes:

“I’m sorry if my timing is bad.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I know you’re busy, but…”

“I hate to do this, but…”

When we say these things, we minimize ourselves and our worth. These lines technically translate to: “Please give us whatever is left of your attention, because we know we aren’t as important as your real work.”

You don’t have to barge in and demand folks to stop what they are doing to talk to you. Using phrases like ‘Are you available?’ or ‘Is now a good time’ is a perfectly acceptable way to get your boss’ or peer’s attention without devaluing yourself or your message.

If you don’t value yourself, why should anyone else?

Thinking relationship building isn’t a part of your job

social networking

I’ll admit it. I hate social networking.

My husband regularly tells me to change my profile pic, respond to comments made on pictures he tagged me in or asks me if I’ve heard what happened to so and so.
I don’t do those things not because I’m an introvert or antisocial, but because I have a million and one other things I need to finish. I think those are just unproductive ways to spend my limited time.

And if you have been working so hard through your lunch hour, coming in early and staying late to impress the bosses, you know what I’m talking about.

Unfortunately, working so hard that we forget to build relationships is a big mistake.

Like it or not, we live in a world where social networking is no longer a can-do, but a must-do, especially if you want to be an influencer or to make it into the inner circle. If people never get a chance to know you, then how can you get a promotion at work?

See Also: Job Seekers: Boost Your Appeal Through Social Media Accounts!

Avoiding ‘picking a side’

office politics

No one loves confrontation, especially when it comes to caustic workplace dramas.

In terms of company decisions, however, trying to not to pick a side and give your opinion won’t do you any favors. Your teammates won’t be able to hear your thoughts on the issue or see how you’ll be able to provide value.

Your opinion on a course of action and your reasons for it can only be expressed by you. That’s where you leave your mark and let folks know that not only can you analyze an issue, but you can recommend a solution as well.

Someone who offers a solution – good or bad- to try and fix a problem is always better than someone who just sits there looking at the problem and doing nothing.

Thinking they couldn’t function before you

We want to prove ourselves- desperately.

But, in our pursuit to show we are the best, we have to be careful not to fall into the trap of joining the bandwagon that criticizes the company’s current policies, standards and employees.

You’ll find a lot of people who spend all their time complaining about how the system or process is retarded or how the project management team holds no true function. If you’re caught in such a scene, change the topic or just stop talking to them altogether to maintain your own sanity.

Folks are likely to have been doing the job, succeeding and making money long before you came. So, take it easy on criticisms until you have learned the environment and why the company does something the way they do.

Then, when you voice any recommended changes to your boss and team, you can do it from a place of understanding and knowledge. Remember that change takes time. If they choose not to listen, always continue following commands.

Say the serenity prayer with me:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
Wisdom to know the difference;

And self-control to keep it to myself 🙂

Okay, I added the last part, but you get the idea.

Smiling and nodding

Unfortunately, I’ve unconsciously done this too many times than I can count.

It is a technique we often use to ‘appear’ smart or knowledgeable to our peers and in our attempt to continue the conversation and not point out our deficiencies. Say, for example, someone asks if you are familiar with a process, tool or product. To avoid being embarrassed for not knowing, you smile and nod and make a mental note to google it when you are back at your desk later.

The only problem is, folks can smell the BS from a mile away – like when you mistakenly nodded in agreement when they asked you a question.

If you don’t know what that product or technology is, just say that you aren’t familiar with it or haven’t worked with it before. If you aren’t sure, then say you aren’t sure but you’ll be happy to get clarification.

There is nothing wrong with seeking knowledge and learning from a position of strength.

The fear you have of appearing as the weak link can only come true if you waste time and mess something up that you said you’re skilled at- when you really aren’t.

Everyone wants to make the best decision that will provide an optimal solution. To do that, you have to weigh the pros and cons and look at the problem from every angle. You must be able to anticipate roadblocks.

Take note that overthinking to the point of paralysis can also make us look indecisive.

Have you heard of the jack story?

A man got a flat tire on the side of the road and he saw a house at the top of the hill. He decided to ask the homeowners if they have a jack he can borrow. On his hike up to the house, he thought to himself, what if they don’t have a jack? What if they have a jack and wants to charge him to use it? What if they want to charge $600? He didn’t have that kind of money!

As he made his way up the hill, he continued to get inside his own head. By the time he got to the house, rung the doorbell and someone answered the door, he yelled “Keep your stupid jack!” and stormed back down the hill.

Being able to make educated decisions quickly when stakes are high is a quality of a good leader.

Our instinct to overthink makes us appear as ineffective worriers. They make us look incapable of making tough calls, taking risks and achieving success.

Always remember that done is usually better than perfect, so get started! Besides, most folks can’t tell the difference between 90% and 100%.

Get noticed now

Now that you’ve seen some of the damaging common social niceties, do you see any that you routinely fall for?

Trying to prove your value to folks is hard enough and walking around unknowingly sabotaging yourself just makes it worse. With these ideas, you’ll able to find out how you’re ruining your chances of getting that promotion at work.

So, pick one or two to start with and spend the day changing your habit. You can do this!

Get noticed today for the strong, confident and capable employee that you are!

See Also: How To Get a Promotion Without Working Yourself To The Bone

 

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5 Tips to Stop Wasting Money on Substandard Services When Outsourcing

Outsourcing jobs is a great way to solve problems at work. It can help you deal with heavy work overload, time sensitive deadlines, lack of work competence or having inadequate workforce at a given time.

However, it is still not as ideal as it sounds, especially with all its potential risks. This includes hiring incompetent freelancers or competent freelancers that overcharge their services.

It is in your best interest to avoid both of these scenarios and the following article will help you do so. Here we will provide four tips on how to avoid wasting money on substandard services when outsourcing jobs.

Plan for what is needed

outsourcing plan

The best way to avoid unnecessary expenses is to have a well-laid-out plan for your freelancers. The more specific you are, the better.

First of all, the people you collaborate with are not mind readers. Since you communicate via emails, it’s easy for a project to lose its track due to the lack of necessary information.

Moreover, if you fail to provide detailed information, you risk getting a project that meets your demands but lacks in quality. So, give them online samples of the level of quality you expect to see. Try to be specific about what you do not want to see.

This way, you will be fully covered when asking for a refund if the demands are not met. Moreover, freelancers who lack the competence to meet those demands will back off.

Ask for previous work samples

When you are hiring someone, it is imperative that you go over their portfolio.

Unfortunately, it can be difficult to tell from someone’s portfolio if he can fill in your specific task. So, for that reason, it would be best to ask freelancers if they have a previous work sample of something that is similar to what you are going to ask for.

Maintain communication

maintain communication

Once you select your freelancers and award them the project, it is important that you maintain communication. As we said, you are not sharing the same working space.

If the project is delicate, it would be wise to organize a Skype call. You can also ask to receive screenshots of how your project is going. This way, you can correct any inconsistencies immediately. You’ll be able to see in advance if you have made the right call, too.

Get a referral or test potential candidates

Lastly, if you are not sure in the expertise of your potential candidates, you can test them out. You can also ask for referrals from other trusted users in the same niche as you. You can do the testing if you are down to two or three potential candidates so it won’t cost you a lot.

Focus on these traits

If you want a reliable outsourcing partner, then you need to have a clear list of their purpose. If they can meet these standards, you can count on them.

> Positive results – The Company can help you increase your customer satisfaction and decrease production costs within the desired time frame.

> Compatibility – The Company should share common goals and values as your company. They need to be performance centric, care about their clients and community and use same methods for managing the company.

> Innovative – You need a company that can greatly contribute to your business and that can perform on their own without the constant need for monitoring. They should help you modernize your business regarding technology, equipment, etc.

See Also: How Cloud Technology Can Help Your Business Grow

> Flexibility – You need a company that can adapt to your standards and provide you with a personalized service to meet your demands. They need to consider your needs as a priority and you need to adequately reward them for their devotion.

> Adaptable management – You need a company that can respond quickly and adapt to changes without sacrificing the quality of the end results. In other words, it needs to have a reliable management team as well as competent staff.

> Benchmarking – You are going to know the outsourcing solution is reliable if they can provide you with evidence explaining that you are receiving a high-quality service. They need to create new growth potential and offer measurable success in the field of employee and client satisfaction.

> Resourceful – They need to continuously deliver in-depth content that is innovative and that fits your needs and demands.

> Constant quality improvement – With continuous collaboration, the quality and the performance of your outsourcing solution should improve. Basically, you need a company that can keep up with you. They need to work on their own staff and provide new and comprehensive training courses for their employees in order to achieve these results.

Conclusion

We hope you will end up with an outsourcing agency or freelancer you can trust and collaborate on numerous other projects in the future. Once you find a competent outsourcing company, it will be far easier to handle projects in the future.

See Also: A Practical Guide to Hiring and Managing Freelancers

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The Importance Of Emotional Intelligence For A Leader

Leadership is a people business.

If you weren’t working with other people, you wouldn’t be a leader. You’d just be some crazed shouty guy on his own in a badly-lit office.

And, without a personality yourself, you would just be an app. You would just be regulating the flow of work, like an algorithm unable to bend or adapt to the human values around you.

At the heart of what makes us human is our emotions. We can concede that as a human with a personality and a workforce, you are technically a leader. But, if you don’t understand or can’t work with your emotions and those of your colleagues, then you’re not going to be a very effective one.

There is a name for that crucial faculty for understanding emotions and that is emotional intelligence or EQ for short. Everybody has at least an ounce of it. Some just have a different type than others. For the greatest leaders, it is as vital as water or air.

So what are the constituents of EQ?

There are three factors that add up to create your emotional intelligence. They are:

Perceiving and understanding emotions. This is the basic ability to tell one emotion from another and their intensity in yourself and in others.
Managing emotions. This is about keeping your emotions under control and the ability to consciously affect the emotions of your colleagues.
Utilizing emotions. This is next level stuff. It is your ability to harness emotions and drive them towards helping you or your employees towards accomplishing tasks.

If these seem like unattainable superpowers to you, it’s time to start taking some specific steps to develop your abilities and learn what makes emotional intelligence for leaders.

How to assess your EQ

Figuring out your strengths and weaknesses can help you to identify which elements of your emotional intelligence need some work.

Emotional intelligence is a matter of responsibility, mindfulness and empathy. Ask yourself how you score on these factors in various scenarios and find out more about your EQ.

Responsibility

For example, when you wake up in the morning and you know you have a ton of work to do, what is your instinct?

If your first idea is to make a plan and work through your tasks, you can consider yourself pretty responsible. If your immediate idea is to roll over and go back to sleep until the big bad work has gone away, well, that’s less responsible.

You might want to take some time by yourself to figure out why you’re in the line of work you are and what leading your team truly means to you.

Mindfulness

How about when you reach the end of a tough day and you’re full of stress and rejected? Do you push it down, like a supposedly good, strong leader?

Well, that’s not dealing with the problem. It’s a fast-track to burnout. Your humanity doesn’t stop at the seams of your suit. You have a soul to listen to, too.

Instead, when you’re feeling stressed, try using mindfulness techniques to reconnect with your core. You can go for a walk, listen to the sounds around you, name the colors you can see from where you’re standing or name the emotions that you’re feeling.

mindfulness walk

See Also: 7 Ways Mindfulness Can Unlock The Door To Your Authentic Life

Empathy

Suppose you have good reason to pass that heavy workload onto a colleague who’s just as busy as you. Regardless of whether that was the right or wrong decision, did you stop to think about how that would make him feel?

Dishing out heavy workloads without a thought for the emotional consequences puts you back in the ‘app’ territory. In other words, you have about as much empathy as a smartphone.

Slow down, try to only give out tough tasks face to face and make eye contact. Train yourself to remember there’s a human being behind every workplace accomplishment.

See Also: How To Develop Empathy By Understanding Subjective Hardship

How to boost your EQ

So, now you have a pretty good idea where your EQ levels are at. Unless you’re Oprah or Mr. Rogers, there’s probably room for improvement.

Most of it is stuff you can do as you work. Slow down, try to identify problems as they arise instead of steaming through them and apply some of these techniques to train your EQ:

Improving your perception of emotions

Take some ‘me’ time. Put fifteen minutes aside each day to think about what you’ve felt at various junctures. Reflect on how you felt in your mind and the way it made your body feel. Soon you will come to better recognize your emotions in real time.

And take some ‘you’ time. Observe how the individuals in your team respond to situations and to each other. When one of them has a problem, ask yourself what the reason behind their behavior might be.

Are they overworked? Insecure? Unfulfilled? How does it feel to be that person wearing those shoes?

It doesn’t mean you need to tolerate their behavior, but it might help you find ways to rectify it without negatively impacting the team.

Improving your management of emotions

So, you’ve slowed down and you’ve figured out you’re stressed, what next?

A change of context is always good and can help you get perspective. If you’re hot and bothered, splash water on your face. If you’re furious and full of self-loathing, spend five minutes watering the office plants. Seriously.

emotion management

Likewise, if you sense negative emotions in others, don’t rise to them. Instead, take a minute to collect yourself, take a deep breath and suggest they do the same.

Improving your utilization of emotions

Emotions are a powerful force. We’ve already seen how they make us human. Now, imagine if you could harness that power like a solar panel.

You can do that by tracing those emotions to their roots, figuring out what the problem is and working on it. If you feel out of your depth, write a plan. If your colleagues feel bitter and unfulfilled, give them a challenge right when they’re hungriest for it.

Now, your EQ level just rose from ‘political tyrant’ to ‘leadership ninja’. Work is about to get much better for you and all your loyal team.

Source

 

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The Secret Key To Multitasking Isn’t What You’d Think

Think back to your last firm handshake.

How much of your attention did this activity demand? Did you need to stop talking and devote your entire focus just to make sure you successfully grasped the other person’s hand?

Probably not as your brain is wired for parallel processing. Its seeing and guiding pathways allowed you to continue speaking while simultaneously doing a handshake.

Unfortunately, parallel processing doesn’t always come naturally to us.

For example, think back to the last time you found yourself listening to a conference call while responding to an urgent email. In all likelihood, that situation probably led to multitasking misery. Your heart rate and blood pressure spiked as you tossed your “undivided” attention back and forth. And, at the end of the day, neither task was executed to its full potential.

If this negative outcome sounds familiar to you, don’t worry. You’re not alone.

According to University of Utah researchers, just 2.5% of the population can be considered “supertaskers”. They are the people who can easily bounce between tasks without sacrificing quality.

In our professional lives, we would all benefit from becoming graceful jugglers who never need to focus on one ball at a time. In my book “Tinker, Dabble, Doodle, Try,” I explained how — through brain-based exercises that stimulate the default mode network (DMN), the brain’s “unfocus” circuit — we can train ourselves to become just that.tinker dabble double try

Here are three unfocus strategies that can help you develop parallel processing skills. They can make multitasking as easy as a handshake.

Dare to daydream

Throughout our lives, we’re told that daydreaming is a guilty, unproductive habit that distracts us from reality. On the contrary, however, science proves that daydreaming can actually be productive when it’s planned ahead of time and paired with a laid-back activity, like doodling or knitting.

This seemingly taboo practice played a major role in helping me leverage my passions for music, psychiatry, neuroscience and executive coaching into a business venture.

See Also: A Guide To Guilt-Free Daydreaming

Specifically, positive constructive daydreaming (PCD) is a technique that trains the brain to make quick associations and become more creative. To engage in PCD, pencil in a 10-minute period every day to find a quiet spot, pull your attention away from the computer screen and wander into your head.

Start the process by visualizing a playful and wish-laden image. It could be something relevant to the tasks currently on your plate. Then, allow this image to guide you on a productive daydreaming journey that helps you better predict the future.

According to Jerome Singer, the “father of daydreaming”, PCD is a reliable way to turn your brain into a fluent integration and association machine. This is a hallmark of parallel processing and a key ingredient of multitasking.

Get physical

A little bit of stress can actually go a long way when it comes to activating the DMN and unlocking your multitasking skills. However, it’s imperative to learn how to control this stress. Otherwise, your unfocus circuit can get stuck in the “on” position and you won’t be able to actually buckle down once it’s time to tackle tasks.

Brief periods of exercise- whether jogging or mock wrestling with your kids- offer a great way to reduce stress, bring more order to your DMN and boost your multitasking abilities. Rough-and-tumble play relieves the brain of the burden of focused attention while improving self-control. It switches your brain to autopilot and leaves you available to sense and respond.

This is exactly why I make a concerted effort to regularly incorporate physical activity into my life. I’m no Roger Federer, but I’ve found that my mind wanders toward innovative solutions when I play tennis. Through exercise, I’ve learned that physical fitness leads to mental prowess.

physical fitness

Provide feedback early and often

Motoring through your tasks without assessing your progress is the least effective thing you can do. Your brain doesn’t automatically update information and gauge results as you go along. You need to consciously provide it with this feedback and positive reinforcement. Otherwise, you’ll quickly find yourself feeling stressed and overwhelmed.

Feedback can be divided into two primary categories: local and global.

Local feedback pertains to specific tasks (e.g., “That conference call went well.”), while global feedback refers to the task list as a whole (e.g., “On average, everything seemed to have gone well.”). When it comes to multitasking, gravitate toward frequent local feedback. Check in with yourself after each task, ask yourself how it went and move forward while making any necessary adjustments.

Multitasking is a challenge to our brains. But, with some training, it can be an invaluable skill that goes beyond handshakes. Activate your DMN and familiarize yourself with its inner workings. The resulting enhanced brain function will allow for connections, coordination and smooth execution in times when you need to juggle tasks.

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5 Movie Locations To Visit This Year

If you liked our previous article on movie locations, then you’ll enjoy this one too.

The best movies have the power to transport you to exciting places or faraway worlds. They can put you in the moment and make you feel like you’re part of the action. What could be more exciting than that?

Well, how about really being there?

We’re not talking about virtual reality tours or amusement park knockoffs. We’re talking about setting your feet on the same places that set the stage for some of Hollywood’s most iconic moments — or at least their real-world counterparts.

You can pretend you’re in the middle of your favorite scenes, so recite some lines if you feel like it or take a few Instagram-worthy snaps.

Bring Hollywood to life by visiting these five inspiring movie locations.

The castle from “Harry Potter”

First of all, there’s the famous Harry Potter series.

You’re a J.K. Rowling fan and you’ve got a wand and a Ravenclaw scarf to prove it. If only you could step inside Hogwarts and get a glimpse of Harry and his wizarding pals’ world.

Well, you can! And we’re not talking about the Universal Studios look-alike in Florida.

Although this movie used plenty of cool special effects to transport you to an ageless time, its makers chose a 500-year-old school as Hogwarts’ inspiration. Hop across the pond and visit Christ Church College in Oxford, United Kingdom. Guided trots around campus cost £13 (or about $17) per person and they’ll give you all the insights you can handle. Even a Slytherin would feel a little giddy about that.

“The Sound of Music” scenery

Unfortunately, you won’t be reenacting Julie Andrew’s iconic opening scene because the meadow where the scene was shot is privately owned. The owner isn’t welcoming to visitors, too.

Fortunately, the other scenes from this classic were filmed on location in Salzburg, Austria. More than 300,000 fans journey each year to this picturesque part of Europe, looking for their own chance to climb every mountain and spot Edelweiss in bloom.

Not sure you’re comfortable exploring alone? No problem. Tours abound for “Sound of Music” aficionados like you.

The Rebel base from “Star Wars: Episode IV — A New Hope”

If you’ve got the skills to bull’s eye a womp rat in a T-16, then you’ll definitely want to check out Tikal in Guatemala.

This archeological site served as the Rebel Alliance base on Yavin 4. You won’t find any X-wings in the site’s temples. However, you can learn all about a civilization from a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. Tikal was one of the Mayan civilization’s largest cities during the Classic Era — more than 1,000 years ago.

Entry into the park will only set you back $20, but make sure you give yourself plenty of time. The central part of this ancient city covers almost 10 square miles.

The bridge from James Bond’s “Skyfall” thriller

Got a sweet spot for engineering marvels from the big screen? Then, you’ll want to check out the Varda Viaduct. This is where James Bond fell to his apparent doom in the opening of “Skyfall,” the Bond series’ 50th-anniversary offering.

Although train service prohibits tourists from walking the bridge, you can head to the surrounding cliffs in Istanbul and take in its 102-year-old glory. And if you’re going to Turkey anyway, you might as well absorb the culture.

The grate where Marilyn Monroe’s dress went viral

Finally, there’s that iconic white cocktail dress blowing in the air.

Although Marily Monroe is no longer with us, she’s cemented her place in American history and so has the location of her dress “slip-up” during the filming of “The Seven Year Itch.”

Monroe’s husband at the time, baseball slugger Joe DiMaggio, didn’t appreciate the publicity stunt. Fortunately, you can still appreciate one of the most famous subway grates in movie history. It’s in New York City, on the corner of Lexington Avenue and 52nd Street.

While there are plenty of places we can’t visit (the Death Star comes to mind), there are tons of fantastic movie locations we can still visit. Next time you watch an awesome flick, take note of the scenery and do a little research after. You might be able to see a movie magic come to life.

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Benefits Of Meditation: How You Can Change Your Life In 10 Minutes

It takes time to develop and master any skill, and meditation is no different. The ability to calm the mind on demand can be a phenomenal tool to have at your disposal.

Whether you are feeling burnt out, overrun by emotions, feeling stressed or off center, meditation can be a great catalyst to help you face the challenges in life. It gives you the ability to take a step back, gather your awareness and get back on track.

This doesn’t take away the significance of the challenge. Instead, it gives us the time to take a moment, refocus and move forward in a far more constructive way. As a result of this new way of thinking, life begins to spin in a completely different manner.

Cutting through the fog

One of the great benefits of meditation is its ability to increase your focus and clarity in specific tasks. It allows you to be more present in the moment and not get too lost in thought.

We’ve all been there – zoning out and thinking of something else, not completely digesting what was just said to us. If we can be more present with greater clarity, we can increase our attention and focus on any given task.

Managing your emotions

Let’s face it: we are emotional beings, whether we like it or not.

One of the greatest solutions meditation brings is the ability to manage and use your emotions constructively. Whenever a challenge arises, the mind can’t resist to label and comment on what’s just happened. It’s like a TV playing over and over in your head.

We tend to cloud the situation with a storyline and that story clouds our judgment. Sometimes, we may be overcome with nerves, like just before an interview, a speech, meeting new people and so on. In a business situation, emotions, like anger, can get to the surface at times.

The key point here is that meditation gives you the option to choose if the emotion serves you or not. It allows you to see the difference between what might happen and what is actually happening.

Keeping up with life’s fast pace

Businessman Busy

One of the many issues we face in today’s society is its fast pace. Having drive and ambition is a beautiful thing. Unfortunately, it can feel overwhelming especially when you have a family, work or business. Trying to keep all the plates spinning can feel tough, but it can be managed with time and training.

So, how would it feel to know you could develop a skill to calm your mind on demand? By taking ten minutes a day for yourself, you can refresh and take on the day with more clarity, commitment and ease.

Health for the mind

Meditation is simply health for the mind and the beautiful thing about it is you get to define it. Whether you would like to have a better sleeping pattern, manage stress more effectively, relate to others better or increase your happiness, it’s completely up to you!

It has all been proven. Here are the scientific benefits of meditation.

1. It helps lower your stress levels.

2. It can help reduce worry, impulsivity and anxiety.

3. Meditation increases insight and helps you develop positive relationships.

4. It can help develop your memory skills.

5. It ignites more positive emotions.

6. By meditating, you can improve your decision-making skills and the way you process information.

7. It helps you lower the volume of mental chatter.

8. It allows you to increase compassion for others and decrease the feeling of loneliness.

9. With EQ, compassion can be developed and strengthened.

10. With consistent practice, meditation can increase the gray matter in the brain related to positive emotions, compassion and awareness

See Also: The Profound Effects Of Meditation On The Mind

Stepping into the positive

As you can see, there are many scientific studies that have looked at the profound benefits of meditation. If you take just ten minutes a day, over time, your brain can begin to show positive changes.

This is commonly known as neuroplasticity or the brain’s ability to reorganize itself by forming new neural connections. Therefore, if you have always felt you’re a worrier, stressed or anxious, don’t be so quick to judge yourself. You can learn to manage difficult emotions over time and develop a healthier way of life.

Letting go of the stereotype and seeing meditation as simply health for your mind is a great place to start. We all regularly brush our teeth as we know the benefits it has to offer. It keeps them clean and stops them from falling out. You can consider meditation in exactly the same way. You can look at it as a time to declutter the mind, find space and increase your happiness!

How to get started

Here’s a short video on how to meditate for beginners.

Also, here are three tips to get you started. Remember, it only takes ten minutes a day.

1. Meditation isn’t about stopping thoughts. It’s about being able to sit comfortably and letting thoughts arise and pass.

The cars are your thoughts and your aim is to simply watch each thought pass through without judgment. Remember, this is a skill and you may be shocked to see how many cars are actually there. But, don’t worry. This will pass with time and the mind will begin to settle.

2. Finding the right balance is key when we meditate. So, we want to hold an equal amount of attention and rest. This allows the mind to rest in a sweet spot. If we are too relaxed, we may fall asleep. If we are too focused, we lose the calm we are looking for.

3. Finally, wonderful things can happen when you rest the mind in meditation. One of the greatest insights it will teach you is when your mind is fully rested, joy naturally arises. This allows us to take life in a completely different way.

When is the best time to start?

We normally recommend mornings to meditate. However, since everyone has different commitments, you can choose what works best for you. Try coupling it with something you do regularly or actually stick it in your diary!

practice meditation

10 minutes can change your whole life

We now have all the scientific research and all the information for us to increase the quality of our lives through meditation. Meditation can help you manage stress, grow in resilience, increase joy and find a new perspective on happiness!

It only takes 10 minutes a day! So, take the steps and increase the quality of your life!

“If you don’t have 10 minutes, you don’t have a life” – Tony Robbins

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Choosing The Perfect Handmade Diamond Ring For Your Engagement

Knowing how to choose an engagement ring is tricky and buying it is quite a challenging task. You would not like to go wrong on any count since it has a lot of emotional significance. It is a symbol of your deep love, dedication and bond with your life-partner-to-be.

Before stepping out to buy the best engagement ring ever, you must have a crystal clear idea of exactly what you are looking for. As a guide, here’s how to choose an engagement ring.

Determine Your Budget

You need to consider several important factors when buying an engagement ring. One of these factors is your financial capability. As much as possible, do not go overboard.

Apart from that, you should also choose the ring style that will perfectly complement your partner’s personality and lifestyle.

Start by Browsing the Web

You could browse the Internet and go through the latest collections online to draw some inspiration. This way, you could visualize the ring style and diamond shape that’s just right for you before getting your diamond ring customized.

By going through an extensive collection online, you’ll be able to find out if you are attracted to square or round shaped diamonds. You can check out multiple stone settings, contemporary designs or vintage ones. You could choose from a stunning collection of handmade rings that are designed to perfection.

Look for Real-Life Inspiration

You could solicit advice from your friends and family. You could draw inspirations from utter strangers, too. Many of them would be happy to let you try out their rings. This could be a great way to start your engagement ring shopping.

Check Out the 4 Cs for the Best Diamond

If you want to know how to choose an engagement ring, you must learn how to check the clarity, cut, color and carat of the diamond.

The cut of a diamond determines its brilliance. A diamond with a better cut would dazzle more. If your diamond seems to be more colorless, it would imply higher quality grade. Color grade depends on the actual lack of color.

Almost all diamonds are known to have some imperfections. Diamonds that have negligible or no imperfections are given the highest clarity grades. Carat, on the other hand, refers to the real measure of a diamond’s exact weight. It is, however, not the only factor that determines the brilliance and value of a diamond.

Keep these 4Cs in mind while choosing the diamond for your engagement ring. Examining the certification is important, too, so buy a certified diamond.

Choose the Right Shape

The shape refers to the form of a diamond from the top view. Rather than the cut, it identifies the genuine geometry, edges and features of the stone. You could get a diamond that has a round, emerald, princess, square, pear, oval or heart shape.

Choose the Best Metal

There are endless metal options. You could choose from the usual yellow gold or the popular rose gold. You could also get your ring made with a platinum, silver or palladium metal.

Choose a metal as per your own personal preference. If most of your ornaments are made from yellow gold, you could stick with the same material. If you are more used to silver accessories, you could opt for platinum.

Choose a metal that looks great on your specific skin tone. With regards to the band, you have an assortment of metals to pick from. One prominent decision is platinum as it’s strong and particularly immaculate. It makes a great decision for ladies and grooms with delicate skin.

There’s gold, too. It typically comes in an assortment hues, including white, yellow and even green. Past platinum and gold, you may likewise consider palladium, which has a grayer shade than platinum. You can also consider a reused metal band, which may incorporate a blend of platinum and gold.

Conclusion

Apart from your personal preferences and unique specifications, you also need to make sure about the ring’s size. It needs to fit your finger snugly and comfortably. Choose a perfect fit so that you could flaunt your engagement ring all your life.

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How To Be Awesome: 3 Ways To Be The Most Interesting Man in the World

Long before the Dos Equis commercials came out about The Most Interesting Man in the World, I wanted to be that guy. I envisioned myself as that one person at parties that everyone flocked to because I had done amazing things and had captivating stories.

I often imagined this:

“Hey, Bill! Come over here. This guy is telling a story about how he parachuted out of an airplane over the Sahara, ran an ultra-marathon through the desert and then spent a week living with a tribe of nomads!”

I didn’t do any of those things, by the way. But, that was my goal. I wanted to be awesome! And while I certainly didn’t become the most interesting man in the world, I did do a few awesome things along the way. Even better than that, I met some awesome people who did even more awesome things.

The more awesome you are, the more people will be drawn to you. And if people are drawn to you, then you will put yourself in situations where opportunities are abundant. Perhaps, someone finds you interesting and invites you to a party where you’ll meet your future wife. Or, maybe, you tell a story in one interview and that makes you memorable enough to get hired.

But, being awesome and doing awesome things isn’t just about looking cool at a party. It’s about getting out of your comfort zone and pushing yourself beyond your status quo.

People and stories that are recognized as awesome are seen as such because they’re unusual and out of the ordinary. That means you have to do something outside of your comfort zone. You need to push yourself.

By pushing ourselves outside of our comfort zones, we’ll find out things about ourselves that we never knew. We’ll discover that we are capable of so much more.

So, while being awesome and doing awesome things can make you the life of the party, there’s more to it than just that. Knowing how to be awesome is knowing how to push yourself beyond your limits and discover the deeper depths within you.

So, here are 3 quick ways to be awesome:

Do At least One Epic Activity

When I was 24, I traveled to Europe with a buddy and ran with the bulls in Pamplona, Spain. I wore the white pants and shirt with the red sash and weaved in and out of the crowd, dodging bulls along the cobbled streets of Pamplona.

That one story has given me an “awesome factor” for 10 years. I tell it at parties, during meet-and-greet ice breaker games and to pretty much anyone. Before I met my wife, I told the story on every first date I ever went on.

Every single time, it gets the same response: “That’s awesome!” Then, they’ll ask questions and I get to tell the whole story over and over again.

By the end of the 5-minute story, I am the most interesting man in the world- or at least the most interesting man within a 10-foot radius! This one epic activity has carried me for years.

I’m not the daredevil type. But, when people hear this story, they immediately think I’m some badass. My wife laughs every time people say things, like “Wow, you’re a real adventurist!”.

But, in their minds, that story makes me awesome. You know why? Because it is awesome.

Over the years, I’ve known others with similar, awesome tales of epic activities. I met a guy who swam with Great White Sharks in South Africa, another who cared for rhinos on an animal reserve in Africa and another who got scuba certified in Thailand.

Tell one of those stories at a party and you’ll be instantly awesome. But, more important than that, you get to live out the activity and stretch yourself beyond what you thought you were capable of. And that’s more awesome.

Travel to Awesome Places and Embrace the Locals

To fully appreciate the world and see things from different angles, you need to see the world. This doesn’t mean you have to be a non-stop traveler or the person that wanders the world for a year. You should, at least, get out and see a few places outside of your comfort zone.

I am not actually a great traveler. I get nervous leaving the country (I think I watched too many episodes of Locked Up Abroad) and prefer to travel around the U.S. But, I know that this limits me and that I have to get out of my comfort zone.

So, over the years, I have pushed myself to travel to different countries. I still have much of the world to see but, by overcoming my fears and stretching myself, I know I’m to a great start.

Once you do travel to an awesome place, you need to ditch the tourist traps and hang out with the locals. No one cares if you saw the Colosseum in Rome. Everyone that goes to Rome does that. Getting drunk with the locals and laughing at each other’s accents, on the other hand, is awesome.

I went to Scotland once. When I talk about that trip, nobody cares to hear about the rolling hills or visiting St. Andrews. Everyone that goes to Scotland sees those things.

So, instead of that, I tell the story about how my buddy and I went to a local dive bar in the shipping yard of Aberdeen. We were looking to mix it up with some local drunk sailors and get into an old-fashioned bar fight. The plan backfired, however, as the Scottish shipping industry had apparently clamped down on drinking at port years ago.

Instead of encountering badass sailors with anchor tattoos, we stumbled into what used to be known as the toughest bar in Aberdeen only to find it was now owned by a nice Indian gentleman and his cute little puppy.

Despite that, we still made the best of it and did some weird shots with him before heading off to pay drunken homage to the town’s Braveheart statue. It was an awesome, memorable experience.

Anyway, if you want to be awesome, go to awesome places and hang out with awesome people.

See Also: 7 Important Things To Do To Travel Like A Local

Help Others

Helping others is, perhaps, the most awesome thing you can do. If you are able to help someone in need, whether it be something as large as building a water well in a remote village or as small as just being a good friend in times of need….well, there is just something so awesome about that type of love that it’s hard to explain in words. You have to feel it.

I have met people who have traveled to Africa to build water wells in Uganda. I have also met people who have traveled to Southeast Asia to build schools. On top of that, I also got to meet a person who taught children in South America how to read and surf! That is a lot of awesomeness!

I also know people who volunteer at the local pantry once a month, others that donate clothes to the homeless and even people who spend time with their elderly relatives. That is a lot of awesomeness as well!

Knowing how to be awesome isn’t that hard. You just have to take yourself out of your comfort zone and do something for others. It will stretch you as a person and make for an awesome story. Most importantly, it will mean the world to the person you are helping.

Do epic things, travel to awesome places and help your brothers and sisters in the world and you will be AWESOME!!!

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9 Smart Investments to Improve Your Rental Properties

Owning a rental property can be a lot of work but wise management can keep it profitable for years to come. Whether you’re new to the game or an old veteran, these 6 modern features can increase property value as well as make it more comfortable for residents.

1. Wi-Fi

If your rental property doesn’t have Wi-Fi yet, better install it quick. Wi-Fi has become the standard for homes and businesses and if you want to stay marketable, a strong Wi-Fi signal is a must.

However, partnering with a low-quality Internet service can actually hurt, rather than help, your marketability.

Here are the top 10 service providers of 2017, according to Top Ten Reviews:Top Ten Reviews:

1. Comcast
2. Time Warner Cable
3. Verizon
4. AT&T
5. Cox
6. Charter
7. Suddenlink
8. Cable One
9. CenturyLink
10. Frontier

2. Solar-Powered Water Heater

Conventional natural gas or electric water heaters can be a substantial monthly expense. More importantly, they can make up a big part of your carbon footprint, too. Investing in a solar-powered heater is a one-time outlay that saves on both money and pollutant emissions.

Photo credit: thegreenmanproject.com

3. Home Automation

If you’re installing a solar-powered water heater, why not go one step further with home automation? Home automation devices like smart thermostats, smart lighting and smart HVAC can save energy, reduce a home’s carbon footprint and boost property value.

4. Home Surveillance

Home security systems, like those offered by ADT, Frontpoint and Armorax, should be next on your list of value-boosting property enhancements. With features like cameras, motion sensors, alarms, 24-hour surveillance and easy-to-use controls, they can protect your buyer and your reputation.

As you compare companies, keep in mind that although quality comes with a price, it pays in the long run.

See Also: 8 Sharp-witted Ways To Protect Your Rental Homes

5. Smart Doorbell

A doorbell may not be the first investment that comes to your mind, but have you heard of smart doorbells?

They’re the new peephole, allowing residents to discreetly view visitors while remaining hidden. Some smart doorbells also offer a monitoring feature so you can see a visitor before they even reach the door. Although small, these nifty devices can also boost property value.

Photo credit: securitysales.com

6. Central Air Conditioning

If your property does not already have central air, it’s time to get that installed. This will not only make your tenants’ lives more comfortable but it can also save energy costs in the long run.

Central air systems cost roughly $0.30 to $0.50 per hour at $0.10 kWh. For comparison, one window unit costs $0.11 to $0.75 per hour, depending on the size of the room being cooled. Keep in mind that most properties need more than one window unit to stay cool.

7. Water Softener

If your property is in an area with hard water, invest in a water softener. Hard water can create mineral buildups in pipes and appliances, like washing machines, dishwashers, and hot water heaters. Eventually, this can substantially reduce performance and lifespan in these appliances, forcing you to pay for repairs or even replacement sooner than necessary.

Having a water softener improves your property’s appraisal value and, as an added benefit, can prevent unsightly deposits on faucets, shower doors, etc.

8. Landscaping

If yard maintenance is not part of your tenant’s rental contract, then the responsibility of keeping the place looking nice falls to you as the landlord. Rental properties with curb appeal are worth more as well as they are better able to attract tenants when you have a vacancy.

Key areas to pay attention include:

  • Weeding flower beds/around shrubs
  • Mowing and watering the lawn
  • Trimming trees and shrubs
  • Raking fallen leaves in fall
  • Clearing snow from driveway/sidewalks

revamp garden

 

Landscaping is one area that can trap you into wasting money. Take care not to go overboard. Additions like ponds, fountains, and even swimming pools cost more than they are worth.

9. Renovations

Are your rental’s appliances getting old? Are the carpets looking shabby? Has the paint lost its pristine glow?

A renovation is an old trick of the trade, but not one to be forgotten. Updating the kitchens and bathrooms is a big one and it can provide about 80% ROI. The right changes can’t only improve property value but also attract higher-income tenants.

Conclusion

As you manage your rental properties, don’t forget that your renters always come first. Take care of them and you will have stable profits for years to come.

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HCG For Weight Loss: Evaluating Its Effectiveness

The combination of the HCG hormone and a calorie-restrictive diet is an incredibly popular weight-loss solution which people around the world are eager to have a go at.

There are numerous reviews online touting the success of the diet, but that does not mean that introducing a hormone into your system to trigger weight loss is any less of a controversial topic. It’s up to us to have a closer look at the use of HCG for weight loss and decide on its effectiveness for ourselves.

In order to evaluate the effectiveness of the diet, we need to have a look at the science behind it and how this diet came to be.

What Is HCG Hormone?

The HCG hormone is produced by women who are pregnant. While overeating and constant cravings are the most popular symptoms associated with pregnancy, nausea and loss of appetite are also suffered by expecting mothers. And it’s the HCG hormone that’s responsible for the appetite suppressing attributes of pregnancy.

The HCG hormone is also responsible for the baby receiving all of the nutrients it needs to grow, even when the mother is not eating much food herself. The HCG hormone forces the body to turn to stubborn fat stores in order to meet the nutritional demands of the growing fetus. The fat deposits around the abdomen, hips, and thighs are used to create energy for the unborn child.

But, how has this idea been adopted as a weight loss solution?

The Use Of HCG For Weight Loss

The HCG hormone is now being administered in the form of injections, pills and HCG drops in order to stimulate the same effects it has in pregnant women.

Everyone complains about how incredibly difficult it is to get rid of the stubborn fat, even with the help of a good diet and exercise. This is one of the reasons why HCG drops and injections are gaining popularity.

The creator of the diet, Simeons, did note that expecting mothers would have a lot of their calories used up by the growing fetus. This, as a result, creates a calorie deficit which would force the body to turn to fat stores for energy.

Since people using HCG for weight loss aren’t pregnant, they need to follow a strict calorie-restrictive diet. This diet contains just around 500 calories, which is far lower than the calorie requirements of the average person.

What does this mean?

As with many diets, the body turns to fat stores and muscle stores for energy when it is in an extreme calorie deficit.

See Also: Shifting Your Family To The “Real Food” Diet

How Do People Take The HCG Hormone?

Initially, the HCG hormone was only available in the form of injections. They had to be administered by a doctor back then. Now, this is considered to be the most invasive method.

Today, anyone can buy HCG pills and HCG drops online and use them in the comfort of their own home. This allows for individuals to try the diet without the use and expense of doctors and injections.

The most successful method is the HCG drops. This is because it allows the hormone to go directly into the bloodstream via the glands under the tongue.

Why Is There So Much Controversy Surrounding The HCG Diet?

The HCG diet has helped a lot of people lose weight, lower blood pressure and lower cholesterol. With all of these amazing benefits, why is it that many healthcare professionals do not agree with Simeon’s revolutionary diet?

Healthcare professionals claim that it is the calorie-restrictive diet alone- not the HCG hormone- that makes all of those things possible.

Tests have been performed in which test subjects ate a calorie-restrictive diet to find out the effects. For the results, the subjects managed to lose unwanted fat and have lower cholesterol and blood pressure levels.

There is no scientific evidence that can establish the unique link between HCG hormone and weight loss. Despite this, a lot of people are still giving it a try.

Conclusion

A calorie restrictive diet, especially one which is as low as 500 calories, can be incredibly difficult to stick to. Apart from that, the 500-calorie diet is also not sustainable due to the calorie consumption being too low. This is the reason so many people quit their diet and resume their regular unhealthy eating patterns.

There have been reports that the HCG hormone does help to suppress the appetite. This enables the dieter to stay in a calorie deficit long enough to benefit from weight loss.

Whether the HCG hormone has these effects or it’s simply a placebo, it is still a topic up for debate.

 

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