Our personality evolves based on our experiences. Life can change us in unpredictable ways. But we have some basic character traits that will stay the same no matter what. We were born with those.

The moment of our birth can predict some of these personality traits. It’s not for nothing that our horoscopes are calculated based on the exact moment of our birth.

Take just now this quick and easy quiz and find out what your birth date says about your personality.

What Does Your Birth Date Say About Your Personality?

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Leave a comment below to tell us what you’ve got!

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Social butterflies listen up. As much as it is super fun to be around people all the time it is actually very important and quite beneficial to spend a little time alone, with just you. That’s all. You. Some of us are actually afraid to be alone. We don’t like it one bit. Others prefer to be alone, hello introverts, and get slightly annoyed by people and having to spend time with people. Spending time alone, however, is very good for you.

Human interaction is very healthy for us all. We connect, we learn, we grow and we form healthy bonds and relationships. But too much of a good thing can be bad. Here are a few reasons why you should be spending more time alone.

Get to know you.

Do you know who you are, I mean who you really are? when we take time to be alone with our own thoughts, we are often surprised by the things we think, the things we realize we love and the things we don’t want in our lives. Spend some time with you and fall in love with you. For the first time, or again.

Confidence boost.

When you can spend time alone and enjoy it, you have reached a nice confidence level. You don’t need to be around people to feel special, wanted or validated. You can do all that yourself. Kudos to you. Many people feel very uncomfortable being alone. Almost lost. Start slow and get used to it. Soon you will love it and crave it.

Hello productivity.

Look at all the stuff you got done. Way to go. You know you wouldn’t have done one quarter of that if you were still sipping wine with your best friends. Have a to do list or a bucket list? You’ll start knocking it off faster if you spend more time alone. Being alone can be very inspiring and somewhat motivating when it comes to doing things for you. Things you’ve been putting off.

Learn something new.

Feel like taking an online course or going to a free class at the library? Ok so maybe the library thing isn’t alone time but you will be with new people, not your usual crew and you are there to learn something new. If you start hanging out with yourself more and sign up to classes and courses that you’ve always wanted to take you may soon discover a hidden passion or talent. Try it.

Good bye stress.

Do you ever find that sometimes when you hang out with all your friends you come home feeling slightly frazzled? Maybe someone said something that was a trigger. Maybe there was too much negative energy in the room that night. Whatever the case may be, you come home and your nerves are shot. You feel a little stressed out. You are also seeing that this happens more often than not. Time to start taking time for yourself. give your mind, and your nerves, a break.

Meditation time.

Make room in your schedule for this. Seriously. This practice demands you to be alone and be quiet. Just you, your thoughts and some nice Zen music. When you start doing this more soon you will notice the difference in your day and mood if you skip a day of meditation. It puts you in a beautiful state of aloneness, oneness, be in the present. In time, a very short time for some, you will see how much more relaxed you are throughout your daily life. Not too much gets on your nerves anymore.

Independence is where it’s at.

Do you have a habit of needing to be around people to feel like part of a tribe, a group or one of the gang? That’s ok, many of us do. Start hanging out alone and be part of your own tribe. Feel independent and learn to love your group. Once you start getting accustomed to it, it won’t be long before you head out for dinner alone, movies or even a road trip.

Clear the cobwebs.

Our brains get cluttered, sort of like our houses, and every now and then, need to be cleansed. The only way to do this is to shut it off. Well not completely of course but it is possible to shut it down from the dirty noise of others voices and outside activities. Take some time alone and be with your own thoughts, your own mind, some nice music and Zen out. Make room for new thoughts, clean out the old ones that serve no purpose anymore.

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Psychopathy is a personality disorder characterized by a lack of empathy for others. How much do we care about the others? It’s hard to say exactly. That’s why the true assessment should not be undertaken lightly and can only be done a trained professional.

But, we can catch a glimpse of our minds with some easier tests. All we have to do is to answer with honesty.

Take now this quick and easy quiz and find out if you can pass the psychopath test!

Can You Pass The Psychopath Test?

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Leave a comment below to tell us what you’ve got!

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The L word. Lie. No one wants to ever be lied to yet at some point in our lives we all have either lied (yes we all have) or been lied to. It sucks. Plain and simple. Of course, our first immediate reaction is anger. It irritates us to no end that this person thinks we are stupid enough to lie to. It insults our intelligence and it seriously does hurt our feelings too.

There are many things we should and shouldn’t do when we’ve been lied to but here are a few tips that may help you next time it happens. Try one or two and see if it helps make a difference in the way you feel after the fact. Quite possibly, the liar may even get the hint and stop lying, a little.

Don’t tell the town about it.

That’s gossiping and that doesn’t make you any better. Whatever reason this person lied to you about surely can be justified by them, but definitely don’t go all over town and bash them. Two wrongs don’t make a right. There is no doubt about the fact that what they did was wrong. The whole town doesn’t need to know about it though. Really.

Don’t “lie” back.

What’s the point behind that anyway? There is no reasoning and it just makes you look like a child. We’re adults now and there is an adult and mature way to handle situations. Revenge isn’t one of them nor a recommended one. Suddenly you are both liars. There is nothing to gain from this behaviour.

Do be patient.

Talk to this person calmly and find out why they felt the need to lie to you. where does this lie come from? Is it from a fear or insecurity? If it not their normal behaviour, then clearly something is up. Assure them that they don’t need to lie about anything and everything has a resolve. Help them to understand that telling the truth is just so much better.

Do forgive.

Oh yes, this is a hard one but it is necessary. Forgiveness will set you free from the hurt and anger you feel towards this person for the lie. Maybe you won’t ever know the reason they lied to you and feel the need to lie to you all the time. just forgive them and let them go. If this person has a habit of lying to you all the time maybe it’s time to start distancing yourself from them.

Do step back.

Regroup and evaluate your relationship with this person. Is this lying a constant thing? Maybe it’s time to get rid of them. Release them from your life so you can make room for something better. It’s hard to always be in the company of someone who lies to you all the time. there is no trust and where there is no trust, there is no love, security or friendship. Time to let go.

Don’t hold a grudge.

Holding a grudge will only hurt you, not them. It’s like that quote “holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. They won’t, but your spirit and your soul will. grudges are not healthy emotionally or physically. When you fill your mind and heart with anger like that, you are taking up room where there could be love and happiness.

Do cry and be angry but don’t hang on to it.

It’s ok to let your feelings and emotions out about this latest lie, just don’t stay there too long. Definitely don’t hold it in and pretend you didn’t notice. This will brew and boil inside of you, sort of like a grudge and resentment. Write a truth letter to this person and let them know how this made you feel. Get it all out and then destroy the letter. This will definitely make you feel better. Trust me.

Do you have any tips or tricks on how to appropriately handle someone who has just lied to you? it’s never fun and it’s never easy to deal with but it can be handled effectively and maturely.

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I get it.

You want to live life without regrets.

Your biggest fear is waking up in a month, a year, or a decade and realizing you’ve wasted your time on the wrong things.

You’re scared because you don’t want to learn life’s lessons the hard way.

You don’t want to throw away years of your life struggling, only to discover the truth when it’s too late.

Learn these seven life lessons now and could save yourself years.

1. Trying to be perfect leads to failure

Everyone strives to become a better person and live a happier life.

Many of the paths we take lead to fulfillment. But one of the most common paths leads straight to dissatisfaction: the pursuit of perfection.

The simple fact is that perfection is impossible to attain, and the harder you work to achieve it, the further away you’ll feel.

The pursuit of perfection is why so many of the world’s greatest artists, athletes, and achievers live in a constant state of misery. Year after year, they delude themselves that the next achievement will bring perfection.

But once they get there, those people don’t feel perfect. So they set a new standard, and the cycle continues. It’s even worse when they base their plans on the future—but more on that later.

Don’t live your life in search of perfection. It will never come.

Instead, be content with the journey of continual growth.

2. The little things are the most memorable

As humans, we are terrible at buying memories for ourselves.

Think back to the five most vivid, pleasant memories you have. I can almost guarantee at least four of them were completely free.

Stop wasting money each year trying to make yourself happy. With time, you will forget the excessive entertainment, elaborate trips, and newer and shinier things. Those items rarely make it to our list of top memories.

The best memories are the morning we burned the expensive brunch, laughed about it, and ate cereal instead. The holiday cruise fades away, but we never forget how our six-year-old packed his suitcase full of toy cars. We don’t remember the brand of the giant TV, but we remember when it broke and we played games all evening instead.

Stop spending money on memories that don’t last. If you clutter your life with artificial experiences, you’ll waste time you should spend on the little things.

3. Your to-do list is infinite

How many times have you tried to finish everything on your to-do list?

In a surge of motivation, you power through the first two or three, or maybe even make it through a dozen or more. As you work, though, you realize that each job you complete adds a few more.

The simple fact is that there will always be something else to do. There will always be another project to work on, skill to develop, or plan to improve.

Don’t throw away your life chasing after the next task on your to-do list. The more you do, the more you have to do.

Instead, set boundaries. Working is fine, but earning a paycheck is not the purpose of your life.

Don’t waste your life doing things, without focusing on the things worth doing.

4. Someone will always be “better” than you

If you define success as competing against others, there will always be someone to beat.

No matter how great you become, there will always be something you think is “better” than you. In truth, that person isn’t better.

That person may have achieved more success in one area, but if you were to switch with them for just a day, you would realize they are far from flawless.

Someone else will always be smarter, richer, healthier, or stronger than you. No matter what you achieve, there will always be another competitor.

And when you focus on others, you forget about your accomplishments.

Instead, stop competing against others and focus on your improvement. Compete against your former self.

When you are better today than you were yesterday, you will thank yourself tomorrow.

5. You can’t predict the future

You know you can’t predict the future. But I bet you still believe it in your heart.

Every day, millions of people guess what’s going to happen. “Experts” tell us their predictions, friends gossip about what will happen to others, we plan our life a few hours or weeks or years from now.

But we are all wrong. Nobody can predict the future.

While it’s not a good idea to give up preparation entirely, it’s worse to expect the future to go as planned.

You didn’t predict any of the devastating life circumstances you’ve encountered. If you had, they wouldn’t be devastating!

Instead, be flexible. Understand that time moves on, whether you are ready or not. Be willing to change if it’s needed.

Plan for the changing future, but be willing to change your future plan.

6. People are the best part of life

Too often we avoid people, only to wish later that we had spent time with them while we could.

We delay getting together with an old friend because we have too much work. We tell the family not to interrupt while we’re watching our favorite TV show. We attend an event and squander the opportunity to meet new friends because we’re focused on the activities and not the people around us.

But nobody on their death bed ever said, “I wish I had focused a little less on people.”

When the end of our life draws near, what we will remember is not the work we did, or the TV shows we watched, or the events we attended.

We will remember the people around us. The people we should have helped more. The people with whom we should have been more vulnerable.

Instead, focus now on people. There will always be plenty to do and see. But a person may disappear from your life forever without warning.

Don’t forget now the people you won’t forget later.

7. The best time to live your dream is right now

Don’t wait for the perfect moment to live your dream. Just like you’ll never be perfect, the time will never be just right. Whatever you want to do, start it now.

Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow might be too late.

Sure, your dreams will be difficult to accomplish now. But they won’t be any easier in the future—and you might not be able to do them at all.

In a year, you will wish you had started today.

If you’ve always wanted to see the world, why are you staring at a screen reading this article? If you’ve always wanted to start your own business, learn how to write, or build the body of your dreams, what are you waiting for?

All those things are hard now, but they are doable. Tomorrow they may be impossible.

What are you waiting for?

Your life is moving on, with or without you.

Are you making steps toward a happier future, or are you hurtling towards regret?

Take action. Add a small step in your morning routine so you will do it every day.

And if you already know one or more of these life lessons? Pass on the wisdom. Share the lessons with someone who hasn’t learned them yet.

Your moment is now.

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It is amazing the quantity of information our brains can store. Sometimes this info just lies around, never put to use. But from time to time, it can come handy. This is one of those moments. Even if it’s only a game you should accept the challenge and put your memory to work.

Let’s have some fun and see if you can win the title: Master of all knowledge.

Take now this quick and fun quiz and find out if you know to much!

Do You Know Too Much?

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Leave a comment below to tell us what you’ve got!

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Let’s face it. Life is fast and furious. So many things going on all day every day. Kids, work, TV, drama, friends, appliance or car breakdown, relationship issues, the list goes on and on. When does it stop or slow down? Before you know it, another month has escaped you and you have no idea what you did or if you even enjoyed it. Your stress levels just reached an all time high again as you flip the calendar. Another month of go go go.

So many of us operate at this ridiculous speed and forget to slow down. We feel that if we go like a mad hatter we get more accomplished and feel somewhat victorious. All at a high cost. Our mental and physical health and exhaustion. It’s very important to take some time throughout the day and just chill out. If you don’t know how to do that or still struggle, here are 6 simple ways to Zen out.

Turn it off.

All of it. Phones, computer monitor, iPad and every other electronic gadget you are attached to. Shut it down. Take 5 minutes to sit quietly with no outside distractions. No emails, no bosses calling (they can call back), and close your eyes. If you happen to have a really fantastic view from your window, look outside. Breath in the silence, take it all in and enjoy it. You’ll see 5 minutes may turn to 10.

Breathe.

In and out. Many times. Slowly and easily. Once you have unplugged or if you are sitting after work in your favourite chair, take a few moments to be in the present, and breathe. From here you can breathe in good energy and blow out all the events from the day. All the triggers and stressors. Get rid of them. this may take some practice but getting it right isn’t important, doing it is. You will eventually find a groove that resonates with you.

Talk to yourself.

Use your words to calm yourself down. Who cares if anyone is listening? It’s your Zen time and you need to chill out. So tell yourself it’s time to calm down. Tell yourself that all that craziness going on in your head right now needs to stop, if only for 5 or 10 minutes. If you prefer to whisper to yourself, that’s great too. the softness of your voice will quickly calm you down. Want to shout instead? That will surely snap you out of busy-ness and put you into a forced state of calm. Perfect.

Maestro, music please.

Dig out that classical cd and tune into it for a few minutes. Train your brain and ears to listen to the softness and calmness of it. After a few minutes it will naturally listen. Take it in. The piano, the flute, tune into each instrument and revel in its beauty. If there is other music that does this for you, then put that on but no lyrics, only instrumental. No distracting words.

Put the kettle on.

For some people, just putting on a pot of boiling water for tea is calming all in itself. Just knowing that in two minutes you will be sipping a nice steamy mug of herbal (yes herbal) tea instantly calms our minds. There is just something about herbal tea. Make it chamomile or a light vanilla flavour. The aroma will soothe your frazzled nerves in seconds.

Hello couch.

When was the last time you plopped your arse on the couch with no TV on, no cell phone, soft music and a nice mug of herbal tea? All sounds extremely therapeutic to me. Have a favourite cozy chair with a pillow and a blanket? Go chill out there for a few minutes. Schedule this on to your daily planner and do it. Make time for you. Make an appointment to do this like you would a doctor’s appointment. And stick to it.

Make more time for you so you can be a better version of you for the real world and everyone else in it. You can’t pour from an empty cup and if you run yourself to the ground, you’re done. Take time for you. You deserve it.

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I don’t think there are many people who are not familiar with this movie. Every adult from my generation was once a child/teenager who had dreamed to be a Star Wars character.

Let’s see what the way you make decisions and the way you perceive the reality are telling about your personality. And which Star Wars character and personality type you match up with.

Take now this quick and easy quiz and find out what is your Star Wars personality type!

What Is Your Star Wars Personality Type?

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Leave a comment below to tell us what you’ve got!

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You eat healthy, you get to the gym when you can, you live a relatively balanced life. Or so it seems. You try to do everything according to the experts on the internet, yet something still isn’t right.  You wish you had the energy and vitality of your best friend. You have no clue what happened to your sex drive. These are only two of the signs that are in your face telling you it’s time to take care of you, but you keep ignoring them.

I don’t have time for….How many of you say this almost every day. There’s no time. I’m too busy. When can I possibly fit that in. If you find yourself saying this more often than not, then it’s definitely time for you to take heed and start taking care of yourself. Here are a few other signs. See if you recognize yourself in any of them. If you do, well, you know.

Lashing out all the time.

Are you guilty of this? Do you find you are always lashing out at your friends and/or family members? This is a clear sign you have reached your breaking point. You’re done. There’s no more room inside of you and you are boiling over. When we have too much going on inside, everything is a trigger to an emotional outburst. It’s time to put you first.

So tired.

All the time. You are overworked, stressed out, running around like a headless chicken and by midday you are pooched. Then you still have the last half of the day to endure. By nightfall, you are asleep before your head even hits the pillow. The next day it’s rinse and repeat. Time to check that calendar of yours and start making some room for you. A chill out time. You are in desperate need.

Unexplainable weight loss or gain.

This will happen if you are too busy to eat right or too busy to eat at all. It’s possible, however, that this could be caused by a more serious underlying medical condition but once the doctor does rule this out, then it’s a clear sign it’s time to take care of you. Eat right, eat often but be balanced. Your body is freaking out and wants and needs more stability and more a balanced diet. Remember our body runs on fuel and that fuel is food. Bad fuel, bad conditions.

Oops I forgot.

Again. You are getting way too forgetful these days. Why? Because you aren’t taking the time to take in important tasks, like taking care of yourself and your day is too full with taking care of everything else. The end result is forgetting things. Sometimes very important things. take time for you but maybe get a little recorder or a note pad and start jotting things down. On that list, make sure to pencil in time for you.

So much clutter.

Your house is a mess. Plain and simple. Dishes are piled high, laundry has been neglected, and what’s that smell coming out of the fridge? You simply don’t have time to look after your things. Be careful here though. The more cluttered your physical world is, the more cluttered your emotional world will be as well. Take a day or even an hour or two and start cleaning up your space. Once it is done, you will feel a million times better.

Don’t cry!

Are those emotional outbursts you are having often followed by tears? Many tears? Do you find yourself just crying for no reason and wonder why you are such an emotional disaster? It’s time to have a me day. You are tapped out. Boiled over, breaking point exploded and you are done. Find some time for you, just you and do it at least twice a week, more if you can. It’s time.

We get so busy in our lives trying to please everyone we often forget ourselves but remember, you are the most important of them all. Really.

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We all have an inner Scarecrow, Tinman and Lion – you know that, right? Half way through My Year of TED, I realised that The Wonderful Wizard of Oz is the ultimate metaphor for life – and for any self-development process. For me, it aligned perfectly with my year-long project to implement the wisdom of TED Talks into my life.

Many activities in that project were designed to improve my ability to be more connected and compassionate to others. I realised that required me to finally acquire a capacity for self-compassion, or at least quieting my inner critic. I’m sure you know the pain of a nasty inner critic – so many of us have one.

Below are the key lessons about finding my heart and self-compassion – or engaging my inner tinman to stick with the metaphor:

Be kind to yourself first

If you are incapable of self-kindness, how do you think you can be kind to others. Learn to take control of the inner dialogue that chatters about how you aren’t enough – it will change your life if you can reduce that by even a small amount.

Take time for reflection

A lot is made about the importance of gratitude, and I think that daily gratitudes are powerful for achieving more joy in your life. But I think this can be extended more broadly to allowing time in your day for reflection. What went well? What did you achieve? What did you get wrong? How would you do that better in future? Reflection helps you remember the good, and take ownership of the learning experiences.

Remember the good things

As well as regularly reflecting on your achievements and the good things in your life, it will help to keep some lists or placeholders. A list of your career achievements is a great tool for job applications, performance reviews and salary negotiations – as well as a way to remember all of the things you’ve done well, when your inner critic is trying to convince you otherwise.

Understand your values

During My Year of TED, I realised the main reason I left almost every job I’ve ever had was the organisation conflicted with my values. I’d never understood this, because I’d never consciously articulated my personal values. When they are in conflict it causes this inner disharmony that you can’t fully identify, but will destroy your contentment and fulfilment.

Know what success looks like for you

This is much like your values; when you know what success looks like for you, then you can make choices that align to where you truly want to be. It will reduce disharmony and dissatisfaction, which you might be finding it hard to identify. It also reduces that horrible habit we have of envying others, and judging ourselves against their achievements.

Be more open to others

If I didn’t mention Brené Brown in here somewhere you’d know there was something wrong. Her two TED Talks were the basis for 30 days of Vulnerability in My Year of TED after all. Embrace your vulnerability and allow yourself to truly connect with other people. If you’re hiding that heart of yours inside your impenetrable exterior (like the Tinman), how you can expect to form real connections with others. I know it’s scary, but it’s so worthwhile.

Embrace the melancholic or sad moments

You’ll notice I haven’t mentioned happy once in this piece. Not because I dislike happiness, but because that has little to do with your heart. I also think it’s something we shouldn’t strive for, but that’s a whole other blog post. As part of learning the skill of self-compassion, I discovered that it was important to embrace all of the emotions. Melancholy and sadness have a place in our lives, just don’t set up camp in those emotions permanently. Honestly, there is a great kindness in embracing these emotions – who doesn’t love a good cry every now and then?

I learned a lot about how to finally embrace self-compassion in my life. Possibly the greatest gift My Year of TED gave me was taming my inner critic. By having a greater awareness and appreciation of these parts of your life, you too will be able to have greater compassion and connection with those people around you.

By following some of these simple lessons, you can open up that Tinman chest and allow yourself to discover your own heart – then share it with others.

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