When your house is full of things you don’t need, and a little on the messy side, it can feel a little claustrophobic. Even enormous houses can feel small and lacking in space if there’s stuff everywhere, and if your house is on the small side, you will feel even worse.

Often we leave things until our house is so full of rubbish that we reach breaking point, and go on an epic tidying mission. Of course it’s far more sensible to clean things, throw out unwanted stuff and tidy up as you go, but unfortunately it doesn’t always happen. Life gets in the way and you put off going through that messy cupboard or your cluttered wardrobe.

Sometimes when your house is extremely cluttered, it can be difficult to know where to start. Don’t stress, you can get your house back to normal in no time, you just need to have a plan. Here’s six easy steps to help you declutter your home.

1. Collect all the clutter and organise into piles

The first thing you need to do is go around each room of your house, and pick up all the clutter. Grab everything that’s lying around and put everything into organised piles. For example, things that need to go into storage, things that can be put away, things that need to be thrown away and things that can be recycled. You will immediately feel relieved once you have gathered and organised everything.

2. Get rid of things you don’t need

One of the things people find the hardest about decluttering is being strict with getting rid of stuff. If you aren’t strict, you will end up with far too much stuff to organise, and not enough room to store everything. Go through each item, and consider whether you really need it or will ever use it. You might want to go through the clothes in your wardrobe too to free up some space.

It sometimes helps to go through stuff with someone else who can help you decide what you do and don’t need. Once you have decided what you are going to throw out, organise things into relevant piles, ready to be taken to the tip or to your local recycling centre. Don’t just throw everything away, consider whether you can give some things to charity shops so that other people can benefit from your unwanted stuff.

3. Visit your local rubbish/recycling tip

Load up everything into your car and take it to your local rubbish or recycling centre. Some people fail at this point and leave bags and boxes lying around their home. This will only stress you out and make your home feel even more cluttered. As soon as you have stuff ready to go, get rid of it. You will instantly feel much better and can return to a home that feels a lot less cluttered.

4. Give your house a deep clean

As well as clearing things out, it’s a good idea to also give your house a deep clean. Tidying up will help to declutter your home and make it a nicer place to be. There’s no point decluttering if your house is still dirty and messy afterwards.

5. Reorganise things

While you are cleaning, try and re organise things. You may want to invest in some smart storage, which will help keep things tidy and out of the way. Sometimes by simply rearranging a room you can make it feel bigger. Try rearranging your furniture, or putting things in a different order to see if it makes your home feel less cluttered.

6. Keep things tidy!

Lastly, all you have to do now is keep things tidy. Don’t ruin all your hard work by letting your house quickly return to what it used to be like. Get all household members on board and make sure everyone puts stuff away and tidies up after themselves.

The post 6 Easy Steps To Help You Declutter Your Home appeared first on Change your thoughts.

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Life has been moving along pretty nicely for awhile. Work, home life, kids, outside interests. Day in and day out, life goes on and for the most part, it’s been pretty good. Suddenly you start feeling different. Things are shifting. Your days suddenly seem like they are missing something. There is something funky going on and you can’t quite put your finger on it. You could be on the edge of a major shift.

According to research and human studies, every 7 years we go through a new life cycle. This could be a growth spurt, a mindset shift or anything else of that nature. You might be right at the very edge of your own major life shift. But how would you know for sure?

1. You’re starting to feel antsy.

Your work, your career, the way you make money, and everything else to do with your job and your income is suddenly up for question . You’ve had this job for awhile and you’ve been satisfied with it, for the most part, no major complaints but for the last few months now, something is off. It just doesn’t feel right anymore. You feel like you should be doing more or something else.

2. You are no longer interested in hanging with your group of friends.

You are realizing that they are stagnating and you are progressing, if even only in your mind right now. Your thought processes lately are very expansive. You are looking into bigger and bolder things in life. You are more interested in personal development or growing as a person spiritually or maybe even professionally and your friends just aren’t on that same thought pattern.

3. That feeling.

There is some commotion going on in your gut. Almost an anxiety or restlessness that you can’t quite put your finger on. It’s been stirring for awhile now and it’s almost forcing you to take some sort of action, any action. Nothing sits right anymore and anything you want to do or try to do just doesn’t seem right. The things you used to do that seemed normal suddenly feel useless and like time wasted.

4. Your interests have changed.

It used to be loads of fun to go in the park and fly a kite. For some reason, it just doesn’t interest you anymore. Whatever that thing is that is stirring in your gut is constantly reminding you and telling you that things are changing and you need to start rolling with the changes. Things that you never used to give any thought to whatsoever are suddenly coming up for you as things you might want to explore.

5. Research and read.

You are finding yourself spending more time on the internet surfing sites and in the library reading up on different things. different countries, different people, different lifestyles. You have acquired some unexplainable thirst of knowledge for things. cultures, people, things, food, animals, you name it, your mind is wandering. Something is going on. You are on a must know journey.

That feeling mentioned in #3 is very undeniable. It gnaws at you, poke s at you and will not leave you alone for one moment until you address it. When we are on the edge of a shift, we feel it at a vibrational level as well. The energy around you, your body is real and you feel it. That’s the energy that is telling you to move. It is trying to bring awareness to you that you need to move and until you do, it will continue to vibrate, quite loudly, until you act upon it. To explain it simpler, it’s that gut feeling, magnified. Pay attention to it, address it, find out what it is and act on it.

There is something shifting in you and around you and it’s your life. It is calling to you for change. Major change. Don’t fear it, embrace it.

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We’ve all been there. Fall in love, hang out there for awhile, a few months or years later, it falls apart, we break up, and then spend the next 2 years or more going back and forth, back and forth. We’re together, we’re not, we’re together, we’re not. It really is just a vicious cycle after awhile and one that we actually get so accustomed to, we just keep living it and hanging on to it. But why do we keep going back and how do we stop this cycle?

Going back to anything is done from our comfort zone. It was comfortable, we were safe there and we like to stay there. We don’t necessarily like it but change is far scarier. So we go back and forth. For a very long time. How do we stop this and why should we anyway?

1. Going back means back to the same old things.

If you think anything has changed you’re fooling yourself. We go back with empty promises of love and promises to do and be better. That usually lasts anywhere from 3-8 months before it all falls apart and goes right back to how it was. Nothing changes if nothing changes. Change has to take place inside and has to be sincere and assured. But you both have to want to change things that aren’t working or even toxic behaviours that maybe you are displaying (anger issues, lying issues, etc.). If neither one of you are ready to make these changes, you are going back to the same old stuff. What’s the point?

2. It’s time for something new.

By new I don’t just mean new partner. I mean new life. Going back brings you back to the old. It will be all fun and exciting an d new for the first few months but eventually you will end up with the same old routine you left. New is stepping out of and away from the safe zone. You know you want something new and better and different but you will never have it if you keep going back. Start moving forward instead and watch what happens.

3. Self worth and values will never grow.

If you left due to values and self worth issues, they will not change or grow if you keep going back. You left because you were being mentally, verbally and or emotionally abused. You were not treated with the respect, love and care you deserve. If your partner hasn’t changed or sought help for this bullying, you are just going back to the same treatment.  It didn’t go away when you left. It’s still there and will always be there until it is fixed.

4. Enabler.

Your partner has agreed and promised to do better. Many many times and you keep believing him/her, you go back and nothing has changed. You stay for a year, leave again, same promises, and you go back, repeat. See the pattern? Why should they change? You keep believing their empty promises which means the behaviour never has to change because you will return no matter what, even on false promises and they know that. This will never end. Why should it? They win, no matter what. Put your foot down and leave for good. Stop enabling lying behaviour.

5. You’re keeping yourself from a beautiful happy life.

And we all deserve happiness. All of us. The happiness you seek and deserve will never be found in the partner you keep returning to and you know that. Why did you leave and why do you keep leaving in the first place? If you were and are happy in that relationship, you would never leave anyway, so what makes you leave? You leave because you aren’t happy. Plain and simple. You won’t get happiness there. It’s an inside job.

Going back and forth with your ex is really just a waste of time if neither one of you have taken measures to improve your lives in any way shape or form. If you want to stay together, then work together to improve and work on the problems you two are experiencing. If only one of you is making changes and the other isn’t, that’s not a relationship. you are worthy of love and happiness. Make sure you seek it from within and walk away from anything that keeps you from that.

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June is drawing close, this is about the time New Year’s resolutions are laid to rest.

Buried under piles and piles of ‘to-dos’, the busy-ness of life and a waning belief in ourselves—that we can really ‘do it’ (clean eating and toned bodies are, after all, things that only happen to other people).

But…you know that something’s got to change. You can tell, because:  You’re growing more and more uncomfortable in your own body as the months go by—the lingering lethargy, your growing waistline and uneasy dissatisfaction with how your clothes fit are crawling under your skin. You’re enjoying your food a little too much. In fact, you enjoy it so much that you turn to it whenever you’re feeling stressed or anxious. You’re also starting to feel anxious around food because it’s all you seem to think about 24/7.

So how do you get back on horse without falling off again just weeks or months later?

Here are five things that help get me back on my feet and moving forward when my journey towards my goals come to a halt:

1. I recognize that relying only on motivation is futile

I used to think that motivation was this bright, fiery flame of desire to do what’s good for me that would always be with me no matter what I did because well, if it’s important enough, you should want to do it all the time…right?

Not really. Now with more experience under my belt, I’ve come to realize that this desire tends to come and go over time. There will be highs where I feel like I’m on a  roll, but there will also be slumps where I’ll feel like jumping off the horse because it feels like too much work to stay on it.

What really matters is that I make the decision to get back on the horse after I’ve jumped off it.

2. I re-connect with my big ‘why’

When I find myself reaching for the late-night pizza a little too often, or feel like I’m losing my will to keep up with my workouts, what gets me going again is to re-connect with my purpose, my big ‘why’.

Why did I start out on this journey in the first place?

Digging deep and re-focusing my attention on why I’m doing what I set out to do (hint: It’s rarely just about weight loss or other surface goals) get my feet moving even though they feel like lead, and keep me going even when I don’t feel like it, because it’s not just something I have to do—it’s who I want to BE.

3. I focus on the ‘doing’

This one’s difficult to do, especially when your heart’s not in it, but I find that once I get my body going, my heart follows, I always end up feeling glad that I did.

The recurring big lesson that I’ve learned from following through with this step over and over again? It’s that the worst thing you can do when you’re feeling unmotivated is to spend your time over-thinking things. It paralyzes you and keeps you stuck in a place of inaction.

The best thing you can do in instances like this is to just get up and start taking action. Chances are high that just the simple act of ‘doing’ will help you re-gain the motivation and momentum you’re looking for.

4. I give myself permission to take a break

When I feel like putting one foot in front of the other feels almost impossible, I give myself permission to take a step back and take a break from certain things, like my intense workouts or putting pressure on myself to eat clean all the time.

Giving up on myself is never an option, but taking time out when I need it, is.

These ‘mental health’ breaks can range from a few days to a week or a couple of months, and to me, they’re crucial for dealing with and recuperating from life’s ups and downs, as well as giving my body and mind the space it needs to re-group, recover and re-gain the strength I need to feel ‘OK’ again.

5. I have an ‘emergency’ self-care ritual at the ready

When my motivation is dipping dangerously low, I sometimes forget about trying to get it back, I forget about the ‘shoulds’ and instead, turn to a gentler, more holistic and loving way of accomplishing my mission: A self-care ritual that I know will help me feel better and gradually help me get back 100%.

After all, the reason we’re driven to do the ‘right’ things are rarely just about calories, the exercises or chalking up 10,000 steps a day—it’s usually a part of a bigger puzzle that we’re trying to piece together.

My ritual is a three-point checklist that I tick off throughout the day (somewhat like a self-care instruction manual) so that I don’t have to think about it. And, it simplifies the get-well process with just these non-negotiables:

• Nourish: I’m not a fan of complicated recipes and so I eat foods that are simple to prepare and help me feel good in my body, as well as about my body. If a food triggers addictive tendencies (for example, sugary pastries and white bread) in me, I keep it out of my home.
• Move: I don’t exercise with the intention of becoming ripped, the strongest, fastest or fittest; I do it to allow myself to feel capable in my body and live life on my terms. When I can’t bring myself to go for my usual intense, CrossFit workouts, I don’t. I stretch, do yoga or simply walk. It’s my body and my rules.
• Sleep: Not getting enough good quality sleep can throw my entire day off balance, so I do my best to make sure that my entire day works around the aim of sleeping well at night. And this in itself often helps me make the right decisions, health-wise.

Do you feel like you’re losing your motivation to stick with your healthy habits? Which of these five strategies can you see yourself putting into action get it back? Share them in the comments section below.

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No one wants to think like this. For many of us, we knew a long time ago it was over but ending it can be more dreadful than the sadness you feel living through the relationship from hell. Leaving is never easy, no matter how long you’ve been involved. We’d rather just stay and put up then have to write the Dear John/Jane letter and move on.

Do you know when it’s time to leave? Are you hanging on for the wrong reasons? What are you hanging for anyway? Sometimes we hang on because we think we can change our partner or perhaps we hold on to hope that their behaviour will change. But how long do we hold on for, really? What are the signs that indicate that it really is time to write the letter?

1. Intimacy has long been gone.

No kissing, no hand holding, nothing. That ended a long time ago and affection left with it. Intimacy is more than sex. It’s about being affectionate and showing love other ways. When that’s gone, and has been for a long time, it may be time.

2. Conversation is also non-existent.

You two really just don’t have anything to talk about and quite possibly no longer have anything in common. That happens often as people grow and change, our interests change as well while our partner changes in other ways.

3. Being in the same room makes you uncomfortable.

You are starting to have feelings of dislike for you partner and no longer even want to be in the same room as them. If this isn’t a clear enough sign for you to leave then who knows what is.

4. Go your separate ways.

Meaning you no longer go to places together anymore. He goes to his friend’s; you go to yours. There is no interest in going anywhere as a couple anymore. All you do is fight when you get there or ignore each other, so you don’t even bother. What’s the point?

5. Fights, many fights.

All the time. You fight so much now you even fight about things that aren’t even worth fighting for. We still hang on though because many of us still think deep down in our hearts things just might get better. Yet the fights continue.

6. You prefer to spend time alone, away from your partner.

You actually enjoy solitude more than his/her companionship. Seeking peace and quiet is more satisfying to you then spending time with them.

7. Signs of disrespect are starting.

The name calling, inconsiderate acts of selfishness, belittling each other and other signs of disrespect, at one time, used to be few and far bet ween but are now happening with much more frequency.

8. Counselling should be considered but is not an option.

One of you wants to go, the other doesn’t see the need. You know that professional help is required but both parties have to want it. When only one wants to go, the other clearly has no interest in making things better.

9. Saying I love you rarely occurs.

You’re not even really sure you feel it anymore. Sure, you love the person who you fell in love with 5, 10 or 15 years ago but it’s not the same kind of love anymore. There is no deep meaningful love and you doubt you will ever have it again.

10. Sadness has taken over.

Where there used to be joy and happiness is now sad and empty. You feel nothing anymore but sadness. There is no love, no laughing, no connections. It’s all gone and has been replaced with loneliness and emptiness.

When we start experiencing any of these signs, and counselling is not an option, it just may be time to pack that bag and go one. Hanging on to something that cannot be fixed is simply a waste of precious life. You are here to live in love and joy. Not sadness and misery. Talk and fix it or leave. This is the only life you have. Be happy.

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I think we all, at one point in our lives, have suffered or experienced some anxiety. Whether it be the anxiety just before getting in front of a group of people to do a speech or maybe even just before you board a plane. We’ve all felt it. Some of us feel it far worse than others. But how do we know if this is chronic anxiety?

Anxiety is that feeling of overwhelm and nervousness which can sometimes be coupled with nausea or trouble breathing. Some even experience extreme chest pains. So are you a chronic anxiety sufferer or is it just very random for you? Let’s have a look at some signs that just may determine what state of anxiety you may be experiencing.

1. You are always stressed, nervous, tense or worried.

These feelings are constant and rarely go away. You worry about tomorrow, today and yesterday. You always have the feeling of gloom and doom and have a sense that something bad is always going to happen. It’s very hard for you to relax ever, and even sleeping is very troublesome for you.

2. You avoid a lot of different places and or events because you feel too much stress about it.

The people who will be there, the food, the crowd, the embarrassment to something that might not even happen. It’s all too overwhelming for you. You would just rather stay home. The thought of people talking about you or making fun of you horrifies you so you avoid all places. Making friends is not easy for you.

3. Being an introvert, on a whole different level.

You avoid people for fear of not being liked, saying the wrong thing, not fitting in, peer pressure, being rejected and many other self esteem issues that may arise. It’s not that you don’t like people. You really do and wish you could hang out with them more, it’s just too stressful for you.

4. Severe chest pains.

You get these a lot. This doesn’t happen just before an anxiety filled event either but it seems it happens more often than not. Sometimes just making it to the corner store can cause these heart pounding attacks. It is that feeling of someone c rushing your chest. It’s scary, terrifying actually, and you truly feel like you are having a heart attack.

5. Many fears.

But not just fear of spiders and snakes. Bigger fears of things that probably aren’t really scary at all but you’ve taken them and turned them into a horrifying object or event simply because of the way the mind works. Our mind tells us that it is bad, scary, it will go wrong, something terrible will happen, stay away, don’t touch it, etc. We talk ourselves into gloom and doom, no matter what. Bad things are going to happen, regardless, so we are afraid of just about everything.

Do you recognize yourself in any of these signs? If you do, you most likely suffer from an extreme form of anxiety disorder and if you aren’t seeking help or trying to manage it yet, you should be. Anxiety is no joke and can be very debilitating. For those who don’t suffer from this, understanding it is very difficult. There is always help, and not only prescription drugs, for disorders such as t his.

Don’t wait to seek help. Your life is worth it.

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You might be attracting the wrong people into your life.

Are you asking yourself a reasonable question? “What is it with these people?

Why are they so wrong for me and why does the same kind of person keep showing up?”

If you’re attracting characters who won’t stay long, commitment-phobes or insensitive jerks, you have to ask yourself what’s going on.

The types of people you’re attracting in to your life (if the same ones) might have little to do with them and more to do with you. It’s time to stop for a second and see what’s going on.

How do you break the pattern of attracting terrible partners?

Here’s 5 tips to stop dating the wrong people.

Look for patterns.

Check in with yourself to see if you can notice the patterns in the people you’re dating. What does each person have in common with the other? What characteristics or physical attributes do they share? What personality traits? What common quality do all these people have?

Look for common factors in your attraction to the people you’re dating. Acknowledge the patterns and become aware of them in the potential partners you meet.

Look for triggers.

Think about the common characteristics or life stories the people you date share.

Whatever the trigger point, start becoming more aware of this trigger point when you meet someone. Ask them specifically about their past, their upbringing or triggers that you notice.

Look for similar character traits from previous partners who hurt you or treated you poorly.

Be aware and actively look for trigger points that are signs of bad things to come. They’re always there, but you might be choosing to ignore them for the sake of finding love.

Consciously make a shift.

Honor yourself by weeding out this group of people from your life. Promise yourself to pass on these characters no matter how good they may initially seem to you, no matter how good looking, charming or outgoing they might be.

Instead of focusing what it is you don’t want, visualize an image of a person you do want.

Be more aware of the qualities and characteristics you’re looking for and look out for those characteristics instead.

Be more aware and more intentional.

Don’t let attention or flirtation hypnotize you to the point that you can’t say “no.”

Now that you’re aware of who’s right for you and who’s not, be on the lookout for the right kind of lover.

Don’t go with the flow. Don’t meet and date on auto-pilot or cruise-control.

Allow your intuition to lead and this time, listen to it. If you’re not feeling good about the person or his behaviors, get out quick. You’ve been down this path before and it has never worked out well.

Practice saying “no.”

Saying “no” is hard, especially when you want a partner in your life, but if you get more intentional and conscious in your relationships, this will be easier to do.

Why should you say “no” often to the people who are not a fit for you?

One, you’ll weed out the bad apples, thus avoiding repeated frustration and heartbreak. You’ll break the pattern of jerks and losers who hurt you.

Two, you’ll keep your life clear to meet the right person for you. If you’ve filled your life with deadbeats and are preoccupied with the ho-hum, you won’t allow that ideal partner to come into your life.

Practice saying “no” with discipline and confidence.  Be aware that each “no” to the wrong person will bring you closer to the right one!

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Whether we need cheering up or just a bit of a jolt during that 2:00 pm afternoon slump, every now and then we all need a little mood boosting. The best part of mood boosting, in my opinion, is that it could actually be a whole lot of fun.

Many of us reach for a beverage to boost our moods, whether it be coffee, tea or wine or scotch. Whatever the case may be, here are a few more ideas to help you boost that mood without having to nose dive into alcohol or caffeine.

1. Essential oils.

Lavender and or lemongrass are great oils to sniff if you need a quick pick me up. There are many other brilliant oils that have other benefits besides mood boosting so you may want to try many.

2. Go to a dog park.

If you’re into furry critters. The next time you are feeling glum or down in the dumps go to your neighbourhood dog park and watch dogs run around, play and be goofy. It’s always a good time when we go.

3. Go visit a senior’s centre.

No one will be happier to see you then a lonely senior. Many of them never get any visitors so having some one come to see them, maybe even bring some cookies or a treat and sit with them and talk is the best thing you can do not only for them but for you too.

4. Have a power nap.

When you’re so down, sometimes the only thing you can do and the best cure is a power nap. It could be 15 minutes or 2 hours. Go lay down an d decompress. It’s a clear sign it’s time to shut the mind down.

5. A good cry.

Nothing like having a good emotional dump to remove all the toxins building up inside of you. Crying is very therapeutic and should never be held back. If you feel like crying, just do it. Too many of us hold back our tears. This is a bad idea. Let them flow.

6. Watch fish swim.

Not in the ocean or in a lake but in an aquarium. A fish tank is one of the best therapies for a bad mood. Even if you are feeling sad or grumpy. Go watch some fish swim around and be soothed by the sound of the bubbling water and the mot ion of the fish. Better yet, get yourself one.

7. Plug in and crank the volume.

Grab your iPod, your mp3 player or turn up your stereo. Whatever form you listen to your music on, turn it up. A sad song, a happy song, the heaviest metal song you have. Listen to it loud and sing along. Best therapy ever.

8. Chocolate please.

For those of us who can’t live without chocolate, the best time to have some is when you are in a funky mood or need a happy boost. The delectable goodness of chocolate will cheer up even the grumpiest of people.

9. Call a friend.

We all have that one friend we can pick up the phone and call no matter what time of day it is. They are there, no matter what. Almost like a stand by friend, but they really do love you and care for you. Call them up. They are happy to cheer you up.

10. Road trip anyone?

Even if you don’t own a car, go for a walk, get a taxi, subway, train, bus, whatever it takes. Get on a means of transportation and go on a short mindless journey. It is usually on these random journeys that we can solve most of the world’s problems anyway.

This is my short list though there are so many more ideas out there. What are some of your tips and tricks to boost your mood? Share them with the others.

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You know you care. You feel it in your heart all the time. The love you feel for someone whether it be your partner, your child, your best friend or whoever. This person is super special to you and you care about them deeply. Oftentimes though, we forget to show people that we do care or we take it for granted that they know we care and feel we don’t have to do anything to prove it or show it.

For the most part, you really don’t have to prove you care. You know you do, they know you do and that should be enough, right? Well, it is enough, really but every now and then it’s nice to show people so they don’t think we have forgotten or are taking for granted that they know and that’s all that matters. Here are a few simple, yet loving ways to show you care, so they don’t forget. It also makes them feel a little extra special and let’s face it, sometimes we need those little subtle acts.

1. The I love you text.

Simple, effective. Who doesn’t love to get a random text from someone special that simply says I love you? This doesn’t have to be just your partner it could be your best friend, sister or anyone you love really.

2. Bring treats.

You know what their favourite tea or cookie is. Make a special trip that café up the street that sells them, get one and bring it to them. Want to make it even more special? Stick a bow on it. Why not?

3. Pick up the phone and call them.

Texting is quick easy and fun but there’s nothing like hearing someone’s voice on the phone. That’s the kind of special act that puts a song in our heart and a skip in our step.

4. Grab them for a random road trip.

Text your friend, tell her be ready in 5 minutes, pick her up and hit the open road. If your friend has been low lately, this will certainly pick up her spirits and show her that you care.

5. Music is therapy.

Download their favourite song and email it to them or share it with them on their FB page. Music makes everyone feel love and happy. They will know you have been thinking of them and that you go the extra mile for them.

6. Happy notes.

This could be a love note or an inspirational note or maybe even just a fun cute note to make them giggle. Stick it in their coat pocket, their lunch pail, tape it to their cell phone cover or wherever you know they will find it easily. We all love fun notes.

7. Offer your time.

You are both super busy with work and family but every now and then one of you crashes. Go and sit with them for half an hour or half a day, without them asking you to and just listen to them or hold them or do whatever they need you to do or be for them.

8. Take them somewhere they have always wanted to go.

I don’t mean Paris or Ireland, unless of course you have the means, then, by all means, but maybe they just really want to go to the movies or out to dinner. Either take them there yourself or buy them a gift certificate so they can do that with a family member or someone else.

9. Give them praise or compliments.

Maybe they just faced one of their fears or achieved something that they’ve been meaning to do for a long time. Or maybe they haven’t done anything but they are just a super awesome person. Let them know. Don’t be afraid to tell them just how fantastic they really are.

10. Mail them a card.

You know, like snail mail, through the post office with a stamp on it. These days the only thing we get in the mail is junk and bills. Wouldn’t it be nice to receive a cute loving and fun card? I know I sure would love to receive something like that.

There are many ways to make someone feel special, quite possibly, millions. These are just a few ways I could think of. Some cost a few dollars, others are free. Use your imagination. What are some of the ways you can think of to make someone feel special? Share below!

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Do you hear voices in your head?

Believe it or not, we all do. We all have a continual voice that comments endlessly on everything around us. If we’re having difficulty with a co-worker or family member, the voice starts imaginary arguments with them in our head. If we’re afraid of a challenging task, the voice tells us why we won’t succeed.

Michael Singer, author of The Untethered Soul, calls this voice “your inner roommate.” He points out that if you had a real roommate that was as critical, judgmental, and endlessly complainy as that inner voice, you’d throw him out tomorrow, with all his smelly laundry.

Getting rid of the inner voice isn’t so easy, because we tend to believe what we think. We accept what that inner voice tells us, even when it’s self-defeating thoughts like, “You’ll never succeed,” “You can’t lose weight,” or “You’ll always be depressed.”

The fantastically good news is that you don’t have to believe everything you think! In order to change our thoughts, though, we must first become aware of those thoughts. We have to “hear” the inner voice, and decide whether we want to believe what it’s telling us.

Over the years, I have developed a series of mental shortcuts – I call them “mind hacks” – for developing better thought habits.

Here are a few easy mind hacks to help you develop that awareness of your own inner voice.

Mind Hack #1: What Was My Mind Just Thinking?

The first mind hack is so easy that you can practice it today. For the next 24 hours, simply ask yourself, as often as possible,“What was my mind just thinking?”

If you’re doing the laundry and worrying about an upcoming project, mentally say, “Worry.” If you’re commuting to work and thinking about a conversation you had last week, say “Conversation.”

Every time you remember to “check in” on your mind, award yourself an Awareness Point. At the end of 24 hours, write down your score. Pretend like it’s a game, and the object is to beat your own high score.

This mind hack sounds easy, and it is … for about an hour. Most people forget to keep playing, because they get lost in the mind again! Checking in on your mind regularly develops the “muscle” of mental awareness, so you can see your thoughts more clearly, and change them more easily.

Mind Hack #2: Getting Into the Balcony

Imagine yourself in a theater, with your mind sitting on a stage, illuminated by a bright spotlight. Now imagine yourself sitting in a balcony, looking down on your mind. You have a terrific view, and can see everything going on in there: the hopes, dreams, fears, anxieties, and all the other thoughts and emotions playing out on stage.

This is a useful mental technique whenever you notice yourself feeling worried, anxious, or depressed about something. Get into the balcony. Look down on your mind, and see it from a higher perspective.

From the balcony, you can see the drama as it’s playing out. If you’re obsessing about your spouse or partner, you can see how the mind is playing out an angry or fearful future. If you can’t let go of an argument you had with a friend, you can see how the mind is triggering those emotions in an endless loop. You don’t have to get caught up in it!

Getting into the balcony lets us look at the mind from a higher level. It helps us get free from our thoughts. Once we get free from our thoughts, we can begin to change them. We can rewrite the script.

Mind Hack #3: The Transcription

Imagine they’ve developed a speech recognition technology, like the kind on your smartphone, but it works in your head. Every thought you have gets translated into words. At the end of the day, you get a big stack of printouts that represents your entire inner conversation for the past 24 hours.

As you read through this transcription, what does it say? Is your mental dialogue harsh and critical, or is it helpful and kind? Does it complain about others, or does it lift them up? Is the overall dialogue destructive, or is it constructive?

If you’re visually-oriented, you can even picture the transcription in real time. When you find yourself wrestling with uncomfortable thoughts, imagine them being transcribed and printed out, in real time. What are the thoughts saying? What would you say to someone who said those things to you?

I once heard someone say, “No one will ever talk to me as unkindly as I talk to myself.” Once we become aware of the things our mind is telling us about ourselves and others — once we “hear” that inner voice — we can start to change those thoughts.

And as Steven would say, once you change your thoughts, you change your life.

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