9 Morning Rituals Which Will Make You More Productive

You’re reading 9 Morning Rituals Which Will Make You More Productive, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

It doesn’t take much to understand the importance of a good start to the day. If you’ve ever started the day on the wrong foot you already know it could have a massive impact on your productivity throughout the day. Most people drag themselves out of bed and spend their mornings in a groggy stupor. This brain fog prevents them from being productive and getting any meaningful work done in the first few hours of the day. When lunch arrives, they’ve managed to do less than expected and by late evening, they’re too tired to complete what little they started. This vicious cycle can chew into your productivity if you let it become a long-term habit.

Instead, the most successful people on the planet wake up surprisingly early and have a set routine that pumps them up for the rest of the day. A routine that’s specifically designed to wake you up and get you started on the right note is immensely valuable. It can help you breeze through your tasks and deliver better results than ever before. So, here are the nine essential things you must do to make your mornings productive:

  1. Smile

This might seems like an odd way to start the list, but it’s the easiest to do the minute you get up. Smiling, even if you don’t feel like it, has a proven effect on your good hormone levels. Different things can make different people smile, so it’s important to find what works for you. Perhaps you could remind yourself of a certain good thing that happened the day before or make it a habit to smile at yourself in the mirror when you go looking for your toothbrush. Remember, you don’t have to be genuinely happy or amused every day. You simply have to fake a quick smile first thing in the morning to make yourself feel better.

  1. Meditate

There’s a considerable stack of evidence to support the positive effects of meditating. Not only can it help you calm down and focus better, but it can also help you visualize the day ahead and prepare for a productive few hours. Many top-level athletes visualize themselves completing their competition before they go out onto the field. The same applies to work. You can spend a few minutes focusing on your breath before you start pumping yourself up for the day. Seeing yourself working through multiple projects energetically is the best way to boost your energy and get more done.

  1. Intense exercise

Another simple way to boost your energy levels is to start the day with a short and intense exercise routine. Any quick exercise routine will help you boost blood circulation. The great thing with exercising in the morning is the flexibility you have to set your own routine. You can take a few minutes to stretch or spend half an hour jogging around the neighborhood. Any form of exercise is likely to have the same effect, but since you’ve started early in the morning you can get through a proper routine without having to worry about your other commitments. You have a clear window of free time to get moving before your work starts. Not only will an intense workout boost your energy, but it will also help you feel more focused and confident throughout the day. This can have a real impact on your productivity at work.

  1. Drink water

This trick doesn’t get mentioned a lot but it should. The body tends to get dehydrated while you sleep. A lack of water could be the reason you feel lethargic and groggy in the morning. A glass of water first thing in the morning will help your body replenish the lost moisture. Make sure, however, that you aren’t substituting water with anything else in the first hour after you wake up. Avoid that cup of coffee you crave till later in the morning. Over time your body will start getting used to a glass of water and you’ll crave it whenever you wake up.

  1. Cold shower

An early morning cold shower might sound horrible, but it’s a great way to shake yourself awake and make you focus on the day ahead. Warm showers usually help reduce your blood pressure and help you relax. That’s perfect if you’re about to go to bed, but not really ideal when you have to get started with work in the morning. A cold shower, on the other hand, will boost your immunity, pump your blood pressure higher, reduce stress and perhaps even make you burn fat faster. It’s a great way to start the day if you can get accustomed to it.

  1. Rich Breakfast

Never underestimate the power of a hearty breakfast. Packing your body with all the essential nutrients is absolutely crucial when you start your day. Try to start off with a power-packed protein filled breakfast.

  1. Feed the brain (news)

Almost every successful person you’ll meet will have one thing in common – a desire to learn. Most successful business leaders start their day by feeding not just their stomach but also their mind. It could be a simple morning routine of reading the newspaper or a few pages of that novel you’ve been enjoying. Even a simple crossword puzzle or a game of chess could help you start your day with a stimulated mind. Your ability to grasp new concepts and better techniques is also at its peak early in the morning, so this might be the best time to learn that new language or pick up a new skill.

  1. Plan your day

Starting your day by planning ahead could be a shortcut to productivity. It’s better to plan your day at the start rather than decide what you’re going to do the night before. Early in the morning, you’re in a better position to judge your ability and capacity for work. You can create a reasonable plan for the tasks ahead. This will help you judge the scope of every project you have pending.

  1. Eat a frog

Once you’re done planning you can hit the ground running. Eating the frog is from Mark Twain’s advice about starting the day with the most painful or difficult task. Once you’ve cleared an important hurdle in the morning, you can spend the rest of the day going through the easier task with more confidence.

Human beings are hopelessly habitual. The brain craves structure and repetition so it can exert less energy and get more done efficiently. The problem with most people is that they let bad habits creep into their mornings. There’s simply no way to be productive if you start the day wrong. Take the time to create a morning routine based on these nine essentials. A proper morning routine will make you a lot more productive and will have a major impact on your eventual success.

You’ve read 9 Morning Rituals Which Will Make You More Productive, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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April 1st

I do not think I have any uncharitable prejudice against the rattlesnake, still, I should not like to be one.

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Want More Positivity in the People Around You? The First Step Starts With You

You’re reading Want More Positivity in the People Around You? The First Step Starts With You, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Positivity is contagious. It’s been proven that if we are surrounded by positive people, we are more likely to be positive. It’s hard to be happy when everyone around you is negative.  It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is positive.

So here’s the question:  Do we change who is around us…or change who is around us?

If you can change who, then do it. If someone is spewing rage in your social media feed and you don’t want to see it, mute it. Unfortunately, in the real world, it’s not that simple to mute people.

So what do you do? One way to be surrounded by more positive people is to simply make the people who surround you more positive… But how? Here is one simple strategy you can do today and make a difference.

Surprise someone with a compliment. Give someone a genuine, specific compliment and let them know what their actions meant to you or how it made you feel. It’s a simple way to invest positivity in your network and one of the most powerful things you can do to boost your own positivity.

I would like to take a moment to give you a compliment. Congratulations on making an investment in yourself by reading this positivity blog. By taking the time to invest in yourself, you are increasing your capabilities and growing. I’m thrilled you are here with me because it means that the time and energy I’ve spent writing this blog is worth it, and that means a lot to me. Thank you.

Did that feel good? I hope so. When you give someone else a compliment, it increases their positivity, and it can be one of the most powerful actions you can take for boosting your own positivity as well. Also, if you provide the compliment publicly, everyone who witnesses it will get a boost in their positivity.

I learned this lesson about compliments in a leadership course early on in my career and decided to try it outside of work in my role as a tee-ball coach and a youth soccer coach. During our games, I would notice and jot down something each player did well on the field. After the game ended, I would talk to each kid independently and bring up the play and what they did that I thought was so good. Those kids were naturally transparent with their reactions, and you could see each of them perk up and puff up a little.

As adults we sometimes don’t let on that we need that kind of encouragement and validation. We try to keep or reaction inside, but there is not one among us who doesn’t appreciate a genuine compliment. A heartfelt acknowledgement of our efforts or accomplishments feels great even if we are too cool to let it show on the outside.

The keys to providing a meaningful compliment include:

  • referencing a specific situation or event
  • recognizing a specific action or behavior
  • coming from genuine appreciation
  • expressing what it meant to you or how it made you feel
  • offering it without any expectations of reciprocation

So if you want to inject a little positivity into your network and give yourself an #AttitudeFitness boost, take this simple step today. Surprise someone with a compliment right now and then share it publicly on social media so that others get an attitude boost as well. #ThankYou, You boosted my #AttitudeFitness.

If you want to learn more ways to increase the positivity in yourself and the people around you, take the positivity quiz and learn three positivity principles that can make a difference in your life.

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10 Ways to De-stress Your Mind and Body

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Many people know that stress is the leading killer of adults in the United States… but even a statement as strong as that one may not properly convey what a serious issue this really is. According to a study conducted by the American Institute of Stress, an incredible 44% of Americans say that they feel more stressed today than they did just five years ago. One out of every five people say that they regularly experience “extreme stress” – the symptoms of which include shaking, heart palpitations, depression and more. Work-related stress alone causes an unforgivable 10% of all strokes each year.

But the key to solving this epidemic involves more than just acknowledging that stress is a bad thing. You must first understand that stress is a two-headed enemy – one that affects your MIND as well as your BODY. Stress tends to come at you from all angles, so you’ll need to be equally vigilant in your approach to combating it if you want to rid it from your life as much as possible.

Your Battle With Stress Begins Now

The first thing you must do as you begin to work on stress-related issues is properly identify where they’re coming from. Everyone is a little bit different – what one person considers to be a stressful situation at work may just be “Tuesday” to someone else. Because of this, you’ll want to start by first identifying the things throughout your day that trigger stress.

Only by understanding how stress uniquely manifests itself in your life can you really come to terms with the extent of the problem you’re dealing with. Once you’ve identified the rules of the game you’re actually playing, you can begin to work towards that critical balance once and for all.

Along the same lines, it is of paramount importance that you understand stress is not something you can ever truly remove from your life – that’s not what you’re trying to do. If work predominantly causes the stress in your life, the easy answer is to say “quit your job” – but you can’t really do that, can you? Instead, you need to understand what causes stress so that you can adjust your own reaction to it. You’ll never be able to have a completely stress-free work experience (this is why it’s called “work” and not “happy fun time”). Only by acquiring this context will you be able to get started doing what is right for you.

As you work to de-stress your mind and body, one helpful thing that can often help accomplish both at the same time is a little good, old-fashioned exercise. Stress often manifests itself physically, be it in the form of heart palpitations or a sudden pain in your neck that just won’t go away. When this happens, making a POSITIVE physical reaction can be a great way to mitigate the issue. Drop down on the floor in your office and do a couple of push-ups. Go for a jog on your lunch break instead of sitting in your car and listening to the radio.

Do something – anything – physical to combat stressful reactions. Not only can it help clear your head and remove the weight of the world from your shoulders, but if you get into this habit enough you can also help prevent similar reactions from arising in the future. You’ll also go a long way towards improving your overall health if you prioritize exercise, which is very much a good thing on its own.

These are just a few of the essential tips you’ll learn about in the following Infographic, appropriately titled “10 Ways to De-Stress Your Mind and Body.” Created with Visme, it’s an invaluable resource that you can use to not only remove stress from your day, but to cut it out of your life wherever you can. You need to understand that there is no magic bullet when it comes to defeating stress. It’s not like you can flip a light switch and suddenly you’ll be relaxed and calm 100% of the time. As with most things, it’s often a series of small-yet-critical steps that, when taken together, add up to a pretty powerful whole.

 

Payman Taei is the founder of Visme, an easy-to-use online tool to create engaging presentations, infographics, and other forms of visual content. He is also the founder of HindSite Interactive, an award winning Digital agency specializing in website design, user experience and web app development.

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10 Conflict Resolution Skills For Having A “Good” Fight

Conflict Resolution Skills


There’s no way around it: living a full life means embracing conflicts with other people.

In the course of a typical week most of us will encounter coworkers, friends, and family members who have their own beliefs, preferences, tastes, intentions, and plans.

What we want or believe won’t always align with what others want or believe.

Unfortunately, while most of us would like to think we’re flexible and creative as problem solvers, research suggests that we’re first and foremost conflict averse, biting our tongue or actively taking steps to avoid potential conflict with others.

Whether it’s a work colleague’s bad idea, a roommate’s annoying habit, or an in-law rattling on about politics, many of us would rather shut up (rolling our eyes or complaining to friends) than engage.

When we do engage, we may give in quickly or compromise, failing to meet our own needs or devise really useful solutions.

Or if we dig in our heels, we fall into the trap of trying only to persuade the other side that our belief or preference is the right one – missing the chance to learn more and to problem solve.

In short, what most of us do well is to negotiate solutions to conflict.

Why is that?

Learn 10 conflict resolution skills for having a good fight.

First, conflict is more emotionally perilous than we may think.

My research has shown that people rate the prospect of conflict with a friend or roommate to be about as pleasant as running out of gas in the middle of traffic or sleeping on an airport floor.

Second, “negotiating” isn’t a strategy that is modeled well for most us. Too many of us don’t really understand why negotiation is such a powerful process option, and what it means to negotiate effectively, particularly when relationships matter.

Finally, we don’t know how to build the right kind of confidence in approaching and resolving conflict effectively.

Conflict: why we hate it so much.

As I argue in Resolve: Negotiating Life’s Conflicts with Greater Confidence, most conflicts are “crucibles” in which our own mix of motives and fears are interacting, under pressure.

We want to achieve a better outcome — stopping the neighbor’s loud music, amending our spouse’s proposed vacation plans, or revising a new work policy. But when relationships matter, we’re driven by two other motives.

The first is the desire to preserve what psychologists and behavioral economists call social capital — the relationship(s) or reputations that are at stake.

Humans are highly social animals, and we tend to achieve better outcomes over time when we have many allies and few enemies.

Conflicts that aren’t managed well can put social capital at risk. Will my spouse be in a foul mood if we argue? Will the relationship with my neighbor or in-law suffer if we disagree? What will they tell others about me?

The second is the desire to avoid negative feelings in ourselves and others. Some of us are more prone to negative emotions than others; some of us self-monitor more than others; some of us have been raised (by family and culture) to believe that certain emotions are harmful or rude.

These personality tendencies (called temperament, emotional awareness, and meta-emotional style) mean that for some of us, conflicts can become an emotional minefield in which we twist and turn to try to avoid feeling bad or making the other person feel bad.

How to have a “good” fight.

To live fully, we need to get better at having a good fight. What does that mean? It means understanding how to approach and resolve conflicts in ways that generate useful solutions while protecting relationships.

A good fight doesn’t mean being “nicer” about fighting. Rather, it means, having a good process for working through differences. And this is where negotiation becomes so important.

Negotiating well means deploying a process of creating better solutions — ones that meet each person’s most important needs and preferences — in a way that protects social capital and manages emotions.

We need to develop mastery in negotiating, and this only happens through practice.

Sadly, most of us don’t see negotiation modeled often or well in our families or beyond. Much of what we see in Hollywood movies are examples of extreme negotiation (hostage situations) and stereotypically amusing negotiation (haggling).

More often what we see modeled is active avoidance, giving in, compromise (which may leave no one happy, when stakes are high), and mutual attempts at persuasion.

Negotiation is not about persuasion. There is an element of persuasion in most negotiations, but to protect relationships and generate solutions, two (or more) heads are almost always better than my idea (or yours).

What we need is a better way to disagree — a way to have a “good” fight. This isn’t something that happens overnight; it is something that we build over time, sometimes in partnership with our spouses, friends, or coworkers.

Forty years of negotiation research suggest that there are reliable traps we fall into, and reliable ways that we screw up when we think about conflict. (This is true beyond the negotiating table, and bestsellers like Predictably Irrational and Thinking Fast and Slow are excellent summaries.)

To build our confidence in approaching conflict, managing our own foibles, and dealing with stressors of the conflict crucible, we need to develop confidence, without becoming arrogant or pushy.

Books like Sheryl Sandberg’s Lean In did a terrific job of describing the costs of not negotiating often or well, but not such a great job at explaining how to “lean in” without having others become irritated.

A slew of research suggests that when less powerful people act in more assertive ways, they are punished by others, rather than rewarded.

Develop greater confidence in negotiating life’s conflicts.

Developing confidence in approaching and managing conflicts requires first understanding what it means to be genuinely confident.

Confidence is not bravado, braggadocio, fake-it-til-you-make-it, or the use of intimidating or aggressive tactics.

True confidence in social settings has three components: mastery (a behavioral component), awareness (a cognitive or mental component) and poise (an emotional component).

Read Related: 9 Powerful Body Language Tips to Boost Your Confidence

There are ways to cultivate all three of these facets of confidence. (To distill a great deal of research into a few sentences: have a process plan; practice out loud; use checklists; diversify your coping style; engineering situations.)

But there are specific tactics that make sense when you are in a situation where the relationship matters most — whether is it a romantic connection, a family member, a roommate, a friend, or a mentor.

For these situations, here are ten conflict resolution skills to help you to build confidence and competence approaching and navigating a “good” fight.

1. Pick the right time.

Too often, we decide to start up conflict in the evening, when we’re tired. With more of us working longer hours, this is recipe for disaster.

Instead, schedule a time (Saturday lunch, once a month) to handle issues where you are disagreeing, or a behavior that someone is finding irritating.

2. Start with a constructive frame.

“I’d like to discuss the way to talk to the kids” actually sounds to the receiver like a criticism. The problem, as defined, is in the other person.

Instead try, “I’d like to see if we can agree on some rules for how we talk to the kids.” This is a more constructive frame for the conversation, naming a positive goal rather than implying a deficiency in the other person.

3. Create ground rules together.

When my wife and I were first married, we realized that arguing in the evening rarely led to good outcomes. We implemented a “six o’clock rule” that prevented us from raising major issues after 6:00 pm.

Research on circadian rhythms suggests why this is helpful: most of us are not as patient and alert as we are earlier in the day.

Another rule? Avoid using the words always and never. But those are just ours. You and your partner or friends should come up with your own, over time.

4. Listen and validate first.

Remember that letting someone feel heard and understood is a powerful way to help them to be more generous and flexible.

You can acknowledge what someone is saying or feeling without agreeing that they are “right” to their view or feeling.

Simply summarizing what you are hearing, without judgment, is a powerfully constructive move.

5. Generate more than one option.

When future plans or current problematic behaviors are the topic, disputants tend to rush quickly to a proposed solution and then argue about whether it is good or bad.

Instead, declare a short period of brainstorming, where many solutions get put forward, without criticism.

Once multiple solutions are present, you may find that combining several of them is quickly agreeable to both people.

6. Seek social resources.

Too often we stew for days or weeks about things that are bothering us, eventually letting loose with a barrage of criticisms that make constructive engagement hard for the other person.

Instead, find a confidant you can talk to about what is bothering you before resentments build up. Ask them to help you.

They can help you articulate what is really bothering you, and what you really want; help you think of a constructive opening frame; help you think of questions to ask; help you talk about your fears.

As new data on relationships has shown, social support is a remarkable aid in helping our brains to work better.

7. Recast criticism as complaint.

As research by John Gottman has shown, there is an important distinction between a complaint and criticism.

Complaint identifies a behavior as the problem; criticism implies a quality or trait inside the other person as the problem.

Read Related: How to Deal With Mean and Nasty People

If your partner or roommate opens with, “Your absent-mindedness is getting to be a problem,” avoid the urge to debate about whether you are absent-minded.

Instead, focus on specifics. What specifically are we talking about?

Conversations that begin with criticism tend to spiral downward into cycles of defensiveness and counter-criticism, leaving everyone unhappy.

Conversations that begin with a specific complaint tend to lead to more concrete solutions.

8. Use the phrase, “Anything else?”

A powerful move at the outset of a conflict is to invite the other person to really “empty their pockets” in terms of their issues with you.

“I want to talk about summer plans,” says Allison. But what if instead of starting in, Pat simply asks, “Anything else?”

Read Related: What is Empathy and How Does It Differ From Sympathy

The real issue might be that Allison feels that Pat doesn’t want to spend time together that summer. Making space for the real issue to emerge at the front end can save a lot of time.

9. Learn a few repair moves.

Repair moves are moves that help ease tensions in the thick of an emotionally difficult disagreement.

Three powerful ones are humor (which must be funny to the other person); reminiscing about a fun time together; and apologizing for your part in creating a problem.

10. Reframe conflict as normal.

Last, but definitely not least: think of conflict as a signal that your relationship is normal, not troubled.

All meaningful relationships have conflicts. The presence of conflict or disagreement is not a sign that things are somehow bad or wrong in the relationship.

Rather, it’s the way we handle conflict that matters — and avoiding conflict is extremely costly in the long run, because we get worse outcomes and fail to seize opportunities to deepen our mutual understanding and trust.

These ten moves will help create conditions in close relationships that make it more likely you will generate beneficial solutions in ways that protect social capital and avoid bad feeling.

Finally, remember this: habits around conflict are like well-worn grooves that we fall into over and over again.

Creating new ones takes time and practice. But starting with a better process is the fastest route to having better fights, and to building your confidence in approaching and navigating conflict when the stakes are high.

Author Bio:

Founder and president of Movius Consulting, Dr. Hal Movius is also consultant to the Affective Neuroscience Laboratory at the University of Virginia, research collaborator at Ethical Systems at NYU Stern, senior consultant to the Consensus Building Institute, and visiting executive lecturer at the Darden Graduate School of Business. He is the author of Resolve: Negotiating Life’s Conflicts with Greater Confidence (2017) which prescribes steps for negotiating more effectively without becoming arrogant or pushy.

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March 30th

Laughter is wine for the soul – laughter soft, or loud and deep, tinged through with seriousness – the hilarious declaration made by man that life is worth living.

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11 Surprising Things Productive Writers Do Differently

You’re reading 11 Surprising Things Productive Writers Do Differently, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Robert Greene, Napoleon Hill, William Shakespeare and many others are great writers of all times.  It is obvious that there is something common among all of them; far beyond “sitting down and engaging in the act of writing” that makes them unique. Productive writers usually perform beyond limits. It is interesting to know that some things they do very differently, and other writers in their field do not pay attention to, are what make them exceptionally different. What makes them unique and exceptional among all writers?

The following surprising things are what they do differently, and have successfully placed them above other writers.

  • They consider writing a necessity:

Writing, as many view it, is what you do when you have your leisure, or what you can do when there is a need for it. Productive writers don’t see it as such. Their approach to writing is that which is unavoidably necessary. They write as if writing is their living pills.

  • They make writing a daily routine:

Creating a schedule for daily writing will not only make you a productive writer, but also an exceptional one in that field. Unlike other writers, who only write once in a while, or especially when they have a project to work on, productive writers have a plan to write inevitably each day. Even when they have no actual subject to write on, they create new ideas and develop it in writing.

  • They read more than they write:

The most terrible and lovely thing about being a productive writer is that they spend more time reading and studying than writing. Productive writers are of the opinion that, what your writing look like is proportional what you have studied and how well you have understood. They acquire knowledge and ideas through reading, and relate them to writing.

  • They are passionate about writing:

Productive writers understand the need for passion in their business; thus, develop a compelling enthusiasm for writing. They write very often and neither considers it boring nor time wasting, because of the strong emotional attachment they have for what they do.

  • They create time to write:

Everyone is engaged with different activities daily, no matter how busy a productive writer is, he/she will create time to write every day. They do not allow any other activity deprive them of the time to write and commit themselves to writing even it will cost them something.

  • They embrace Research:

Some writers and few non-writers often assume research to be a distraction from doing work. Some also term it to mean, duplicating other people’s work, and they thereby neglect it.

The renowned writer Robert Greene spends hundreds of hours researching books like Mastery and The 48 Laws of Power. Successful writers understand the significance of research. They spend adequate time finding answers to questions and then apply the answers in their own cognition to develop their writing.

  • They learn to work without Distraction:

Productive writers are aware of the dangerous impact of distraction, as it can disrupt ideas you have spent time storing in your head. They know quietness and being alone trigger deep thinking that enhances the creative process. Productive writers try to avoid distractions of any form when writing. They create spaces that are comfortable enough to write efficiently, and far from the reach of distraction. Another better approach to tackling distraction and maintaining a productive writing productive writers adopt is the use of text editors and writing apps, like Write! App, Writemonkey, Fargo etc. they enhance writing productivity and ensure distraction-free writing.

  • They take advantage of every idea:

Ideas are essential to writers. They are the foundations of every story and solutions to problems. While other writers ignore most ideas except the ones that meet their immediate needs, productive writers take advantage of every idea that comes their way, with the notion that, it will be useful later.

  • They are not money-focused:

Writing with the primary aim of making money may sometimes end up not yielding. But writing for the love of it without be money-centered will someday bring fortune. This is exactly what most productive writers do; they love to write because they find it fun and interesting, not because they want to turn rich overnight by writing.

  • They prioritize healthiness:

An unhealthy body cannot function properly. When the body is unhealthy, it affects the flow of ideas and presentation of them. Productive writers take good health as their priority, because they know it may successfully keep them away from doing what they love to do. Successful writers go to great lengths to keep themselves physically healthy so they have the strength to come up with new and better ideas.

  • They embrace failure and change:

Sometimes, it is not all what you write readers are interested in reading. You may write a book and do not get acknowledgment in return, readers may condemn what you have labored to produce. This is apparently a common thing in business. It fails and it succeeds. Great writers take advantage of every of their failure to learn. They find the reason for the failure and adjust in their future writing.

Being productive in writing requires commitment, dedication, diligence, discipline, passion, focus and tolerance.


Hi, I am David Jameson, a passionate freelance writer and an avid blogger. I like to help people become more successful and productive writers through my blog about writing on Medium.

My motto is “We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect“.

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How to Balance Freedom and Structure

You’re reading How to Balance Freedom and Structure, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Structure is something many of us absolutely love.

Whether it’s a calendar, mobile app, fitness tracker – you most likely use different tools to plan, track, and organise your life.

These tools enable you to live more intentionally. But when overused, despite all their incredible benefits, they can also stifle you. Here’s how:

– You get overwhelmed by the huge number of Apps you have to open each day
– You Stress out when your Smartwatch/Phone Battery dies
– You Feel burdened by the responsibility of keeping your Calendar up to date

For every tool you use, there’s a cognitive cost that you have to factor in.

Why you should Lower your Expectations of Perfection

However much I think I’m in control, life has a funny way of taking charge on its accord. I’ve noticed that when I’m too attached to my plans and tools when something wrong happens, I experience a higher level of stress than needed.

There are have been various instances in my life where i didn’t fill out my Calendar for the Week; I failED to accomplish my work by the end of the day; and I forgot to track my habits

Every time those situations would come up I would beat myself up for not being perfect. There was so much structure in my life (and not enough freedom) that when things deviated from the way I expected them to go, whether in my life or through relationships, I fell into a hole of disappointment. In that sense, the structures and tools in my life were imprisoning me rather than freeing me.

Life never goes 100% according to plan.

So I decided to change my tune and eliminate some of the tools I used and changed my philosophy. I started regularly thinking about how I’m managing both the freedom and structure in my life. Slowly, I learned to dance with the unexpected news, small failures, and “Happy” surprises. I came to realize that not having things not go to plan all the time, would help me grow as a human being.

Life never turns out exactly the way you want it to. Holding that truth in advance makes you less likely to act emotionally or irrationally when imperfections arise.

The value in this story is that you must learn to dance with not having control all the time, choosing instead to co-create with life – as opposed to doing things all on your accord. We need a balance between structure and freedom, uncertainty and productivity. That’s why when we use our tools, we want to use them with a slight leeway for imperfection. We also need to eliminate the tools that don’t serve us.

What happens to the man who is too attached to his tools? He becomes just as rigid as his pieces of software, lacking in the soft touch and light-heartedness that’s inbuilt into his nature.

“Life is partly about not knowing, having to change, taking a moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity” – Gilda Radner

Get the Perfect Balance

We do need some degree of control in our lives, but we also can benefit from more freedom. Maybe we do this by not wearing our watch one day per week, taking a day of the computer once per week, or visiting a new town one day per week.

We need to produce a system within our systems that enables us to break away from our mindset of control and productivity.

Balance the freedom and structure in your life, and you’ll experience more peace, calm, and emotional stability.

My Last Words

If you’re a creative and interested in learning how to upgrade the way you live your week, read my free guide on Spiritual Productivity.

  • You’ll learn about how to split up your day into four chunks, so you worry less about external influences.
  • You’ll discover the small hacks that will take your creative work on your PC to the next level. And much more…

 Samy Felice is a writer who is passionate about unique ideas related to living a meaningful life. His Free Guide explores ways people can make success easier.

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15 Habits of Mentally Strong People

You’re reading 15 Habits of Mentally Strong People, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.


Mentally strong people. Who are they? Are they successful? Are they happy? These are the perpetual questions, which have many different answers. First of all, they are people who can deal with problems and know their worth. Here are some features, which help them to keep the power.

Not giving up

Who knows, which impediments destiny prepares for us. We have to move on. For dear life, getting stronger, in every sense. Especially, in the sense of mental strength. This is the primary habit of such people.

No complaint

They won’t waste a lot of time on whining and blaming the fate for being unkind to them. The mentally strong people know, there’s no point. Stagnating isn’t the right choice.

No fear

It doesn’t mean they are fearless. They prefer not to show their fear and don’t let that fear take over them. Fear is  apprehension. In fact, the reason for the majority of fears is lack of self-confidence and negative thinking. This is not about mentally strong people.

Self-discipline

They are eager to continually develop themselves. That’s why most mentally strong people are self-disciplined and hardworking. It is a key aspect of success.

Taking risks

They take risks.

No matter which ones – financial, professional, emotional. They want that risk to pay a reward. They define the boundaries by themselves and consider it in their power to push the limits of what’s possible.

Control emotions

They feel the same as the others, but they try not to be the hostage to their emotions. They prefer to deal with what they’re feeling, privately – not in the public eye. All human beings have human feelings, but in this case, these feeling will hardly dominate.

Life plan

They have one and try to hold onto it. Their life is not a succession of disorderly events. They also have defined goals and move towards them thoughtfully. Successful people are mentally strong people. They achieve what they want because they know what they want, exactly.

Self-dependent

They don’t want to depend on others. This type of independence is based on self-confidence, responsibility for themselves and their fortune.

Against the grain

They aren’t afraid of struggling against the stream. They don’t need the approval of others. They do what they see and feel to be right. They have got their views on everything and aren’t afraid to express their opinions, even if it differs from others.

Realizing values

They know exactly what is valuable for them and try to keep to these values. The formation of values creates a particular mode of life, which determines everything.

Leaving the past behind

They live in the present and try not to allow the past interfere with their today life. If they do focus on the past, it’s only to remember the pleasant moments, which brought joy, strength and a smile. 

Flexibility to change

They don’t try to avoid change. They realize that change is the necessary part of life and success. They are not creatures of habit. They are ready to leave a habit behind if it doesn’t work for them. 

Getting around

Job, friendship, relations aren’t the anchor to suppress the development of the mentally strong person.Such people want the best for themselves, and if something dissatisfies them – at work, friendship or relations – they will go away and find something new.

Diligence

It’s comparable with self-discipline, but deserves  some special words. No pain, no gain. They know that firsthand. 

One lives and learns

This fact is quite obvious. Mentally strong people like to learn and not only in the sense of education, but in the sense of new things around and gaining experience. This creates for a richer life experience and overall fortitude.

All in all

Mental strength isn’t something you are born with. It’s a skill that you can learn and develop. Difficulties temper. Life teaches. Being weak or strong is a choice. In fact, it’s a dangerous thing to be weak in our world. That’s why we should be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, and, don’t let guard down.


Alina Kemakh is a marketing writer at Erminesoft, a mobile app development company. She likes writing on different topics because in writing she sees working of the mind and imagination.

You’ve read 15 Habits of Mentally Strong People, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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