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Over the last 9 years of working online, and offline,helping thousands of people around the world with my Guided Meditations, Positive Affirmations, coaching and various other products, there is one technique I have developed to heal, strengthen and attract relationships in your life, that has had amazing results for everyone who has used it.
Before I go on and tell you what this technique is I would like to share with you how it started.
About 16 years ago I was working with a company called British Telecommunications in the UK and was a customer service advisor on the phone so when a customer had a problem or wanted to buy a new service they would initially get through to someone like me. While I was working there the management changed quite frequently, this is not uncommon in this type of environment.
I had one particular boss, who happened to be female, who didn’t take to me at all. I thought that she was OK, although she was very aggressive. She lacked assertiveness but she was aggressive in the way she spoke and treated people, both staff and customers. Not nice at all but underneath it all she was actually an ok person but she came across as extremely aggressive and it came across that she didn’t like me at all, to the extent that my colleagues started commenting on it.
I was part of a sales team who were the top sellers in the company, in Glasgow. She headed up the new team and was a bit of a tyrant and set high targets for ourselves and herself.
When I was selling to people on the phone I used to do it in a different way from the others. However, I was still getting the great results and a lot of the sales and hitting my high targets but what I was doing was selling in an authentic way. I wouldn’t just sell somebody something for the sake of it, I would tell the truth about the product i.e. I would tell the truth about the sale; ‘I don’t’ think that’s good for you, you should maybe take that off your service, you’re paying for something you don’t really need’. Now that customer would go off and think oh my god that’s someone being really honest that’s refreshing to hear and people would frequently comment on that, and often buy more products from me.
Anyway this manager didn’t like this and didn’t like the way I operated and she just generally didn’t like me. There was contempt there for me, so I was trying to think of way to strength our relationship because I was going to have to work with her every single day and have contact with her at morning meetings etc.
So I decided to try a technique I had heard about at a seminar, which I modified.
Now, I tried this technique with this woman at work, this boss I had and it took about two weeks of genuinely trying, in total about 5 attempts, and our relationship began to change. She started to engage with me, to laugh with me, not at me. The relationship was getting much better; I kept on trying the technique, mostly in the morning.
After about 4 weeks, our relationship had completely changed and we became a force within BT. She seemed to mellow out a little, so much so that the team started to relax and even enjoy drinks with her on nights out, which is something she previously did not do. On one such night out, we had a chance to have a talk whilst being slightly merry from the drink. I asked her what had changed over the last few weeks as she had seemed to mellow out a little. She looked at me and said she honestly didn’t know, but she felt there had been some kind of change in her, but couldn’t explain it. Needless to say I didn’t tell her about the relationship bubble.
Basically what we do here is we spend 5 – 10 mins just before we’re drifting off to sleep and 5 – 10 minutes as we are waking up in the morning, depending how often you want to spend on it, and we do a visualization.
When you get to the stage of drifting off to sleep imagine a huge, clear bubble, big enough to fit about 10 people in. Imagine this bubble floating up into the night sky and watch it as it slowly gets higher and higher. You then imagine yourself floating up to the bubble, you are weightless and the feeling you get is amazing, floating and drifting in space, you are connected to the world. As you float towards the bubble, a door opens and you step inside the bubble, which has a clear floor with two chairs angled towards each other. Take a seat in one of the chairs and just watch the world below you through the clear, glass like bubble.
Now it’s time to ask the person you’d like to join you. This could be someone you’re having difficulty with, or someone you’d like to have a better relationship with. from the bubble you see the person floating up through the sky towards the door of the bubble. You open the door and invite them in. They might look a little bewildered, as you offer them the chair to sit down on.
After a few seconds you start to talk to them telling them how you feel, and why you have asked them here. get everything off your chest, and speak the truth. After you have finsihed talking, stay silent and wait for them to speak, and as they speak listen to them, really listen. And then, let the conversation flow, staying calm and relaxed, safe in the knowledge that nothing can harm you here.
After you have finished your conversation, thank the person for coming and then gently let the bubble float back down to earth and drift off into a deep sleep.
Believe me it might sound extremely simple but it really is going to work when you try this technique.
I was going to explain my theories on why it works so well, but I don’t want to taint your thinking about this, so I’ll leave that part for another time, or maybe add it in this article later on.
To resolve a difficult relationship
If you’re having difficulty with someone at work, in your family, or in your social circle the relationship bubble can be an amazing way to gain insights into why the relationship is rocky and work on resolving the issues.
To strengthen a relationship
The relationship Bubble is an amazing way to strengthen an already good relationship with someone, to become more loving, to become more caring, or to speak about the little things that may be bothering you.
Resolve family issues
I’ve used this lots of times when I have been worried about family members, and they are not particularly open to talking. The relationship Bubble offers a secure way to speak to someone, and to help you decrease your anxiety or worry about a family member. There’s been more than a few occasions that family members, who previously would not speak about their problems, have opened up a day or two after I used the bubble.
Attracting a relationship
If you would like to attract a relationship in your life, whether it be personal, business or just for social reasons, then the relationship bubble is great for this. Instead of summoning someone who you know, you just summon someone, knowing that the right person will join you in the bubble.
This is also a great way to attract more customers, for example if you’re a sales person, you can attract customers using this technique as well.
I know that a lot of readers will be thinking, ‘how can this work, all I am doing is talking and listening to myself’. Well, all I can really say is try it and see the difference it makes in your life and with your relationships with other people. As I said I don’t want to give my theory as to why it works, but just know that it works.
I would love to hear your stories about how you have used this technique and how successful it was for you. So if you decide to be open minded and really use it, let me know how you get on.
The post ONE Mind-Blowing Technique to Heal, Strengthen, and Attract Relationships appeared first on Change your thoughts.
The following post was written as a companion post for the Kindle book – The New Meaning of Rich: Four Principles of Wealth That Will Change Your Life. Follow the link for your free copy, from May 19th to May 22nd!
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“Our souls are not hungry for fame, comfort, wealth, or power. Our souls are hungry for meaning, for the sense that we have figured out how to live, so that our lives matter so the world will at least be a little bit different for our having passed through it.” – Rabbi Harold Kushner
We live in a world where the true meaning of wealth has been lost.
In years past, a dream of riches was synonymous to Charlie Sheen’s character in Wall Street. Today’s world is one that no longer fits that dream. Greasy-haired stock brokers who grind their way to the top is not the idea of rich anyone believes in anymore. There is a problem, however, in that we lack any other definition of wealth.
We need to change how we think about wealth. We need to redefine what it means to be “rich.” Wealth, defined in this modern age, is a true ownership of your emotions, time, location, and ability to give back. When you follow this definition of wealth, and focus on maximizing each area, the monetary riches follow, 100% of the time, every time.
Before we go on, it’s important to define what wealth means in the traditional sense, too. Traditional wealth places high value on monetary possessions, or “shiny objects.” The faster your car, the bigger your house, and the more lavish your vacations, directly reflects how rich you are, and therefore how much wealth you have.
Using this traditional definition, the more cars you have, the happier you are. But this can’t be so, on both an emotional or logical level.
Think about owning cars, which traditionally depicts the idea that money buys happiness. You’ll see that there’s a law of diminishing returns to the amount of happiness you receive from an increasing number of material possessions. How much satisfaction, for example, will you receive from owning three cars vs. two cars?
The first car you own has massive impact: the new mobility is literally life changing. You can commute to your job, you can meet your friends for fun evenings, and you can go on long drives when you need to clear your mind.
As you add cars to your life, its marginal impact on your life decreases. Therefore, you can see how you receive increasingly less happiness with increasingly more shiny objects:
By car number four, it has such a minimal impact on your life that you barely even feel the effects. By car number 5, you’ve had to focus so much time and energy on building enough wealth to afford it, that it actually decreases your happiness.
And this doesn’t even take into account the hollowness you feel from the emotional fact that you thought all along that car number 5 would be the differentiating factor in your life.
Therefore, our definition of wealth needs to change. Our idea of rich has to be updated in this new age.
Look, I hate to be morbid, but we’re all going to die. No one makes it out of this alive. The quicker you understand your own mortality the quicker you’ll understand the following question: If the ultimate goal of life is happiness, then how should wealth be defined?
True Wealth should be the true ownership of the following four categories of your life: Emotions, Time, Location, and Reciprocation. True riches should be the maximization and fulfillment of each one of these Principles, in the way you see most fit:
1. Emotional Wealth – The accumulation of positive emotions and experiences. Full ownership of your emotional stability means that you are in consistent control of yourself and aren’t affected by outside factors.
2. Time Wealth – The ability to spend your time in the way that provides you with the most personal value. Full ownership of your time means that you decide how to allocate your time in ways that move your life in the direction you want.
3. Location Wealth – The ability to travel – or live – wherever you want, whenever you want. This doesn’t necessarily mean the monetary resources to do this, but rather the time, energy, and career that’ll allow you to do so. Full ownership of your location means you can work, live, and vacation, wherever and whenever you want.
4. Wealth of Reciprocation – The capstone Principle of Wealth. Taking each of the three previous Principles of Wealth, it’s the ability – and desire – to spread the happiness you’ve gained. Full ownership of reciprocation means the unbridled spreading of positive emotions, lifestyle, and happiness.
When you think about wealth as these four Principles, it’s much easier to see how becoming rich actually increases your happiness.
And although each Principle of Wealth should be improved upon in order, they are all connected, and they are all perpetual:
Your Emotional Wealth will allow you to see with clarity, which will give you insight on how to build a life that gives you freedom of time, which will allow you to live and travel wherever you want, which will expand your circle of influence and ability to give back, which will further increase your Emotional Wealth.
When we are able to define and then increase our happiness through this new meaning of Wealth, it will actually allow us to produce money and things, or more importantly, the right amount of the two that’ll make you feel alive and satisfied.
Pursue your passion and happiness and the money will follow. Trust me.
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Evan Tarver is a business development specialist with dynamic experience in the technology industry, and is a self-proclaimed “business nerd.” He believes that entrepreneurship is the key to massive self-improvement, incredible self-growth, and lasting change.
By drawing on his own triumphs and failures, Evan helps people live meaningful lives through experiences that matter. Connect with him today and receive your free copy – The New Meaning of Rich: Four Principles of Wealth That Will Change Your Life.
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