This a great quiz to help you find out how visually perceptive you are to the tiniest of details and find out how OCD you might be.
Can you spot the tiniest of detail changes in this quiz?
Let me know how you get on with it.
How Sensitive Is Your OCD Radar?
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Winter is coming around the corner and everyone is getting excited to start booking their holiday escapes. As the winter winds come in and the snow starts building up, we all want to disappear and spend our days kicking up our feet on the beach; but we don’t have to wait for winter to unwind, or spend thousands of dollars on expensive vacations. Here’s a few things we can do that feel great year round, and don’t cost us too much (or any!) money. Enjoy.
If you have the time, try getting out to a local lookout point and watching the sun set, either alone or with a friend or special person. Don’t take your phone out; just meditate in the moment. Watch the silhouettes of the trees, feel the change in the air, gaze out into the world as the sun goes down and the moon shows up – find peace. It will be a moment alone, maybe somewhere new, with undisturbed beauty. Likewise, if you can get up to watch the sun rise, another epiphany may be upon you; feel good that you’ve taken the time to watch the spectacle of a new day, and think of all the great things a new day means for you.
If you’re lucky enough to have a local nature park or reserve nearby, (perhaps even a central park), take a bit of bread or nuts and go out with a friend or relative to feed the animals. Imagine it’s a nice, sunny day and you have a couple of tiny chipmunks stuffing peanuts into their face right out of your hand. When we play with dogs we have an interaction with them that feels very humanlike – they can understand us and feel our energy. But so can the wild animals that are around us everyday. There’s an interesting and friendly energy about becoming in tune with wild local animals that we don’t get too often. Take the time to find it.
We have to be reserved these days, given our close proximity living quarters and having to uphold social qualities. But don’t you just feel like screaming out loud sometimes? It doesn’t have to be out of anger or frustration – it could be joy, or success! Well then, let’s do it. Where do you like to sing loudest? If you have a house you might be able to enjoy a quick shower concert, but if you’re stuck in an apartment with thin walls, that luxury may not be so present. Try getting in a car and singing to your heart’s content, or going out for a karaoke night. Singing releases endorphins in our brain that make us feel good. So don’t be shy – let it out!
If you need to relax, there’s a good chance something is on your mind. Getting together with someone to talk and tell stories can get our mind off things, or help us put the matter of contention at rest. Talking to someone you confide in helps us deal with our issues and grow a stronger connection with others. We get to laugh, relax, feel good, and share common ground with someone else. We discover that our problems are pretty much universal, and nothing to worry about.
When was the last time you heard absolute silence, or just the sounds of the natural world around you? It’s not something that we get the privilege of listening to too often, thanks to the fact that we live in such large cities and mostly in human clusters. We are busy listening to cars, phone chatter and shopping malls. Try to go for a nice walk around a local park or natural area and take in all the sounds of the different birds, animals and winds. Let your mind clear out and find peace where you otherwise couldn’t find it.
Who needs to spend thousands of dollars on a vacation to a sunny place when you can replicate it at home? We love the beach and sun, which we might not have at home, but something else we love is the feeling of free floating in water. Check online or through your friends for local listings and try to track down a nice swimming pool nearby your home or community. Go with some friends and have fun with it – you’ll forget all your worries when you’re free floating in the nice water, eyes closed, troubles drifting away.
Smiling is maybe something we take for granted, but it’s something we should all practice more often. You should get out of bed with a smile on your face and go to bed with one too – start and end the day fresh. If you can get into the habit of being able to smile at yourself and laugh at leisure, you will be unstoppable. Smiling is attractive and powerful – it makes everyone around you feel good, yourself included.
This is particularly stated for people in places with heavy winters. The sun has retired for months and we all hibernate in what seems like year round darkness. People who live in these climates experience a high lack of Vitamin D due to the absence of the sun, and seasonal affective disorder starts kicking in, sending many people spiralling through depression. Combat this with a short tanning session at a local salon every now and then. It aims to replicate the same feeling that being in the sun gives us, and will steer you towards a better mood.
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When I was a wee little tot, my mom and I were homeless. We were sitting on a sidewalk dirty and hungry and she was having a terrible time while I was giggling at my “spaceship stick,” waving it through the cold, rainy air.
With tears in her eyes, she jokingly says to me, “how can you be so happy?” I drop my stick, look over at her, and say, very matter-of-factly, “because it just feels better, mom.”
The state of your livelihood is all a matter of your state of mind. Having little to do with outside circumstances and everything to do with how you perceive and look at the world around you. Your world, literally, is what you make it up to be.
Here, I will share 5 simple ways to change your mind and get much more out of life starting today.
Our eyes act more like projectors, then lookers. Many would argue (including more and more emerging scientists), that the images we hold in our minds act as “pre-matter” for what’s to be materialized in the world outside of ourselves.
When we imagine, in our mind’s eye, what we want to create and manifest in our lives, our images work as cogs in a reality machine, creating these images in real life.
Have you ever had a wish come true, to find out that maybe it wasn’t exactly what you wanted, and you didn’t feel as great as you thought you would after having received it?
Sometimes we are unaware of what will make us the absolute happiest. For that, I suggest that while visualizing, visualize positive, happy emotions, rather than specific events.
Imagine yourself yelling and throwing your arms in the air in celebration, dancing in a bright light, or being confident and filled with joy.
To crank it up a notch, don’t just visualize, FEEL. Put yourself so much in the state of mind that you begin to feel the feelings associated with your visualizations. Joy, clarity, confidence, abundance, whatever it is.
The more you can feel the emotions, the quicker they will be manifested into your life. Plus, doesn’t feeling good emotions feel good, anyways? Emotions are powerful.
An important thing to note is to not over-do it. Don’t spend your entire day visualizing and thinking about the future. By doing this, you could easily be missing out on your present life and taking it for granted, forgetting what you already have to be happy and feel good about.
Sometimes our perception is skewed and we can easily fall into negative mindsets that literally block out all the beauty around us. Have you noticed the difference between when you are walking down the street on a day you feel bad, as opposed to on a day you feel good?
When you feel good, you see so much more beauty around you. The plants are more vibrant. The sky is saturated. The people are smiling. The birds are chirping.
The street you walk down is the same street, either way, it doesn’t have to change to be made into a better street. The first step to make the street a better street is to change your mindset about the street.
Make a list, mental or physical, of all the things to appreciate about you, your life, and those around you. You can even begin as simply as being grateful for your eyes, for giving you the miraculous gift of sight.
The more you bring awareness to the beauty of what is already all around you, the more beauty will be generated into your life.
I oftentimes think of my death bed (a daring thought, I know), and when I do, I can only think about what type of life I will look back on. What kind of story do I wish to tell? What type of life will I wish to have lived? What Natasha will I have wanted to be?
It’s important to keep this in mind, and what’s even more important to think about, as daunting as it is, is that you have no idea when you will be laying there, reflecting on your life.
We are not promised to live to any certain age. After all, when we die all of our material things go to someone else (or the dump). So the only things that are truly ours are the memories we have and the stories we have to tell.
So start living and creating your story, right now. Take the road trip, talk to the girl, take the leap.
Rather than looking at your troubles as tormentors, look at them as lessons. What am I learning from this? What is it teaching me? In what ways am I growing? For example, instead of getting upset at the long line in the post office, look at the line as a teacher of patience.
Suffering is only suffering if it is unjustified. If your muscles are sore and burning because you are at the gym, you might not perceive this experience as suffering because you know that the pain means you are growing.
We can use this as a metaphor for the fact that any time we are uncomfortable, it means that we are growing. If you can justify your suffering (i.e., gain something from the experience), all of the sudden it transforms into an opportunity for growth.
Our journey here on Earth is not to suffer, but to learn and grow.
The difference between pleasure and happiness is one of the most valuable distinctions I have ever made in my life. Pleasure, on one hand, comes from things outside of yourself, and the feeling is constantly fleeting. You are always having to fill yourself with these outside things to keep feeling good.
For example, driving a nice car, watching an exciting movie, or eating a delicious meal. All of these things feel good, in the moment.
Many people trick themselves into believing that they are happy because they fit the socially constructed profile of “having it all.” A nice house, a successful job, steady income, fancy car, big screen TV, you name it.
Happiness, on the other hand, is a state of mind. It’s a constant, independent of outside variables. The oh-too-common phrase, “things that make us happy,” should very well be replaced by, “thoughts that make us happy, or, perspectives, or states of mind, that make us happy.”
Happiness is a choice, and something we must experience from the inside out in order to experience it at all.
The quickest, most-powerful, and most cost-effective way to start getting more out of your life, right now, is to simply change your mind.
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“Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.” ~ Helen Keller ~
One of the basic attributes of any successful person, is their high level of optimism. This is one of the main drivers of all winning and high achieving people. Without some degree of optimism, we would never try anything new and our lives would remain perpetually stuck in the same place. All the advances and achievements in history have been fuelled by a sense of optimism. Besides, being optimistic just helps our lives to be more fulfilling, enjoyable and fun. While some people believe optimism is something we are born with, we do have control over our thoughts and actions and therefore create our own level of optimism.
Here are 7 ways we can boost our level of optimism.
We know that our subconscious mind will go over the last thoughts we had before going to sleep. Spend a few minutes thinking about everything that went right and that you enjoyed during the day just before going to sleep to program positive thoughts and images into our minds for the night. This will allow us to have a better sleep and awake more positively to face the day.
As soon as you wake up, begin thinking about what you want to accomplish with the expectation that it will happen. Visualize yourself at the end of the day having achieved everything, or more than you had planned to do. Spend a couple of minutes repeating your long term goals, purpose or life mission to yourself. Visualize yourself already having achieved these goals.
Look at life and success as a marathon; built upon continuous small wins and improvements. Look over your day and make a mental note of achievements, learned and improved. Write them down or tell yourself while looking in the mirror. This will not only build self-confidence but make it more natural to think of things that have gone well during the day.
Successful, optimistic people never forget what they have to be grateful for. While striving to reach our goals and achieve more, it is important that we are grateful for what we have in the present. I keep a gratitude book in which I write in at least 10 things that I am grateful for before beginning my day. This ensures that I start the day in a positive frame of mind and gives me comfort, knowing that I have a wonderful base to be working from each and every day.
In any situation, problem or difficulty we have a choice of where we focus our thoughts and efforts. Optimists don’t waste time looking for who to blame, or commiserating on the problem. Instead they focus on the solution and look for ways to improve the situation. They look at failures as lessons to be learned that will help them avoid or overcome the same circumstance in the future.
Optimistic people don’t have the time, energy or inclination to spend being around naysayers and negative people. They realize these people will only drain their energy so avoid them as much as possible and find other positive, motivated people to surround themselves with and bounce ideas off of. Being optimistic will attract other optimistic, success oriented people who in turn will support us, our ideas and continue to boost our optimism. It is common for successful people to be in a mastermind group to support each other in reaching goals. Find one to join, or set one up.
Being optimistic lets us believe that the future will be even better than the past and we look forward to it with excitement and anticipation. People like Peter Drucker, who lived into his 90’s, made it a goal to learn one new thing every year. One year he learned to speak Japanese. Not only does learning support us to be more optimistic, it keeps our mind active and open to new possibilities and opportunities.
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We all know that in order to live and function we have to nourish our body, so that it is supplied with energy that can make it function. We know that if we do not feed our body, we will eventually perish. Our whole experience of life depends on having a body that is well nourished, because if it is not, then our experience will become less than perfect, and we will get weak or ill. We cannot experience life to the full unless we give our body the best nourishment, and a lot of us are concerned with what we eat. We strive to eat healthy things that will nourish us in the best possible way, and we try to avoid things that we know are not good for us, such as sugar, saturated and trans fats, refined carbohydrates, red meat, alcohol, tobacco etc. Our knowledge about what kind of food we should put into our bodies is quite substantial, and a lot of research has been carried out in this field. We strive to get enough vitamins and the right balance of carbohydrates and protein to avoid being ill because of undernourishment. We have realized that we must learn to take responsibility for our own physical health, so that we get the best possible experience of life. We know that when we are ill or in hospital our experience of life has been reduced and a lot of us are trying our best to stay healthy.
But we not only have a physical organism, we also have a spiritual organism. This spiritual organism is often referred to as our psyche. This organism must also be nourished. While the physical body needs physical food, the spiritual body needs spiritual ´food´. What is spiritual food or nourishment? It is our thoughts. Our thoughts are ´something´ and they are a type of energy. It is extremely important that we feed our psyche the right types of thoughts because, according to Martinus, the Danish visionary and mystic, our thoughts are the most important factor in our health. Our thoughts are more important for our health than the physical food we eat.
Just as we have hunger and satiation for physical food, we also have hunger and satiation for spiritual food. And just as we can harm our physical body with the wrong type of food, we can harm our spiritual body with the wrong type of spiritual nourishment. And when we feed our spiritual body with the wrong type of ´food´, our spiritual experience of life is also reduced. For that reason it is of importance that we reach clarification about what nutrition is the best for the spirit or psyche. But whereas there is lots of information out there about our physical nourishment, it is a different matter when it comes to our spiritual nourishment. There is not a lot of information about this, and a lot of people are feeding their spirit or psyche with nourishment that can only be defined as junk food. A lack of contact with the right spiritual nourishment will result in spiritual undernourishment. When you never give any thought to what kind of spiritual nourishment you consume, you will in the long run undermine your spiritual health. The human beings must learn that its spiritual health is as important as its physical health.
Martinus does, however, have very clear guidelines about what the best spiritual nourishment is, and he points out that many of us have accustomed ourselves to consuming harmful, not to say deadly, spiritual nourishment. There are many types of harmful spiritual nourishment and one of them consists of ideas that have been passed down from past centuries. It could be old habits and beliefs, such as believing that you need to eat the flesh of other living beings because ´we have always done that´, it could be being afraid of what other people might think if you do not follow the unwritten rules, it could be not wanting to go against the opinions of the flock, of being afraid to not drink and eat what the others are drinking or eating; in other words being afraid to be who you have become, because others do something differently. It is very important for our mental health to dare to stand up for who we are, even though all the others around us may look down upon us. In this connection it may be worth remembering that many of the traditions that we still live by today were forged centuries ago, so that today they really belong in a museum. This could for instance be discriminating against others because of race, skin colour, religion, sex, age or sexual orientation. If we don’t respect all people, on the spiritual level it’s akin to driving an old Ford T Model, even though on the materialistic level we might be driving a Mercedes or a Jaguar.
What then, is harmful spiritual nourishment? Quite simply, everything that makes people feel antipathy, anger and hatred towards other living beings. It is harmful to watch films that encourage revenge and hatred, films that encourage crime and unlawfulness and films that are packed with violence, blood and killing. Violence, hatred and murder are not healthy spiritual nourishment. It is worse than junk food.
Also there is a lot of harmful nourishment in magazines, such as gossip and focusing on the private life of well-known film stars, royals or billionaires, to see if they are getting divorced or are having affairs, what clothes they wore to this or that event, if they look fat or slim, if they looked good and had a good or bad hair day etc. These magazines have been produced by people whose interests are focused on the idolatry of ´glamour´ and money, and that is not what human life is about. It is poison for the psyche and only leads to jealousy, envy and a lack of self-worth in the reader.
One should also avoid speaking badly about other persons, speaking behind a person´s back and sowing the negative seeds of rumours and gossip. If one still has these tendencies, then one must realize that s/he has a medieval side to the psyche.
Another type of harmful spiritual nourishment is directed at yourself, by yourself, e.g.: self-criticism, dwelling on past mistakes, reliving painful episodes in the past and recycling emotional pain. Let it go! Learn from your mistakes but don´t dwell on them. Leave them in the past where they belong and move on. If your mind keeps returning to the mistakes of the past, then make a mental catalogue of loving and happy replacement thoughts that you can activate instead.
It is important to realize that we have the ability to focus and this means that we have an enormous choice of thoughts we can think. We have millions and millions of thoughts at our disposal and we are free to choose which thoughts we allow into our thought sphere. Some of the thoughts may have been dressed up in a chocolate coating, so that we think that they are healthy and attractive, but at their core they can be poisonous and harmful. We all have responsibility for our own mental or psychic life. Nobody else has. Not our spouse or mother, not our best friend. Only us!
As it is extremely important for the maintenance of a healthy psyche to learn which substances are the right spiritual nourishment, what then are they, in a nutshell?
It is first and foremost: humane and humanitarian thoughts. We must strive to be understanding, kind, tolerant and loving towards our neighbour and all the time evaluate and ask ourselves: is this act that I am about to do humane? Is it kind, is it loving?
The people you win with your love, will come to you to ask your advice, and the best way to influence others is by your example. The right nourishment is thoughts that make you want to be a blessing and a source of joy for your neighbour and help them when they are in need.
We must understand that nobody can be any different than they are today based on their evolution and the experiences they have gone through, and that every one of us is standing at the peak of his/her evolution. If they were wiser, they would have behaved differently, but they were not, so we should forgive, bless and send them light and love. We all stand at different stages of our development, and blaming a person that s/he is nor very evolved is the same as blaming a thistle because it’s not a rose. We have no right to judge, because we do not know the path other people are on, we do not know their challenges nor their sufferings. We have no right to criticise or throw stones, nor to feel enmity or bitterness towards anybody. When we strive to act in a kind, loving and tolerant way, we have started feeding our psyche the right kind of nourishment that will bring us spiritual health. When we think positive thoughts we magnetize our blood positively and this will bring health to every part of our body.
The spiritual hunger comes as a result of our material satiation. Once we have filled our material needs, we realize that fancy villas, expensive cars, fur coats, jewellery and designer clothes do not feed our soul. What use it is to be a millionaire and be able to buy everything you want, when you cannot make your family life function because of control issues, unkindness and lack of love? What use is it for the millionaire when he gets hit with a serious illness and has nowhere to turn in his hour of need? These states will eventually give rise to a spiritual hunger and to the questions: what is life all about? Why are we here? What is the solution to the mystery of life?
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Some change is welcome – some change is not. Every month or year or two life has a habit of throwing something at us that we can’t expect; it could be a job promotion, acquisition, sale, tournament loss, separation or graduation. Change comes in a number of ways in our life almost constantly, dictating our future step by step of the way.
Change is sometimes uncomfortable whether it be starting a new job or moving to a big new house. There’s always an adjustment period for any new habits; and despite our reluctant fear of change, we spend our whole lives overcoming it and finding new ways to adapt and deal with change.
Here’s a couple things to remind yourself about when you are struggling to get through some changes:
We tend to remember the bad changes more than the good changes and they reflect in our memory for a long time. Whenever a big change occurs we have to remember there is always going to be another time. Life has a tendency to move faster than we expect, and before we know it, new changes are occurring all around us. It only takes a minute for something to change in your life, and suddenly a new life is spiraling into being.
It doesn’t take a lot for us to perceive the immediate future but when something jars us it affects our plans. Perhaps bad timing of work incident upsets your schedule for a while. We should anticipate and be prepared for change whenever it rears itself. We can appreciate the moment we have but know that it may not last forever – whether for better or worse; and we will survive on through.
Remind yourself about all the times you’ve already survived a big change in your life. The last breakup, you made it through. The last time you got fired, here you are, we made it again. That time someone was really upset with you – well here we are. We seem to survive every single time our life changes, and we didn’t even break a sweat.
And every time we go through one of those changes things seem to start looking better. Everything gets really low for a few days, a few weeks, or months; we’re not sure what’s going to happen! We are however, an expert on getting through our changes, however we do it; and every time we come right back up again.
All those times we resurface from change, we continuing living the same life we did, being who we are, but with the memory in our heads; a lesson learnt, a story told or a tragedy survived. We become stronger with the knowledge and more confident the more experiences we have, and with that we become better people. We know what we can get through and we know how to do it.
Change comes in the form of anything from relationship separation and family deaths to job changes, moving houses, accidents or successes. Regardless of what path we follow in life, we are bound to experience change, and our resilience to succeeding obstacles is profound. We learn to adapt to new environments, form new habits, and readdress the way we perceive ourselves. We become stronger versions of ourselves with better defensive mechanisms and a smarter way of conquering our challenges.
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Energy—it’s everywhere. Our bodies are composed of it. Our world is made of it. No doubt, over the past ten years you’ve heard a lot about energy including the power of our thoughts, the law of attraction, manifestation and the like. Energy thrives in alignment. So when you’re having one of those amazing days where everything is going right, chances are, you’re in alignment. When you’re feeling off, stuck, not so peppy, you got it—the exactly opposite is happening. You’ve gone out of energetic alignment.
It’s ok to go out of alignment. We all do. We’re human and each and every day is a gift of exploration, experiences and ways of being. In fact, being out of alignment can be an opportunity. It can show us what or who contributed to us falling out of alignment and help us to evaluate if it was even warranted or if it was worth giving our power away temporarily. Have you ever had one of those days where everything is moving along quite well, but then one thing frustrates you or annoys you and then you find yourself slipping? Suddenly that good mood has drifted away? During that occurrence, you’ve fallen out of energetic alignment.
The natural state of energetic alignment is a feeling good place. It doesn’t necessarily need to be tied to a person, place or thing. In fact, it’s more powerful when this feeling good comes from the inside. It’s always an inside job! When we’re feeling good, that’s the energy we’re transmitting out to the world—just like an antenna broadcasts a certain frequency. This transmission informs the energy in the field surrounding you to bounce back more situations and experiences that mirror the frequency of the energy you’re sending—whether good or bad. It’s the snowball effect. The energy compounds on top of each other. So when you’re feeling good, you end up having one of those days when everything goes right.
But what about those times when you do feel off? How do you get back on track? It’s simpler than you think. I’ve found that using all five of these tips works best, however if you are pressed for time try one or two. The point is to ignite your own minute-by-minute transformation—from feeling off to feeling better. These steps are the most sure fire way to get you back to that good feeling place.
Movement doesn’t have to be a full blown workout! If you’re out there groaning about this one, stay with me. This step can be as simple as taking a walk around the block on your lunch break or taking five to ten minutes to do some yoga sun salutations. Exercise triggers movement not only of your body, but of the energy within, freeing up any stagnant or stuck energy. Also, there are many neurological benefits such as the release of endorphins and serotonin to not only help you feel better, but help you sleep better too!
This is one of the easiest steps of the five. Pay attention to your breath. Most of us participate in shallow breathing during the course of our day. Shallow breathing keeps us in a fear-based response within our body. Taking a moment or two or three to focus on our breath, specifically deep cleansing breaths, releases your body’s pent up tension. Only three deep breaths can begin to shift your mood and your perspective.
As you well know, thoughts can shape your experience. While we have upwards of 40 thoughts per minute, it’s impossible to monitor each and every one. However, there are some that come up regularly that may be negative and may not even be true! We are often our own worst enemy. When one of those thoughts pops up, examine it carefully. Is there any truth to it or is it a worry, someone else’s opinion, or is it something in the past that should be put to bed? For those thoughts such as “I’m not good enough,” turn it around in that moment. Although saying “I am enough,” may not initially move mountains for you, over time switching your negative thought to a positive one will eventually program that thought to the positive end of the energetic spectrum over time.
You may think this one is silly, but it’s true. When we smile, the muscles triggered in our faces release powerful neurotransmitters such as endorphins. Yes, the same neurotransmitters released in exercise! If you’re smiling at someone it makes them feel at ease and in some cases can make their day! Smiling at yourself in the mirror, while seeming corny at first, can actually make you feel better too. So smile big and shine those pearly whites!
We’ve heard the benefits of gratitude time and time again. Why is gratitude so powerful? It boils down to love and appreciation. Whenever we’re appreciating a person, place, thing or experience, our focus goes there and is aligned with the vibration of love—one of the highest energetic vibrations in the Universe. When we feel gratitude, not only does that energy go out and bring back more experiences to be grateful for, it makes us feel better too.
Start practicing these five points daily and especially on days when you start out feeling off or not optimum. You’ll see the process working for you as you move forward. If you’re having a great day and you employ these five steps, your day will transform into something phenomenal! Just know that as you keep working with these tips, your energy is spiraling upward and that increases your ability to feel good and attract in your heart’s desires.
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Timing is everything.
If we do the right things, we get the results, no matter when we do them, right?
Not really…
Doing something is definitely better than doing nothing when it comes to our goals and desires.
BUT.
Doing something at the wrong time is not far from nothing. And definitely VERY far from our best.
We function according to our biological clocks, whether we want it or not, whether we know about it or not.
How well do we function? These days – not so well. We kind of suck at it, doing most of the things against our biological rhythms, that science also refers to as circadian rhythms.
A circadian rhythm is a roughly 24 hour cycle in the physiological processes of living beings.
Circadian rhythms are important in determining the sleeping and feeding patterns of all animals, including human beings.
There are clear patterns of brain wave activity, hormone production, cell regeneration and other biological activities linked to this daily cycle.
~ ScienceDaily.com“Just by making small tweaks to your schedule—such as when to have the first cup of coffee, when to answer emails, when to nap—you’ll nudge the rhythm of your day back in sync with the rhythm of your biology, and then everything will start to feel easier and flow naturally.
What do I mean by the “rhythm of your biology”?
Contrary to what you might have heard, there is a perfect time to do just about anything. Good timing isn’t something you choose, guess, or have to figure out. It’s already happening inside you, in your DNA, from the minute you wake up to the minute you fall asleep, and every minute in between. An inner clock embedded inside your brain has been ticking away, keeping perfect time, since you were three months old. This precisely engineered timekeeper is called your circadian pacemaker, or biological clock.”
~ The Power of When, Michael Breus, PhD
It was so fascinating for me to find out, after taking the quiz defining chronotypes and reading more about it in “The Power of When”, that I’m such a typical LION (Not astrology). Meaning, I love waking up before the Sun just like other typical lions, I’m most productive when the rest of the world is waking up, best time for me to do brainstorming is around 6 am, best time to drink coffee – around 8 am, best time for creative work is afternoon when I’m not that focused on the outcomes and my mind wanders easier, best time to exercise is late afternoon for strength and muscle building, best time to go to bed is definitely before 10 PM – and it goes on and on and on, describing things like when it’s best to eat, to binge, to run for weight loss or to work out for strength and muscle building, best times to have sex, to ask for a raise or to close the sale, to tell a joke, to travel, to binge-watch my favorite TV shows, to write a novel, to play music, to memorize, to present my ideas, to make a decision, to take a pill, to snack, to go on a job interview, to take a shower, to weigh myself, to do yoga or to fall in love – and the amazing part is? How precise it all is! – I figured out a lot of it doing experiments in my life, that are time and energy consuming, but what if it could be done easier? What if somebody could tell me the exact time to do things that would change the whole game – the outcomes and how I feel about them?
What if?
The book, the website with additional resources – they do exactly that!
Take the Quiz.
Get the Book.
Read it.
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Here are three fascinating things for you to try now.
Did you know, that …
“Drinking coffee first thing in the morning does not wake you up, make you alert, or give you an energy boost. All it does, according to science, is raise your tolerance for caffeine so that you need to drink more and more of it to feel any effects at all.
When you are about to wake up, your body releases stimulants to get your juices flowing and your heart pumping: a brew of hormones including insulin, adrenaline, and cortisol. Like most of our organs and glands, the adrenal gland (producer of adrenaline and cortisol) has a biological clock of its own. It carefully maintains the cortisol rhythm, a few cycles of releasing and suppressing the fight-or-flight hormone over the course of the day.
• If you drink coffee when cortisol level is high, the effects are nonexistent. Compared to cortisol, caffeine is weak tea. The only thing coffee does for you within two hours of waking is to increase your tolerance for caffeine.
• If you drink coffee when cortisol level is low, caffeine gently nudges your adrenals to give you a hit of adrenaline, and you will feel more awake and alert.
Scientific research and bio-time have provided a very clear schedule for coffee breaks to coincide with cortisol level dips.”
THE WORST TIME TO HAVE COFFEE
THE BEST TIME TO HAVE COFFEE
The cortisol level dips or optimal coffee break times for each chronotype are:
Fascinating isn’t it?
Drinking coffee at the wrong times might be screwing up your whole life!
Is YOUR coffee on time?
Did you know, that …
“The writing rhythm, or when you should craft emails, depends on whether you’re sending a professional communication or a personal one.
Professional emails should be written at optimal times, when your mental clarity is peaking. When I open a short email, I tend to reply immediately. If I open a long email, I ignore it and hope to deal with it later. At on-peak alertness times, you won’t veer off-topic and will stay focused, concise, and to the point.
Personal emails to friends and family are best written at off-peak alertness times, when you’re more likely to ramble and do a time-consuming photo edit or comment at length on a link.
Your well-crafted emails are more likely to be opened and replied to if you hit send at strategic times. [The sending rhythm]
[Business Emails]
Weekend emails are opened and replied to at a higher percentage than weekday mailings, due to decreased “in-box competition.”
Early mornings and late nights get the highest percentage of reads and replies.
[Personal emails]
If they are going to reply at all, 90 percent of people will do so within one day of receiving an email. Half will reply within one hour. Reply time is faster in the afternoon and evening and slower late at night and early in the morning.
THE WORST TIME TO EMAIL
THE BEST TIME TO EMAIL
The author also mentions procrastination rhythm – how we and people we email are more likely to procrastinate on writing and answering to emails at certain times. – Good to know, since someone receiving your email at the wrong time might be procrastinating on replying to it right at this very moment. Maybe it’s time to choose different timing for your emails to get a better response rate instead of becoming a master of email writing.
Did you know, that …
The Simple Science How on earth did humans adopt the practice of having sex at bedtime, “where” and “when” we’re supposed to be unconscious?
One argument is that sex is a sleep aid. There is not much science to back this up. As an expert in sleep medicine, I can attest to the fact that getting in bed at night and turning off the light does bring sleep. Having fifteen to thirty minutes of sex is beside the point. Melatonin goes up when the lights go off. If you have sex with the lamps blazing, sex can delay the onset of sleep for women. Making love while fighting sleep does not increase intimacy between partners.
Only 28 percent of encounters happened because subjects felt sexual. And why would someone feel sexual between 11:00 p.m. and 1:00 a.m., when the vast majority of subjects had sex? That’s when your heart rate is slow and melatonin is making you sleepy. Your body is not primed for any physical activity at this time, let alone sex. Turning your partner down night after night out of exhaustion or lack of desire can lead to hurt feelings and emotional distance. Going through the motions doesn’t engender a loving feeling, either.
Good sex, when desire is peaking and you’re physically and mentally alert, has enormous health and emotional benefits. A healthy afterglow rhythm increases circulation, oxygenates the entire body, and gives you a sense of well-being. Antibodies released during sex boost the immune system, preventing and curing minor ailments. Orgasm triggers oxytocin, elevating your mood and sense of connection to your partner all day. When oxytocin levels go up, cortisol levels go down. They’re on a seesaw. More sex, less stress—and less of all the health problems associated with stress, such as obesity, heart disease, and mood disorders. The chemical benefit of sex, that loving feeling, is too often squandered if you have sex and then fall asleep.
THE WORST TIME TO HAVE SEX
THE BEST TIME TO HAVE SEX
Aren’t you wondering now that your sexual life is not exactly “working out” for you, because of bad timing?
The post How Your Coffee, Emails And Sex Might Be Failing You appeared first on Change your thoughts.
We are our own toughest critics – it’s true for a reason! Everyone says it, and the more you reflect on it, the more believable it is. Even though sometimes it may be in jest, we are critical of ourselves from the minute we wake up –
“My hair is a mess!”
“I look old today.”
“I wish I could cook better.”
“If I wasn’t so lazy I could…”
These are just a few examples, but we’re usually quite hard on ourselves throughout the day. A lot of the time it takes a special friend to remind us about our best qualities, but it doesn’t have to. We have the ability to make ourselves feel good too! Just focus on your most wonderful qualities (ie. all of them) and drive them through the day.
We all deserve to treat ourselves with more respect. We do not need to belittle or undermine ourselves at any point. We all have such admirable qualities, which somehow makes our individuality our common factor.
You wake up in the morning, your hair is a mess and all you can see are the bags under your eyes. Fast forward an hour or two later – you’ve showered, shaved, put your makeup on – and you look great! Your hair is just the way you want it, and your attitude is ready to match. You feel great, you’re ready for work, the gala, the dinner, whatever you need to get ready for, and you do it with style.
You’re the only person who knows all the kinks in your hair and best side’s of your face for pictures. Only you know the best way to dress yourself, the best way to make yourself feel confident and powerful. Keep up the good work!
Our friends are special people to us – we’ve come into each other’s lives almost by random, and have decided to keep each other around. Your friends value your sense of humour, your attractive qualities, and all the reasons that make you valuable. They talk to you when they have great news or when they have bad news, and vice versa. You’re good at being a good friend, and your friends are living proof.
Everyone has a family, and whether or not we are on the best terms with them is not an equal measure to our unconditional love for them. Our family are people that we have to spend a lot of time with, and there are bound to be arguments; but no one else can provide the love for your family that you do, and to each member of your family – who knows you very personally – you are uniquely you, and irreplaceable.
We use terms like rich and poor too often to describe ourselves and the way we see other people. Whether you think you are rich or poor or not, if you are reading this blog chances are you have a computer, smart phone, internet connection, you can pay for a room to keep all that in, clothes to wear, and a job to pay for it all with. You have a job, that you do well enough to perform and keep, and people there trust you with responsibilities that you have been chosen uniquely to do for the reasons you do it. Be proud of your work.
No matter what your background ethnicity or heritage is, we all have amazing family foods that we eat and carry to next generations – kitchen secrets that only our families know how to make. It can be grandma’s special tomato sauce or dad’s perogies; the reasons we have friends over to enjoy our cooking and cherish a special time together.
We all experience stress and anxiety – internet memes have confirmed this. But you’re the only person who knows how to relax and tune out the best way for you. You can find your calm wherever it is best for you, and you don’t need to follow anyone else’s idea about it. You do what you think is fun, and love it, and other people do what they like to do. Gotta love, the things you love.
As cinema shows us, sometimes we have to make peace, respect and even congratulate or empower our enemies to show respect or make a draw. Well, if enemies can do that, then imagine how much respect your acquaintances, close friends, colleagues, family, online friends, or whomever show you every day in your day to day life. It’s fantastic to think about – our great circle of respect that we all show for each other everyday. And everyday, everyone shows you a unique respect, the only one that can be given to you.
The post 7 Things You Are Good At And You Don’t Even Know appeared first on Change your thoughts.
“Give yourself a break. Stop beating yourself up! Everyone makes mistakes, has setbacks and failures. You don’t come with a book on how to get it right all the time. You will fail sometimes, not because you planned to, but simply because you’re human. Failure is a part of creating a great life.” – Les Brown
Growing up in a traditional Asian household, my dad made it clear that academics were always a top priority and by top I mean the ONLY priority in my life. Straight A’s wasn’t a goal; it was a requirement. Even when I got all A’s and one B, that B stuck out like a sore thumb.
“What’s going on? How come you couldn’t get straight A’s?”
It wasn’t good enough that I got 90%, in his eyes, it had to be 100%. This created a lot of pressure and tension for me when it came to academics. I was already motivated to do well in school, but I hated the pressure of always having to be perfect.
I worked hard in high school and achieved straight A’s every semester until my senior year. That year I would experience a different type of failure for the first time in my life. It was something my dad never prepared me for, and I wished he had. That failure was a broken heart.
The summer before my senior year, my high school sweetheart of two years broke up with me. She said it was because we were both going to be away for college and it didn’t make sense to maintain a long distance relationship. I felt differently otherwise.
My senior year would end up being the year from hell. I became reclusive, left school every day at lunch to avoid being there and got a 3.3 GPA, my worst ever. But the worst decision was when I decided not to apply to my college of choice because I was afraid to go away for college. Instead, I stayed home and went to a local university.
That heartbreak kicked off a series of failures that I almost never recovered from. I spent the next 15 years fighting addiction, depression, rejection, more heartbreaks, and even thoughts of suicide. Those were very tough times, but these days I’m in a much better place after turning my life around in 2012.
I’ve learned quite a bit about failure first hand through that experience and here are the ten things I wish my dad taught me about failure:
Failure is scary because it comes in so many forms, many of which we’re never truly prepared for. While I grew up understanding failure in the context of school, I had to learn the hard way the other variations of failure. Broken heart? Check. Didn’t get that job I wanted? Check again. Falling out with a friend? Yup, that was me.
Rather than associate failure with my grades, I wish my dad had taught me what failure was in general. More specifically I what it feels like and how to deal with it when it happens. This way I would be better prepared to deal with any type of failure opposed to just one.
I felt like my parents were too prescriptive when it came to raising me. “Do that, don’t do this.” While it’s straight to the point, I would’ve learned better had they added some context around why I should or should not do something. Parents should always help their children understand why.
Raise your hand if you’ve experienced at least one of the following:
In about 30 seconds, I listed every type of failure I could think of that I’ve experienced in my life. And I’m sure there’s more that you can add to this list. We don’t always classify these experiences as failures, but it definitely feels like it when it happens. The point I want to make is that failure is a normal part of life. We shouldn’t look at failure as something to avoid but rather an experience that we can learn and grow from.
When my high school sweetheart broke up with me, she reasoned that we would be going off to different colleges and it didn’t make sense to stay together. The following week, I saw her going to the Homecoming dancing holding hands with another guy. I was furious. Why did she lie to me? How could she tell me one thing but do another?
One of my best traits as a child growing up was my ability to self-reflect. Rather than point the finger at her, I looked at what I might’ve doneto contribute to the breakup. She was into athletics and played three sports year round. I, on the other hand, was into academics. After school when she would have her games, I would spend my time studying instead. Looking back that might’ve been a factor since I wasn’t there to watch and support her.
Even though I was hurt and felt like she cheated on me, I knew it wasn’t 100% her fault. I shouldered some of the blame myself. Having this insight and self-reflection allowed me to work on myself and ensure that I don’t make the same mistakes again.
In 1987, I was seven years old and living in Los Angeles. I remember one morning while playing in the playground at school during recess; the ground shook violently. I saw kids running and hiding under benches, and at one point I saw the ground move like a wave in the ocean. My friends and I didn’t know what to do so we stood in fear and held each other.
That was the first time I ever experienced an earthquake. The next few weeks, the school educated us on earthquake safety and preparedness. We learned what to do in the case of an earthquake, where to stand/hide under, and created emergency earthquake kits to take home. It was this moment that taught me to always prepare for the worst.
Now that I’m older I use this same mentality when it comes to failure. I don’t expect to get fired, have a divorce, or be homeless, but at the same time, I also understand I’m not immune. Knowing these are all real possibilities, it forces me to be more mindful and present when it comes to my marriage and career. I learn to not things for granted.
Sometimes I feel like the notion of success and failure gets misconstrued by how the media portrays it. For example, when you watch the sporting events like the Superbowl there is a victor, a loser, and nothing in between. People say there is no moral victory in losing, but I highly disagree. Failure can teach us a great deal of what we need to improve in order to be successful.
Take a look at some of the most successful people in recent history and see how their failures propelled them to further success. Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team. Oprah Winfrey was fired from her job as a news anchor. Steve Jobs was fired from Apple, his own company that he started. Needless to say, all three of these people did pretty well for themselves despite their failures.
I know I used three well-known celebrities in my example, but I encourage you to talk to people you consider successful in your circle. I’m sure they will all have some story about the struggles they had to overcome to get to where they are today. While the media embellishes overnight success stories, what they don’t tell you are the 10+ years of sleepless nights it took to get there.
In high school, my parents gave me the assignment of cleaning out the garage on a Saturday morning. Rather than complain about the chore, I decided to have a little fun with it. In our garage, we stored everything you could think of like old computers, toys, and clothes nobody wore anymore.
Instead of throwing them way, I decided I was going to host a garage sale. I laid everything out on the lawn, posted flyers on the lamp posts in my neighborhood, and waited for customers to trickle in. I made about $100 that day which wasn’t bad considering I was going to throw most of the stuff away anyway. Being an entrepreneur was something I knew I was destined for.
However, I lost my way in my 20’s because of my struggles with addiction and depression. The fear of failing prevented me taking risks in my career to do meaningful work. I kept telling myself I wasn’t good enough even though I knew it wasn’t true. It wasn’t until I turned my life around and got over my fear of failing was I able to finally become my own boss.
I went to a leadership retreat a few weeks ago. There were about 80 people total, and we were all split into smaller groups of six each with its own group leader. On the first night during dinner, we each had to share a crucible moment in our lives. If you’re not familiar with what a crucible moment is, it’s an example of a time where you faced extreme hardship or adversity only to come out of it a better person.
When it came time for me to share, I talked about my break up after college and how that led me down the path of destruction. As I shared my story and got to the part about how I used to think about suicide, I started to cry. I cried because I felt sorry for myself. I cried because I could remember how much pain I felt back then. But as I continued, I shared how resilient I had become and was able to rebuild my life.
One of my teammates looked at me and said, “If there’s anything I could take away from your story, it’s the fact that no matter how tough things look you can always start over.” She was absolutely right because no matter how many times I failed, I never gave up. My persistent to fight was what led me to evolve into the person I am today.
In 2013, I was determined to figure out how to make a dollar selling something digital on the Internet. Not $100, $10, or $5; I was simply focused on making a single dollar. After doing some keyword research, I settled on creating an eBook on how to crate train puppies. There was decent search volume each month with very little competition for products.
I spent about two weeks researching and writing the eBook. I then created a sales page, uploaded my eBook on the web, and connected it to a payment processing system. I had a $100 coupon for Google Adwords and decided to use Adwords to drive traffic over. I set up my Adwords campaigns on a Saturday night and went to bed.
The next morning I woke up early and found I had made two sales for a total of $30. I couldn’t believe my eyes; I actually did it. I decided to continue running ads for two more weeks. In the end, I spent $250 in ads only to make two more sales for a final total of $60. It didn’t matter that I didn’t turn a profit because the reward was in the learning.
When I graduated college in 2004, I went to work at Sun Microsystems, one of the largest renowned tech companies in the world at the time. Sun Microsystems or Sun as I like to call it, was such a well-respected company. Working there back then is the equivalent of working at Apple, Facebook, or Google today. When I was hired on, I thought my career was set.
Unfortunately when I came on board, Sun was going through a rough time. The company had some key poor decisions that caused them to severely lose ground in the market. Then in 2009, Sun was acquired by Oracle, and a majority of the workforce was laid off including me. Just imagine if Facebook as a company no longer existed; that’s what it felt like.
I loved working at Sun, and even though it wasn’t my fault that I no longer had a job, I felt extremely dejected. I was embarrassed to apply at other companies because I felt like a failure. It was the first time I’ve ever been laid off from a job, and it wouldn’t be the last. But even through all that I still ended up in a meaningful career doing what I love. Not too shabby I would say.
My parents immigrated from Vietnam in 1980 to escape the communists. They had absolutely nothing when they came to the US outside of a few suitcases. They collected cans, picked strawberries in the fields, and did whatever odd jobs they could find to provide for my siblings and me. With a little luck, my dad found steady work as a furniture delivery man.
My dad worked long hours and worked his way up to be a salesman where he learned the ins and outs of owning a furniture store. Eventually, he would save up enough money to open up his own furniture store; it was a very proud moment for him. My dad soon found out that running a business is much tougher than working in a business. The furniture store struggled, and after a few years, it went out of business. It was very tough on my dad.
I can understand why my dad pushed me so hard in school. He didn’t want me to experience failure like how he had experienced failure, but I would’ve experienced failure one way or another. There was nothing he could’ve done to shield me from it. The best thing he could’ve done which to use his experience and teach me how to embrace failure instead of fear it.
The post 10 Things I Wish My Dad Taught Me About Failure appeared first on Change your thoughts.
Sig Nordal 