5 Daily Habits That Will Transform Your Life (And How To Adopt Them)

You’re reading 5 Daily Habits That Will Transform Your Life (And How To Adopt Them), originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Peter Economy is quoted as saying that “habit building (and breaking) is one of the hardest things we can do, but it’s also (very) important for our long term success and happiness”. He’s not wrong. When you’re trying to escape from old habits the road can be a long one. With the right mindset, however, your life will undoubtedly be filled with successes. You’ll be able to attribute those successes to new habits in your life.

But where do you even start with habit building? There are lots of places to start that can get you set off in the wrong direction and with the wrong frame of mind. That’s why we’ve come up with 5 habits for you to perform each day that are easy to start and easier to keep up with.

Make a Morning Routine

One of the simplest things you can do to pre-emptively improve your life is to make a morning routine. The 2018 diary from Saint Belford is a big advocate for this. This could involve waking up earlier and writing 500 words (on no set topic), taking a stroll, making a to-do list for the day, taking an icy shower to wake up, or quietly meditating. We often get sucked into the snooze alarm vortex, which can throw off entire days of positive energy if we aren’t careful. Making a new morning routine is as easy as setting your alarm to go off 30 minutes earlier tomorrow morning.

Set Daily Goals & Review Them

This is a nice addition to the first habit. As mentioned, it’s good to try and set a to-do list up right when you rise in the morning. This doesn’t take a long time at all. Maybe 5 to 10 minutes at the most. Be sure to take the time each morning to set up what you need to accomplish each day. With a concrete list, you’ll stay on task and get the satisfaction of stroking off a goal once it’s completed.

At the end of each day – before bed – go over your list of goals again. Whether they’re your goals for today, for the week, the month, or the year, you should take some time to look over them. If you want to achieve them, you need to focus on them as much as you can. Set your mind to “achieve mode” so that these goals are always on your mind – whether consciously or unconsciously.

Focus on One Goal At a Time

It can be tempting to try and do many things at once – especially if you’re on a deadline or you’re stressed out. Working on more than one goal at a time can spread thin your focus and energy, which you need to achieve a goal in the first place.

Instead of multitasking, try single-tasking and work on one goal at a time. You can break that goal into smaller parts in order to achieve it, but be laser focused on that specific goal. By doing this, you’re more likely to accomplish it and stroke it from your list of goals.

Exercise

When making a monthly, yearly, or 5-year plan, many people will include something about “getting in shape” or “losing X amount of kilograms”. Exercise is one of the best daily habits you can form. Just ask Mark Zuckerberg and Richard Branson.

The only thing stopping you from making exercise a daily habit is you. Daily exercise comes in many forms and can start very small. Take a walk as part of your morning routine, or join a weekly or bi-weekly class at the gym. Stretching and yoga are excellent options too. Surfing tends to cleanse the soul as well (if that’s what you’re into of course). Regular exercise clears your mind and reduces stress, making it an excellent daily habit to form.

De-Clutter

Lastly, having a clean workplace makes thinking and working a lot less stressful. Get in the habit of thinking minimally when it comes to your workspace. A notepad, a pen, your laptop, your phone…you don’t need much more to get work done. Invest in a program like Evernote to store your important files, keeping them handy without them taking up any desk space.

Old Habits Die Hard, New Habits Live Long

These are just 5 daily habits that have worked for us. By making them part of your daily routine you’ll be surprised just how full of positivity your life will be. With a new set of habits under your belt, your goals will be accomplished faster than you’d imagined, and your headspace will be clearer than ever.

 

You’ve read 5 Daily Habits That Will Transform Your Life (And How To Adopt Them), originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

http://ift.tt/2vZCKt6

5 Daily Habits That Will Transform Your Life (And How To Adopt Them)

You’re reading 5 Daily Habits That Will Transform Your Life (And How To Adopt Them), originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Peter Economy is quoted as saying that “habit building (and breaking) is one of the hardest things we can do, but it’s also (very) important for our long term success and happiness”. He’s not wrong. When you’re trying to escape from old habits the road can be a long one. With the right mindset, however, your life will undoubtedly be filled with successes. You’ll be able to attribute those successes to new habits in your life.

But where do you even start with habit building? There are lots of places to start that can get you set off in the wrong direction and with the wrong frame of mind. That’s why we’ve come up with 5 habits for you to perform each day that are easy to start and easier to keep up with.

Make a Morning Routine

One of the simplest things you can do to pre-emptively improve your life is to make a morning routine. The 2018 diary from Saint Belford is a big advocate for this. This could involve waking up earlier and writing 500 words (on no set topic), taking a stroll, making a to-do list for the day, taking an icy shower to wake up, or quietly meditating. We often get sucked into the snooze alarm vortex, which can throw off entire days of positive energy if we aren’t careful. Making a new morning routine is as easy as setting your alarm to go off 30 minutes earlier tomorrow morning.

Set Daily Goals & Review Them

This is a nice addition to the first habit. As mentioned, it’s good to try and set a to-do list up right when you rise in the morning. This doesn’t take a long time at all. Maybe 5 to 10 minutes at the most. Be sure to take the time each morning to set up what you need to accomplish each day. With a concrete list, you’ll stay on task and get the satisfaction of stroking off a goal once it’s completed.

At the end of each day – before bed – go over your list of goals again. Whether they’re your goals for today, for the week, the month, or the year, you should take some time to look over them. If you want to achieve them, you need to focus on them as much as you can. Set your mind to “achieve mode” so that these goals are always on your mind – whether consciously or unconsciously.

Focus on One Goal At a Time

It can be tempting to try and do many things at once – especially if you’re on a deadline or you’re stressed out. Working on more than one goal at a time can spread thin your focus and energy, which you need to achieve a goal in the first place.

Instead of multitasking, try single-tasking and work on one goal at a time. You can break that goal into smaller parts in order to achieve it, but be laser focused on that specific goal. By doing this, you’re more likely to accomplish it and stroke it from your list of goals.

Exercise

When making a monthly, yearly, or 5-year plan, many people will include something about “getting in shape” or “losing X amount of kilograms”. Exercise is one of the best daily habits you can form. Just ask Mark Zuckerberg and Richard Branson.

The only thing stopping you from making exercise a daily habit is you. Daily exercise comes in many forms and can start very small. Take a walk as part of your morning routine, or join a weekly or bi-weekly class at the gym. Stretching and yoga are excellent options too. Surfing tends to cleanse the soul as well (if that’s what you’re into of course). Regular exercise clears your mind and reduces stress, making it an excellent daily habit to form.

De-Clutter

Lastly, having a clean workplace makes thinking and working a lot less stressful. Get in the habit of thinking minimally when it comes to your workspace. A notepad, a pen, your laptop, your phone…you don’t need much more to get work done. Invest in a program like Evernote to store your important files, keeping them handy without them taking up any desk space.

Old Habits Die Hard, New Habits Live Long

These are just 5 daily habits that have worked for us. By making them part of your daily routine you’ll be surprised just how full of positivity your life will be. With a new set of habits under your belt, your goals will be accomplished faster than you’d imagined, and your headspace will be clearer than ever.

 

You’ve read 5 Daily Habits That Will Transform Your Life (And How To Adopt Them), originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

http://ift.tt/2vZCKt6

5 Signs Your Therapy Is Working

You’re reading 5 Signs Your Therapy Is Working, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Most people take that initial plunge into therapy with the highest of hopes. We want to make real changes in our lives. We want to be more successful. We want to be in control of our emotions. In short, we want to BE better than we are today, right at this very moment.

For therapists, it’s a requirement of their own success to ensure that they are providing treatment that will steer their patients toward a positive outcome. When they finally see that something “clicks” during treatment, it’s more than just the stereotypical light bulb coming on. It’s validation that their methods are improving their patient’s lives.

But once we start putting in all of that effort as a patient, how do we know that our hard work is paying off? Everyone likes a little positive reinforcement every now and then, right? So, let’s take a look at a few tell-tale signs that we are all moving in the right direction.

Your Relationships With Others Are Improving

As a patient progresses in their treatment, one of the first noticeable improvements is in interaction with others and how relationships are maintained. While we all experience problems at work with clashing personalities or that relative that just pushes your buttons every year during the holidays, what matters is our reaction to them.

As patients work through their therapy and discover underlying causes for not necessarily always reacting to others in the most positive of ways, then the motivation behind their actions will change. Relationships will grow stronger, which in turn, will support the overall mental health of the patient. Patients will find that they are building nurturing, positive relationships, rather than negative, destructive ones.

During this process, therapists will be able to set forth a treatment plan, focusing on relationship goals and how the patient will build new relationships and repair existing problems. This is also a time period when the therapist can see the progress that has been made with his or her techniques, especially if the patient is working with the therapist toward this outcome.

Your Overall Health Is Growing Stronger

When we are physically unhealthy, there can be many underlying reasons. You can probably think about that one person at the office who always seem to catch the latest bug that’s going around, or, no matter if it’s allergy season or not, always has the sniffles. Our mental health can most definitely be a contributing factor to how easily or often we experience illness.

However, not only can our mental health affect our susceptibility to a sickness, but it can also be an underlying cause. The New York Times recently published a post that discusses  how mental health disorders can affect a patient’s physical health in two primary ways. Mental health conditions may mask a physical ailment with depression or anxiety, not allowing the clinician to give the proper diagnosis, or they can actually be the direct cause of the ailment.

A therapist or other mental health professional can research these issues and determine whether a psychological problem is in fact a primary cause for a patient’s condition, or if it could be a side effect of a physical illness. As the patient’s physical health strengthens, the therapist and primary care physician can often work hand-in-hand to determine a course of treatment that benefits both conditions. Integrated care is so instrumental in the healthcare realm.

You Are Taking Responsibility for Your Actions

As you therapy continues, you should soon find that you no longer find it comforting to “play the blame game”. Often, when we are trying to make excuses for our own actions or our poor behavior, we tend to try to rationalize certain situations or scenarios. We can do this within our own minds, or we can express these “excuses” openly to anyone who will listen.

When we finally start admitting that there is no real rationale for a sudden burst of emotion or a day spent in bed with the covers pulled over our heads, a therapist can then begin to dig into the real reason that we are finding certain actions so difficult to take responsibility for. This can be a real process to work through, especially if this is breaking decades worth of self denial. Many therapists will implement behavioral assessments to further monitor your progress.

However, in the end, the benefits are endless. You’ll find that you spend way more time ensuring that you make the best decisions possible, rather than clocking in hours trying to come up with reasons to offset your mistakes. Plus, you’ll even find that, after some work, this will all become second nature

You Are Clearing Up the Clutter

Therapy can work some real magic, but anyone who has ever been in a therapeutic environment knows that you have to put in the work. There has never been a better example of “you get what you put in” than your personal therapy treatment. Yet, this new take on things will begin to spread into other facets of your everyday lives as well.

Let’s look at the mind. By removing all of the things that take up space, like worries over difficult relationships or anxiety over repeated poor decision making, you can free up plenty of room for all of the important things in you life. Think of it as a bit of spring cleaning for the mind!

Your therapist will also love you when you get to this point. You will think more clear-mindedly, enabling a clinician to really understand your thought processes and better set forth a line of treatment to address your particular mental health condition.

Engagement in Your Therapy Is at an All-Time High

We have already touched a bit on the hard work that goes into making sure that your therapy leads to a positive outcome, but is it possible to actually get to the point where you look forward to learning ways to put this into motion? Absolutely! And this is a sure sign that your therapy is headed in the right direction.

The more a patient progresses into therapy, it may become more clear which techniques work and which are more of a struggle for that particular individual. Each person is different, which is why therapists are trained experts who can quickly access a situation and take action.

Specifically with the use of questionnaires and surveys that the patient can utilize from their smartphones or tablets, there are even more ways to track a patient’s progress, even after they leave the office. This opens up even more options for successful patient engagement. Plus, as the field of mental health progresses and continues to look more and more to technology to offer even more ways for patients to stay engaged in their therapy, continued interest in treatment will hopefully soon be the norm, not the exception.  


Angela Ash is a professional article writer and editor, specializing in self improvement and health topics. She is also the Content Manager for Mentegram, a mental heaththcare company that has helped over 200 therapists provide better care to over 1,500 patients.

You’ve read 5 Signs Your Therapy Is Working, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

http://ift.tt/2w1SLgw

5 Signs Your Therapy Is Working

You’re reading 5 Signs Your Therapy Is Working, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Most people take that initial plunge into therapy with the highest of hopes. We want to make real changes in our lives. We want to be more successful. We want to be in control of our emotions. In short, we want to BE better than we are today, right at this very moment.

For therapists, it’s a requirement of their own success to ensure that they are providing treatment that will steer their patients toward a positive outcome. When they finally see that something “clicks” during treatment, it’s more than just the stereotypical light bulb coming on. It’s validation that their methods are improving their patient’s lives.

But once we start putting in all of that effort as a patient, how do we know that our hard work is paying off? Everyone likes a little positive reinforcement every now and then, right? So, let’s take a look at a few tell-tale signs that we are all moving in the right direction.

Your Relationships With Others Are Improving

As a patient progresses in their treatment, one of the first noticeable improvements is in interaction with others and how relationships are maintained. While we all experience problems at work with clashing personalities or that relative that just pushes your buttons every year during the holidays, what matters is our reaction to them.

As patients work through their therapy and discover underlying causes for not necessarily always reacting to others in the most positive of ways, then the motivation behind their actions will change. Relationships will grow stronger, which in turn, will support the overall mental health of the patient. Patients will find that they are building nurturing, positive relationships, rather than negative, destructive ones.

During this process, therapists will be able to set forth a treatment plan, focusing on relationship goals and how the patient will build new relationships and repair existing problems. This is also a time period when the therapist can see the progress that has been made with his or her techniques, especially if the patient is working with the therapist toward this outcome.

Your Overall Health Is Growing Stronger

When we are physically unhealthy, there can be many underlying reasons. You can probably think about that one person at the office who always seem to catch the latest bug that’s going around, or, no matter if it’s allergy season or not, always has the sniffles. Our mental health can most definitely be a contributing factor to how easily or often we experience illness.

However, not only can our mental health affect our susceptibility to a sickness, but it can also be an underlying cause. The New York Times recently published a post that discusses  how mental health disorders can affect a patient’s physical health in two primary ways. Mental health conditions may mask a physical ailment with depression or anxiety, not allowing the clinician to give the proper diagnosis, or they can actually be the direct cause of the ailment.

A therapist or other mental health professional can research these issues and determine whether a psychological problem is in fact a primary cause for a patient’s condition, or if it could be a side effect of a physical illness. As the patient’s physical health strengthens, the therapist and primary care physician can often work hand-in-hand to determine a course of treatment that benefits both conditions. Integrated care is so instrumental in the healthcare realm.

You Are Taking Responsibility for Your Actions

As you therapy continues, you should soon find that you no longer find it comforting to “play the blame game”. Often, when we are trying to make excuses for our own actions or our poor behavior, we tend to try to rationalize certain situations or scenarios. We can do this within our own minds, or we can express these “excuses” openly to anyone who will listen.

When we finally start admitting that there is no real rationale for a sudden burst of emotion or a day spent in bed with the covers pulled over our heads, a therapist can then begin to dig into the real reason that we are finding certain actions so difficult to take responsibility for. This can be a real process to work through, especially if this is breaking decades worth of self denial. Many therapists will implement behavioral assessments to further monitor your progress.

However, in the end, the benefits are endless. You’ll find that you spend way more time ensuring that you make the best decisions possible, rather than clocking in hours trying to come up with reasons to offset your mistakes. Plus, you’ll even find that, after some work, this will all become second nature

You Are Clearing Up the Clutter

Therapy can work some real magic, but anyone who has ever been in a therapeutic environment knows that you have to put in the work. There has never been a better example of “you get what you put in” than your personal therapy treatment. Yet, this new take on things will begin to spread into other facets of your everyday lives as well.

Let’s look at the mind. By removing all of the things that take up space, like worries over difficult relationships or anxiety over repeated poor decision making, you can free up plenty of room for all of the important things in you life. Think of it as a bit of spring cleaning for the mind!

Your therapist will also love you when you get to this point. You will think more clear-mindedly, enabling a clinician to really understand your thought processes and better set forth a line of treatment to address your particular mental health condition.

Engagement in Your Therapy Is at an All-Time High

We have already touched a bit on the hard work that goes into making sure that your therapy leads to a positive outcome, but is it possible to actually get to the point where you look forward to learning ways to put this into motion? Absolutely! And this is a sure sign that your therapy is headed in the right direction.

The more a patient progresses into therapy, it may become more clear which techniques work and which are more of a struggle for that particular individual. Each person is different, which is why therapists are trained experts who can quickly access a situation and take action.

Specifically with the use of questionnaires and surveys that the patient can utilize from their smartphones or tablets, there are even more ways to track a patient’s progress, even after they leave the office. This opens up even more options for successful patient engagement. Plus, as the field of mental health progresses and continues to look more and more to technology to offer even more ways for patients to stay engaged in their therapy, continued interest in treatment will hopefully soon be the norm, not the exception.  


Angela Ash is a professional article writer and editor, specializing in self improvement and health topics. She is also the Content Manager for Mentegram, a mental heaththcare company that has helped over 200 therapists provide better care to over 1,500 patients.

You’ve read 5 Signs Your Therapy Is Working, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

http://ift.tt/2w1SLgw

10 Things Introverts Should Start Doing Today to Live a Happier Life

You’re reading 10 Things Introverts Should Start Doing Today to Live a Happier Life, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

introverts happier

It’s not easy being an introvert, because our society seems designed for extroverts. Job interviews favor those who are personable, smooth-talking, and quick-thinking. Classrooms are noisy, busy places that reward the students who raise their hands frequently and dive into group work. The social scene lauds those who are confident, outgoing, and quick to make small talk.

How can an introvert live a happy, fulfilling life in an “extroverted” world? In my book, The Secret Lives of Introverts: Inside Our Hidden World, I explore how introverts can work with their introversion rather than fight against it. Here are 10 ways introverts can do just that.

1. Get over your guilt of leaving the social event early. Have you ever started saying your goodbyes at a social event only to have someone incredulously exclaim, “You’re leaving already? We’re just getting started!” These types of comments used to fill me with guilt. Why was I the only one getting drained and wanting to leave? Was there something wrong with me? Thankfully, I later learned that I’m an introvert, and introverts get worn out by socializing because they respond to rewards differently than extroverts (you can learn more about the science behind introversion in my book). Now, I have no problem calling it an early night and heading for the door.

2. Have more meaningful conversations. Introverts tend to loathe small talk because it feels pointless and inauthentic, but we feel energized by talking about meaningful topics and big ideas. And there’s good news for introverts: research suggests that the happiest people have twice as many meaningful conversations — and do less surface-level chitchat — than the unhappiest. You may even find that big talk doesn’t drain you the way small talk does.

3. Be okay with turning down social invitations that promise little meaningful interaction. We’ve all been there. An acquaintance invites you to such-and-such event. You feel obligated to attend because you don’t want to hurt that person’s feelings or seem rude. But you know that the birthday party for your friend’s niece’s toddler or the guys’ night out won’t be fulfilling. In fact, it will not only lack meaningful interaction but also leave you with an introvert hangover, which is when you feel physically unwell from overextending yourself socially. If you’re anything like me, you’ve spent a good chunk of your life saying yes to social invitations out of guilt — then you paid for it later with exhaustion and overstimulation. Of course, there are some things you probably shouldn’t skip, like your good friend’s wedding or your spouse’s birthday dinner with the family. Bottom line, to live a happier life, pass on any unnecessary get-togethers you feel will drain your introvert battery, not energize it.

4. Schedule your alone time to avoid hurt feelings. I had the pleasure of sitting down with introverted Indie rocker jeremy messersmith to interview him for my book. He told me about a smart practice he’s been doing for quite some time: He makes sure he gets enough alone time by scheduling it once a week on the family calendar. That way his extroverted wife won’t feel hurt when he says he wants to be alone, and they can both work together to protect his restorative solitude by not scheduling other obligations at that time.

5. Don’t force yourself to live the “extroverted” life. Research from the University of Maryland suggests that acting falsely extroverted can lead to burnout, stress, and cardiovascular disease. Turns out, embracing your introverted nature isn’t just a feel-good axiom — it’s actually good for your health.

6. Back away from one-sided relationships. Sadly, because introverts listen well and are often content to take the back seat, we can be targets for toxic or emotionally needy people. These relationships — in which one person is taking more than they give — drain our already limited social energy. If there are people in your life who continually exhaust you, consider spending less time with them. You’ll get the bonus of freeing up more time and energy for the people who do fill you up.

7. Stop beating yourself up for that awkward thing you said…3 years ago. Perhaps because introverts have more electrical activity in their brains than extroverts, they tend to ruminate. Our overthinking may take the form of playing embarrassing mistakes over and over in our minds. Sadly, rumination can give way to anxiety and depression — and it rarely helps you solve the problem you’re chewing on. To break free from the rumination cycle, do something to get the powerful engine of your mind chugging down a different track. Try calling to mind a positive memory, putting on music, going for a walk, or doing any different activity than the one you’re currently doing.

8. Give yourself permission to not do it all. I have an extroverted friend who always has her hand in something. If she’s not organizing a get-together with our friends, she’s volunteering at her son’s pre-school or taking on an extra project at work. I’ll admit that I’ve wished for her energy because she really does seem like she’s doing it all. But I have to remind myself that my talents lie in deep analysis, reflective thinking, and quality over quantity — not in running around doing all the things.

9. Occasionally push yourself out of your comfort zone. To my absolute horror, after writing a book about introversion, I learned that people wanted to talk to me about said book. They even wanted me to give interviews, go on podcasts, and give speeches! Let’s just say it was a very real lesson in pushing myself out of my stay-at-home-and-watch-Netflix comfort zone. Honestly, I hated almost every minute of it (I really did!), but I did those things because I knew it would be good for me. Taking the occasional jaunt out of your comfort zone can help you grow, too.

10. Protect your needs. Because introverts tend to be conscientious people who keep their thoughts to themselves, they may find their needs getting overlooked. Most people probably aren’t purposely trying to burden you or take advantage of you — it may be that they simply aren’t aware of what you need! Do you need a few hours to yourself to recharge from a busy week? Say it! Do you need someone to stop talking to you for a few minutes so you can concentrate? Tell them! Your needs matter just as much as everyone else’s.

My book, The Secret Lives of Introverts, has been called a “decoder ring for introverts” and “one of the best books [on] introvert empowerment.” It’s available for purchase on Amazon, or wherever books are sold.

You’ve read 10 Things Introverts Should Start Doing Today to Live a Happier Life, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

http://ift.tt/2wsx8Jj

10 Things Introverts Should Start Doing Today to Live a Happier Life

You’re reading 10 Things Introverts Should Start Doing Today to Live a Happier Life, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

introverts happier

It’s not easy being an introvert, because our society seems designed for extroverts. Job interviews favor those who are personable, smooth-talking, and quick-thinking. Classrooms are noisy, busy places that reward the students who raise their hands frequently and dive into group work. The social scene lauds those who are confident, outgoing, and quick to make small talk.

How can an introvert live a happy, fulfilling life in an “extroverted” world? In my book, The Secret Lives of Introverts: Inside Our Hidden World, I explore how introverts can work with their introversion rather than fight against it. Here are 10 ways introverts can do just that.

1. Get over your guilt of leaving the social event early. Have you ever started saying your goodbyes at a social event only to have someone incredulously exclaim, “You’re leaving already? We’re just getting started!” These types of comments used to fill me with guilt. Why was I the only one getting drained and wanting to leave? Was there something wrong with me? Thankfully, I later learned that I’m an introvert, and introverts get worn out by socializing because they respond to rewards differently than extroverts (you can learn more about the science behind introversion in my book). Now, I have no problem calling it an early night and heading for the door.

2. Have more meaningful conversations. Introverts tend to loathe small talk because it feels pointless and inauthentic, but we feel energized by talking about meaningful topics and big ideas. And there’s good news for introverts: research suggests that the happiest people have twice as many meaningful conversations — and do less surface-level chitchat — than the unhappiest. You may even find that big talk doesn’t drain you the way small talk does.

3. Be okay with turning down social invitations that promise little meaningful interaction. We’ve all been there. An acquaintance invites you to such-and-such event. You feel obligated to attend because you don’t want to hurt that person’s feelings or seem rude. But you know that the birthday party for your friend’s niece’s toddler or the guys’ night out won’t be fulfilling. In fact, it will not only lack meaningful interaction but also leave you with an introvert hangover, which is when you feel physically unwell from overextending yourself socially. If you’re anything like me, you’ve spent a good chunk of your life saying yes to social invitations out of guilt — then you paid for it later with exhaustion and overstimulation. Of course, there are some things you probably shouldn’t skip, like your good friend’s wedding or your spouse’s birthday dinner with the family. Bottom line, to live a happier life, pass on any unnecessary get-togethers you feel will drain your introvert battery, not energize it.

4. Schedule your alone time to avoid hurt feelings. I had the pleasure of sitting down with introverted Indie rocker jeremy messersmith to interview him for my book. He told me about a smart practice he’s been doing for quite some time: He makes sure he gets enough alone time by scheduling it once a week on the family calendar. That way his extroverted wife won’t feel hurt when he says he wants to be alone, and they can both work together to protect his restorative solitude by not scheduling other obligations at that time.

5. Don’t force yourself to live the “extroverted” life. Research from the University of Maryland suggests that acting falsely extroverted can lead to burnout, stress, and cardiovascular disease. Turns out, embracing your introverted nature isn’t just a feel-good axiom — it’s actually good for your health.

6. Back away from one-sided relationships. Sadly, because introverts listen well and are often content to take the back seat, we can be targets for toxic or emotionally needy people. These relationships — in which one person is taking more than they give — drain our already limited social energy. If there are people in your life who continually exhaust you, consider spending less time with them. You’ll get the bonus of freeing up more time and energy for the people who do fill you up.

7. Stop beating yourself up for that awkward thing you said…3 years ago. Perhaps because introverts have more electrical activity in their brains than extroverts, they tend to ruminate. Our overthinking may take the form of playing embarrassing mistakes over and over in our minds. Sadly, rumination can give way to anxiety and depression — and it rarely helps you solve the problem you’re chewing on. To break free from the rumination cycle, do something to get the powerful engine of your mind chugging down a different track. Try calling to mind a positive memory, putting on music, going for a walk, or doing any different activity than the one you’re currently doing.

8. Give yourself permission to not do it all. I have an extroverted friend who always has her hand in something. If she’s not organizing a get-together with our friends, she’s volunteering at her son’s pre-school or taking on an extra project at work. I’ll admit that I’ve wished for her energy because she really does seem like she’s doing it all. But I have to remind myself that my talents lie in deep analysis, reflective thinking, and quality over quantity — not in running around doing all the things.

9. Occasionally push yourself out of your comfort zone. To my absolute horror, after writing a book about introversion, I learned that people wanted to talk to me about said book. They even wanted me to give interviews, go on podcasts, and give speeches! Let’s just say it was a very real lesson in pushing myself out of my stay-at-home-and-watch-Netflix comfort zone. Honestly, I hated almost every minute of it (I really did!), but I did those things because I knew it would be good for me. Taking the occasional jaunt out of your comfort zone can help you grow, too.

10. Protect your needs. Because introverts tend to be conscientious people who keep their thoughts to themselves, they may find their needs getting overlooked. Most people probably aren’t purposely trying to burden you or take advantage of you — it may be that they simply aren’t aware of what you need! Do you need a few hours to yourself to recharge from a busy week? Say it! Do you need someone to stop talking to you for a few minutes so you can concentrate? Tell them! Your needs matter just as much as everyone else’s.

My book, The Secret Lives of Introverts, has been called a “decoder ring for introverts” and “one of the best books [on] introvert empowerment.” It’s available for purchase on Amazon, or wherever books are sold.

You’ve read 10 Things Introverts Should Start Doing Today to Live a Happier Life, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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Meditation Isn’t the Answer to Overthinking

You’re reading Meditation Isn’t the Answer to Overthinking, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

You’ve been meditating daily for the last week, month, or maybe even years. In moments it’s blissful, in others it can be frustrating. Thoughts come and go – but you’re now more aware of them.

But not too long afterwards a meditation, your mind can go back to its habitual patterns of thinking, churning negative thoughts in different periods of the day.

Over time, I’ve come to learn that meditation, while incredibly therapeutic, isn’t always the answer to overthinking.

Why we overthink and what we can do about it

Meditation brings awareness into your being and your thoughts. Done consistently, it allows you to begin to understand how your mind works. But there’s an issue that lies behind most of overthinking that isn’t tied to meditation.

It’s tied to the way you breathe.

When you only breathe from the neck up, you’re likelier to stay stuck in your head. When you breathe through your body, as you feel your belly rising with you; it’s far easier to be grounded.

If you were to change the way you breathe, you would change every single living moment of your life. Let that sink in for a moment…Simple reminders to deepen your breathing can help. But for many of us, our muscles around our neck are so tight that this alone won’t work.

You’ve been conditioned not to breathe properly

So many things in our society perpetuate a castrated way of breathing. From the ties we wear, to the belts we tighten every Monday-Friday, to the monitor displays that force us to bend our necks down, to texting on our phones – most of our activities are training us to not breathe properly!

You may also not be breathing properly because:

  • You sit down too much
  • You have poor air quality in the house
  • You do far too many pushing exercises and not enough pulling movements at the gym
  • You have an allergy you haven’t addressed
  • You eat high sugar foods which increase your anxiety and shorten your breathing

Express more of your thoughts

The deeper you breathe, the more of life you let in. Surprisingly, what could also be holding you back from breathing fully is not speaking enough.

I remember months going by where I read so many books and had all these ideas swirling in my head which I didn’t share with anyone. The result was that my mind felt castrated, and my breathing patterns deteriorated as a result. I remember weeks going by where all I was doing was working, not seeing any friends. I now realize how important it is to engage in heartfelt conversations with people – for my humanity, sanity, and breathing.

Any sense of social isolation can quickly make part of us feel like we’re rattling in our cage, which then inhibits our breathing. Express yourself as often as your heart permits, through your friendships, your career, and even a journal.

“The more you overthink the less you will understand.” – Habeeb Akande

It’s far harder to take your thoughts too seriously when you’re breathing deeply – almost as if everything on your mind takes a back seat. I’ve certainly not reached that place permanently, but the idea here isn’t to seek perfection in our breathing patterns, but to merely make small gradual improvements over time.

Begin a Yoga or Pilates Weekly Class

There’s a reason why Yoga, Pilates, and other stretching classes are becoming more and popular. They essentially melt away our rigidities, allowing us to breathe deeper and feel more alive.

All our muscular tensions are symbiotically connected to our minds, and the more we lengthen, stretch, and relax our muscles, the more we can breathe with depth and vibrancy. The day I started stretching on a daily basis, was the day my mind became a lot more relaxed throughout the day.

I didn’t even start with a class – even stretching my hamstrings and chest for fifteen mins every morning created an unbelievable difference in the way I breathed – and that’s what I highly recommend at the start.

If you still get stuck overthinking

Remind yourself to breathe deeply by focusing on your belly button rising and falling. And if you ever find yourself lost in a tangle of thoughts, refer to this quote:

“You will have bad thoughts. The key is never to fight them. They are your friends. Accept them just like a loving parent would to their misbehaving child and let go so you can breathe deeply. Treat your mind with love, and love will flow and emanate from you, one breath at a time.”

If you’re a creative and interested in learning how to live meaningfully in this digital, get my free book.

  • You’ll learn how to see your time differently
  • How to heal Smartphone Addiction
  • Avoiding Internet Burnout
  • And so much more…

 Samy Felice is a writer who brings meaning to words. His Free Book explores how to redefine success in a digital age. 

 

You’ve read Meditation Isn’t the Answer to Overthinking, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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How to Follow a Healthy Mental Diet

You’re reading How to Follow a Healthy Mental Diet, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Yon Cassius has a lean and hungry look.
-Shakespeare, “Julius Caesar”

I’ve never liked the word or concept of “diet”, because it implies something that’s temporary.

In fact, let’s put this eating plan into action, you make it permanent and rename it.

Come on over for a meal.

1-Healthy Conditions for Food Preparation and Enjoyable Dining

I started planning today’s “food” by consulting yesterday’s diary, my recipe book.

Yesterday went well, with the right mix of ingredients, good preparation, mindful eating, productivity, rest, and exercise.

Come on in.

A well-lit, spacious, uncluttered kitchen and eating area are a must.

Emptiness is the most surprising beneficial quality of mind that I’ve ever found.

So, let’s sit and be mindful. If your mind is empty, it is also well-lit, with new thoughts and feelings easily spotted.

An empty mind provides a clean and dry floor so that cook and diner keep their balance.

The cook needs to be attentive and observant.

Not judgmental, not critical, just observant.

Remember, this is a meal together, but it’s also a template for daily healthy living

2-Protein

These elements don’t have to be in any particular order.

Mindful productivity is the protein or fuel of mental activity, keeping off procrastination on the one hand and obsessive activity on the other.

The chef needs to be attentive for maximum preparation, and the diner needs to eat slowly
Chew the protein, observe the bites mindfully, enjoy healthy activity.

Of course, part of this mental protein is regular exercise plus necessary tasks.

3-Carbohydrates

Take the plate, please.

Creativity is essential for sustenance, and its equivalent in the eating world is whole grains.
This class of food that satisfies, but, due to the difficulty in breaking it down, it helps keep off weight and provides essential fuels.

Contemplation, structured or not, are the fruits and vegetables of the diet, yielding essential nutrients and the healthiest forms of sugar.

4-Fats

Don’t be put off by the idea of fats.

Fats are extremely important.

They provide insulation and temperature regulation.

Fats provide energy, plus, they aid in absorbing vitamins and producing hormones.

In terms of living, authentic emotion comprises the fat of a balanced mental diet.

Too much fat, in the form of inauthentic emotion, forces our psychic body to work too hard to be healthy and perform its required tasks.

Meanwhile, the stifling of authentic emotion produces defensive thinking, cutting us off from experiencing life directly.

5-Vitamins

Pick up the bottle, and take out three of them. I’ve checked the dosage, so don’t worry.

Here’s some useful information.

Vitamins come mostly from the food we eat, so the better we eat, the more we’ll take in the vitamins we need.

Vitamins are the experience, (Remember, I had you take three above!) the sum of our actions, our history, and our creativity.

6-Water

Hand me your glass…thanks.

Liquids and especially water are essential for health.

After all, 80% of our body is water. Thoughts are our water.

Sometimes it seems as if 80% of our experience is taken up with thought.

Water (not just ANY liquid) provides the best kind of healthy regulation of the body.

So, observed thought and productive thought that enhance intelligence and habit are psychological water.

Avoid the sugary sweet or intoxicating liquids of obsession, fear, or anxiety.

7-The Act of Eating

Okay, let’s sit for a moment and consider all that we’ve consumed.

Healthy eating requires mindful chewing and enjoyment of this balanced diet.

Both cook and diner must be patient and open to the experience.

Healthy companionship and relationships maximize a balanced life.

I hope you enjoyed sharing this meal; I enjoyed having you.

Sharing our gifts, like sharing food, is vital to helping both others as well as our own growth.

When we are “full” in a healthy way, we must note that observation and cease consumption.

8-Cleaning Up

While we enjoy the eating of life easily, we are reluctant to “clean up”.

As a result, some spiritual practices are hard.
But “cleaning up” requires forgiveness of others, repentance, self-sacrifice, and looking carefully at emotions such as anger and frustration.

So, when it comes to living, follow a balanced “eating” regime.
Call it whatever you wish, but eat follow a healthy psychic diet for the rest of your days.

Eat well, and be happy.


Lars Nielsen has decades of experience helping individuals and businesses discover and share their core message. Whatever your message or audience, grab his “Make YOUR Message Matter Cheat Sheet” (http://ift.tt/2v5s0a2) and put his time-tested techniques to work immediately.

You’ve read How to Follow a Healthy Mental Diet, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

http://ift.tt/2x4paTK

How to Follow a Healthy Mental Diet

You’re reading How to Follow a Healthy Mental Diet, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Yon Cassius has a lean and hungry look.
-Shakespeare, “Julius Caesar”

I’ve never liked the word or concept of “diet”, because it implies something that’s temporary.

In fact, let’s put this eating plan into action, you make it permanent and rename it.

Come on over for a meal.

1-Healthy Conditions for Food Preparation and Enjoyable Dining

I started planning today’s “food” by consulting yesterday’s diary, my recipe book.

Yesterday went well, with the right mix of ingredients, good preparation, mindful eating, productivity, rest, and exercise.

Come on in.

A well-lit, spacious, uncluttered kitchen and eating area are a must.

Emptiness is the most surprising beneficial quality of mind that I’ve ever found.

So, let’s sit and be mindful. If your mind is empty, it is also well-lit, with new thoughts and feelings easily spotted.

An empty mind provides a clean and dry floor so that cook and diner keep their balance.

The cook needs to be attentive and observant.

Not judgmental, not critical, just observant.

Remember, this is a meal together, but it’s also a template for daily healthy living

2-Protein

These elements don’t have to be in any particular order.

Mindful productivity is the protein or fuel of mental activity, keeping off procrastination on the one hand and obsessive activity on the other.

The chef needs to be attentive for maximum preparation, and the diner needs to eat slowly
Chew the protein, observe the bites mindfully, enjoy healthy activity.

Of course, part of this mental protein is regular exercise plus necessary tasks.

3-Carbohydrates

Take the plate, please.

Creativity is essential for sustenance, and its equivalent in the eating world is whole grains.
This class of food that satisfies, but, due to the difficulty in breaking it down, it helps keep off weight and provides essential fuels.

Contemplation, structured or not, are the fruits and vegetables of the diet, yielding essential nutrients and the healthiest forms of sugar.

4-Fats

Don’t be put off by the idea of fats.

Fats are extremely important.

They provide insulation and temperature regulation.

Fats provide energy, plus, they aid in absorbing vitamins and producing hormones.

In terms of living, authentic emotion comprises the fat of a balanced mental diet.

Too much fat, in the form of inauthentic emotion, forces our psychic body to work too hard to be healthy and perform its required tasks.

Meanwhile, the stifling of authentic emotion produces defensive thinking, cutting us off from experiencing life directly.

5-Vitamins

Pick up the bottle, and take out three of them. I’ve checked the dosage, so don’t worry.

Here’s some useful information.

Vitamins come mostly from the food we eat, so the better we eat, the more we’ll take in the vitamins we need.

Vitamins are the experience, (Remember, I had you take three above!) the sum of our actions, our history, and our creativity.

6-Water

Hand me your glass…thanks.

Liquids and especially water are essential for health.

After all, 80% of our body is water. Thoughts are our water.

Sometimes it seems as if 80% of our experience is taken up with thought.

Water (not just ANY liquid) provides the best kind of healthy regulation of the body.

So, observed thought and productive thought that enhance intelligence and habit are psychological water.

Avoid the sugary sweet or intoxicating liquids of obsession, fear, or anxiety.

7-The Act of Eating

Okay, let’s sit for a moment and consider all that we’ve consumed.

Healthy eating requires mindful chewing and enjoyment of this balanced diet.

Both cook and diner must be patient and open to the experience.

Healthy companionship and relationships maximize a balanced life.

I hope you enjoyed sharing this meal; I enjoyed having you.

Sharing our gifts, like sharing food, is vital to helping both others as well as our own growth.

When we are “full” in a healthy way, we must note that observation and cease consumption.

8-Cleaning Up

While we enjoy the eating of life easily, we are reluctant to “clean up”.

As a result, some spiritual practices are hard.
But “cleaning up” requires forgiveness of others, repentance, self-sacrifice, and looking carefully at emotions such as anger and frustration.

So, when it comes to living, follow a balanced “eating” regime.
Call it whatever you wish, but eat follow a healthy psychic diet for the rest of your days.

Eat well, and be happy.


Lars Nielsen has decades of experience helping individuals and businesses discover and share their core message. Whatever your message or audience, grab his “Make YOUR Message Matter Cheat Sheet” (http://ift.tt/2v5s0a2) and put his time-tested techniques to work immediately.

You’ve read How to Follow a Healthy Mental Diet, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

http://ift.tt/2x4paTK

August 20th

Once, poets were magicians. Poets were strong, stronger than warriors or kings — stronger than old hapless gods. And they will be strong once again.

Greg Bear

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