You’re reading If You’re Saying Yes To THIS, What Are You Saying No To?, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.
Many hardworking people, especially (but certainly not limited to) those in the early stages of their careers, have a hard time saying no when asked to take on new tasks in the workplace. Early on in adult life, we’re conditioned to take on new responsibilities and accept the challenges handed to us at work.
Say yes now, figure it out later.
Although sometimes that works out well (“Do you know how to resize photos in Photoshop?” “Of course!” — it’s easy enough to Google), oftentimes the effect is opposite to what we’re hoping for. Instead of looking like can-do, efficient workers, we end up behind on other commitments and burnt out trying to accomplish everything we set out to do.
Some of us have had jobs with crazy, almost impossible deadlines. We’d receive emails at 3:30 a.m. and wonder if our project manager had gone to bed yet or if she was already awake, starting her day. Being busy doesn’t always translate to being productive. Nor healthy. Someone told me recently that their friend missed her grandfather’s funeral because she couldn’t get out of work. Surely this can’t be the way to get ahead in our careers.
But, of course, we all want to show initiative and develop new skills at work.
So, what to do? How can we take on more if we’ve already taken on enough?
The Coaching Habit outlines seven great questions that every manager ought to ask in order to effectively lead their employees to success. When it comes to an overwhelmed and overworked employee who is saying yes to yet another thing that’s being thrown at them, why not ask, “If you’re saying yes to this, what are you saying no to?”
This question is a strategic one, and one that can help both manager and employee prioritize and evaluate.
As a manager, asking this question of your employee helps you define what exactly the employee needs to focus on and how exactly you can help them get there. As an employee, answering this question forces you to explain exactly what you need from your manager in order to complete the task.
This question may lead to many more questions, but that’s why it’s so strategic.
A yes is nothing without the no that gives it boundaries and form. Learn to say yes a little more slowly — ask more questions before committing, no matter what side of the question you’re on.
It’s tough to say no to coworkers, and even tougher to say no to bosses. Managers, too, want to say yes to helping their employees. Unfortunately, sometimes we really do need to say no, or at least figure out a way to say no to one thing in order to say yes to something else.
Here are few questions you can ask that will help you say yes a little more slowly:
These questions will show your interest in the task at hand, help determine what both parties can do to help and have the end result of creating a strategic and feasible plan. Sometimes you might have to say no to part of the request, or even to all of it, but other times you’ll discover there are ways to alleviate stress and complete everything that needs to be done.
And you never know — the person looking for an immediate yes may just head off to find someone else willing to say yes quicker than you were!
For useful tips and tools that will help you improve the way you lead, check out the Box of Crayons blog. We often share blogs like these:
The Hardest Question to Ask
5 Tactics for Managing the Overwhelm
What to Do When Your Boss Is Crazy
Michael Bungay Stanier is the Senior Partner of Box of Crayons, a company that helps organizations do less Good Work and more Great Work. Box of Crayons is best known for its coaching programs, which give busy managers practical tools to coach in 10 minutes or less.
Download free chapters of Michael’s latest book The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever here.
You’ve read If You’re Saying Yes To THIS, What Are You Saying No To?, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.
Dynamism through balconies
Place of intellectuals and bohemians, Botafogo neighborhood has been going through a process of increasing value and vertical growth for the past few years, mixing new residential condos with historical buildings and modest residences from the beginning of the 20th century. This diversity makes the region perfect scenery to welcome unique architecture, beyond conventional real estate market standards, such as the case of ´Sorocaba 112´.
The conceptual approach of the building’s façades and interiors is developed through investigative architectural and construction models, based on the adjacent buildings and the neighborhood. By doing so, the final design aims to become a dialogue with the cultural richness and history of its surroundings.
The foundation is made of cast walls, glass and horizontal corten steel profiles, creating a transition from the street, through a visual continuum between the entry hall space and the public sidewalk. The material´s strong tone, chosen for the foundation, highlights the lightness of the building´s white body.
The building consists of 12 apartments, three units per floor; all of them are composed by three bedrooms and different plan layouts. The areas vary from 95m2 to 120m2, and each apartment features a 15m2 frontal balcony.
Encouraging the use of bicycles for riding in the neighborhood and in the city was also an important aspect of the project. Besides providing a customized bicycle for each apartment, a map with indications of local bike routes and cultural attractions was included in the bicycle storage place.
“Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is the perspective, not the truth.” Marcus Aurelius
I found it difficult to get out of bed in the morning.
I wanted to climb into a deep hole in the earth and never come out again.
I saw only the most dire future for myself after this divorce was completed. It didn’t seem like life was worth living anymore.
If you’re facing a lot of challenges and difficulties right now, it’s easy to want to give up and throw in the towel. If you’re going through a divorce, a breakup or a loss of some other kind, it’s hard to stay afloat in the stormy waters of life.
Life’s traumatic changes often are often accompanied with grief and it’s difficult to keep our perspective. It’s difficult to get out of bed in the morning and difficult to show up in the world. Our thoughts overpower us and make us feel like we are specks of dust in an unkind world. It appears as though everything is out of our control when we are confronting challenging circumstances in our lives.
The good news is that you can shift your perspective. You can shift the way you view the events that are unfolding in your life no matter how daunting or negative.
Here are 9 ways to stay optimistic during your most difficult hour:
When things go wrong, our minds love to jump to conclusions and think of worst-case scenarios. We want to play out the worst possible outcome. We love to think that we are going to be homeless, alone and playing for loose change in the subway. This kind of catastrophic thinking isn’t useful. See what can go right for a change. Focus on what the best-case scenario can be.
How can circumstances break in your favor?
No matter how bad things are, they will pass. Has there ever been a life event or situation you’ve been in that hasn’t gone away? Either the situation will change, your perspective will change or your life will change. What the Buddhists say is true about everything being temporary and passing. You’re not going to suffer forever. You will see happiness again. You will jump out of bed again in the morning. Walking the path of the grieving process is necessary to letting go and moving on when facing loss.
One way to keep your head and spirits up is to imagine what’s possible. Instead of focusing on things you can’t do anything about (the past), why not envision the life that’s possible? Why not go about setting intentions and desires for the changes you want to see? Don’t let current circumstances dictate the future. No matter how bad it is, it can get better. There is power in setting intentions and seeing a new picture in your mind’s eye. If visualization works for world-champion Olympians, it can work for you.
While it’s best to release the past and envision the future, the ultimate place of being is the present. See, in this moment right now, as you’re reading this, that everything is ok. You’re fine right now. You’re fine in each instant you pay attention to. This is what’s called mindfulness. If you can be completely in the moment at hand, you won’t suffer the pain of the past or get anxious about the unknowns of tomorrow. Strive through meditation, silence and awareness to bring yourself to the moment in front of you. It’s all you really have.
You can’t find peace when the situation changes. You can’t find peace when a few years have passed. You must cultivate peace. It comes from within you. Peace resides within you at all times, but it’s how to access it that’s the question. We let our minds have a battle royale and entertain us with their wacky scenarios. We have to be the ringleaders who tame the mind and calm it down. Still your thoughts, become aware of your feelings and seek refuge in your calmness. When you tap into your peace within, the circumstances around you begin to shift. If there’s a peaceful river flowing inside you, the world will be more calm around you.
There may be things you can’t do anything about, but what is helping you? Who is part of your support system? How can something develop more positively? What are the lucky breaks that may resolve the situation? Having a positive and high-frequency attitude towards the way things are going to play out will help move circumstances in a positive direction. Believe that the world is going to conspire to help you and support you. You’re going to come through and come out better off than when you went in.
One way to break out of the fear and frustration is to view change as a game or adventure. This may be hard to do, but if you can think of yourself as the protagonist of the game, you’re in charge. You’re in control and the joystick is in your hand. You may die or lose a life metaphorically, but in this video game it’s never “game over.” You have another chance. You have unlimited “lives” to keep getting it right. Go forth with adventure and optimism. Do not believe the game’s over. You are the hero! Look at how you can make change, shift the situation and win the day.
When you get caught up in your problems, you tend to focus on yourself and become preoccupied with what’s happening to you. A simple way to break this pattern of self-sabotage and ruminating on your problems is to do things for others. Help someone. Be there for someone who is suffering a problem in their life. Do volunteer work. Take a friend out for lunch. Call a family member who might need to hear from you. Buy someone a coffee. Do something nice for someone. Be an agent of generosity and kindness.
The words we use reflect our thinking and our beliefs. The way you talk about a situation can impact how you see and feel about it. Talking too much about a negative life event or circumstance doesn’t help, either. Don’t spend hours sharing your negativity with everyone you know. Be mindful of your language and the words you use to describe the problems you’re facing. The more gentle you can be with your words, the better you will feel about the situation.
The post How To Stay Optimistic Even When Your Life Isn’t appeared first on Change your thoughts.
LAVA (Laboratory for Visionary Architecture) has won the competition to redesign an energy park and energy storage building in Heidelberg, Germany, for the Stadtwerke Heidelberg. Currently a cylindrically shaped storage center, the space will be transformed into a dynamic sculpture, city icon, and knowledge hub for sustainable energy, fully accessible to the public with city views.
In order to display the concepts of energy transition, decentralization, networking, flexibility and adaptability, the project will feature a multi-layered façade structure inspired by geometries in nature like leaves, spider webs, and reptile skins. “The result is a dynamic, ever-changing surface of light and shadow, animated by wind, turning the building into a beacon of a dynamic new energy regime.”
Around 20,000 diamond-shaped plates made of thin stainless steel will be hooked to an elastic connection in the meshes of a steel outer network, allowing them to twist up to 90 degrees in the wind.
This number of plates matches the number of households supplied with energy by the network, explained Tobias Wallisser, LAVA director. [This is] a visual signifier of the impact new technology can make.
At night, the static inner shell will be illuminated with blue, green, and white LED lighting mounted below the stairs.
Visitors will experience this exciting place as a three-dimensional structure. Across a bridge, they will reach an elliptical entrance level. Two elevators take them on a journey, giving panoramic views as they are transported to a roof terrace with large staggered terraces and event spaces and a bistro. The emergency stairs are two vertical promenades of knowledge.
In the Energy Park, visitors can learn about the challenges of energy transition in the city of Heidelberg, technical details of the utility company, Stadtwerke, renewable sources of energy on site, and more.
At 56 meters high, the thermal storage complex—which will serve as a key component to the application of renewable energy as it compensates for the gap between heat production and consumption in the city—will become one of the tallest buildings in Heidelberg.
The project will be an example of LAVA’s “re-skinning” research, showcasing its philosophy of “more with less.”
Furthermore, LAVA has recently been named as the 2016 Laureate of the European Prize for Architecture, which honors architects that have “committed to forward the principles of European humanism.”
The project is set to begin construction in 2017, and will be on display—along with 13 other shortlisted entries from the competition—in the IBA (International Building Exhibition) in Hedelberg from October 20 to 22.
Learn more about the project here.
News via: LAVA.
Oslo design studio StokkeAustad has created a modular furniture system for Norwegian brand Elementa that can be easily expanded for changing workspaces. Read more
Sig Nordal 