You’re reading How to Stay Motivated (Even If You are Trapped in a Repetitive Routine), originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

It’s depressing, isn’t it?

Another day goes by and you don’t feel like you are any closer to your dreams.

You wake up every day and go to work to do the same thing as yesterday.

You feel like only the color of your shirt changes.

And you wonder if you should give up on your dreams altogether.

Stop!

You know those thoughts are destructive, not only to your dreams, but also to your happiness.

Do you want to live your life without dreams?

Dreams will take you places and make your life exciting.

Well, that is, if you are able to stay motivated to accomplish them.

Reignite your feeble motivation

We all go through ups and downs in search of our dreams. No matter if the dream is conquering credit card debt, getting a promotion, or starting your own million-dollar business.

Somewhere along the way your energy will drain, your problems will seem unconquerable or everyday repetitiveness will threaten to take you down.

But you are still reading because you want a solution. You don’t want to give up.

So here are five simple tricks that will put you back on track.

1. Slash your expectations

What? Every expert you read tells you to dream loftier dreams, to aim high.

The problem with big dreams is that they take a long time to accomplish. Everyone needs to win every now and then, even Tony Robbins.

To fix this problem all you have to do is divide the dream into smaller pieces. You’ll feel like a winner every time you conquer a smaller goal.

For example, if you want to publish a book, you would have to first find a topic, then pick a title, write the first chapter, and so on. Plan out how to get to the desired dream and make the different activities in the plan individual goals.

The smaller goals may not be as sexy as your big dream, but they will help you see your progress.

Which brings me to the next strategy.

2. Come up with rewards

Sometimes, just the feeling of accomplishing a task is a reward in itself. But let’s face it, some tasks need a lot more rewarding to get done.

Come up with a reward system. Take each of the smaller tasks that you divided your big dream into and make a reward for it.

Tougher tasks are going to need a bigger reward. If I had to do cold calling, I know I’d need a chocolate bar for each call I made, but that may be second nature to you.

Figure out what will get you going and stay flexible, you may need to divide those tasks into smaller ones and reward each one of them.

3. Create a happy picture

Since the smaller goals are not as sexy as your initial glamorous dream and you want to stay extra motivated by your big goal, it’s best to keep your big dream front and center.

On your road to success you want to daydream about your big dream, especially when you hit setbacks. You need to visualize the ultimate end result. And to visualize you need to create a picture in your mind.

If you print that picture and keep it visible you’ll quadruple your chances of success. Creating pictures is easy with Photoshop or the gazillion picture apps out there. If that’s not your thing old fashioned scissors and glue will do.

So, do you want to lose weight? Create a picture of yourself thin. Do you have your aim on a big pay raise? Create a picture of your new paystub. Keep your pictures in a visible place, maybe your bathroom mirror, and start every morning pumped up about your dream.

4. Vaporize distractions

We are possibly in the most challenging time of history regarding distractions. Distractions are everywhere. I’m sometimes not sure how we get anything done anymore.

Junk email is unavoidable, but you can limit it with a good spam filter. Other distractions are easy to manage. For example a cluttered desk, with piles of papers that leave you exhausted just to look at them can be fixed in less than an hour.

Then you have social media. You can tackle that if you choose to indulge in social media only as a reward after accomplishing a small task. Win-win!

If you want to achieve your dreams you need to get rid of distractions. Find out what robs you of most of your time and trim it down. Or start with a distraction that’s easy to fix.

5. Remember daring Edison

Once one of Edison’s associates asked him if he was discouraged by the amount of experiments he made which had failed. He replied “I haven’t failed, I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

Every man or woman who ever achieved great success experienced plenty of failure.

Start to see your failed attempts or mistakes in a different light. You can be depressed about them or, like Edison, believe that you are one step closer to your big win.

Stay positive even when something doesn’t work, you’ve just gained experience.

You get to choose if failures will bring you down or make you brighter.

Regain your excitement

Losing steam happens to all of us, it’s normal.

But it doesn’t have to stop you. Or kill your dream.

If you want to see yourself finally accomplishing your visions you need to learn to pick yourself up.

You need to learn to motivate yourself to stay on course. To avoid the pitfalls which will make you quit too early.

It’s not difficult.

Master the art of motivation today and see your spectacular dreams come true.

---

Corina Semph is a mom, designer, and blogger on a mission to help people transform their houses into peaceful and uncluttered homes, even if they have a problem getting rid off stuff.  Download her FREE Ultimate Cheat Sheet to Transform Your Closet from Crazy to Blissful in No Time.

You’ve read How to Stay Motivated (Even If You are Trapped in a Repetitive Routine), originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

http://ift.tt/2lGfHeE

You’re reading How to Stay Motivated (Even If You are Trapped in a Repetitive Routine), originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

It’s depressing, isn’t it?

Another day goes by and you don’t feel like you are any closer to your dreams.

You wake up every day and go to work to do the same thing as yesterday.

You feel like only the color of your shirt changes.

And you wonder if you should give up on your dreams altogether.

Stop!

You know those thoughts are destructive, not only to your dreams, but also to your happiness.

Do you want to live your life without dreams?

Dreams will take you places and make your life exciting.

Well, that is, if you are able to stay motivated to accomplish them.

Reignite your feeble motivation

We all go through ups and downs in search of our dreams. No matter if the dream is conquering credit card debt, getting a promotion, or starting your own million-dollar business.

Somewhere along the way your energy will drain, your problems will seem unconquerable or everyday repetitiveness will threaten to take you down.

But you are still reading because you want a solution. You don’t want to give up.

So here are five simple tricks that will put you back on track.

1. Slash your expectations

What? Every expert you read tells you to dream loftier dreams, to aim high.

The problem with big dreams is that they take a long time to accomplish. Everyone needs to win every now and then, even Tony Robbins.

To fix this problem all you have to do is divide the dream into smaller pieces. You’ll feel like a winner every time you conquer a smaller goal.

For example, if you want to publish a book, you would have to first find a topic, then pick a title, write the first chapter, and so on. Plan out how to get to the desired dream and make the different activities in the plan individual goals.

The smaller goals may not be as sexy as your big dream, but they will help you see your progress.

Which brings me to the next strategy.

2. Come up with rewards

Sometimes, just the feeling of accomplishing a task is a reward in itself. But let’s face it, some tasks need a lot more rewarding to get done.

Come up with a reward system. Take each of the smaller tasks that you divided your big dream into and make a reward for it.

Tougher tasks are going to need a bigger reward. If I had to do cold calling, I know I’d need a chocolate bar for each call I made, but that may be second nature to you.

Figure out what will get you going and stay flexible, you may need to divide those tasks into smaller ones and reward each one of them.

3. Create a happy picture

Since the smaller goals are not as sexy as your initial glamorous dream and you want to stay extra motivated by your big goal, it’s best to keep your big dream front and center.

On your road to success you want to daydream about your big dream, especially when you hit setbacks. You need to visualize the ultimate end result. And to visualize you need to create a picture in your mind.

If you print that picture and keep it visible you’ll quadruple your chances of success. Creating pictures is easy with Photoshop or the gazillion picture apps out there. If that’s not your thing old fashioned scissors and glue will do.

So, do you want to lose weight? Create a picture of yourself thin. Do you have your aim on a big pay raise? Create a picture of your new paystub. Keep your pictures in a visible place, maybe your bathroom mirror, and start every morning pumped up about your dream.

4. Vaporize distractions

We are possibly in the most challenging time of history regarding distractions. Distractions are everywhere. I’m sometimes not sure how we get anything done anymore.

Junk email is unavoidable, but you can limit it with a good spam filter. Other distractions are easy to manage. For example a cluttered desk, with piles of papers that leave you exhausted just to look at them can be fixed in less than an hour.

Then you have social media. You can tackle that if you choose to indulge in social media only as a reward after accomplishing a small task. Win-win!

If you want to achieve your dreams you need to get rid of distractions. Find out what robs you of most of your time and trim it down. Or start with a distraction that’s easy to fix.

5. Remember daring Edison

Once one of Edison’s associates asked him if he was discouraged by the amount of experiments he made which had failed. He replied “I haven’t failed, I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

Every man or woman who ever achieved great success experienced plenty of failure.

Start to see your failed attempts or mistakes in a different light. You can be depressed about them or, like Edison, believe that you are one step closer to your big win.

Stay positive even when something doesn’t work, you’ve just gained experience.

You get to choose if failures will bring you down or make you brighter.

Regain your excitement

Losing steam happens to all of us, it’s normal.

But it doesn’t have to stop you. Or kill your dream.

If you want to see yourself finally accomplishing your visions you need to learn to pick yourself up.

You need to learn to motivate yourself to stay on course. To avoid the pitfalls which will make you quit too early.

It’s not difficult.

Master the art of motivation today and see your spectacular dreams come true.

---

Corina Semph is a mom, designer, and blogger on a mission to help people transform their houses into peaceful and uncluttered homes, even if they have a problem getting rid off stuff.  Download her FREE Ultimate Cheat Sheet to Transform Your Closet from Crazy to Blissful in No Time.

You’ve read How to Stay Motivated (Even If You are Trapped in a Repetitive Routine), originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

http://ift.tt/2lGfHeE

You’re reading 3 Simple Mind-Shifts to Dramatically Transform Your Life, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

If there’s one thing you’ve without a doubt heard over and over again, it’s that mega-successful people think differently than the rest of us.

We’re all given the same 24 hours in a day, and we all have the same tools – the human body and mind – to make things happen, yet it’s painfully clear that some people just have that special sauce when it comes to achieving greatness and getting shit done.

Productivity and success become much easier when you have your health. I don’t think anyone would argue that. The human body is without a doubt something that can (and should) be optimized to transform your life, but the mind is the engine that drives it.

In this article, I’m going to teach you 3 simple mind-shifts that lead to more success, more happiness, and a radically improved life…but first, a story.

The Infamous Shoes Salesmen Story

Maybe you’ve heard this story before, maybe you haven’t. Either way, it’s a perfectly simplistic example that illustrates the difference between a positive mindset and a negative one.

It’s about a British shoe manufacturer looking to potentially expand their market into Africa. They decide to send two salesmen to investigate the situation and report back on whether or not they think it would be a worthwhile venture.

The first salesman reports back, “This is a terrible business opportunity, no one wears shoes.”

The second salesman reports back, “This is a fantastic business opportunity, no one wears shoes.”

This particular part of Africa might be a great place to sell shoes, or it might not be. Based on this story, we really don’t have enough information to make a truly educated call.

But regardless of which salesman was right, the second one had the positive mindset to see the potential and would be much more likely to try expanding the market to Africa.

This story, more than anything, is about seeing opportunities and benefits, instead of problems and disadvantages. We tend to restrict possibilities based on silly mental lies we tell ourselves to avoid discomfort, change, and disrupting the status quo.

How can you relate this back into your own life?

How many things have you not even tried doing simply because you talked yourself out of them?

Why You Must Change Your Mindset

All action is governed by some form of thought – conscious or unconscious – that precedes it.

This means that negative thoughts most likely yield negative actions, and positive thoughts yield positive actions.

I’m a firm believer that overnight success, except in a few rare cases, is a myth. It usually comes as a result of many positive actions applied over a long period of time. If you cultivate a mindset that supports and drives those positive actions, then success becomes the only possible result over a long enough duration.

Furthermore, just like true happiness comes from within (in the form of gratitude and self-love), most success begins as an inner journey. When you learn to master the thoughts, beliefs, and desires of your mind, you begin to act the way you feel.

Your mindset is by far the most powerful tool you have at your disposal.

It will either restrict you from ever getting started, or carry you farther than you ever thought possible.

Let’s dive in.

1. Stop Being the Victim

“If it’s never our fault, we can’t take responsibility for it. If we can’t take responsibility for it, we’ll always be its victim.”
-Richard Bach

There are some people in this world – and when I say some, I mean a ridiculous high number – who love to play the victim.

“This always happens to me.”

“Of course it rains when I’m on vacation. I’m not allowed to have a good time ever.”

“I’ll never get in shape. Thanks to my job I’m always tired and don’t have the time.”

You know the type. I know the type. We all know the type.

This line of thinking is so popular because it shifts the blame from ourselves to outside factors.

It’s much easier to not feel as bad about being out of shape when you can blame your boss instead of your own laziness and lack of prioritization.

It’s also easier to blame the weather for your miserable time instead of your lack of imagination or sense of gratitude.

If you want to get out of your funk and transform your life for the better, you need to stop blaming everything else and take responsibility for your own life. Yes, not everything that happens to you is your fault, but how you react is 100% under your control.

Escaping the victim mentality begins with awareness; catching yourself when you start shifting the blame to something else.

The more you practice this, the more you will realize how often you do it. Even I still catch myself doing this from time to time. Anyone who says they don’t is probably lying.

Focus on first becoming more aware, then focus on what you can do, instead of what you can’t. Over time this will start to become the norm, and you will no longer be the victim.

2. Ditch the ‘All or Nothing’ Mentality

 I saw a Life Pro Tip (LPT) on Reddit the other day…

“LPT: If you’re trying to break a habit, don’t say “This is the last time I’m doing it” to yourself. Instead, say “This is the first time I’m not doing it.”

It’s brilliant. And it’s something I’ve implemented in my own life without even realizing it.

Every time I’d try forcing myself to stop binge drinking or go to the gym, it would end in massive failure.

I’d come up with these totally awesome and viable plans like lifting 5 days per week for an hour each day, or no booze for a month – both 100% doable for someone who’s already developed those habits.

But for a beginner trying to make the change, I might as well have tried single-handedly solving world hunger. I would have ended up with the same result.

It wasn’t until I started approaching change as an option rather than a demand that I began to see positive transformation.

When I finally began eating healthier, I told myself “it’s OK if you go for the fast-food, but this time I’m going to choose the home-cooked meal because I want to.”

That might’ve been the only healthy choice I made all week at first, but I fucking made it.

Slowly, I began making more and more of these choices, continually building little win upon little win, until eventually, I was eating something healthy every day.

When you leave the bad option on the table, it becomes empowering to know that you made the better choice again, and again, and again…

That’s when it starts to stick. 

3. Approach Everything with a “Beginner’s Mind”

This is something Leo Babauta of Zen Habits talks about frequently. To learn how to fully adopt a beginner’s mind, I highly suggest you read one of his posts.

For the purpose of this article, I just want to jumpstart your brain a little bit.

The essence of having a beginner’s mind, to me at least, means having fun with things. Just like a toddler finds unbounded joy in exploring the universe around him, you can take that same approach for anything you want to do.

By looking at things with a beginner’s mind, you remove any sense of arrogance you previously held onto. You remove restriction.

Instead of being scared to start a business because you know the statistics, you explore the possibility of succeeding.

Beginners take things slow and always keep an open mind. They aren’t afraid to experiment.

Let’s say you’re trying to lose weight.

Previous knowledge convinces you that the Atkins Diet is the best and only way to go.

As you start working through the program, you remember the 3 or 4 times in the past you tried and failed. This time is no different.

So you decide to change things up. Maybe the Atkins Diet isn’t the only possibility.

You start by trying a bunch of different things – exercising, making healthier food choices, and eating less.

You eventually take in so much knowledge from research and personal experience that things start working for you.

It doesn’t happen overnight, and you’re OK with that.

You ditched the rigidity of a non-beginner’s mind and instead found something that actually works for you.

One of the keys to growth and massive change is admitting that you can’t possibly know everything there is to know, and that the only viable option is to embrace the learning you have ahead.

Where to Go from Here?

As you continue to practice these mind-shifts, you will slowly become a better person having done so.

Success, and the necessary changes to get there, will become easier and easier.

Your previously negative thoughts will turn to positive ones. You will begin to view a world of possibilities instead of endless restrictions.

Before long, you will become what seems a superhero version of yourself.

If you need any additional help in forming new habits or creating behavioral change, I’m no doctor, but I have compiled a ton of useful information in my Engineer Your Habits mega-guide.

Between that and my blog, I’m on a mission to help others create last change.

Now go do some positive thinking.

Jason Gutierrez teaches young professionals and entrepreneurs how to build better habits. He writes at themonklife.net about optimizing health, overcoming resistance, and achieving your goals. Sign up for his free newsletter to get practical advice and tips for becoming better, faster, healthier.

You’ve read 3 Simple Mind-Shifts to Dramatically Transform Your Life, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading The 7 Morning Rituals That Changed My Life, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

I’ve always wondered how successful entrepreneurs always stay energetic and motivated throughout their day. While it seemed that they were just highly driven people, there seemed to be no way I could achieve such a level of motivation.

And then, I came across an interview with Tony Robbins on YouTube where he talked about his daily morning priming routine. I was blown away.

It wasn’t Tony’s method that surprised me, it was the sudden realization that most successful entrepreneurs I’d read about followed specific daily morning routines.

With further research, I found that almost all productivity gurus emphasized the importance of morning routine routines in setting the pace for the rest of the day.

In a few short weeks, I started experimenting and testing some habits myself. And the effort paid off- I saw gradual improvement in my productivity and mindfulness throughout the day. And I’ve been following these routines religiously since then.

In this post, I’m going to explain the 7 morning rituals that changed my life for good.

1. Waking up at 6 AM

I know- this sounds very trivial. But let’s face it- how many of you actually wake up at 6 every morning?

The issue is that most of us need 7-8 hours of sleep a day- which is impossible if you’re running a business, and next to impossible if you have kids.

But this is the essential step because waking up early gives you the time to complete all your morning routines before you leave for office or send your kids to school.

And to the lazy ones among us (me included), waking up in the early morning is akin to hell. Luckily, I found a way to beat laziness and my sleep cycle.

In Hal Elrod’s Miracle Morning, he breaks down the 30-day cycle of creating a new habit into 3 phases: the first 10 unbearable days, the next 10 uncomfortable days and the last 10 unstoppable days.

The first 10 days are the hardest. And I beat my sleepiness in those 10 days using a simple Android app: the Sleep cycle alarm clock. This is a simple app that wakes us up when we’re in the lightest sleep phase so that we feel refreshed and relaxed when we wake up.

2. The Cold Bath

Some of you might have heard of Tony Robbins using cryotherapy to boost his neurons every day right after he wakes up. Well, the practice isn’t new.

Having a cold or warm bath right after you wake up is one of the best ways to quickly activate your internal organs and neurons. I prefer cold baths because I feel more energized and activated.

3. 3 minutes of Kapalabhati Pranayama

I’ll admit it- I stole this one from Tony Robbins’ priming routine. He follows a different version, but his version is derived from the actual Kapalabhati Pranayama breathing exercise.

I can explain in detail, but I learned the practice from this video:

While the actual Pranayama practice can take quite a bit of time, I believe 3 minutes of rigorous exhaling and inhaling should be sufficient for our purpose.

4. Matcha Tea

I lived in Japan for a while. Over time, I developed a love for Japanese culture. And the greatest blessing was that I developed a liking to Matcha- which is finely powdered specially grown Japanese green tea. Matcha has been consumed by the Japanese for over 900 years, and studies have shown that matcha has a wide variety of health benefits- partly due to the ridiculously high concentration of antioxidants and catechins (3-10 times more than green tea)

There are researches that point out how matcha improves metabolism and reduces the risk of cancer. Multiple studies also show that matcha reduces hair fall. I’ll stop bragging about matcha now.

I have a bowl of matcha every morning right after my breathing exercise. Matcha gives me a sense of calm alertness, and this primes my mind for the next three routines, while also energizing me. In fact, I intake matcha though a variety of matcha recipes throughout the day.

5. Gratitude

This is yet another morning routine that almost every single productivity guru talks about. While being grateful for what you have has little to do with productivity, it immensely helps in staying positive.

And this is exactly what I do:

I think of 3 things I’m grateful for. These can be anything as complex as achieving my blogging goals, or as simple as the gentle wind on my face. Being grateful for the simple things in life helps me a lot in staying positive throughout the day- it’s a practice I recommend to everyone.

6. Exercise

This one is obvious. Our brain runs on exercise. It’s one of the most healthy ways to improve brain and muscular function while reducing body fat.

You can choose any exercise that suits you. I’ve noticed that running is what works best for me. I have a quick 10-minute sprint with a break of 1 minute in between. That’s it.

I also have a quick body shower right after this to wash away the sweat.

7. 3 Minutes of Visualization

This one is straight out of the controversial movie The Secret. While I have different opinions about several other teachings in the Secret, visualization is a practice that I’ve found to be highly effective. In fact, almost all entrepreneurs I’ve read about practice this one routine.

This routine is just about visualizing your goals, and imagining that you’ve already achieved them.

I have a vision board where I stick or note down all my goals- and I simply take a quick glance at it, close my eyes for five minutes and just visualize myself as having achieved those goals.

And don’t routine by how it sounds. Visualization is the best way to condition your subconscious to the state required to achieve your goals.

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Catalin is the founder of Inspired Mag, and his current obsessions are Sun Ra and matcha tea.

You’ve read The 7 Morning Rituals That Changed My Life, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading 7 Easy Ways to Triumph Over Any Negative Day, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

You’re on your way to work and that’s when it happens.

The car breaks down.

You try to stay positive, but nothing seems to work. To make matters worse, you’re already exhausted because you slept in and had to skip your morning coffee.

So when you finally get to work, you can’t help but wonder how you could possibly get ahead on the mountain of tasks you have to do today.

The truth is that negative situations are inevitable and happen to us all.

The trick, then, is to be proactive and have a plan in place to counter them when they do.

Here are 7 easy ways to see the positive in everything that happens to you.

1) You Can Always Choose What You Fixate On

Sometimes when you focus so strongly on the negative things in your life, your mind gets blurry.

You lose focus because you start to get discouraged and soon that becomes all you can see.

But what if you viewed your setbacks in a positive way?

The next time you experience adversity in your life, choose to see it as an experience and something to learn from in your future. Remind yourself what you are grateful for to avoid slipping into negative tracks of thinking.

If you choose to see the good in everything, your mind will reward you for it.

2) Don’t Expect Good Things to Happen

William Shakespeare said that “expectation is the root of all heartache.”

In other words, if you expect good things to happen and they don’t, you’re only setting yourself up for failure.

Life doesn’t care about your intentions. Life doesn’t care that you want to have a positive day because it will make things happen to you, good or bad, regardless of how you feel.

And the sooner you accept that, the sooner you can start incorporating greatness into every day.

3) Always Ask: “How Did I Get Here?”

If you are where you are now, what really got you here?

Was it luck, chance, hard work, opportunity? Or something else?

Be honest with yourself.

If you know what you did to get where you are right now—deserved or not—how can you adapt your circumstances to achieve the future you want to see in your own life today?

4) Relish the Small Things

Focusing on the small things can catapult you 10x forward on your way to a more positive life.

It sounds like a cliché, but it works.

Because if you don’t stop to smell the roses, one day you may look back and wonder “why did I move so hastily through everything, instead of enjoying life after all?”

5) Do Random Acts of Kindness Every Day

As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting some on yourself.”

Don’t be frustrated at others when they don’t do something your way.

Instead, go out of your way to be courteous and perform one little random act of kindness for others every day.

6) Don’t Forget to Vent

Sometimes the worst thing we can do is try to reject our feelings and bury them under more positive ones.

So instead of feeling like you shouldn’t be angry or sad, try embracing these negative attitudes as they come.

It seems paradoxical, but adopting a state of constant acceptance in your life can help you be more positive in the long term.

7) Empathize with Others Constantly

Empathy is important. It’s key to understanding one another and a cornerstone when it comes to building friendships and forging new connections in our lives.

As Stephen Covey says, we each have our own paradigms. These viewpoints shape how we see the world and define what’s right and what’s wrong, what we like and don’t like, and what we choose to see and focus on around us.

Yet it’s not always easy to understand where someone else is coming from. Because, as Covey mentions, these paradigms mould our personalities and shape what we choose to see by giving us something resembling what we want to see out of every person or situation.

Yet, when someone violates our paradigm, we get offended. In cases like these, it can be helpful to step outside of ourselves and ask what would make a person act in a way we may find offensive.

For example, we can ask:

What are they going through? What battle are they fighting we know nothing about? How would I feel if I was them right now, experiencing what they have to go through every day?

It’s helpful to step back outside of ourselves and realize that if we were somebody else, we would be doing exactly what they’re doing right now because we’d be feeling exactly as they are right now.

By adopting these behaviours, we can adopt a positive understanding of the world around us.

It starts with understanding ourselves first, so that we can better interact with others and see the good out of everything, rather than the negative.

If we can do that, we can effectively set ourselves on a grand journey to come.

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Blake helps writers simplify the creative process so they can start writing more effectively today. Discover how to boost your writing by downloading his free guide “The Bulletproof Writer’s Handbook” today.

You’ve read 7 Easy Ways to Triumph Over Any Negative Day, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading The 5 Best Podcasts on Kindness, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Paying it forward. The norm of reciprocity. The power of empathy. These are all concepts within the practice of kindness. There are biological responses to kindness, as it releases chemicals in the brain that are the same as those when we experience love. Interestingly, it turns out kindness was a skill that helped our ancestors survive, a key evolutionary trail. There is a certain amount of it that can be cultivated and some that is genetically hard wired within us. The power kindness holds is one of action, for which people can connect with others, and oftentimes, with our own selves in the process. Here are 5 podcasts that touch upon the influence of kindness:

1. Spreading compassion into the world, one small gesture at a time. This podcast touches on the acts of kindness either toward someone we know or a complete stranger and how it can impact and change our lives for the better.

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2. This podcast lists 5 big ideas and action items to follow through with afterward. Teaching a child morals is a way of life that starts with the parents. The best way to do this is to make kindness and caring for others a priority, show them by example or have a casual dinner conversation about how you think a decision may impact others. It is also important to make your children show and express their gratitude.

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3. In this podcast the core roots of connection are discussed, to remind us of how loving kindness is intrinsic to all of us regardless of our experience or history. It is to be in a non-judgmental and quiet space within ourselves and toward others. We must be able to drop the obstacles in the way of us being open and able to connect.

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4. Connection to human emotion, sharing stories that people can relate to is the key to helping a society increase its level of compassion and kindness. In this podcast we hear the story of a young man, who began ‘unsung heroes’ – highlighting stories of everyday people, tapping into the working class, and what their particularly history is. People who watch this project, have helped those who are featured achieve their dreams, or find some happiness. His project has now moved into a full blown non profit organization that helps people through kindness.

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5. This Ted Talk video by Stefan Klein, is different in that it highlights a study that was done that shows that people are happier when they do good things for others. He touches upon the research in science behind how kindness evolved in the brain of our ancestors up to today, and how emotions are our motivations.

 

Being kind to ourselves and toward others is the first step in beginning to connect with the essence of what unites us all. A bonus finding in all this kindness research is that people who care for others are happier, healthier and live longer.

Do you read a great blog about kindness that’s not on the list? Leave a comment on FB!

Larissa Gomes is a breast cancer survivor and single mom to her spirited baby boy! Originally from Toronto turned Angeleno, she has worked in roles from writer, actor and producer for well over a decade. In that time, she’s developed concepts, film and television screenplays, short stories, along with freelance articles, blogging and editing work.

You’ve read The 5 Best Podcasts on Kindness, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading Earn More Respect For Yourself By Saying ‘NO’, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

‘No’ is such a simple word, yet saying it aloud is somehow harder than saying yes. In a society where saying yes is encouraged to get ahead in life, ‘no’ is a term that is generally associated with negativity and refusal, and many people believe that saying it can cost us a lot in adult life. In order to counteract this, we end up saying yes…a lot.

But saying yes too much can cause us to be over stressed and ultimately makes others value our time less. The more we say yes to someone, the more likely they expect us to say yes the next time they ask. So where do you draw the line?

In this post, we will give our top tips on how you can set healthy boundaries as well as how saying no can benefit us, not just in the workplace, but in other areas of life too.

How Do You Say No?

Many of us who self-identify as people pleasers will find it difficult to say no. But once you detach the phrase from its negative connotations, you will realize how easy and effective it can really be. Here are our four top tips for saying no:

1) Remind Yourself That The Decision Is Up To You

It’s important to have a good balance between saying yes or no, so before you rush to answer, ask yourself firstly whether you have time to fit this in, what you will gain by saying yes or no, and whether this person has helped you lately, if at all. You are totally within your rights to decline a request if you have too much going on, or if you don’t believe it is your responsibility to complete a particular task.

2) Give The Person Asking You An Alternative Solution

Offering someone an alternative solution and apology can help to soften the blow when saying no to something. For example, “I’m sorry, I would love to help but I’ve got two deadlines due for tomorrow”. Alternatively, if you want to do something but don’t have the time, ask for a rain check. By making a plan for the future, you are still showing good faith.

3) Remember That People Appreciate Honesty

Depending on the nature of your relationship with the person and the nature of the question, you may want to explain why you’re saying no. In some instances, no explanation is required, for example if someone says, ‘do you have time to fit xyz in, or shall I assign it to someone else?’ In other circumstances, you can explain that you have other commitments and why you can’t make it. If you’re honest and genuine, people will almost always understand.

4) Learning To Tolerate Others Reactions

Often, the reason for saying yes rather than no is because we are afraid of how the other person will react. In reality, we cannot anticipate everyone’s reaction, but if you start saying no more, people are more likely to give you respect and understand your boundaries, even though they may feel disappointed or upset initially. If you don’t set boundaries and continue to say yes, this may lead to feelings of resentment and bitterness towards that person in the future.

The Benefits Of Saying No

Saying no can be difficult, but it’s an important part of having healthy relationships and an overall sense of well being. We say yes because we don’t want to let others down or because we are empathetic to their situation, but ultimately, we warrant treating ourselves the exact same kindness that we give to others. Here are some of the benefits of saying no:

Saying No Prevents Others Taking Advantage Of You

Whether you’re in a situation where you’re doing extra work to bail out a colleague, or agreeing to dog sit for a friend despite having already made plans for the night, saying no is a way you can take back what is yours and regain the respect you have for yourself. Too often, people take advantage of the kindness of others, leaving the person being taken advantage of feeling resentful for saying yes to a situation they didn’t want to be in.

Saying No Gives You More Time To Spend On What’s Important

There are only 24 hours in a day, and although we may take this time for granted, it’s vital that we use it wisely. By saying no more, you can spend the little time you have left after a working day to do what makes you happy, whether that’s spending time with your kids, going for an evening walk or catching up with friends. Ask yourself what the person requesting a favour of you will be doing in their spare time.

Saying No Helps You To Better Achieve Your Goals

Harnessing the power of no is the best way to get where you want to be, faster. It is easy to assume that someone’s opinion of you may be changed if you say no to them, when in actual fact, true friends will value your time, and colleagues or managers will respect your desire to focus your attention on what’s important.

Saying No Increases Your Overall Well-Being

Your reason for saying no doesn’t always have to be work-related. Without self-care, how can we recharge ourselves to perform at our best in the workplace? Setting aside some time each day to relax and connect with ourselves is the best way to do that. Try taking a bubble bath, reading a book, or simply cooking yourself a good meal and you’ll soon see the benefits.

Once you grasp the concept of saying no, you will find you have more time for the things you love, while still maintaining good relationships at work. Give it a try and see how it benefits you.

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Arash Asli is at the forefront of business growth. As Co-founder and CEO of Yocale, he has a unique blend of technology, business development, corporate, and finance experience. Arash is honored to have been named the Business in Vancouver’s Top Forty under 40 business executive.

You’ve read Earn More Respect For Yourself By Saying ‘NO’, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading Feeling Stuck in Life? You Are Exactly Where You Need To Be, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

All of us have dreams.

One woman in particular, has always dreamed of becoming a star, singing in front of an international audience, and sharing her golden voice with the world. This was all she ever wanted.

It made sense, after all. Born into a musical family, her love for singing was nurtured early on to the sounds of laughter and the piano. Despite hardships she faced, she knew this was what she wanted to do.

Until one day, when it all came crashing down.

The music that she loved – and whom loved her back – ceased to play. No one heard her sing for almost two years. The woman, whose hope never faltered, found herself jobless and alone.

Believe it or not, this is the story of world-acclaimed singer, Susan Boyle. Who would have thought that before that historic moment in ‘Britain’s Got Talent’, she was at a standstill? Just when she thought that life – and music – was done with her, the world turns and she’s right where she needed to be all along.

If you, or someone you know, is stuck in life right now (for whatever reason), don’t be discouraged. But don’t be in denial either. This may sound strange, but accept the fact that maybe, all this ‘bad luck’ was supposed to happen for a reason.

Just like Susan eventually went up on stage to where she truly belonged, you too, will get to stand on the platform of your dreams.

But first…

1) Understand What Got You There

“In order to move on, you must understand why you felt what you did and why you no longer need to feel it.”

When people generally say they’re ‘stuck in life’, it could mean many things. Some are like Susan, who suffered from a tragic loss and now they don’t know what to do after that. Others could be living the dream – but they feel empty and stagnant inside. For a few folks, they might have given up on their dreams, convincing themselves that following the practical route is best decision nowadays.

Whatever the reason, feeling stuck is normal. At some point, everybody goes through with it. It’s different for everyone, and it could happen to both the young and old. But the important thing is to acknowledge that yes, YOU are stuck – but that’s okay.

Whether you’re at the crossroads of a job change or you’re grieving from a loss, allow yourself to be stuck. Feel everything that goes with it: the emptiness, the misery, the lonely nights. Cry, shout, laugh, and cry some more.

When you allow yourself to feel all these, you’re unknowingly letting go of what binds you.

When you allow yourself to immerse in the experience of feeling stuck – you can begin to understand WHY it happened. And there’s no better peace than finally knowing why you felt the way you did.

2) Keep Moving Despite The Odds

“Sometimes you have to do things when sad things happen.”

According to life coach Stephanie Zamora, it’s important that we take action despite feeling stuck in life. Remember: change is inevitable. Even if you don’t decide to move, things will happen eventually.

After analyzing your feelings and immersing yourself in a whirlwind of emotions, this is the next logical step. And believe it or not, you’ll eventually find yourself doing something despite nagging doubts, loneliness, or fears.

After Susan Boyle’s mother died, she kept volunteering at her local church. She did this even though she was out of work and most probably felt lost about her situation. It is through this simple act that ultimately led her to the stage. Had she merely stayed at home, things might have turned out differently.

It’s easy to just lie in bed and feel sorry for yourself. But even so, life continues. And if you don’t eventually catch up, it will move forward without you.

You don’t need to immediately do something drastic for it to be called action. Simply falling into old routines is enough. Not only does this serve as a distraction, but it’s also an avenue for life to bring you better opportunities.

Continue going to work, doing household chores, visiting friends, or volunteering in your community. Often, the best way to get ‘unstuck’ is to stick with old habits. After all, our routines provide order in our chaos.

You’re Stuck in Life Because You Need To Be

“That’s the thing. Sometimes when you sacrifice something precious, you’re not really losing it. You’re just passing it on to someone else.”

Years from now, you’re going to look back at these incidents and laugh about them. You’ll smile at the thought that once upon a time, you felt lost and afraid. One day, you’ll share how you overcame these challenges with your grandchildren.

Maybe the reason why you’re stuck in life right now is because you NEED to be. Perhaps you’ve been going too fast. This is probably life’s way of telling you to ‘slow down’. During your reflections and in your solitude, maybe you’ll realize the answer.

Or maybe not.

But in the meantime, have faith that all things pass. Troubles end, and day follows the night. Dreams die so new ones could take its place.

You’re reading this today because you’re exactly where you need to be. And so am I.

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Cristina Antonio is the EIC of scoopfed.com and a writer of all things related to world news, movies, real estate, health, or social media. She’s currently focused on helping healthcare workers find better career opportunities through Locum Tenens. Cris also enjoys painting, collecting toys, reading German novels, and lurking the Web.

You’ve read Feeling Stuck in Life? You Are Exactly Where You Need To Be, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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