You’re reading How To Live In This Moment, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Look around you. Do you see that? This is where you are right now. Look in the mirror. See that face? That’s you, my friend. So, this is what you’ve got – right here, right now – yourself and this very moment.

Don’t panic. You aren’t stuck here. You can still get to where you want to go in life – without waiting for the perfect time and without worrying about all the ‘what ifs.’ You just need to find the strength to do so. (Notice I said “find.” You have the strength, you just may not know where you put it.)

In the meantime, maybe these 4 tips will help…

1. Living in the moment does not mean you aren’t growing. With society always telling us we need to go further in our career or be something or someone better than who we are, we often spend our days dreaming of the future. If only I could… or If only I had… or If only ___ would… See, “if only” doesn’t help you move forward. In fact, it halts you in the moment and stunts your growth. After all, you cannot focus on the present if you are stuck trying to dream up a fictitious future. Be present, be in your moment, and absorb all that you can.
2. Mantras or personal affirmations work. Remember years ago, when it was rumored that records or cartoons had subliminal messages that made kids do crazy things? Why not create your own message to yourself? Find something positive that you can repeat to yourself several times a day. Make it something that will bring you back when your mind starts to wonder and something that can remind you to live in the moment. Then, tape it to your mirror, your steering wheel, or write it in permanent marker on your hand – wherever you will see it and remember to repeat it. Then believe it!
3. Slow down. You heard me. Apply the brakes and back away from the driver’s seat. The simple idea of slowing down is hard for those who cannot live in the present. Rushing from point A to point B, in and out of appointments and meetings, social engagement after social engagement, then home to cook, clean, do laundry… all on about 5 hours or less of sleep because, face it – you need more hours in a day! No, no, and NO! This is not the way to live life. If you want to find yourself happy and settled in the future, then you need to slow yourself down now.

• Take on less work.
• Prioritize social engagements – and then pick only one to attend.
• Spend at least five minutes with yourself each day (in solitude).
• Remind yourself what is important – and what can wait.
• Sleep at least eight hours every night.
• Force yourself to physically move slower.

4. Give attention to the insignificant things. Sometimes we overlook the trivial things in life that make our day. It is not that we are ungrateful, we just may not realize their importance. For instance – a toilet, coffee, transportation, a hot meal, your favorite song, etc. These are all things that make our life a little more enjoyable and without them, well, we maybe wouldn’t be so… pleasant.

Acknowledge these things by writing them down, physically seeing all the perks you have this very moment in life. Sure, it may not be that house on the beach you always dreamed of when you were younger – but you have a roof over your head which means you are one step further than a lot of people! Keeping a journal of these things can help you focus your attention on the present, as well as become more appreciative of where you are in your life’s journey.

If you keep traveling ahead in your current manner, you won’t even know that you reached your future once you reach it! Your eyes will be so focused on the next thing. Start now and learn to enjoy life in the moment – this moment.

____________

Michelle Blan is a freelance writer and avid blogger determined to motivate even those lost in their darkest moments. There is always a way out…I can show you. Check out my blog at www.shellblan.com or follow me on Twitter @ShellBlan

You’ve read How To Live In This Moment, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading Why Guilt Is A Horrible Motivator, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

So you’ve eaten a piece of cake that you weren’t supposed to eat, or maybe you missed your child’s first ballet concert. If you’re like most people, and not a psychopath, chances are, you will feel guilty about what you did. Guilt is what we naturally feel when we believe we’ve done something wrong. But should we be looking to guilt to make us more productive? The answer is no. Guilt is not a good motivator. You’ll be better of counting on other things for that productivity boost.

Guilt Takes Up Too Much of Your Mental Space

If you’re trying to motivate yourself to finally start on that project you’ve been putting off, you might be thinking that you should remind yourself of how disappointed your boss would be if you don’t finish it in time. You might be trying to guilt yourself into working on it so you don’t let your boss down. A lot of times, this will get you working, but will you be surprised if I say you won’t be your most productive while you work?

Guilt makes you feel bad about yourself. When you go on a guilt trip, you’re essentially focusing on your flaws and imperfections. But as scientists will tell you, you’re most productive when you feel confident, competent, and happy, not when you feel like you’re being a horrible human being. Happiness is what increases productivity. If you have to spend part of your mental energy trying to deal with negative feelings like guilt, you won’t be free to focus all your mental faculties on the task at hand. So guilt, instead of helping you be more productive, ends up being just and extra burden on your brain.

It would be much better if you focus on doing the right thing instead of avoiding the wrong. Focus on being a good person instead of trying not to look like the bad guy. Rather than guilting yourself into finishing that project, motivate yourself by thinking of how happy you would make your boss feel when you complete it. Think of how grateful he would be that you did your part. Picture him celebrating the completion of the project and imagine yourself being partly responsible for his happiness. Thinking of the positive impact you can make will get you feeling happy and confident so you can be optimally productive.

It Makes You Do More of What You Feel Guilty Doing

What did you do when you felt guilty about breaking your diet and eating that cake? Did feeling guilty help you get back on track? Chances are, it did the opposite. You broke your diet, felt horrible about it, and decided, “What the heck I might as well have more cake.”

When you believe you’ve done something bad, you begin to think that you deserve to be punished for what you’ve done. If no one on the outside is going to punish you, you start looking for ways to punish yourself. Your self-punishment is your attempt to cleanse yourself of your guilty conscience. You end up punishing yourself by doing more of what made you feel horrible and guilty. You eat more of that cake, feel guiltier and it just becomes a cycle of guilt and self-punishment.

Next time you make a mistake, instead of beating yourself up for the wrong and pushing yourself into a vicious cycle, celebrate what you’ve done right so far. Focus on how you managed to stick to your diet two weeks, for instance, instead of letting that one time that you had a slice of cake overshadow everything. That’s more likely to get you back on track. You’ll end up wanting to feel like you’re succeeding again and getting back to your success strategy.

It’s an Extrinsic Motivator So It Doesn’t Last

You don’t want to be in a situation where the only reason you do what you do is because you want to avoid feeling guilty. So maybe the only reason you’re spending sleepless nights studying through med-school is because you don’t want to disappoint your parents. Maybe only thing that’s making you work hard to finish projects and meet deadlines is your desire to not feel bad about disappointing your boss. This means that you’re looking to the outside to find the motivation to do what you do, and there’s nothing intrinsic pushing you forward.

Your desire to avoid guilt is an extrinsic motivator. What would happen if this extrinsic motivator is removed? What would happen if, for instance, you find yourself working as an entrepreneur with no boss to disappoint? You lose your impetus. The new freedom confuses you and might even leave you paralyzed on how to act. That’s why you might see a person who is very hard-working in a structured office setting struggle to get anything done when they become self-employed entrepreneurs.

What you want to do instead is to find a way to build and nurture that intrinsic motivation. Regardless of the job you have, get yourself to a place where you wake up every morning ready to take on the day, not for your family or your boss, but simply because you enjoy what you do. Find a way to do your job simply because it makes you happy. That way you’ll keep being productive and doing your best, even when you have no boss to impress.

The next time you want to guilt yourself into doing something remember that you’ll be sabotaging yourself. It’s much better if you focus on doing the right thing instead of avoiding the bad, celebrating your successes, and enjoying yourself through every task.

Nelu Mbingu is a self-improvement blogger. She enjoys sharing her ideas about personal growth and social success on her blog, Lessons From Everyday Life. She loves telling her stories, hearing other people’s stories, and becoming wiser day by day. Visit her blog or follow her on Instagram: neluthecurious_

You’ve read Why Guilt Is A Horrible Motivator, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading 6 Productivity Mistakes Successful People Never Make, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

“Winners never quit and quitters never win.” – Vince Lombardi

It’s true: if you want to rise to the top in business, you should buckle up because the ride can get pretty rocky. These days, competition is fiercer than ever across industries, and challenges and pitfalls lurk at every corner, which makes a life of 21st-century entrepreneurs tougher than their parents had it. Still, achieving peak productivity and superior business results can be a bit easier if you know how to avoid common mistakes that can slay your success before you get to savor its sweet taste. Don’t know which performance killers to watch out for? Here’s a list of six things successful people never: use it as a signpost as you elbow your way to top industry tiers.

1. Successful people never waste time on social media

Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter can be fun, but successful people whose eyes are set on peak productivity never get sucked into the vortex of social media. If you’re not using social networks for business purposes, you should limit the time you spend online or use it as a reward to savor after the work day is done. After all, control over your time is at the end of your own fingertips, and if you let it go to waste, you’ll have only yourself to blame.

2. Successful people never treat their wellbeing frivolously

Successful people know that ill health and exhaustion can punch deep holes in productivity, and they listen to their bodies and strive to stay fit and energized at all costs. If you want to max out your productivity, you should go over your carte du jour and see whether it can be adjusted with peak health in mind. To stay on the successful side of the bed, you can devise a bedtime routine and buy new mattresses online: it’ll make sure your batteries get a full recharge every night.

3. Successful people don’t stress over things they can’t control

Worrying is a waste of time and mental power, and successful people know they can’t afford to lose either. Instead of pondering on possible outcomes and different scenarios of development of events, try to focus on action-based activities and things that are in your control. By doing so, you’ll get more done and you’ll stay on the positive side of the mindset while allowing things beyond your control to work themselves out in their own time.

4. Successful people never start a day without a game plan

Long-term productivity is built from blocks of habit, and successful people know it well. For this reason, successful people never start the day without a game plan, and they stick to the priority list and the things they want to achieve religiously. To hack peak productivity, it’s a smart idea to make a list of your daily tasks and to use it as a roadmap in the quest for superior results in both professional and private life.

5. Successful people never compare themselves to others

Have you ever caught yourself comparing your productivity to others’ performance? If you have, you probably know that it’s a one-way ticket to misery and anger. Successful people never waste energy trying to be better, smarter, or more productive than others: they focus on their To Dos and strive to get as much done as is possible in the given circumstances. Comparing your output and your coworkers’ performance will get nothing done: it’ll just do your self-esteem in.

6. Successful people never ponder on past mistakes

Mistakes are a normal part of life, but stressing over them is futile. That’s why successful people never waste time dwelling on errors and ‘What If’s. Instead, they learn from mistakes and move past them, and they know that negative experiences are valuable lessons with growth potential. If you want to rise to the top, you need to be prepared to make mistakes – but you also need to be able to prevent less than stellar outcomes from getting you down.

The road to professional achievement might not be covered in roses but there’s no need for you to get pricked by just about every thorn you stumble upon as you elbow your way to success. If you want to speed up the pursuit of top-notch productivity and business results, at least try not to make the most common mistakes that will shatter your performance in a blink. Good luck!

You’ve read 6 Productivity Mistakes Successful People Never Make, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading Stress Management: Top Ten Habits To Reduce Stress In Your Daily Life, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Are we dealing with stress properly?

With the demands of work, family, and society, stress can sometimes get the best of us. Not being able to manage stress properly can’t only pose a risk to our health, but to our relationships as well.

Whilst we may not have control to outside circumstances that give us stress, we have full control on how to deal with it. Below are some tips on how to manage and reduce stress in our everyday life.

1. Focus on doing one thing at a time

All of us may know Jack, the master of all trades. The pressure of our society forces us to be Jack and do a lot of things at the same time. With all the deadlines that need to be met, we should all know how to master the art of multi-tasking.

Though this can get us to finish a lot of things, juggling works at the same time leads to stress and exhaustion. Learn on focus on one thing at a time. Not only it will reduce your stress level, it will also lead to better production as your mind is solely focused on doing one thing.

2. Go for a morning walk

Walking is one of the easiest forms of cardiovascular exercise. Once our heart is pumped up, it releases happy hormones and makes us feel better.

To maximize the benefits of walking, start your day with a walk outside. Make this as your everyday morning routine. Aside from the benefits of walking, the fresh air and nice surroundings will clear your mind and give you a fresh and better perspective.

3. Exercise regularly

There is no doubt that one can’t live a healthy life without exercising regularly. Aside from the fact that exercise helps us maintain or lose some weight and lowers our risk of getting diseases, it can also lower down our stress level.

How can exercise do this?

Exercise produces endorphins. They are the chemicals in our brain that improves the ability to sleep and as a natural pain killer. This, in turn, reduces stress.

A minimum of 30 minutes daily exercise for fitness has a long list of benefits.

4.  Listen to music

It is said that music is food for the soul.  There’s a whole truth to this popular saying as music nourishes our soul and put us into calmness and ease.

Whenever you are in a stressful situation, listen to your favorite song and you will be surprised how it can turn things around. A hectic and crazy day at the office can lighten up if you have your favorite playlist playing in the background.  Fill your smartphone’s playlist with happy songs to turn the bad day around.

5. Create schedule

Stress and tension arise if things get out of hand. When you don’t know how to manage your schedule properly, things to do get piled up and can get out of hand. If you can’t meet your to-do-list, this can result in pressure and disappointments.

Create a stress-free day by organizing your schedule. List all the things that you need to accomplish within a day and allot a specific time to do them. Do these before you start your day so that you know how your day would look like and can get more things accomplished.

6. Have fun each day

Laughter is the best medicine. It’s free yet very effective. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Instead of sulking and being stressed every time you commit a mistake, laugh at yourself. Having a positive and fun perspective can make everything feel better.

Look for things that you enjoy doing. We need to take a break from work and bathe ourselves with the things that we love. Surround yourself with people that know how to have fun. Life is too short to be spent angry or stressed.

7. Throwing yourself into a creative activity

Fight stress by engaging in activities that satisfy your creativity. Enroll in painting, music or art class. Find a field that you’re most interested in and explore your creativity. There’s no limit to what you can do if you open your eyes to the possibility of your skills.  If you can’t be the next Mozart or Michelangelo, at least you had fun while exploring your creative side.

8. Spend some time with family and friends

Family and friends are our support groups. They will be there with you through thick and thin. Spending some time with them brings comfort and happiness. So whenever you are in a stressful situation, give your loved ones a call and you can count that they will be there for you. You don’t need to go to a fancy restaurant or do cool things together to ease your stress. Even just a simple catch up will certainly put you in a good mood.

9. Don’t forget to laugh

Happy people are less stress compared to unhappy ones. Having a good laugh is probably the cheapest yet most effective way in reducing stress. Watch a funny movie or video, read a funny joke or you can even laugh at yourself. Finding humor in every situation, even the stressful ones, will certainly lighten up your mood.

10. Spend time helping out a friend

When we help someone in need, especially a friend or a loved one, we feel a wonderful warmth feeling afterward. It’s this feeling of accomplishment that you helped someone gives you a sense of euphoria. So don’t hesitate to lend anyone your hand as you are not only helping others, but you are also helping yourself.

You don’t have to live with stress every day. Learn to overcome it by simply doing these daily habits. You’ll be surprised at how these habits can make you look younger and happier.

You’ve read Stress Management: Top Ten Habits To Reduce Stress In Your Daily Life, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading 25 Ways to Win Over Your Depression Thoughts for Good, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Sometimes the simplest things become the hardest things when dealing with depression.

Dressing up and going out for a simple coffee with friends becomes an obligation and being alone and in bed is the most comforting place to be.

Depression sucks and is a very mean devil that needs to be dealt with by you and only you!

Because if you don’t, it will drag you down into this seemingly endless black tunnel where hope is nowhere to be found and seeing the light at the end of the tunnel is non-existing, sounds familiar?

Keep reading.

Some people confuse depression with being unhappy. Yep! That was me.

However, depression is a clinical condition while unhappiness is simply a result of an unhappy relationship or a unfulfilling job. With depression, the activities you once found enjoyable lose their luster and the pursuit of happiness will never end.

One thing that I have always told my friends who went through depression is to be aware and not confuse it with being unhappy. It can become a very dangerous game for some if the confusion continues. If you feel that you shy away from what you love or what usually gives you energy then it’s time to examine deeper as to why you are feeling that way.

Remember this – everything in life is fixable if you have the will to turn things around, and depression is one of them.

To be honest it took me about a couple of years to win over the battle by forcing myself to dive into activities that are energetic and surrounding myself with the great supportive people who are understanding and sensitive to my needs.

If you are willing to follow the steps that I took to gradually banish depressing thoughts one day at a time. It will be a challenge but loving yourself means to find ways to pursuit an endless happiness in your life and those around you.

Below is a cheat sheet that shows 25 activities that will help you crush your depression thoughts once and for all.

However, whatever you do, do not give up half-way because learning how to keep going will help you overcome any obstacles that life will throw at you.

You’ve read 25 Ways to Win Over Your Depression Thoughts for Good, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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