Sometimes, in the world of architecture and home decor, it’s nice to keep things minimal and simple. Even if that’s your primary concept for a home, however, you can still make sure every room has at least one piece that pops in order to give your space some personality. One of the best examples of this we’ve seen so far is the succinctly named Apartment. Apartment, located in Madrid, Spain, is..
The post Simona Garufi Remodels an Apartment in the Salamanca District of Madrid, Spain appeared first on HomeDSGN.
West Palm Beach – Florida – USA (by Robin Mehdee)
West Palm Beach – Florida – USA (by Robin Mehdee)
💙 Sylvia Falls on 500px by Peter Hill, Sydney,…
💙 Sylvia Falls on 500px by Peter Hill, Sydney, Australia☀ Canon… http://ift.tt/2d2ULQ4
Get off the Roller Coaster: 3 Steps to a Lasting Relationship
The day of love is upon us, Valentines Day! Some look forward to this day as they await patiently for their flower or candy delivery from their loved one. For others, it’s a good day to call in sick, watch slasher films, and avoid the commercialized symbolism of love. I’m often asked about love and relationships. Many find it easy to get into a relationship but not too long afterward they feel dissatisfied.
There is a reason you stay on the relationship rollercoaster. It’s damn exciting…until you’re completely nauseated. You jump off and compose yourself but then jump right back on only remembering the thrill. It’s ok to do this for a while. What else is youth for? But if you’re caught in this cycle, it can be self-destructive.
If you’re ready for lasting love instead of swiping tinder on your lunch break or hitting the hottest happy hours in hopes of getting swept off your barstool, try these three steps.
DECIDE what you really want in a mate
Many can jabber on about physical features or the size of a desired bank account. But let’s get real folks; that’s not all there is to it. What you really want from a life partner is similar to what you want for yourself in the future. Opposites may attract but they usually don’t last.
What are your hobbies, desires, ideology that you would like to have in common with a mate? What do you need from a partner emotionally?
Make a list of what is truly important to you. Also, make a list of things you do NOT want. Does sarcasm rub you the wrong way? If you’re a thrill seeker, don’t entertain dating a homebody. Get specific with earnest attributes that are good for YOU. If you don’t have a clear picture of what you want, it will be hard for the Universe to accommodate you.
COMMIT to yourself
What does that mean? Commit to the list! You’ve taken the time to decide what kind of partner is right for you, so stick to it. Stop wasting time on everyone else. If you go out one night and meet Mr. GQ or Mr. Moneybags but he’s the opposite of what you truly desire, run the other way. Don’t get caught up in surface level characteristics; otherwise, you’ll be complaining how you’ve wasted six months (or longer) dating Mr. Wrong.
A friend once set me up on a dutch dinner date with someone who was supposedly a ‘real catch’ and outwardly he was. It was going great so afterward, we went to my place to watch a movie. Without asking me, he started eating my leftover takeout until it was gone. It was a red flag for me and I never took another call nor saw him again. When my friend ask why I didn’t return his call, I simply said, “Because he ate my cheeseburger”.
Okay, it’s wasn’t ALL about the burger. But I didn’t want to waste time when I was completely turned off on the first date. Some media outlets want you to think that there is only a small pool of single men or women so you better hook one quickly. That’s simply not true. When you commit to what’s right for you and show the Universe that you will not settle for less, it will provide.
See Also: How to Handle a New Relationship
ENGAGE on a personal level with the potential partner before engaging in any sexual activity
I’m not trying to suppress your sexual expression or feminism or whatever reason it is that you hop in the sack on the second date. It’s about your commitment you’ve made to yourself. Does he have the attributes on the list? And no you cannot rattle off questions the first night checking each item like you would go about your grocery list. It takes time.
Have those three hour long conversations on the phone. Take long walks together or Sunday drives. It’s easier to open up when you don’t have to make constant eye contact. Get to know each other on a genuine level. Sex is subjective so don’t muddy the water by jumping into the sack too quickly.
See Also: Tips for a Healthy Relationship
When you make definitive decisions about what’s right for you and stick to, it the Universe will make a path for that person. It’s really that simple.
Love and Light
Michele~
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💙 Igneous Giants on 500px by Gorka Lopez, Barcelona,……
How To Finally Find Fulfillment In An Overly Complex World
You’re reading How To Finally Find Fulfillment In An Overly Complex World, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.
Are you looking for fulfillment? Do you know what that even looks like?
Fulfillment is what you get when you reach a level of contentment and gain a sense of accomplishment, giving you great emotional happiness and satisfaction.
What makes you happy though is not the same thing that makes someone else happy. So don’t think having or doing what others are doing will reap the same feelings and benefits for you.
It’s usually the simple things in life that bring us the most fulfillment, such as being around family and friends.
Each one of us strives for something in life, whether it be material or emotional. What is that for you, and have you ever even asked yourself what that is?
Imagine for a moment right now you were 80 years old. If you were able to look back at your life, what would be your biggest regrets?
What are the things that are really strong in your mind that you feel, and you’d say to yourself, “I should have done that when I had the chance.”
Don’t focus on so-called “mistakes.” That is not the point here, there are no such things as mistakes in life, but there are missed opportunities due to failure to take action.
Today I am going to show you how to find out what makes you happy and get you motivated towards reaching that level of happiness.
First, though, let’s take a look at why living life without fulfillment is like a plane without wings – you aren’t really going to get too far.
Why You Are Missing Out On Some Of Life’s Beauty
Early on in my career, I had been teaching and training people of all ages how to use computers, training them in software on both PCs and Macs.
I had always enjoyed this, and I realized I love teaching others, and I wanted to do more of it.
I knew what I wanted to do but didn’t really know how I would get there.
And then it hit me, the creation of my own website and blog. My own stage where I could teach people what I had learned in my life, the experiences that I have gone through, and how they could also attain a fulfilled and super happy life for themselves by doing what they love.
In one of my favorite movies, Groundhog Day starring Bill Murray, he is stuck in a time loop living the same repetitive day over and over again.
Where he wakes up, and the same song is playing on the radio, to walking down the street and meeting the same people and doing the exact same things. And no matter what he does he cant get out of it.
It’s not until he finds his true identity, and becomes the person he never was, is when he escapes from the repetitive days, and a new more fulfilled and content life begins for him.
We are always striving to be the best and have the best, but the “best” for one person is not always the best for someone else. The picture is different for everyone.
You need to let go of things that you just have no control of in life, and focus your efforts on things that you can change, can affect, and can have a life-changing influence on.
What Your Fulfillment Looks Like
To start living a more fulfilled, content, and meaningful life, you can start to use the following strategies to carve out the most joy for yourself.
– What Do You Want Out Of Life?
You go to a job because you want the money and need to work. You go to a restaurant because you are hungry and want to eat.
See what actions are you doing every day, and where they are taking you.
Ask yourself where do you want to go, what do you want to accomplish, who do you want to be with, what do you want to own, where do you want to travel.
Start to find out what your purpose in life really is. We are only in this world for a very short time, let’s not waste any time on things that just don’t matter.
Write down what you want to get, and what type of relationships you want to have with the people you care about around you.
Find your fulfillment today so that you can be truly happy for the rest of your life.
– Find What You Love And Do It More Often
What do you love doing? For me, I really enjoy rollerblading; it gives me an incredible sense of freedom and happiness that I just can’t describe.
Yet a lot of the time, we are doing things that we just don’t enjoy or get any reward out of.
We all know what makes us happy, so why are we not doing more of it?
If you are working at a job that just doesn’t do anything for you, then you need to start asking yourself what steps do you need to take to start doing work that gives you fulfillment.
If sitting on your favorite couch, wearing your most comfortable slippers, reading a book with a nice cup of warm tea makes you feel at peace, then you need to be doing more of it.
Doing the things you love to do more often gives you a sense of peace over yourself.
– Set Realistic Goals For Yourself
Now that you know what things give you fulfillment, you need to start to create the roadmap and goals to start living out your dreams.
Often we look back on our lives and reflect and ask ourselves what have I accomplished.
You need to be able to measure your level of contentment and happiness by looking at how much do you need to live.
Fulfillment is linked to your goals, and your dreams and wishes. You will find satisfaction when you reach your goals.
Write down what you are striving for in life, and what exact steps you are going to do to get there.
– Help Someone Else Out
When you do good for others and help someone else out, whether it be just giving them company when they are alone, or lending a helping hand to someone financially, you can gain so much fulfillment from this.
When humans do good to each other, this causes a great sense of peace and happiness not just to the recipient, but to the giver as well.
To help yourself out emotionally, start doing good for others so that you can feel the rewarding feeling of giving.
Final Thoughts
To live a more fulfilled life, you need to live in the moment, in the now. You need to focus on the emotions and feelings that you are feeling inside of you, and strive to make yourself the happiest that you can be.
We all need to start enjoying each and every moment and refocus on the present time.
By bringing yourself to be grounded and live one day at a time, you slow down your life to stop looking at external ways to make ourselves happy.
You don’t need any external things to make you happy; your absolute happiness already exists right inside of you right now, it’s just up to you to want to grab it.
Maher Abiad has been in digital media and marketing since 2000. He runs his own online marketing agency named 3Seven7 Studios which helps businesses tell their stories and grow their audience through digital media marketing.
You’ve read How To Finally Find Fulfillment In An Overly Complex World, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.
Grand Canyon National Park – Arizona – USA (by Kenneth Garcia)
Grand Canyon National Park – Arizona – USA (by Kenneth Garcia)
Where to Find Friends and Support During Addiction Recovery
When you’re in rehab, you have a support system of therapists, group leaders and fellow patients. However, when you go back to your everyday life, you may suddenly find yourself alone. It can be difficult to get through work and your other responsibilities without anyone there to soothe you.
Perhaps you don’t live near family and friends, or they’re enablers. They also may just not understand what you’re going through and not be able to help. If you don’t have a therapist you see regularly either, you may feel lost.
After rehab, it’s crucial that you have a period where you can transition back into your everyday life and get on your feet again. This can be difficult to do, especially when substance abuse was your primary coping mechanism. You need people you can turn to who are reliable, as well as places you can go if you feel like you’re slipping back into your old behaviors.
Fortunately, there are a number of ways you can garner support during this tough time. The following are places to look for support during your post-rehab recovery period:
Individual or Group Therapy
Before you exit rehab, you should be set up with a private therapist who has addiction counseling experience. If that didn’t happen, ask your rehab for referrals.
Depending on your situation, you may want to visit a marriage or family therapist, too. An alternative to individual or family therapy is addiction group therapy, which may be lower in cost and give you more of a support system.
Peer-to-Peer Support Groups
Recovery support groups, or peer-to-peer groups, are essential to your recovery. It’s been proven that when you join these types of meetings, you are much more likely to stay sober. Similar to rehab, you are connected with people who are going through the same or similar situations. They’ve all struggled with addiction and know where you are coming from, so you won’t feel like an outcast or like you don’t belong. In fact, you should feel accepted and related to.
Two popular peer-to-peer groups are Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous. You can use Addiction.com’s meeting finder to determine the most convenient location for you. In AA and NA, participants stand up, explain why they are in the group and how it has changed their life, as well as what their path to recovery has been like. Then, other members can volunteer to talk about their stories too. You may even establish a relationship with a sponsor you can call if you’re in need of help or you just want to check in. These are informal settings, so there is no pressure to share or connect with a sponsor if you don’t want to.
Organizations like the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration and the National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence give you information on the various types of meetings available as well.
You may also find support within your local church, synagogue or mosque, or you can use a toll-free telephone hotline if you find yourself in need. Most of these hotlines are staffed 24/7 with helpful individuals who can give you referrals for additional support.
Your Rehab Facility
If you live near your rehab facility, they may provide support to you as part of an ongoing outpatient program. Most likely, your rehab will set you up with support outside of the facility. They will be there for you in your time of need, however, so don’t hesitate to reach out to them at any point.
A Successful Recovery Is Possible
Addiction recovery is not easy. Without the care and support of friends, family and professionals, you may feel like you can’t get through the hard times.
But don’t despair. Wherever you live, you can find a meeting, a therapist, friends, or simply pick up the phone to talk to someone on a hotline. Always remember that it’s normal to need help from a variety of sources at this time, even if it means going to groups and talking one-on-one with mental health professionals.
A full recovery outside of rehab is possible. It just takes time, patience and a little work to find the support you need to succeed.
See Also: 8 Drug Addiction Treatment Programs To Help You Break Free
The post Where to Find Friends and Support During Addiction Recovery appeared first on Dumb Little Man.
How to Make Friends
By Leo Babauta
I’m writing this guide for my kids as they grow up and go out into the world — but it’s for anyone who wants to connect with others.
I’m writing it for my teenage self, who was shy and awkward and self-conscious. I’m writing it as a reminder to my current self, who is still those things.
But I’ve been lucky enough to make a handful of good friends, awesome people who are sucking the juice out of life, who wake up every day with gratitude and energy. I’m lucky to have them, and it makes me reflect on what I’ve done right, and what they do all the time when making connections with people.
Here’s what I’ve learned. It’s not a comprehensive guide, nor will it work for everyone. I still hope it’s useful.
Guidelines for Making Friends
In my experience, people (generally) want to be friends with other people who follow these general guidelines:
- Be positive, not negative. While it’s OK to share your struggles with people (I recommend it), if you’re complaining all the time, and are generally negative about other people and life in general, then people get tired of the complaining and negativity. We have enough trouble in life without having friends who are negative all the time. That said, a good friend will always listen when you’re in need, so don’t take this as “never complain.” Instead, just generally try to be a positive person, and if you have struggles, also try to show how you’re tackling those struggles with a positive outlook.
- Be interested & a good listener. Be interested in other people! Don’t make the mistake of only wanting to talk about your stuff, and being bored and unimpressed with what other people are doing. I try to find the interesting in everyone, even if they lead a relatively uneventful life, there’s something fascinating about them. When someone wants to talk, listen. If they only talk about themselves all day and don’t want to hear your stuff, then they probably aren’t going to be a great friend, but still give them a chance and be interested for as long as you can.
- Be excited about life, have energy. We generally don’t want a friend who is bored all the time. Someone who is excited about life, interested in things, has good energy … that’s someone you’d by hyped to be around. Not super hyper, necessarily, but just containing a positive energy.
- Do interesting things. If you’re excited about life, you manifest that by doing new things, learning, creating, exploring, trying out new experiences, meeting new people. If you are this kind of person, you’ll be interesting. If you shut out life, people might not be as interested.
- Tell good stories. No one wants to listen to someone who tells long boring stories. After the first two such stories, people generally start tuning you out. So try to keep your stories shorter, unless you can tell people are interested. Find something interesting to hook their curiosity, and then draw them in with that curiosity until you satisfy it with a good ending. Practice your storytelling when you meet people, and try to get better at it. It’s not one of my strong points, to be honest, but I recognize that and am trying to be better.
- Smile. I’m not saying you should have a fake smile, but a smile puts you in a friendly mood, versus frowning at someone. Don’t smile all the time, or at inappropriate times. Just generally have a smiling disposition, as it signals that you like the person (also try to genuinely like the person, moving away from tendencies to judge them or complain about them).
- Put yourself out there, be willing to try things. Sing in public even if that scares you. Try new food, new experiences, new ideas. This open-mindedness attracts others who are looking to get the most out of life.
- Be calm, not overly dramatic. While it’s great to have a lot of energy, people who are overly dramatic about little things can be a turn-off. So learn to react to most problems as if they’re not a big deal (because they usually aren’t), and handle them with calmness instead of overreacting.
- Be authentic, don’t try to show off. All of the above recommendations might seem like I’m recommending that you be someone you’re not. I’m not recommending that at all. Instead, I want you to be an authentic version of yourself (there are lots of versions of ourselves) — but choose the version that is more in the directions recommended above, in general. If there is a positive and negative version of you, generally choose the positive version. But most importantly, don’t try to impress people all the time — if you’re confident in yourself, you don’t need to impress. Instead, be a genuine person, not just the “best you.” When this recommendation is in conflict with any of the above recommendations, choose this one.
- Be happy with yourself & confident. This is just something that’s good to do for yourself. Be happy with who you are, even the flaws. If you are, you can be confident that you’re good enough when you meet someone else. People generally don’t respect someone who is constantly harsh on themselves. How can you learn to be happy with yourself? That’s a whole other post, but in general, become aware of any tendency to be harsh and critical of yourself, and don’t let yourself stew in those kinds of thoughts. Start to see the good in yourself, the genuine heart and caring nature, and let that be the story you tell yourself about yourself.
I don’t claim to be an expert at any of this (my friend Tynan is a much better expert, and wrote an excellent book you should check out), but this is what I believe to be true right now.
I hope this helps, and if you find yourself lacking in any of these areas, see it not as confirmation that you suck, but as an exciting new area for you to explore.
The Aussie Guide to Bad Credit & What to Do About It
The funny thing about credit scores is that hardly anyone ever notices them until you need to buy a big ticket item. Swiping left and right is all fun and games until you need to make an adult purchase — like a house or a car. Chances are, you’ll need to take on a home loan or get car finance. Seems simple, right?
Now, imagine being excited to finally get the car of your dreams and then all of a sudden your application gets rejected because you have bad credit.
What does having bad credit mean?
When you try to borrow money from any institution, the deciding factor on whether or not you’ll be given a loan (or how big the loan will be) is your credit score. In the simplest sense, your credit score is the expression or representation of your trustworthiness with borrowed money from the lender’s point of view.
This score is determined by a form of point system in which the numbers are taken from your credit history. When you pull together the sum total of these points, you get a statistical “proof” of your reliability with debt.
Your score can sit anywhere between 0 and 1200. The higher your score, the higher your chances of being given a loan or finance (GOOD CREDIT). This is because higher scores generally tell financiers that you’re more likely to make repayments on time (or at all). In the same way, the lower your score, the lower your chances of getting a lease or loan, and the more wary institutions would be in lending to you (BAD CREDIT).
How do I get a good credit score?
The process of getting a good credit score is pretty straightforward. All of the basic things that lenders want you to do are already within the realm of your responsibility.
Here are few general rules for keeping a healthy credit score:
- Don’t max out your credit cards
- Make repayments on time
- Don’t skip on payments – make an arrangement
- Pay attention to notices and respond as soon as possible
- Check your credit report regularly to ensure that all information is in order
- If/as soon as you find them, fix any mistakes that have been made on your credit report
Getting a bad credit report, on the other hand, entails doing the exact opposite. If you miss out on payments or forgo them altogether, or if you keep maxing out your credit cards, you will get a bad credit score. The more late payments, maxed out cards,or notices you ignore, the more negatively impacted your credit score will be.
See Also: 4 Ways to Start Building Great Credit
How to find out if I have bad credit
The simplest way to find out is by checking your credit report. Australian credit reporting agencies like Veda should be able to help you with this. It does take a bit of time because of its application process and requirements, but this should definitely be your first step to checking for your credit health.
Even without checking your credit report, there are a few warning signs that you’re going towards the wrong end of the credit spectrum.
Pay attention if or when you start to get multiple call and letters from debt agencies. This is a tell tale sign that your score may be going lower and lower.
The same goes for having a flurry of unpaid bills, credit card defaults, overdue balances, and notices of assessment from debt collectors. You don’t have to experience all of these at the same time. Being in just one of these situations is already a red flag for your credit report.
How does bad credit affect me?
As discussed earlier, your credit score shows lenders how reliable you’ll be with repayments should they lend or loan to you. Bad credit limits your options on who to borrow from, how much will be lent to you, and the interest rates of your loan. While there are financing institutions who will give you second chance car finance or bad credit home loans, they may be a little trickier to find.
While debt and credit relations are a little more common knowledge, there are a few seemingly unrelated effects to having bad credit. Who would have thought that landlords would actually check credit before letting you sign a lease? If you find yourself having difficulties getting approved for an apartment, it may be time to check your credit score.
You’d also be surprised to know that certain jobs especially in upper management, actually require you to have a good credit history. You can be turned down for a job or promotion because of things like bankruptcy, large debts, outstanding bills, and other negative items in your credit report.
They don’t look at your scores per se, rather things that may potentially affect your job performance. The expectation is that the more personal financial problems you have, the more likely and negatively impacted your performance will be.
How do I fix my credit rating?
The whole irony of the situation is that, more often than not, you have to take on another loan to fix a credit rating that may have gone down due to previous loans. The idea is to repair your credit by showing lenders that you can use credit responsibly. The trouble is — having bad credit makes access to new credit or new loans quite difficult. This is much like the whole “Need a job for experience – need experience for a job” kind of scenario.
Before you go around looking for new loans to take out, start first with what you have. Make sure that your existing home and utility bills, phone bills, internet bills, credit card bills and other recurring bills are paid for regularly. This way you get into the habit of paying for things on time and managing your money better.
Once you’re comfortable with this new routine, start small before going big. Take out a small loan or apply for a credit card to prove that you are financially trustworthy. If you can make repayments on time, lenders may just give you the benefit of the doubt with a larger loan.
If there is a larger more immediate need, let’s say for a car for a new job, you can also go with bad credit car loan companies to help you out. Interests might be a little higher, but they do create repayment packages that make it easier for tighter cash flows.
A car lease with rent-to-own option, even from a second chance car finance company, will definitely help you boost your credit rating — if you’re always on time with repayments. It also helps you kill two birds with one stone considering you’ll be rebuilding credit while having the vehicle that you need.
See Also: 6 Step To Improve Your Credit Score Now
The post The Aussie Guide to Bad Credit & What to Do About It appeared first on Dumb Little Man.
Sig Nordal 