3 Simple Ways To Overcome Your Deepest Insecurities (And Become Happier In the Process)

Six months ago, I was an insecure wreck.

If you were to look at me from the outside, you would have thought I was pretty successful for my age. I had straight A’s, offers to some of the best universities in the UK, a career that was earning me more at 23 than people will ever reach in their life, six-pack abs, and a hot girlfriend.

What more could a person ask for? Surely I must have been happy right?

Well, surprisingly no – and the reason why is pretty simply really.

Happiness is not a result of how others perceive you. It is a result of how you perceive yourself.

On the outside, I was successful but internally, I was a mess. I was insecure, constantly seeking approval, and never thought I was good enough.

I only truly realised how messed up I was during my breakup. I remember saying one thing which really made me realise that something had to change. I said, “I’m scared.”

I WAS scared.

What if I had to make new friends and no-one liked me? What if I was never going to be in a relationship again? What if I was going to be alone for the rest of my life?

These thoughts, as well as many others, haunted me. I knew something had to change.

Over the next months I did some serious self-development to conquer these fears and insecurities which I felt was inhibiting me from being happy. It was the best thing I have ever done.

Today I want to share with you the three action steps which helped transform my life, and hopefully can help you out too!

1. Be completely honest and open with yourself

be-honest-with-yourself-and-others

The worst thing you can do is hide yourself from you. Pushing all your self-limiting thoughts into a deep dark corner of your brain and locking them up is not going to get rid of them. They will still be there subconsciously affecting almost everything you do.

What I want you to do is to tell yourself aloud everything you are scared of. Then, have a deep conversation with yourself as to why.

For example, I used to always say no whenever my friends asked me to go out. When I started to question myself as to why, I realised that it was not due to the fact that I did not really like to drink at the time. It was more out of  fear of not fitting it and not being accepted for who I was.

What if I went and no-one talked me and just thought I was weird? That was the true fear which I was trying to hide from myself.

Recognizing and accepting your insecurities is your first step to surpassing them. Now that you are truly aware of what is holding you back, you can start to working with them to overcome them.

See Also: Self-Acceptance: The Key To True Happiness 

2. Do the things you love by yourself

Have you noticed that people very rarely go out to a restaurant or watch a movie by themselves?

After going through Step 1, I realised that I tended not to go out and do things by myself even if they were things I really enjoyed. I was afraid of being judged. What if people thought of me as a loner who had no friends?

After I became aware of this, I worked with myself in overcoming this fear. I started going out by myself whether it was to go for walks, go to restaurants, or do other things in public.

I love playing piano and did not have one at home so I decided to find a public one in the centre of one of the busiest train stations in the UK and just play. Why should I not play piano just because people may look at me and/or judge me?

Going out and doing things by yourself helps you not only conquer the fear of being alone and the fear of being judged, but it also helps you be autonomous. It helps you to become independent and free.

The analogy I love to use is this. Your emotional state is a cup of water. For a lot of people, their cup is half empty, and the people who they emotionally depend on fill the cup.

In the past, these people consisted of my two bestfriends and my then-girlfriend. I depended on them a lot and spoke to them almost daily.

However, I realized that your cup should already be full from the get go. You should be emotionally complete regardless, and then your friends, family and loved ones overflow the cup. Having your cup already full alleviates the need to rely on other people to be emotionally happy.

Remember me saying I was scared? Well this was due to a fear of being alone and being chucked out of my little comfort bubble which had been built up over the years.

Being emotionally independent is so important for long-term happiness. Unfortunately, people are going to come and go out of your life for all sorts of reasons. Why would you let your emotional state be controlled by things you cannot control?

Going out and tackling the world by yourself will help you transition from the feeling of needing people in your life to simply wanting them in your life. This is such a subtle yet powerful change in mind-set which will help you free yourself from the feeling of attachment to others.

See Also: 3 Things You Need To Stop Doing To Live The Life Of Your Dreams

3. Appreciate

appreciate-what-you-have-always

It’s amazing how you can truly have everything in the world and be sad, and yet someone with next to nothing can be happy. Happiness is very much dependent on how much you appreciate the things you do have rather than the quantity of what you actually have.

For example, I was feeling a bit down as a lot of things have not been going my way.

I was at work on a Friday night working my socks off for tight deadlines whilst all my friends were out relaxing or having fun. I also had to study for another 3 hours afterwards for exams I have in the coming weeks. I have not been seeing as much growth as I would have liked on my sites and I was annoyed with myself at how I had let my body go quite a bit because of work, which made me even more annoyed.

If I wanted to, I could have let this spiral downwards. I could have resented my weekend as I had to study more, and I could have used every negative event which could have occurred to fuel my sadness.

Instead of doing all of that, I took a moment to walk up to the rooftop of my office building, and I just appreciated.

I took a moment to think about all the wonderful and glorious things in my life.

Although I’m working late on Friday and have to study, I have been blessed with this opportunity which so few people would ever have. And although my website has not grown to where I have wanted it to be, I have been blessed with the drive to pursue my objectives. I am also incredibly lucky to be completely healthy – people are struggling to survive as we speak.

The 10 minutes I spent staring at the London skyline gave me a sense of internal satisfaction. I felt grateful and happy for everything I have in life which has allowed me to be the person I am today.

I also took a moment to just appreciate the skyline. It is absolutely stunning and fascinating how we as a human race went from kindling fire to living in skyscrapers!

Simply appreciating external or internal things goes a long way in making you feel happier and more content with the world.

Closing thoughts

Happiness stems from the ability to love. Overcoming our deepest fears and insecurities helps us love ourselves, and the ability to appreciate and be grateful for everything you have and experience in this world helps you love life!

Whether you are feeling like you need some help in your life, or whether you feel over the moon, I do suggest you give these 3 steps a go. It worked wonders for me and I hope it can do the same for you too.

 

 

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5 Instant Ways To Look More Confident

Have you ever sat around with a coffee at a cafe, noticing all the well dressed people walking around town? You could be wearing your Sunday best too, but there is a certain type of people that just easily stand out from the crowd. It could be their polished shoes, straight blazers or new haircuts, or could be none of those things – it could just be the way they walk!

Someone’s whole image can be defined by the way they display their confidence in their step. Showing confidence is the best way to secure new jobs and make great first impressions. Studies have shown that strong confidence is the key to success in almost every type of positive social interactions. Take a look at some of the easy things you can do to show more confidence throughout the day.

confidence21. Straighten your posture with this easy trick

People react to good posture positively, so the first thing you can do to put the oompf back in your step, is to correct your posture immediately. We admire people who have good posture because when we see adults with poor posture we believe it is still a sign that they have not overcome issues from when they were younger. People develop their posture while they are young, and we are all familiar with the image of a slouching teenager. Maybe we’ve all been!

Adults with good posture are somehow admirable to us because they have overcome the little things and taken charge of life. A trick that soldiers use in the army to remind their body to keep their back straight is to walk with your thumbs pointed forward. It seems silly, but it works! Are you trying it now? It’s a little body trick that helps erect your back, and no one will notice how silly look since you can do it incognito.

2. Walk into the room with a smile

One of the greatest tips I learned at a young age to differentiate myself from other people was to always walk into a room with a smile. This separates you from all the other individuals that people see. You look approachable, friendly and inviting.

Whenever I’m about to enter a room, I think of something funny to myself – anything silly from the day or maybe a little joke I saw on the internet earlier. It aims to throw a quick smile on my face (whether or not I’m having a good day), and is easy to throw aside in your head after you’ve started chatting with others. Because with a smile like yours, everyone will be wanting to talk with you!

3. Find your best look

It helps to be confident if we feel confident about ourselves. If you’re about to do something with some people, or want to be seen in public, go with what looks best for you – leave the experimentation at home. Alternatively, if you’re comfortable with your appearance, try to do something a little different for once; the new you might make you feel particularly snazzy! (Just try not to think about it all day when you’re out!)

4. Leave the worries at home

People can tell when you’re upset. It could be the “I’m fine,” (we all know what that means), or just an unconscious thinking face, but they can see. If you want to look confidence, please leave your thoughts at home. Focus on the moment of the day you are in now and enjoy it the most you can. Worrying does not fix the past or future, but it does stop you from enjoying the present.

5. Own the day!

You’re out, you’re about, you’re with people. Take the day! If you have to continuously remind yourself to smile and look up, do it. It works. If you have to play comedies in your head all day to keep a smile and your back straight, do it. Smiling is contagious and it works in reverse – the more you smile and enjoy, the better you will feel too!

Confidence is all in your head. You don’t even have to be confident to look confident. Just stand up straight with a smile, don’t be afraid to look someone in the eyes, and shake hands firmly. Even if you’re having a bad day, follow these ideas and people will be none the wiser!

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3 Yoga Techniques to Overcome the Writer’s Block

Anyone who has ever written a long piece has faced that dreaded feeling of running out of words, being stuck and unable to continue the story. That lack of creativity filled by procrastination otherwise known as the writer’s block. And while it is true that the one and only guaranteed method to overcome it is by actually writing, I have to say that since I started doing yoga it has helped me gain a little bit of creativity and loosen up to allow the words flow easier.

A good yoga session helps to gain mindfulness, which is something really valuable to avoid distractions when you are in front of a blank paper. Also, the poses on the mat stretch the muscles that get tight due to long hours sitting at your desk. And there is nothing like Savasana to relax and prepare to start writing. But besides these known facts, I’ve learned a few tricks through my yoga practice to encourage my fingers to start typing.

writers_blockI don’t pretend that they’re the magical solution to the writer’s block, but they have certainly helped me to overcome it more often than not. That’s why I want to share these three techniques:

Vinyasa Writing

Vinyasa yoga is the style that synchronizes you body movements with the breath. One day, after staring at my empty screen for several minutes, it occurred to me that I could bring that concept into my writing.

So, even if I had no ideas in my mind, I took a long breath and while exhaling I wrote whichever sentence came to my mind. During the next inhalation, I read what I had written and got ready for the next exhalation, which came with another sentence. It didn’t matter if what I wrote was all pure non-sense, as Louis L’Amour once said: “Start writing, no matter what. The water does not flow until the faucet is turned on”. After a few cycles of breath, I was not only more relaxed, but the words that I was putting together started to make sense.

This is by far my favorite technique to avoid the writer’s block. There is no way you can avoid breathing, therefore there is no way you can avoid writing. Once you’ve done a few minutes of uninterrupted Vinyasa Writing, it is quite possible that you come up with more ideas; keep the flow and start editing once you’re satisfied with your progress.

Inversion Inspiration

Inversion poses such as headstand, handstand, Downward Facing Dog (or anything in which the heart level is above the head), are well-known for their creative benefits. The extra oxygen flow and the blood circulating faster in your brain can provide you with more clarity to solve any problem. Also, when the world turns upside down, you get a different perspective to find new answers or come up with a nice twist to your story.

Every now and then, when I’m really blocked, I take a few minutes to do any of these poses to see if somehow a great idea was stuck below my neck and needed a push to find its way to my head. Worst case scenario, it makes me laugh about how ridiculous my reasoning sounds.

If you can’t perform a perfect inversion, use a wall to support yourself or find an alternative to hang your head below your heart level.

Kundalini Creative Mantras

Kundalini yoga is a style that uses mantras to keep the mind present and aware. The Adi Mantra is normally used at the beginning of a session. It is used for tuning in to the divine flow and the self-knowledge within us. It means “I bow to the Creative Wisdom”, I bow to the Divine Teacher within; thus, by repeating it, we’re automatically creating a connection with that creativity that we’re lacking.

There is another powerful mantra passed down from Yogi Bhajan to boost creativity, it is Har Haray Hari Waheguru. Its four parts represent the cycle of infinite creativity, starting from the seed, then the flow of the creative force and its manifestation while showing joy along the process. It translates to “All aspects of the Creator Are Bliss”.

And if you don’t believe in the power of the specific mantras or don’t like to repeat unknown words for you, then create your own! The idea is to have a mental repetition that will help you concentrate. So, just sit down and Leeeet theee Woooords Beeeegiiiiin.

If you have the time to go away and spend several days writing and doing yoga, a yoga retreat is just perfect to avoid the writer’s block. If you like the idea, you can visit BookYogaRetreats.com and find the one that you like best. They even have retreats tailored for writers!

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3 Writing Techniques to Increase your Self-Esteem

One of the challenges of modern living is the inability to control and command your own self-belief and self-esteem accordingly. It’s a common affliction and one that tends to rock back and forth on a daily basis.

A good moment in the day makes it memorable while a single bad moment makes it one to forget. It’s very easy to find yourself in a position whereby you have no self-esteem purely through having a fluctuation of good and bad days.

Naturally, this can leave you with very little belief in yourself. The easiest way to reinvigorate yourself is through writing.

Here are three ways you can channel writing to build confidence.

Write down your pains and get your answers

write-down-pains-and-answers

Because our daily lives are so chaotic, it’s hard to find the time to deconstruct your thoughts. Our minds are a whirlwind of confusion. You start to lose perspective on how you think and feel on certain subjects. When confusion takes over, your self-esteem will plummet.

The most powerful construct that you can use in your favour is the power of writing. Writing is probably one of the most therapeutic powers that you can have in your arsenal. It allows you to get thoughts out of your mind that you never even know that you had!

Writing is the ultimate tool for finding your positivity, as well. Why?

See Also: 3 You Won’t Believe Ways To Boost Your Self Esteem 

Answer your Own Problems

A significant benefit of running a blog, for example, is that it allows you to gain clarity on your own problems.

People usually seek out other people in order to have a sounding board. It helps them to empty their mind of their fears and thoughts. In these instances, it’s enough to sit and listen to others and just let them talk.

Well, a blank page on a computer screen just might be a better sounding board. As you write and thrash out your feelings and thoughts, you will find answers. You start to challenge what you have written on the screen and wind up becoming your own psychiatrist.

Soon, those problems that had “impossible” answers become a whole lot easier to solve. You can start to believe in yourself and fully appreciate that you do know what you are talking.

Solve a Crisis of Confidence

solve-crisis-with-confidence

Writing is the most therapeutic of all powers. In terms of making your self-esteem grow, it helps you to realise that your thoughts cloud your intelligence. When everything is swirling around in your head, it’s hard to know exactly what you think or feel.

That makes it easy to see yourself as dumb, easily led or whatever. It’s a common enough problem and one that leads people to doubt the efficiency and brilliance of their own minds.

Don’t let that continue to be the case.

The beautiful and engaging therapy of writing is something that can capture your intelligence. It should take you no time at all to understand that by listening to yourself and decoding your own answers. You are far more than your negative thinking allows you to see.

See Also: Self-Acceptance: The Key To True Happiness 

 

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Snapchat for Small Business: A Guide for Beginners

Snapchat is the best example of a breakaway innovation that’s taken social media by storm. With more than 200 million active monthly users, Snapchat is a rapidly growing platform businesses need to take note of.

But what exactly is Snapchat for business?

A good place to start would be to look at how the market uses it in the first place. Statistics show that 76% of Snapchat users buy their products online making it in ideal platform for sales and marketing campaigns.

A large part of Snapchat’s market belongs to millennials and Gen Z populations. Because they identify as digital natives, online platforms are much more familiar and convenient for them than traditional methods.

You would missing out on a great marketing opportunity if you don’t get on the Snapchat hype to grow your business.

The Snapchat Appeal

snapchat-app

Snapchat is a wildly popular app that lets users send videos, photos, and even texts otherwise called ‘snaps’. You can send them to friends or post them publicly on your profile. Part of what makes it interesting is that these snaps get deleted within 10 seconds of viewing.

Sounds strange? Its target demographic of youths love it.

Nearly half of Snapchat users in the US are part of Gen Z, meaning that this fleeting feature can be quite attractive to this type of market. To get a better understanding of why this works, look at the type of lifestyle the youth of today are generally known for.

Self-expression, creativity, and freedom from reprisals are all things that Gen Z and millennials crave – and exactly what 10-second snaps offer. This makes the platform a perfect way to reach out to your young target market.

See Also: How to Use Snapchat Like a Boss

Using Snapchat as an effective marketing tool

snapchat-for-marketing

A beginner to Snapchat may not immediately get the rationale behind the app, more so how to work it. But even if you’re not a digital native like the rest of your target demographic,, you can still learn to work the ropes in a matter of minutes.

Take some time to consider these highly effective social media marketing strategies.

1. Provide real time action

Snapchat has a Live Stories feature where users can build a Story with other users nearby their place. A Story is an album of snaps that stays active for 24 hours after being sent, making it longer than the usual Snap.

Think of a Story as a live broadcast of any event or campaign you have. Even if people can’t be there, they can see how fun and engaging your events are. Looking at young people of today’s highly digitized but also experience-seeking lifestyles, this can give you great leverage in interacting with audiences even if they’re far away.

A great example is Heineken’s successful Snapchat campaign during Coachella, where it used a combination of live snapping and teasing the audience. The brand sent out cropped photos as snaps to let users guess who was going to turn up to this year’s biggest music and fashion event among millennials.

2. Give your audience a sense of privilege

One way to reward loyal customers is by by making them feel special. In Snapchat, you do this by sending snaps of offerings that are yet to be released in public. Think of it as a secret preview of sorts.

The great thing about Snapchat is that it’s perfect for such teasers. You don’t have to show the entire product right away. Pique people’s interests by giving just a few hints. Add an emoticon or a snap text. Send several snaps that build up to that big reveal. This will build suspense among your audience.

If there’s one thing you need to know about today’s young generations, it’s that their FOMO (fear of missing out) is very strong. Once you’ve built a buzz in the community, it’s bound to spread to their networks as well.

3. Create excitement through promos, coupons, and contests

But don’t just make it a plain old offer. Utilize Snapchat’s expiring snaps to create a sense of urgency with every promo released. This gives a whole new meaning to “available for a limited time only”.

Digital Content Editor Ken Barnaby of EduGeeksClub, remembers his own Snapchat marketing experience, “I got a snap for a free meal in one of the local restaurants. I had to click it before I ran out of time!”

4. Personalize the experience

Your customers want to feel like you are talking to them personally and not just as a general member of a target market. One way to make your engagement feel more personal is by letting your audience get closer to your authentic brand identity. It’s like being with a close friend.

Nat Young from the Association of Surfing Professionals sends out his own snap selfies to fans with fun autographs that show a wacky and quite human side of him. Letting people know you’re not a distant machine will draw them closer to you.

5. Get influencers on board

Influencers are online personalities who have a great following. Looking to them for some help can leverage your brand with their followers. Make use of the great network at hand to you.

For example, McDonald’s snapped an all-star cast of LeBron James and other sports personalities like NFL players in special behind-the-scenes footage. Attracting both fans of sports and fast food, the brand was able to make itself relevant in this platform.

See Also: 4 Free Business Productivity Apps To Help You Grow Your Small Business

The Takeaway: It’s Not Hard to Go With the Flow

An older generation of marketers might feel a disconnect with its millennial audience. But this shouldn’t discourage you from reaching out. In fact, exploring avenues like Snapchat is a great way to grow your market and convert your leads!

 

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9 Things You Can Do To Make Changing Devices A Breeze

If you work remotely for a corporation, you will be required to get a new computer and phone almost every year. This is a part of a lot of organizations’ standard operating procedures to help ensure their security and development.

If you are looking for ways to make the transition a lot easier and more efficient, here are a few ideas you can use when changing devices.

1. Put it on your calendar

Organizations generally have policies about when their employees need to get a new laptop. Most of them require upgrading devices every two to three years.

Find out what your company’s policy is and add the date to your calendar. For convenience, you can set a reminder two months before the actual due date.

2. Keep track

Setting a reminder two months prior to the actual due date will give you enough time to prepare. Use this time to create a list of all the software you have on your laptop. You can also take screenshots.

Documenting everything can make transferring software to your new device a lot easier.

3. Create a back-up

back-up-documents

It is always a good idea to backup your files on a regular basis, particularly if you know you have to frequently change devices.

Aside from backing up your data files, you should also keep a record of your e-mails, calendar, contacts and favorites. Although most companies provide a way to transfer data to new devices, having your own copy can give you added security.

4. Clean-up

If security is important to your organization, they will have a process to ensure corporate data is deleted from your device. You should also do the same thing on your end.

Check for vital information that may be stored on your computer and delete as necessary. Clean up your browser history and any other confidential information.

5. Plan around the transition

If you have the option to choose when you need to change devices, it’s a good idea to have it done before you go on vacation. Shipping your old device to your company and waiting for the new one to arrive can take around 3 to 4 business days.

I have sent my laptop back to my company while I was on a vacation and when I got back, I had my new laptop ready with the software I needed to load on it. I did speak to tech support prior to my vacation and provided them with the list of software.

See Also: Eco-Friendly Ways Of Disposing Of Your Electronic Gadgets

6. Inform your team

If you are not going to have your laptop for a few days, you will need to work off of your cell phone. E-mail yourself some of the documents you will need for the next five business days or save them to your online storage drive.

You should also inform your team that you are changing devices.

See Also: Using Technology to Organize Your Life Without Paper 

7. Check programs

Once you get your new laptop, you need to confirm if all the software you need are loaded properly. Install your printer and scanner driver and make sure that your Wi-Fi setting is configured properly. Customize your new laptop to make it more efficient for your work.

8. List down passwords

create-list-of-passwords

Saving your passwords in your browser can save you a lot of time. Despite its convenience, however, it’s really not that helpful when you’re transitioning between devices. Since your passwords are already stored, it’s relatively easy to forget them in the long run.

One way to address this is to create an excel sheet with all your accounts and passwords. Because they are already in a list, you won’t have to reset your accounts just to access them again.

Some companies invest on password managers as they offer more security compared to an Excel spreadsheet. The most popular password managers are LastPass and 1Password.

9. Ask for help

If you have a tech support team, make sure you reach out to them if you have any questions or clarifications. They have the skills and knowledge about handling technical problems. They should be able to assist you well when it comes to changing devices.

 

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Be Your Best Self, Try Patience!

As an obstetrician, whether I like it or not I have to be patient.  Pregnancy takes time to allow a baby to develop enough to survive the outside world.  Although many pregnant women including myself grew weary of being pregnant, few if any of us would want to trade places with a woman whose pregnancy lasted only long enough for her to deliver a premature baby who did not survive or a baby that had to remain weeks or even months in the hospital. Labor takes time for a woman to deliver.  Yes, we sometimes have to intervene for the sake of the mother or the baby, but sometimes intervening too early can lead to procedures that may have otherwise been avoided.  Interestingly enough although I chose a profession that requires patience, I do not consider myself a patient person except when I exercise my profession.  But what I realize in just the same way we needed time to develop as babies in the womb, we need time to develop into our best selves and that certainly requires patience.

patienceI was sitting at a dinner event with a lovely lady recently and she had a goal to loose 30 lbs.  We discussed the steps she was taking and she was indeed doing all the right things but she lamented that she had not lost any weight.  When we spoke further she revealed that she started the process only two weeks ago but she wanted to loose the weight instantly.  I reminded her that she didn’t gain the weight instantly and encouraged and reassured her that if she stuck to it she will see the results.

I want to offer you the same encouragement in each and every aspect of your journey to be your best self.  If you reflect on your life, chances are you will recognize that your successes were not overnight.   If you are a professional, it often required years of schooling.  If you are a business owner it likely required countless hours to allow your business to grow.  Unfortunately sometimes we fail to apply the same lessons of patience, time and effort to our personal life in the same way we do to our professional life.  If your goal is weight loss, adjust your food choices and eating habits, increase your exercise but give it time.  The vast majority of people who loose weight quickly by fad diet regain it in short order.  If your goal is learning a new language, that also requires time, effort, commitment and patience.  If your goal is to improve your ability to meditate to reduce stress, it takes practice and hence time; the list goes on and on.

My own personal journey of patience was perhaps most tested in the time it took for me to meet the man who is now my husband.  I had never hoped or expected to be married in my early twenties but as I approached my mid thirties without a prospect in site, I became anxious and frustrated.  To say that I was kicking and screaming may not be an understatement.   Although I did not appreciate some of the benefits at the time I can now look back with gratitude; gratitude that I had time to establish myself in my career; gratitude that I had time to better understand the woman I am and the type of person who would suit me best; gratitude that I had time to cultivate friendships, which with the business of family life I have now I would never had established; gratitude that I had time to travel to many different countries; gratitude that I had time to discover hobbies I enjoy.   My main regret about that time was not that it took so long to meet the right man but that I lacked the patience to fully enjoy the process.

So whether you are blessed with patience or are reluctantly forced to be patient, the category in which I sometimes feel I belong; patience is an invaluable virtue in your journey to becoming the best you.  It does not mean inactivity.  It does not mean lack of persistence.  It does not mean giving up on your dreams.  But it involves the recognition that if you stick to what you need to do and apply your best efforts the results may likely take longer than you wish.

But I do believe that if you stick to it, it will come!

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How To Create Success: 3 Essential Things You Need To Work On

The way you think can influence your life to a large extent. To know how to create success, you must first have the right mindset, beliefs, thoughts and ideas. Once you are able to change the way you think, you’ll be able to turn your situation and even your life around.

If you are wondering how you can modify your belief system, here are three essential things you need to work on.

1. Believe in your goals

believe-in-your-dreams

The first step in turning a negative belief system into a positive one is to trust your goals. You have to convince yourself that they are possible and achievable.

Successful people see things differently from unsuccessful individuals.

Instead of considering every problem as an obstacle, they look at it as a learning experience. Having a positive attitude enables them to benefit from everything happening around them.

In contrast, if you are imprisoned by negative thinking, you will always find a way to blame other people for your shortcomings. You’ll constantly look for excuses on why you can’t make something work.

See Also: 10 Habits of Successful People 

2. Visualize your dream life

Visualizing is a good way to train your mind to concentrate on your deepest desires. The beliefs, thoughts and opinions you impress on your mind have tremendous effects on your goals.

You can get your subconscious to work for you by filling it with thoughts of happiness, peace and fulfillment. Once you are able to fill it up with positivity,  your subconscious will start attracting conditions that favor your goals.

This is one good example of the law of attraction. The more positive things you think about, the more positive things will happen to you.

If you constantly drown yourself with negative thoughts and ideas, you’ll never be able to attract the right conditions that can help you achieve your goals.

Take, for example, a young boy who lived in a small town. He had a dream of making it big in New York as a script writer. Frequently, he dreamed about having his own office where he can write about his summer blockbuster movie. He pictured the view from his office as magnificent. He imagined seeing the New York skyline right from his office window.

The young boy felt positive whenever his subconscious dwelled on these ideas. He constantly recreated this dream in his mind until he received a surprise call from a long time friend who happened to live in New York. The young boy got invited to travel to the city and was able to get the career he has been dreaming of for a long time.

If this young boy persisted with negative thoughts, he won’t feel motivated enough to continue dreaming and to take action when the opportunity presents itself.

3. Do not be afraid to fail

do-not-fear-failure

Most successful people today have experienced failure at some point in their lives. They were able to pick themselves up, dust off their mistakes and move on to get to where they are today.

Failure is a healthy and inevitable part of success. You have to go through it if you want to achieve your goals.

See Also: 3 Ways On How To Turn The Fear Of Failure Into An Asset 

The first step is to identify what caused it and then find ways to turn the situation around. Take, for example, a pile of gold hiding behind a furnace.

For you to get it, you have to find ways to extinguish the fire. If you’re not brave enough to solve the problem, you won’t be able to get your hands on the gold.

Knowing how to create success is as important as your capability to execute your plans. Without taking actions, you’ll have a hard time achieving your goals.

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3 Things You Should Know Before Pursuing A Songwriting Career

When you decide to pursue a songwriting career,  you shouldn’t expect to be successful right away.

To become an industry expert, you have to know your way around. Since there’s no handbook to guide you and no course to prepare you, it’s important that you keep a realistic view of the songwriting world.

Here are a few things you should know before you invest all you’ve got in a new career.

1. Income is unpredictable

dwindling-income

You may be writing a lot of songs but it doesn’t mean that they’re all going to make money. Songwriting is only a part of the process; you need to get your songs picked up and recorded by artists before you can actually earn from them.

Aside from that, the success of your songs counts as well. They have to be downloaded a number of times and played on radio stations for them to reach more people. If they get licensed or used for films, the more successful they’ll be.

Keep in mind, however, that it could take months before you can actually earn your first paycheck. This means that you’ll have to find another way to support yourself while you are still getting started with your songwriting career.

See Also: Living the Freelancer Life: 5 things every variable income earner should know

2. Write something unique

Writing unique songs can make you a successful songwriter.

The key is to avoid tunes that are already on the radio. Although they can serve as inspirations, you should avoid copying them. You want your songs to stand out against other songs so that when they get sent to artists, they’ll find yours more catchy and interesting.

The more unique your songs are, the more chances they have of getting picked and recorded.

3. Not every song gets to be a hit

listening-to-popular-song

Your songs will go through a handful of people before they get released. The list includes the artist, the label as well as the producer. Each of these people’s opinion matters and they might shut your songs down if they can’t see any potential in them.

If ever you get turned down, do not see it as a failure. Instead, use it as a stepping stone for you to work harder and get a better songwriter career.

 

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3 Ways To Help Someone In Trouble

You know what is one of the best feelings in the world? When you get sick and have someone there to help you. You know those moments – it feels like everything’s going well in your life until out of nowhere you’ve caught a bug. If you don’t have someone there to help you, everything feels like a chore. Remember those days where it feels even impossible to stand up or get out of bed? Everything is out of the question – going outside, dealing with people, getting food, trying to cook, finding medicine. It all feels impossible to do by yourself, and we are so grateful when we have someone there to help us!

There’s nothing worse than being alone when we’re sick, and depression is just the same. People who are upset are reclusive and their symptoms are hard to follow, but it’s easy to be there for them when we catch on. People who are mentally down need the same care and attention that we would administer to someone who was physically ill. Both conditions have similar symptoms – we need to eat but it’s difficult; we need to go outside to shop, but it’s difficult; we need people around us to console us; we need good food and relaxing settings.

help_troubleIt’s easy to help someone who is depressed without letting them feel like we are being victimized by their state. If you suspect someone is feeling blue, here’s a few things you can do to brighten up their day without them feeling bad.

1. Contact them just to talk!

We are busy people these days, and don’t call our friends to say hi anymore enough. Even with the advances in social media chatting, we still don’t give our friends the time of day enough. For some, maybe it’s a bit too convenient, and we avoid it altogether to not seem clingy.

If you have a friend who is depressed, do not hesitate to say hi! It is a great gesture to reach out to someone. They will not suspect you’re acting as a doctor if you just talk about casual things. Don’t worry about catching up or discussing current events because it might just bring them back into their current predicament. Talk about fun things that will help take their mind off of things for a bit!

2. Insist they come out with you!

Depressed people are a tough bunch to get moving. When someone is sad they will avoid contact with others even though we all know that that kind of behaviour is not good for us. However, it’s still difficult to muster up the courage to be around people when we are ill.

In this case, it is your duty to get them up and running! If you’ve already been chatting to them then your friend will feel more comfortable with you. Convince them to come out for a walk through town, to get some coffee, or a drink and some food. Somewhere fun where their mind can wander a bit, and you will have them smiling and back to themselves in no time.

3. Going out of the “comfort zone”

People who are suffering from depression often stay the course because they are constantly surrounded by all the things which bother them. They stay home alone which is no good, and keep to their regular routines, which is also no good because it is predictable and too similar to their life when they are happy. What they need to do is see something completely new to remind them that there is a world outside of their unfortunate misery.

Time to go for a trip. You need to convince your friend to come somewhere totally new with you – maybe for a surprise, or you can plan an outing. Suggestions could be new parts of the city which you haven’t seen before, new cafes or interesting plazas, or somewhere outside of town in a rural, beautiful area if you are comfortable with chatting to your friend somewhere with no distractions.

Sometimes people just need to try something new to help remind them that there are things to see and emotions to be had outside of their next at home. It may take a lot of courage and pressure to get them going, but if they come they will be able to see the light sooner than later, and that’s the most important part of being a good friend.

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