In our quest for finding effective self help remedies, we come across thousands of articles depicting simple and easy solutions for daily care, but I feel there aren’t enough that extract the emotional explanation of why we do these things. I’ve written this article here to help consider more deeply a few comfort activities that we like to do, but explaining why they are so fundamental to our self help and growth. Behind the simple titles here we have strong reasoning and evaluation. I hope you enjoy reading the behind the scenes depth of what could be some very simple habits to make your life feel simpler and more enriching.

1. Pack your lunch for tomorrow

The title is misleading because what I am trying to say is representing many things in daily life. Packing your lunch for tomorrow represents a lifestyle – the lifestyle to think ahead, to enjoy planning, to be prepared – fail to plan, plan to fail. It’s a great way to start a planning lifestyle – after all, who doesn’t like food? Start by packing your lunch for today. If you can get up a couple minutes early to get your lunch ready (and avert eating at the food court), then you’re on the right track. Then, cook ahead. Make meals for two days, buy some cheap tupperware, and pack your lunch for the next day, and the one after.

Habits like this configure your brain to usurp our early reptilian brain and let us abstract towards forward thinking patterns. When you think about tomorrow and plan your lunch you are considering your eating habits, your diet, your health; you are anticipating the weather tomorrow, your plans, etc. Everything becomes a bit more streamlined and give you the upper advantage socially and emotionally. Look forward to tomorrow – pack a lunch.

2. Turn off your wifi for one hour every day

Thank God for the internet, for it gives us so much; it makes news readily available, financial information, brings us closer to our family by letting us communicate with them at any time, assists world health services…the list is endless really! We are gifted to be living in such a technologically advanced time of the world, and it’s important not to take that for granted. After all, only eighty some years ago we didn’t have air conditioning, good phones, available flight…etc!

But as much as we should embrace our gratuitous technology, we need to object to it every now and then. We need to unplug our brain from constantly waiting to hear a notification sound or feel a vibration in our pocket. We go through the day anticipating our next reply or email, and it puts stress on our mind; it doesn’t let us fully be ourselves.

Use an opportunity every day to turn it all off and just enjoy the stillness or motion of life. Start with 20 minutes or more and go up to how you feel. You don’t have to prove yourself to everybody – just try it and see how it feels.

3. Act on your feelings

Every time you do not follow your gut instinct, you are deterring yourself from your true path. You are making a decision that is guided by other opinions, articles, excuses or filler – and you know the feeling. You know the feeling of that moment after, when you think, oh, I should have done this instead, or, ah, I should have trusted myself. You are faced with a few more moments of all the following emotions of regret, denial or mistrust as you go through this new path, and learn to deal with the consequences.

Sometimes following your gut instinct, your emotions, is very difficult. There is no rule book to life and you never know if you are making the right decision, or the best decision for you or anyone else. You just have to practice and see. Never be afraid to trust yourself and accept the consequences. You should trust your opinion and be confident in it. It is your life. Enjoy your emotions.

4. What are you grateful for?

There’s a ton of articles anywhere online that talk about writing down what you are grateful for. If you haven’t started a gratitude list, it’s never too late to start. But it goes much more than that, I think.

You can write down everything but what you must do is truly feel it throughout the day. You can be grateful for a hundred things throughout every day, or more, and there is such rare time to think about it all. It should be no problem then, to spend a few seconds everyday to recount your gratitude and feel it. A few seconds at the mirror in the bathroom, a few seconds in the car. Make it a daily ritual throughout the day, and live through it.

5. Read a small book

The world of literature has adapted to our seemingly decreasing attention span. Writers are producing pieces that are easy to read and get the point across quickly. Put down the kindle or smartphone and feel the power of paper though your fingertips. If you can spend a few minutes each day reading some valuable anecdotes through a couple of pages, you will be better for it than not. Book stores are still open for a reason – literature is powerful and the history of it is immense. Pick through the local popular options in self help, comedy, or anything you like, and learn more about the world and how you see it.

6. Call your best friend

In a world thick of texting, the fantasy of rolling around in bed laughing on the phone with your best friend is something of an era past. It’s not though. Try to make a motion with your friends to pick a sporadic time to dedicate to calling each other and have a good laugh on the phone – surely it will feel like some kind of new experience! Remember when we used to stay up all night chatting with our friends in high school? Gossip like old times and don’t worry about talking for too long. It’s a soul enriching experience.

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There are a lot of ways to live our life and we only have one chance to do it. Some people get married when they are young, some when they are old, some never; some have kids, some remain kids all their life. The best part about it all is that there is no one right way to live or another.
At any age, we are always pressed with relationship options, whether they be to seek monogamy, polygamy, marriage, or friendship. We experiment during our youth and become more down to earth as we get older and mature. In some habits, some of us might develop a fear of commitment. Maybe we don’t feel good at it, or know enough about it. Maybe we haven’t had enough opportunities to grow committed habits or relationships, and we are afraid to start. The point is, we should never be afraid to try anything new, and no matter what happens, we will always both succeed and make mistakes no matter what we do. The challenge is enjoy the changes in our life and do whatever makes you happy.
Are you scared of commitment? Take a look and try to overcome these obstacles in your love life.

1. You spend too much time looking for the “right one”

If you chase a butterfly through the field, it will run away. But if you wait for it, it will land right on your shoulder.

Romance is in the air. Or at least you think it is. As the saying above goes, sometimes if you spend too much time chasing and looking for something you want, you will never get it. Sometimes you just have to sit and be patient and wait for what you want to come to you.

Relationships and dating just isn’t what it used to be anymore. We are surrounded by dramatic stories of love and hang on to this idea, when really all we need is not “the one,” but just someone amicable that we can enjoy spending time with and see things on the same wavelength. People who are “the one” together are usually those who have been together since childhood – they’ve had every experience together and cannot live apart. If you are still looking for love into your middle age, it’s time not to look for the one, but to just wait for someone who you can enjoy the rest of your life together with, without the drama or attachment of immense love. Look for respect, honesty, and friendship.

2. Bad experiences in past relationships

Our past relationships bear a heavy burden on our lives a lot of the time, but we always try to find peace with it. We need to leave it in the past and think forward. I have seen many people either give up dating, or distance themselves from others for a long time because of a bad past relationship. But it’s important to remember that everybody is different, and a bad experience with one person is not a reflection of people as a whole. You have to put it behind you and embrace new people; learn from your experiences and choose new partners with an open, secure mind. Do not distance yourself because you have been hurt – recover with strength and look forward to starting over again. After all, you’ve done it before.

3. Bad relationship with your parents

Not all of us come from perfect nuclear families; some of us come from humble homes, broken families, or other interesting situations. It’s no reason to upset your frame of mind or use it as an excuse as to why you cannot maintain a relationship or have a family yourself. That you don’t know anything about it is also not an excuse. It is never too late to learn how to be yourself or grow your own relationship or family. We learn from our surroundings and ourselves; take what you know from your loving family and extrapolate it into your own life – it’s your life, not theirs.

4. You have too many options…or not enough

If you have been living in a big city or other metropolitan area and are young and active, monogamy might not be the problem, but polygamy might. It is indeed tempting and beneficial to meet as many people as possible – share new experiences, learn from with, learn with them, and learn lessons. But it’s no excuse to be afraid of commitment; you must learn how to follow your feelings and trust your gut when it comes to serial dating versus settling down. It feels great to enjoy the attention of many people and also becomes more complicated when drama exists. Enjoy it all while you can, and learn how to shift gears when it is the right time.

Conversely, if you’re living in a lightly populated area, the lack of choice might be a bother to you. It’s possible you know every person in your town already, and the lack of scope can be suffocating. You need to meet new people, but you can’t!
Despite those conditions, try not to limit your perspective. Your town may be small, but the world is huge. Connect with others online or make trips into the city to broaden your social network and meet others. There are millions of people out there.

5. “Friends with benefits”

Not all of us have had a lot of experience with long relationships. It could be that we travel for work, spent most of our time in school, or simply work too much to be able to grow a long lasting bond. If we are socially active, it’s easy then to just develop a pattern of seeing many people and not be able to get past that. Eventually it feels like that is the only way we can live our life and consequently we get programmed into thinking that we are a certain way. The truth is, we’re not, and habits change. We are whoever we want to be, whenever we want to be. As we get older, people might wonder why we have not had many long relationships. There is no shame in the truth, and no right way to live your life. Don’t feel ashamed to tell anyone the truth about why your life is the way it is, or sugar coat anything around it. Be you, always, and as much as you can be.

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The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.
~Nelson Mandela~

Success is seldom a straight road; it almost always involves many detours and dead ends.  It takes tenacity and determination to keep going, but those that do will eventually reach their destination.  For example, Thomas Edison failed over 1000 times but continued on despite being ridiculed by the media and those around him. What is it about those that refuse to quit long after most would have given up that makes them different?  There are a number of attributes that consistently stand out amongst those who tenaciously follow their own path in life.

Have a highly developed sense of self

People who are able to develop a strong sense of who they are and what matters to them are much better able to resist external influences that will keep many people from reaching their potential. They are able to draw strength from within and therefore less likely to be influenced by what others think of them.  This strong inner strength helps them deflect criticism, alienation, ridicule and other factors that everyone who forges their own path, inevitably faces. While they do make strong connections with others they have powerful internal filters that allows them to block out and ignore information they don’t find useful or of benefit to them. They are internally driven and believe that they are the best person to know and decide what is best for them.

Look for a positive take away from every situation

When things don’t go according to plan, resilient people look for the learning in the situation and the lesson they can take away.  They don’t view failure as final, rather a necessary learning step that will take them further along the path.  Instead of taking setbacks personally, they are seen as an inevitable part of the learning process and mentally prepare themselves to deal with them. Resilient people do not lose the lesson when they fail to achieve their objectives. They are mentally prepared for setbacks and expect the goals that they set will require a lot of time effort and therefore lose little enthusiasm or confidence when things don’t go according to plan.

Take a long term view

Resilient people are prepared for the long haul, fully realizing that anything worth achieving will be difficult and will take a great deal of time, effort and persistence.  Despite not seeing any immediate results of their efforts, they are keenly aware that what their lives will look like in the future will be determined by their efforts today.  Their strong sense of the future motivates them to take action even when they see no immediate benefit and don’t feel very motivated in the moment.

Have highly developed sense of purpose

Whether it is a belief in a higher power, a strong sense of purpose, or a great sense of humor, resilient people have sources of strength they can rely on to get them through difficult situations.  This decreases their sense to belong and rely upon others for motivation. They see their lives beyond the everyday routine and strongly feel the need to follow their own vision. Their motivation is intrinsic and they cannot be easily dissuaded from their chosen path by others.

Don’t get frightened by uncomfortable thoughts or not having the answers

Most people believe that not knowing how to do something and not being able to, are one and the same thing.  Highly resilient people don’t let not knowing how to do something stop them. They believe that they will find a way. They have faith in their ability to overcome whatever obstacles are in their path.  Expecting to find new situations uncomfortable and difficult, they are willing to accept this as part of the process.

Selective in whom they look to for guidance and inspiration

Highly resilient people don’t suffer fools.  It’s not that they never look to others for guidance and direction, it’s that they are very selective in who they chose to follow. They look for mentorship in people who have achieved greatly and whom they admire.  Once they have found the people they chose to follow, they soak up all the information, guidance and inspiration they can by reading their books and listening to their spoken messages for insight.

Find healthy ways to recharge and nurture themselves

Resilient people are no less susceptible to pressures and life’s stressors than anyone else, but they have developed healthy coping mechanisms they know can be counted on.  Whether it is meditation, exercise or an all-encompassing hobby, they have proven methods that allow them to recharge their energy and get back into pursuing their passion.  Personal growth and development for them is not a passing interest or flavor of the month, it is a way of life.

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Do you have a good eye? Maybe you should listen to your intuition… Have some fun and test your sight and not only!

Take a look at the pictures form this quiz and try to figure out which ones are fake and which one real.

Take the quiz now an find out if you can tell if these 10 pictures are real or fake!

Can You Tell If These 10 Pictures Are Real or Fake?

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Leave a comment below to tell us what you’ve got!

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Imagination is like a muscle, you have to train it in order to get the best results. How often have you train it yours?

If you spend most of your time daydreaming, I can bet your imagination is working just fine, or maybe not…

Take just now this quick and easy quiz and find out if you can pass the imagination test!

Can You Pass The Imagination Test?

 

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Leave a comment below to tell us how accurate this was!

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Even though we are all such motivated and inspired people, There are some days where it’s a struggle even just to get out of bed! I’m sure you know the feeling. It feels great to work, and it feels great to relax. Life is about balance. We need to have a nice balance between responsibility and relaxation in order to have a fulfilling life.

Our responsibilities through the week often add up to so much that we have a hard time finding time for ourselves or for our leisure activities. Sometimes the problem is not that we are too busy, but we are too distracted. We are distracted by media and laziness and even if we only have a few real responsibilities, it takes us a long time to get them done because we are disorganized. Here’s a few things you can do to help smooth out the schedule.

1. Listen to audiobooks

Hopefully you are someone that enjoys reading, learning and literature. Of course, we are all busy people and we all wish we had more time to read more, but we never seem to have enough time in our day for it. Consider all the time you have when you are doing “nothing;” that could be driving somewhere, commuting, or walking your dog. This is time you could be using to do that precious reading and studying. Through the course of a year, if you just listened to audio courses while you were doing your daily chores, you could probably learn another language by then!

2. Use a white or blackboard

If you’re not already, get on board and purchase a whiteboard for yourself. They are affordable and easy to find thanks to the rise in entrepreneurship and commerce in modern times. Place it next to your working station. Having a whiteboard around is handy when you have fleeting ideas and schedules that you need to write down right away but can’t be bothered to find a decent notepad, open it, find a working pen, and write down your ideas. Your marker will be within hand’s reach and your ideas can simply be recorded and erased as quickly as you want. You can create sections for different ideas, and get a small or large board to suit your needs.

3. Consider quality

We are busy people and our schedules often lapse our sense of quality and judgement. We are so busy trying to cram everything in that we forget to mind the finer details. At the end of the day, it is more important and rewarding to finish one thing very well, than a hundred things unsatisfactorily.

Break down your day, your schedule, and pick out the most important things. Remember you have your whole life to get everything done. Don’t make yourself feel rushed.

4. Define your priorities

Likewise, consider what are the most important things for you to do. Everyday when wake up you have a number of things to do and at the end of the day you want to make sure you feel satisfied by your accomplishments. Determine what your most important chores are, and complete them in a way that makes you feel satisfied. Do not overwhelm yourself or you will never take pleasure in your achievements.

5. Plan in advance

Take your day, your week, your month. Everyday we have an idea of what we need to do. Get that whiteboard out and start writing down your duties: try doing it weekly to start. As you go through the week, you’ll be able to cross off or push over your responsibilities and at the end of the week you can see how much or little you’ve accomplished, and what changes you need to make to succeed. Don’t set your goals too high – make sure all your ideas are digestible.

6. Schedule isolation

Sometimes that little rectangular phone in our pocket just seems to be vibrating all day. Notifications are flying in from Facebook, Email, Instagram, Twitter, or anything you’re using. You need to take a bit of white collar meditation sometimes and enjoy your alone time – no phone, no computer. Nowadays due to the speed of social media we have a constant awareness of whether we are receiving messages or not. Schedule some time for yourself where you are not focussed on your internet or phone life, and let your mind recuperate.

7. Increase your daytime hours

It’s no secret that we are much more focused during the day that not. At night time our body has been trained to feel more tired, become hungry, and get ready for bed. During the day is when our body is at maximum strength for productivity. This is keeping our body in tune with the circadian rhythm of nature. Use the most of your daylight hours to get everything done, and spend your nights unwinding, taking advantage of the evening cool.

8. Make your day longer

How about creating more sunlight hours in your day then? Studies show that people who wake up early and go to bed early are the most productive among us. It may sound like sacrilege to wake up at five, six A.M., or before the sun rises, but waking up with the sun will kickstart your day into motion for you. By the time noon rolls around you will be ready for lunch and surprised by how much you’d gotten done already! By evening time you’ll have been able to do as much as you can in a healthy way throughout the day, and you will be naturally ready for bed and ready to do it again.

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A lot of times I feel like I want to emotionally disconnect from this world. Rush home after a long day at work, shut the door and soak in a bubble bath with my headphones on – inside my own little world, far away from everything and everyone.

But you can’t live like this you tell me, this world needs selfless and caring souls who can lead others to help heal and save our planet so that humanity doesn’t end up being remembered (or forgotten) as the doomed race who destroyed itself through their selfish acts.

This all sounds good in theory but I already have difficulty coping with my own hectic life (and emotions.) I love and care for my family and friends, I think that should suffice. Besides, at the end of most days I feel drained, only wishing for an escape from all the madness. How can I possibly develop the capacity to care about the suffering of some strangers?

To care for someone who is similar to us or gives us something in return doesn’t require much efforts. The challenge is to love someone who makes you want to run away. To forgive and love others who have betrayed us. To find the strength to reach out to people even in the midst of our storms, when we rather retreat and take care of our own needs instead.

True compassion is developed when we open our hearts and regain access to our empathetic abilities, to be able to feel what the other is feeling. Real love isn’t lazy, it’s characterized by our willingness to put ourselves in the other person’s shoes. To see through their eyes when our first impulse may be to spit out our frustration at them or ignore them.

When we apply this greater understanding to our life, we are able to reflect this kind of love inside and outside of our home and truly change the world into a better place. Only then can we develop genuine love for each other that isn’t superficial and won’t evaporate as soon as frictions arise.

Life’s bitter experiences as well as our pursuit of happiness and material gains may have shrunk our sweet core to the size of a shriveled raisin. But compassion can be cultivated (psmag.com) and trained. It’s a practice. The more we practice, the more it will become part of who we are. Similarly, the less we water the seeds of altruism, the bitterer we become.

What are some ways we can expand our own empathetic potential and fully embody compassion?

1. Remember who you truly are, underneath the pride and pretenses

In the risk of sounding naive, I believe that all human beings are naturally sweet

Humans are social creatures by nature, we are hard wired to care and connect with each other.

“Over the last decade, neuroscientists have identified a 10-section “empathy circuit” in our brains which, if damaged, can curtail our ability to understand what other people are feeling. Evolutionary biologists like Frans de Waal have shown that we are social animals who have naturally evolved to care for each other, just like our primate cousins. And psychologists have revealed that we are primed for empathy by strong attachment relationships in the first two years of life.” (greatergood.berkeley.edu)

Everyone has this ability to feel empathy, as neuroscience shows, empathy is an important characteristic of the human brain. It’s what renders humans humane.

2. Let go of past hurts, it wasn’t personal

Once you accept that others couldn’t give you the love or compassion you really wanted because their heart at the time was not capable of it, you will also understand that they projected their inner conflict or suffering onto you. If you walk around with a backpack full of bricks, mad at the whole world, you won’t be able to strengthen your natural empathetic abilities.

Recall the times you treated someone unfairly. The negative you see in others also exist in you.

Similarly, turn down the volume of your negative inner voice and forgive yourself for past mistakes, they were meant to strengthen and guide you.

As you forgive yourself, you gain the ability to also forgive others, you become free of an enormous burden that weighs you down. Through forgiveness you make room for peace and love to enter in, which can only benefit you. Let it go, the choice is yours.

3. Master your emotions or they will end up controlling you

If we don’t learn to master our emotions they become a significant obstacle impeding our growth. Instead of reacting immediately to emotional triggers, take deep breaths until your heart rate returns to normal.

Know that negative emotions come and go. Don’t resist them, instead let them pass without blindly identifying with them or reacting to them. They will dissolve on their own. In hindsight you’ll be glad that you didn’t act on these feelings.

The expression blinding rage is accurate. Intense negative emotions prevent us from seeing things from an objective point of view, including our opponent’s perspective. Through the practice of mastering our emotions we discover that we are more than our anger, fear or pain.

We free our inner voice underneath our irrational thoughts. Seeing beyond our emotions, we can cut to the core of the issue. Our understanding blossoms, we tap into our empathetic awareness.

4. Remember how you’ve felt on your worst days?

Everyday, everywhere, you encounter people who feel much worst. A lot of times you wouldn’t even suspect that they do.

Most people are resilient, they rarely show their emotional or physical pain in public. Our capacity to feel hurt, sadness, loneliness and pain as well as joy and other positive feelings are our common bonds as human beings. People feeling tremendous sadness will likely choose to hide it from the world because they know that no one really cares or that they will be judged. By showing genuine kindness or interest towards them, we allow them to be seen and heard.

Through this empathetic bond, we can also remove our masks and reveal our feelings and experiences to another person in pain, creating a mutual understanding. This in turn will defuse our own feelings of loneliness, anger, and pain.

By choosing to focus on our similarities we create a deeper connection with others, can help them alleviate their pain, while bridging differences.

5. When we only care about our own little world, we lack an emotional connection to others

Living within the confines of ourselves, our problems are magnified. When we dedicate ourselves to help another person or simply lend a listening ear, our own preoccupations become less urgent. When I open my eyes to the world around me, gratitude springs up within me as I discover that my little problems are nothing compared to so many people on this planet.

6. Over the years, your ego has built up walls around your heart to protect you.

Those ice walls between yourself and others are no longer needed

To effectively manage the ego is an ongoing process. Recognize your fears or past hurts (writing them down helps) – what your ego is trying to protect you from.

Accept your own shadows and vulnerabilities. The ego can loosen its grip it has on you once you have accepted your imperfect and beautiful flawed self. Gradually let your protective walls around your heart melt.

Flip your painful experiences around and transform them into a positive testimony. You can help other learn from your new insights and may prevent them from going through what you’ve been through.

The pain you are trying so hard to run away from could be the catalyst for changing lives. By acknowledging your pain, you understand yourself better, and in turn develop compassion towards yourself and others.

If we reconnect with our true empathetic nature, we will be able to feel the suffering of others as if it were our own. In doing so, we will treat each other differently. Someone’s ethnic background, culture, or social status won’t hold much significance in our eyes; compassion will stem from a heart of understanding. The key to solving problems such as violence, inequality, abuse, and environmental destruction is to awaken our empathy already hard wired inside our brain.

In our own quest for happiness, we forget that other peoples’ wellbeing are an integral part of that happiness.

As the Dalai Lama observes, the world doesn’t need anymore successful people or new technologies. But people who are brave enough to embrace their vulnerabilities, who take active steps toward healing and recovering from their painful past, who choose to understand and forgive instead of hate. By reconnecting with our true authentic selves instead of wanting to polish our egos, we can reconnect with our empathetic abilities and heal our world. As we heal the world we also heal ourselves.

True compassion brings to an end the separation between ourselves and others. The day we stop caring about one another is the day we lose all trace of our humanity. A heartfelt gesture, whether big or small, has ripple, multiplying effects. Imagine the impact we can have if we all choose to be more compassionate and giving, starting in our own backyard.

I believe that recovering human empathy is the main solution to create a new earth as well as health and happiness for each individual. As we help others achieve happiness, we reap happiness for ourselves.

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When was the last time you had a good sweat? Exercising doesn’t mean joining an expensive gym, messing up your life schedule and buying hundreds of dollars worth of new fashion clothes. All you have to do is throw on your pyjamas and go for a fifteen minute run every now and then in the morning or night. It helps clear your mind, strengthens your bones and muscles, and has infinite long term health benefits. Check out all the great benefits just a short jog every now and then will give you.

1. Cures insomnia

Well, let’s admit it – jogging can be hard work! There’s a difference between jogging down the street in your neighbourhood and jogging through rain up a hill. The point is, there’s many forms of jogging, and at the end of the day, they are all relatively exhausting! If you are suffering from insomnia, there’s a good chance it is a way of your body telling you that you have not worked hard enough during the day. When we lay in bed at night, it is often because our days had been very slow and mundane – we have not exhausted enough energy for us to feel tired. If we develop a natural tiredness, we can fall asleep naturally and without any insomniatic aids. Try running.

2. Relieve stress

First thing that may happen when you start running is that you will be distracted – your mind will be too busy keeping you focused on the exercise. You will be in the zone. When you start sweating, something is happening to your body. It’s a great feeling to work hard and release the endorphins involved with exercise. People who regularly do fitness are much happier than those that do not. They have a regular release of toxins from their body, and the relief of stress that comes with it.

3. Slow down the effects of aging

Our bodies naturally deteriorate over time – this is no secret. Regular jogging will slow down the effects of aging by restoring bone structure and muscle growth. Your joints and tendons will be naturally re-connected to your muscles, which support the bones underneath them. We need to maintain our health as we get older to avoid the decay of our muscles. Otherwise we will be more prone to osteoporosis and arthritis.

4. Boosts confidence

Take pride when you tell your friends that you have been running! Encourage them to do the same. If you begin a jogging habit, your leg and feet muscles will feel stronger, you will have less stress and you will feel better that you are doing something good for your body – overall your confidence will increase and people will see the light in you.

5. Develop a new hobby

Jogging is a lifestyle. People who enjoy jogging read magazines, go to new stores, and will meet different people. You will start to develop to interests in jogging literature and music. You will listen to new music when you’re running and ultimately learn more about the way you think and the things you like. Every new hobby is a new step in life.

6. Balance your appetite

Perhaps you have a slow appetite and don’t eat much – or maybe you eat too much! It could all be a result of not having regular exercise. Jogging regularly will aim to balance your metabolism – you will feel hungry at essential times, and satisfied at others, instead of having an irregular diet that you may have now. You will know when and what you have to eat due to the breakdown of muscles and sweat, and you won’t have to think about when you need to eat next. It will all come naturally with balanced exercise.

7. Improve stamina

Of course the more you jog, the better you will get at it. But it will also improve your stamina in your day to day life. You will feel refreshed and more energized. You will rely on coffee less, and be more naturally stimulated to complete your day.

8. Support your cardiovascular health

Last but not least, jogging is just good for your health. It improves the function of your heart including blood circulation and lung capacity. Your organs will be healthier, and so will you as a whole. More oxygen will flow to your muscles to support your daily life, and you will be a healthier person at the end of the day. So why! It could be your favourite new hobby.

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One of the most common challenges faced by many individuals is perfectionism. I must confess that I include myself in this lot, as I have personally struggled with perfectionism for many years. I know what you might be thinking. Perfection is good. Well, to a certain point it is. But it can also be quite damaging to several areas of your life.

Perfectionism can ruin, or even prevent the creation of, lasting relationships. Living up to the expectations of a perfectionist is just too demanding for people not so inclined. Some of you on both sides already know what I’m talking about, right? It can put such a strain on the relationship that one or the other has to call it quits.

Professionally perfectionism can hold you back from getting projects finished, and irritate your co-workers to the point where they refuse to work with you. It can drain your self-esteem and put you in a negative spiral where it can become harder and harder to start moving forward.

I’ve successfully hammered my perfectionism into a manageable tool that helps me stay sharp without it getting in my way. Today I’d like to share the 6 practices that have helped me

Go for Good Enough.

A primary belief that a lot of people hold is everything they do has to be perfect before moving forward. While this may sound like a good practice, in reality it creates a barrier for most individuals. There are merits in doing the best job you can, and I’m not arguing against it.

Perfectionism, is however, a productivity nightmare. There is a reason software products have a version number attached to their name. It’s because the developers know the program only has to be good enough to put out to market. The following versions are then tweaked and perfected. Had the developer not decided to release in this manner, it’s highly unlikely it would have made it to market at all. Getting everything perfect will hold you back in the long run, so learn when to say it’s good enough.

Accept That We Are All Human

I think you’ll agree with me that being a human is great most of the time. We get to walk upright, we have brains able to envision incredible things, and we get to boast about those all-important thumbs which enabled us to rise up in the animal kingdom fairly quickly. But being human is sometimes quite difficult. We certainly aren’t perfect by any measure, and we must be willing to understand the shortcomings of others and ourselves. Instead of focusing on who owns the mistake, focus on the logical solution. Accept it, fix it, and move on.

Focus On the Process, Not Just the Result

People tend to attach the achievements or failures in life to their feelings of self-worth. When we succeed at a difficult task, we have a sense of accomplishment which boosts our ego and self-esteem. On the other hand, when the outcome is less than expected, we have negative feelings. We feel incompetent, unworthy of our goal, and we get the mental image of being an overall failure. We seem to be wired this way, but we shouldn’t look at it in this fashion.

Use Ideals as Guides, Not Absolutes

We’ve often been told to keep our eyes on our goals. This may be sound advice in some situations, however a better practice is to focus primarily on the process. Pay attention to the actions leading up the realization of the goals you’ve set. Recognize the process you’ve created to attain the goals you seek. All the planning, delegation, and the personal sweat and tears you’ve put into the journey to your goal. This is where you place your value. By doing this, worth will be attached to your process, and not to the outcome. Attaining your goal would be fantastic. But if you don’t, then you know you put in the work. You took the journey. That’s what’s important.

Increase Your Tolerance for Growth and Process by Not Judging Too Soon

Personal growth is in itself, a process. There are no overnight wonders to transform you into a more positive, productive, or responsible person. All growth, no matter what it is you’re striving for, is a process. It takes time to make the changes necessary to see tangible results. Perfectionists tend to have a low tolerance for things they perceive as taking too long.  Be patient and reserve your judgement until a fair amount of time has passed.  The lack of patience causes some to be quick to declare they’re getting no results, so they simply give up too soon. Strive to tolerate growth and develop the patience required for it to happen.

Celebrate Every Progress, Victory, and Failure

It’s so easy to celebrate a victory, but you should also celebrate the progress you make, even if it doesn’t lead to a successful ending. Making progress to your goal lets you know you’re on the right track, and tells you to make a course correction. This too, should be celebrated. Making it closer to the end goal is always good news. Our failures let us know what isn’t working. Businesses look at failures as data to be analyzed so they can take the correct actions, and not as a measure of the company’s abilities. That’s the way you should handle your failures.

Destigmatize Your Mistakes by Learning from Them

You’ve probably heard of a gentleman by the name of Thomas Edison and his famous invention, the light bulb. He failed time and time again before finally discovering the right combination of metals and gases to make a stable light bulb. He was even asked once how he felt about failing one thousand times, His response was to say he felt it was a thousand steps rather than a thousand failures.

Remove the stigma of failure from your mind by learning Edison’s lesson. He gathered new information each time his experiment didn’t work. When working toward your goal, go into it with the mindset that things may go wrong, and adjustments may need to be made. You don’t need to be perfect every time to gain eventual success.

As you can see, perfectionism can be a serious detriment to your happiness and success. My hope is that by using these tips you’ll be able to get your perfectionism under control. They made a huge difference in my life, and I fully believe they will do the same for you.

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“I realized I was more convincing to myself and to the people who were listening when I actually said what I thought, versus what I thought people wanted to hear me say.”    ~ Ursula Burns ~

In the last number of years, there seems to be quite a lot of media attention on bad leaders.  We hear a great deal about the ones who are corrupt, egotistical and motivated solely by their own gain and self-aggrandizement. Stories of employee disengagement, bullying by management and other articles around failures of leadership appear frequently. Despite our seemingly endless desire to hear about the bad leadership, most great leaders quietly giving their best for organizations and society. While not drawing attention to themselves and their achievements, these leaders are making a real positive difference with their staff, organizations and society.

Here are the 7 habits that authentic leaders continuously cultivate:

See Their Role as a Privilege and Responsibility, Not a Right

Authentic leaders see their role as one of responsibility for bringing out the best in others and doing what is best for the organization within the context of serving their community. They resist entitlement and seeing themselves as special people ordained with special powers and privileges. While others give in to the urge to use their power, authentic leaders are in the habit of making themselves constantly aware of the responsibilities their position’s place them in. They are truly grateful for the chance to serve others and are always looking for ways to help others advance.

Develop Their Courage and Self-Confidence

Doing what is right, rather than what is popular, takes courage and a belief in oneself and one’s abilities.  Authentic leaders know that their decisions will not always be popular and they will be required at times to stand up and defend their beliefs and decisions. They are prepared to do this, believing it is more important to do what is right rather than what is easiest or the most popular. While they face fears and self-doubt like everyone else, they understand the need to push past them in order to grow.

Show Their True Self to Everyone

The reason genuine leaders earn trust and respect is that everyone around them knows that what you see is what you get. The janitor is treated with the same respect as those they are doing business with and those that they report to. Their wives, husbands, families and friends see the same person as do all the people they work with.  They are comfortable in their own skin and see no need for feigning or ego stroking.

Acknowledge Their Imperfections and Mistakes

Genuine leaders see others as struggling humans trying to do their best and are willing to give themselves leeway in their own journey of life. They are willing to admit their mistakes and are willing to accept they will never be perfect. Their aim to learn from their mistakes, take the lessons and move on.  Those who report to genuine leaders will be more confident in pushing their own boundaries and making mistakes in the process.  Creativity and innovation will flow in an organization in which leaders are making and acknowledging their own mistakes and encourage their followers to do the same.

Develop Their Emotional Intelligence

The most important knowledge, of any leader, is self-awareness. Genuine leaders are continually growing and developing knowledge of themselves. They see this as essential for building stronger relationships with others and helping them reach their potential. Personal development is seen as a lifelong journey and developing the leadership in others is seen as being an important component of not only their leadership, but their life’s work. Instead of avoiding challenges they look upon them as essential to their growth and development. They see every challenge as an opportunity to boost their own capabilities and growth opportunities, not only as leaders but as human beings.

Treat Others With Empathy and Respect

We all have preferences when dealing with others; some we like and others just seem to bring out the worst in us. Genuine leaders are aware enough to know when someone is pushing their triggers and attempt to treat everyone reasonably and respectfully. They make a real effort to treat everyone fairly regardless of their personal feelings towards them.  They are never beyond sincerely apologizing to anyone if they realize later that they have acted rudely or disrespectfully towards them.

Always Looking For Ways to Give Back

Whether it is flipping burgers at the company barbecue or coaching little league slow pitch, authentic leaders are the first ones to avail themselves to the service of their organization and community. They see themselves and their roles as part of the bigger picture and look for these opportunities to share their skills and knowledge with those around them.  While some might view this as a burden, genuine leaders see recompensing as a privilege and an opportunity to give back as a form of gratitude for what they have received in life.

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