If success in life is like winning an Olympic gold medal, mentorship is the coach that guided and pushed you through the grueling training. I’ve seen it in my own life. While I had to put in the work, my mentors and coaches helped me find the necessary confidence to ascend to new heights.

Highly successful people we read about today had mentors in the past: Suze Orman and Jillian Michaels; Warren Buffett and Benjamin Graham; Larry Page, Michael Bloomberg, and Steve Jobs. The tutelage of others got them where they are now.

This model of mentorship inspired me to pursue a career as a life coach. I believe successful people have a responsibility to relay their knowledge to others and, quite literally, change the world.

Coaching others can change your life.

While it’s the student who receives the slew of benefits from life coaching, the teacher doesn’t come away empty-handed. As a life coach, I’ve learned and grown in ways I didn’t know I could.

Guiding another human being through life requires that you keep your own in order. It exposes overlooked gaps of knowledge, and it refocuses you on helping others.

Life coaching can be mutually beneficial. While the life coach teaches through active listening, the client explores and confronts barriers barring him or her from success. Are you considering a career in life coaching? Here are three benefits you’re bound to experience:

1. Clarity in purpose: Bringing your goals into focus is the most effective way to improve your life. Sometimes it takes an outsider’s perspective to help a person get organized and plot out achievable objectives. These benchmarks lay the foundation for creating a daily game plan.

While coaching sessions aren’t dedicated to my own personal gains, working with a client means I need to get my own life together. It’s nearly impossible to help others live fulfilling, purposeful lives if I’m not doing the same. Therefore, I get the benefit of finding my purpose while helping my clients find theirs.

2. Accountability to grow: Those in a life-coaching relationship have something we all desperately need — accountability. If you report your successes, progress, and struggles, you’re more likely to follow through.

My career has given me a sense of selflessness. It’s easy to get caught up in my own life, and having someone else rely on me helps me keep any forays into self-centeredness in check.

For example, I had the opportunity to teach a 19-year-old young man how to ride a bicycle. Because I learned to ride at such a young age, I’ve always taken that luxury for granted.

I came away from the experience doubly happy. Not only did it give me the chance to share in a moment of joy, but it also allowed me to help my client build confidence and conquer new things — we both walked away smiling that day.

3. A view from 10,000 feet: Life can be so full of clutter that it’s hard to see the forest for the trees. A life coach helps craft a game plan tailored for you, your lifestyle, and your level of ambition. Although you are the only person that can work on you, having someone to help develop structure can be a game changer.

Life coaches aid pupils in figuring out who they really are. Having a hand in helping someone realize his full potential is wildly gratifying. Being a life coach lets me help wonderful people realize how awesome they are (and discover their true capabilities). It’s a deeply rewarding feeling, and one I hope I never take for granted.

I won’t compare myself to an Olympic coach, but I will say the experience of helping someone accomplish his or her goals is as rewarding as capturing the gold. I’ve been blessed with an incredibly satisfying career thanks to mentors, coaches, and friends. I hope everyone can experience such a beneficial relationship.

——

Matthew Arrington is the executive director and co-founder of Forte Strong, the world’s first failure-to-launch program for men who struggle to leave their parents’ homes or find it difficult to become independent. Forte Strong uses a proprietary coaching model to help students find purpose and direction, guide parents and families in empowering their sons, and ultimately create a healthier family dynamic. He is also the founder of Monster Mouthguards and currently resides in sunny St. George, Utah.

The post The 3 Huge Rewards of Being a Life Coach appeared first on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement.

http://ift.tt/1nRyswj

Have you ever tried setting goals for your life, only to fall off the wagon and drift back to your old habits? Have you ever wondered why goal-setting doesn’t seem to impact your life as much as it impacts the lives of certain successful people you know?

Like everything else in life, goal-setting is not just about knowing what your biggest goals are. It’s also about knowing where to set them, and how to achieve them. So if you’re currently stuck in a frustrating loop in your life, this article will help you fine-tune your goal-setting and goal-pursuing skills, so you can finally get that breakthrough you want.

Let’s start with the basics:

What Are Life Goals, Anyway?

Life goals aren’t those wishful, “would-be-nice-to-have” goals you set while daydreaming. Life goals are born out of pain, frustration, lack, and hurt. They drive you towards success, achievement, abundance, and happiness.

Simply put: If your goal doesn’t involve some sort of struggle, it’s just a pipe dream.

What Areas of Your Life Should You Have Goals In?

The key is to have goals across all important areas of your life, because let’s face it – there’s no sense winning in a few areas and losing in all the rest. While no two people are exactly alike, I believe we can all agree that the following areas of our lives are important enough to set our goals in. Although the specific goals I have included may not be something you are interested in, they are there to get you started.

• Health (To hit an ideal weight; To bench-press 300 lbs.; To run a marathon)
• Career/Financial (To retire comfortably; To become a CEO; To run your own business)
• Spirituality (To become a saint; To lead a ministry; To discover the meaning of life)
• Knowledge/Wisdom (To read 10 books a year; To earn a Ph.D.; To teach)
• Contribution to Society (To volunteer; To train millionaires; To feed the hungry)
• Family (To help my kids through college; To be the best spouse ever; To never divorce)
• Relationships (To get married eventually; To travel the world with friends)

The great thing about setting life goals is that it brings a host of benefits into your life the moment you set them. Here are five of the best ones:

1. You Find What Makes Your Heart Sing

Goal-setting helps you find those achievements and activities that make you truly, completely feel that you have a place in the world. In all areas of our lives, we have our “bare minimums” in order to truly be happy. Your life goals should revolve around achieving those bare minimums to bring you maximum happiness.

2. It Gets Rid of the Junk in Your Life

Why do many people stay poor and unsuccessful? Answer: It’s because of the “junk” in their lives. These are the things, activities, and relationships that do NOT push them closer to their goals, but instead bind them to failure, fear, and frustration. Your life goals will help you identify the “junk” in your life so you can get rid of them – fast.

3. It Fills You With Unbreakable Confidence

No matter what you do in life, there’s a simple guarantee, “You’ll do it better, and you’ll enjoy it more, when you have confidence.” And life goals will fill you with that intoxicating, unbreakable kind of confidence. Suddenly, life’s no longer about what other people say or think about you – it’s about your goals, and nothing more.

4. It Gives You a Much-Needed Sense of Urgency

When you have specific goals in your life, you’ll soon realize how little you have to work with. You have limited time, limited resources, and limited energy. It fills you with a sense of urgency, giving you the motivation to drop the junk in your life, make the necessary adjustments, and give it everything you got, every single day of your life.

5. You Make Smarter, Rock-Solid Decisions

Another critical flaw that unsuccessful people have is indecision. They’re bogged down by all the options around them that they end up not making decisions at all. But when you have goals, you’ll know immediately what comes first between your family, your work, your friends, your church, and so on.

How to Set Goals

Most experts will tell you to set SMART goals: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Rewarding, and Time-Bound goals. In other words, they have to be realistic and achievable, and set with a deadline.

A good way to ensure your goals are as SMART as they can be is to make sure your big goals are breakable. You want to be able to break the bigger goals down into to smaller goals and the concrete processes needed to achieve them. It’s one thing to have goals – and it’s another thing to have a detailed plan of action to achieve them. Be sure to have both!

Bonus Tip: It’s Okay to Fail

One last tip about goal-setting: You’re going to fail sometimes, and that’s okay.

Two things trip many unsuccessful goal-setters in the long-run: the sheer pressure to achieve their goals, and the sheer disappointment they feel when they fall off the wagon. And yes, it does get frustrating sometimes.

But that’s precisely why we need to break our goals down into to smaller, ridiculously easy ones, and then fall in love with the processes necessary to achieve those goals. That way, when you do fail, you’ll fail quickly – and you’ll also get back up quickly.

As you travel closer towards your goals, remember that the road is never a straight one. At best, it’s a meandering path. And your goals may change when your life situation changes, such as when you suddenly have to raise a new family or have to lead a new company.

That being said, goal-setting is still one of the most empowering, and indeed most noble, undertakings we can ever make in life. As a wise man once said, “We were not made for comfort – we were made for greatness.”

Step towards greatness now. Set your goals, make a plan, and be great!

Tom Casano is the founder of Life Coach Spotter.  To learn more about reaching your goals, see our complete guide to finding your life coach.

The post 5 Little-Known Benefits of Setting Life Goals appeared first on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement.

http://ift.tt/1LrXSw8

I began to wonder how many other things flew under my nose daily. What if I slowed life down? What would I see? I needed to become aware of the functional and dysfunctional world both around me and within me. I wanted to be a new person, but I needed to know what I was up against first. I needed to incorporate mindfulness into my life: a mental state achieved by focusing one’s awareness on the present moment while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations.

A therapist might say, “let’s start” by focusing on your breath. The monk, Bhante Henepola Gunaratana, once said: “When we truly observe the breath, we are automatically placed in the present.” To achieve this state, you’re not allowed to control your breath, and you must let your breath move in its natural rhythm (like while sleeping).

Lie back, relax, and focus on your breath moving in and out like waves massaging the shore. Any time there’s a distraction—a thought about pressing projects at work, random characters on television shows you’re watching, or anything else—place the idea on a boat and let the river take it away. Listen to every sound around you: A dog barking in the distance; the subtle cracks in the wood; your neighbors yelling at each other; your neighbors yelling at you for meditating on their front lawn; whatever it is, name it and continue to focus on your breath and…

Okay, I probably lost you. You either fell asleep or struggled to relax and focus on your breath. Your breathing might have become ragged because while you’re trying not to control your breath, you feel an incessant need to force it. As you do this, it may cause you to begin breathing irregularly and move you away from a relaxed stress.

Meditation is initially stressful and the reason people avoid it. “It’s so simple though,” people will tell you. It’s not. You’ve trained yourself to multitask and do a million things at once in everyday life. It’s different to remove yourself from this mindset and slow down for a moment.

If you practice meditation, it will open your mind and help you look at your reality. Many people find that their reality is far more chaotic and disorganized than they ever imagined. You might have the same realization.

Unless you’re the musician, Sting, who can meditate for four hours, any moment of mindfulness (awareness of now with total stimulation of your senses) is a success. With practice, you’ll realize it isn’t as hard as it seems—especially if it is only 10 seconds at a time. The goal is just to wake up to life around you—and inside of you—at any given moment. The toughest part is not passing judgment. You are just naming what you see, hear, smell, and think about. You are awakening yourself to a new reality.

In my phone, I found an application (Simple Routine) that allows me to schedule alerts throughout the day. I receive a “take a breath” alert four times and do this no matter where I am at or what I am doing. These reminders help me successfully integrate a form of meditation and mindfulness with minimal effort into my life.

When you practice mindfulness, you are returning to the simplest process of you: breathing. Start with a single breath. Breathe all of the way in; all of the way out. You want to inhale fully and then exhale. If a thought infiltrates this moment, name it and allow it to escape your mind peacefully. You can place your thoughts about work and other stresses onto a boat and push it a down ‘that mental river’. You are slowing down your life for one moment. You are incorporating mindfulness into your life.

A few years ago, I first practiced meditation at the Mystical Yoga Farm on Lake Atitlan in Guatemala, just a few months after my divorce. Lake Atitlan stood in total solitude in the middle of three volcanoes. The sunrise peaked over the top of each volcano every morning and slowly lit the fog crawling over the water. It was the perfect setting for breathing and thinking about breathing.

It was also the setting for four days of alcohol-free socializing and vegetarian cooking. In between yoga and permaculture sessions, I snuck out to a hammock and wrote in my journal before falling asleep.

It was simplicity in its most natural form and freedom from the stresses of the world. It was a self-sustaining commune without the pressures from work, family, and everything else.

I pleasantly awoke every morning at 5 a.m. to the voice of a French woman singing outside of the cabins. It was a calm, gentle wake-up call—and a fitting one—before we embarked to the pier for morning meditation.

On the pier, the mix of guests from all over the world—German, Australian, South American, North American, and more—sat cross-legged and faced the sun hiding behind the volcanoes. Birds were chirping and flying toward the calm water, looking for food while a slowly rocking boat nearby made subtle sounds of wood rubbing on wood.

Now, picture me in the middle of this band of meditators, fidgeting and wondering why I am the only who can’t cross his legs comfortably. I’m closing my eyes and listening to the subtle sounds of nature.

I begin to focus on the waves of breath with the guided help of our instructor.

And now…I wonder how the Chicago Bears football team played on Sunday…I wonder when we’ll eat breakfast.

My left eye opens. I peer to my left and wonder, “Is anyone else distracted?” Then I close it before opening my right eye. “I mustn’t be the only one.” Funny enough, another American was doing the same.

I wasn’t alone, but I felt like the first morning was a failure. The next few mornings I awoke early and practiced with my new American friend.

I improved and found what works for me: staring at moving water or the flame of a candle. In fact, by day four of my “mystical” journey, I stared at the candle for over three hours while seated in the same position.

I was able to focus on some “thing” moving while letting my breath flow naturally. I found a way to jump outside of my thoughts and separate myself from them: the routine of life, the pull of my business, or any other stressors.

I still practice this in small amounts in my daily life. The best example of this takes place during disagreements with my girlfriend. I have a tendency to overreact and raise my voice. And in these metacognition moments, I remove myself from ME and focus on my breath. I concentrate on full inhalation and exhalation. It’s during these moments that I have now been able to take a breath, concentrate on the now, and remove myself from instinct and emotion – and I don’t need to meditate for hours to do this. I’m able to slow my thinking and regain control over a moment. I sometimes catch myself thinking, “Why am I overreacting?” or “Why am I saying this?” while it’s happening. I recognize the irrational words before I begin to speak them.

I found out that this was more common than I thought. I can’t say that this was the realization that I was looking for when I started this process. It does remind me of what I was overlooking, however. While mindfulness will open your world of awareness, it will also show you the good, the bad, and the ugly. You’ll need to accept what you find for the time being before creating the life you want.

Today, you’ll start by taking a breath.

*************

Looking for other ways to redefine your life? Check out my recent article 50 Ways to Change Your Life Today too.

*************

Michael Moody is the author of the self-improvement book Redefine Yourself: The Simple Guide to Happiness and the former fitness expert on NBC’s The Biggest Loser/MSN Chicago tour. The owner of the successful Chicago personal training business Michael Moody Fitness, his fitness and life-structure programs have helped his clients lose more than 2,500 pounds since 2005. Michael has been featured in Muscle & Fitness and Today’s Chicago Woman magazines, among others. During his time as the official trainer for PBS’s The Whitney Reynolds Show, he also produced an inspirational segment about his travels in Guatemala.

Having researched emotion and coping behaviors in university-level studies, Michael has presented various fitness, motivation, body image, and stress-manage

The post The Importance of Practicing Mindfulness in a Chaotic World appeared first on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement.

http://ift.tt/1M8tqHx

“Never leave that till tomorrow which you can do today.”

– Benjamin Franklin

Procrastination delays life. It’s a major reason for shame and self-frustration. Sometimes, we wonder why we can’t just do what we need to do. The answer is simple, but it isn’t quite as simple as “just do it.”

Not many realize this, but with deep roots that tie into perfectionism, procrastination is impervious to most surface-level attempts to thwart it. It is not a motivation problem. To stop procrastinating, we must think very targeted thoughts that attack its roots. Here are five thoughts that stop procrastination from the source!

1. “It can be flawed.”

Say you’re procrastinating on writing your book. It’s probably because you want the book to be really good. A secret that all seasoned writers know is that the first draft is never pretty. This creates a dichotomy between what you can do and what you want to do. Until this discordance is resolved, you’ll stay inactive.

To empower yourself to do amazing things in life and to conquer procrastination most of the time, all you have to do is give yourself explicit permission to be and act imperfectly. This closes the gap between what you want to do and what you can do and enables you to take action.

Procrastination is rooted in perfectionism, so when you stop aiming for perfection, the floodgates of productivity will open for you. Try it and you’ll see.

2. “What’s one good thing I can do right now?”

Procrastinators are perfectionists, and one way that substantiates is the desire to choose the very best task. With nearly unlimited options, trying to pick the best course of action can paralyze us. By thinking in terms of something good you can do right now, you take off some of the pressure to make the perfect decision.

Doing something good beats thinking about doing something great.

3. “How can I make this easier?”

The solutions so far have been targeted thoughts to decrease internal resistance to action. One of the most basic ways to decrease resistance is to make your target behavior easier. And the best way to do that is to shrink it!

• Instead of aiming to write 2,000 words, aim for 50 (you can always write more).
• Instead of pressuring yourself to find a wife, try to find a friend.
• Rather than attempting to build a profitable business, attempt to sell one item or service.

Everything is accomplished in steps.

“Small steps are not weak, they are precise.”

~ From Mini Habits

4. “Process and progress are everything.”

The final, potent procrastination-killing thought attacks result-based thinking. When we get too focused on obtaining a certain result, we lose sight of the process. This is lethal to our success! 

For example, if you’re obsessed with getting a six pack, then you’ll think about how one workout today isn’t enough to accomplish that. If you’re obsessed with having a New York Times bestselling book, all of your marketing attempts will seem futile. Ultimately, this discourages positive action and causes procrastination.

Forget about the result you want from your actions. Switch your attention to the process—what steps will lead you to a better place than you are now? When you focus on the process, you’ll make the most progress, and progress in any amount is worth celebrating! Life is challenging, and to be the type of person who is constantly moving forward will set you apart.

Most people wrestle with procrastination every day and they can’t figure out how to beat it. Day after day, they let their perfectionism, massive goals, and results-based thinking prevent them from taking simple steps to improve their lives. Think these four thoughts when procrastinating, and you’ll watch your resistance melt before your eyes like a snowman in Florida.

1. What’s one good thing I can do right now?
2. It can be flawed.
3. How can I make it easier?
4. Process and progress are everything (don’t worry about the result).

If this intrigued you, you would love my latest book, How to Be an Imperfectionist. It exposes the many problems that perfectionism causes—including procrastination—and provides doable solutions to reverse this harmful way of thinking. 

I’m Stephen Guise, the founder of Deep Existence, a blog about creative strategies for lasting change. Click here to get 3 exclusive gifts and insightful life tips from me every Tuesday morning.

The post 4 Thoughts to Stop Procrastinating Instantly appeared first on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement.

http://ift.tt/1R1W9KJ

A specific category of herbs, those considered adaptogens, can simultaneously improve focus and productivity while relieving anxiety. They work by helping the body cope with, and resist the effects of stress, properties that originated because the plants themselves have a unique ability to ‘adapt’ to stressors and other challenges in their environment.

As herbal medicines, adaptogens are defined by 3 main characteristics: they (1) are universally nontoxic, (2) create a normalizing effect no matter which direction an imbalance occurs, and (3) increase resistance to the impact of stress.

In effect that means, adaptogenic herbs generally
– reduce the body’s stress response by regulating the production and clearance of cortisol,
– promote relaxation,
– speed recovery (from workouts, fatigue, or stress),
– protect the nueroendocrine cascade (including the hypothalamus, pituitary, and adrenals),
– improve the amount and quality of mental work, and
– increase longevity and libido.

Though there are about 20-25 herbs widely recognized as adaptogenic in nature, they vary in their targeted uses. Some are more stimulating, others more calming, some more effective on the the immune system and others on the reproductive system.

Below you’ll learn about five adaptogens whose actions are specifically associated with increasing focus and simultaneously reducing anxiety. These five enhance mental clarity and brain function, thus contributing to more time on-task, sharper thinking, and greater overall productivity.

Schisandra

Schisandra (wu wei zi in Chinese medicine) is actually one of the most accessible and useful adaptogenic herbs. It is extremely safe, has many different uses, and makes a surprisingly flavorful tea.

Among adaptogens, it is unique in that it is simultaneously both calming and stimulating. It helps to relieve mild anxiety and provide a feeling of alertness without caffeine-like jitters. Research suggests it improves reflexes, work performance, mental activity, and reading comprehension and speed.

In addition, schisandra has a normalizing effect on blood pressure and is both protective and healing for the liver.

Look for it as whole dried berry for herbal tea or decoction, powdered berry (to add to smoothies), or as a capsule or other herbal supplement.

Rhodiola

Rhodiola is most renown for it’s effects on memory and concentration. It’s other effects include enhancing alertness, improving endurance, and reducing fatigue. In addition, rhodiola reduces cortisol levels while boosting mood hormones such as serotonin and dopamine. (Low serotonin levels are often linked to anxiety.)

Regular, long-term use improves learning, memorization, and the production of endorphins that relieve stress and pain.

It is said to improve both male and female reproductive function that has been hampered by stress.

To conceal it’s rather unappealing flavor, it’s most commonly found as an extract in an alcohol tincture or capsule.

Eleuthero

Eleurthero was originally termed Siberian Ginseng because of it many similar effects to that of Asian Ginseng, though no actual botanical link was found.  They’re similar in that the two herbs support both physical and mental energy.

More specifically, eleuthero is known to boost stamina, endurance, and performance, and reduce recovery time. For that, it is also popular among athletes.

Eleuthero is also used to improve mental clarity and enhance short-term memory. For those overworked, stress-out types, it can increase alertness and cognitive function, while also improving quality of sleep.

Generally eleuthero root is found in tincture and capsule form, or possibly made into a tea or decoction.

Gynostemma (Jiaogulan)

Gynostemma, or jiao gu lan as it’s know in Traditional Chinese Medicine, is considered a calming adaptogen, helping to alleviate anxiety, stress headaches, and the insomnia caused by a racing mind. Traditionally gynostemma was used to relieve fatigue, while increasing endurance as well as longevity.

Jiaogulan tea is drunk all across Asia in the morning to increase energy, during the workday to enhance concentration, and in the evening to ease tension and promote relaxation.

Furthermore, it enhances both the immune system and antioxidant activity, including production of superoxide dismutase (SOD).

Gynostemma leaf and stem make a very palatable, even sweet tea or can be added to soups and stews; it’s also found as a tincture and capsule.

Ashwagandha

Ashwagandha is likely a familiar name to anyone who’s studied Ayurvedic herbs. It is one of the more calming adaptogens, appropriate for the wired and frazzled crowd. Still, it helps relieve fatigue and increase strength, stamina, memory, and reaction time. It’s used to stimulate the mind thus relieving brain fog.

Ashwagandha is also effective at alleviating anxiety and stress-induced insomnia; it’s also popular as a libido booster.

It should be noted that ashwagandha has a direct on effect on the thyroid, so cycling on-off is recommended. Anyone with a hyperthyroid condition, sensitive to nightshades, or suffering from excess iron should avoid it.

Ashwagandha is most widely available as a tincture, decoction, or capsule.

As with most adaptogens, the effects are cumulative, so it may take 1-2 weeks before effects are noticeable.

If you’re unsure which to choose, consider this: rhodiola and eleuthero are slightly more stimulating, while gynostemma and ashwagandha are more calming; uniquely, schisandra is both. But, as always, before diving into an herbal regimen, it’s best to consult a health practitioner.

And, of course, when looking to enhance cognitive function, focus, and productivity, the basics of a healthy life are still paramount: eating a nutrient-dense diet, getting sufficient sleep, and engaging in regular physical activity.

 

Sources: Adaptogens: Herbs for Strength, Stamina, and Stress Relief by David Winston and Steven Maimes, and “Nootropics: The new adaptogens” by Renee Davis on the Goldenroot Botanical Medicine blog.

—

Toffler Niemuth is an author, entrepreneur, and educator passionate about empowering individuals to take care of their own health and vitality. She does so with her wellness tea blends, BeLight and BeBalanced, which help individuals forge a new path toward better health. She fell in love with tea during her six years living in Asia, where she also obtained certificates in Chinese Medicine and Ayurveda. She shares her passion for tea, herbs, and a healthy lifestyle through writing and speaking.

The post 5 Herbs to Increase Focus, Productivity AND Reduce Anxiety appeared first on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement.

http://ift.tt/1RkzNDx

Bored with life? You’re not alone.

As a whole, we are a boringly predictable species. We follow the same routines and do the same things day in day out; brushing our teeth, standing in our queues, drinking our coffee, staring at our screens.

As soon as we find a comfortable routine, we shutdown and turn to autopilot. We can be really productive in this way, building great things and solving complex issues.

But stay in this mode too long, and we become distant, passing by new and interesting people and opportunities, drifting further and further apart.

We quickly get stuck in this cycle, ironically contemplating the same single thought. We’re secretly waiting for someone or something to shake things up and bring us back to life.

How often we hear those chance encounters are the ones which grew into strong bonds and relationships, even marriages and families. We know this, yet we latch onto the predefined and safe idea in our minds that our lives will somehow work out.

Although we try, we can’t plan our lives around what we don’t know. So let go of any flaky plans and embrace spontaneity. Starting….

Now: DANCE!

For some reason the universal law of what is socially acceptable goes out the window at night. As soon as darkness descends, we let our inhibitions go and shake our booties like wolves set loose to howl at the moon. Dancing shouldn’t strictly be nocturnal, so wherever you are, whatever the time of day, dance!

Ask A Stranger Questions

Some of the most interesting conversations start with asking a stranger a question. Ask one too many, and you risk coming across as plain weird, ask too few, and any spark will die abruptly. Stick to what feels right—two or three usually does the trick.

Follow The Fear

It can be something as small as talking to the checkout lady, or as big as entering a singing competition. We avoid our fears so often that we often fail to realise when we are doing it. Identify what makes you cringe and gets your heart pounding, and head straight towards it—you’ll feel amazing.

Offer Someone a Hand

One of the greatest and most simple pleasures in life is helping someone in need. It could be an elderly man walking home with his groceries, a lady attempting the stairs with a pram, or a young couple struggling to read a map; whoever it is, they will be sure to appreciate a helping hand.

Reach Out For Help or Advice

In the same way we love to help others, they usually jump at the opportunity to help us too. Many people would love to share their skills and wisdom, but are just afraid or don’t know how to do it. Let someone help you, and learn something new at the same time.

Pay Someone A Complement

This one always goes down a treat—as long as you avoid scripted chat up lines and wolf whistles.

Pretend You’re a Child

As children the world is our playground—even if we don’t venture further than our backyards. When we grow up, we can jump higher, walk further, ride buses alone, book flights; our playground just got a whole lot bigger, so play with it!

Take a Wrong Turn

Take a new route home and explore the streets and areas you are unfamiliar with. It’s surprising what you find right on your door step.

Say Yes, Yes, Yes!

Often we don’t give ourselves the chance to experience new and interesting things because of our obsession with what we know. We perceive the uncertain and unknown as flashing red warning lights, when in reality they should be green for GO. Say yes and if all goes wrong, at least you’ll have an interesting story to tell afterwards.

Start A New Hobby

Hobbies take commitment. Remember that painting set that you used once and stored away in the cupboard? Or those dancing classes you keep promising to start? Much enjoyment is lost due to our laziness and fear of failure. Throw away hesitation and throw yourself into a new hobby. Whether it lasts a few weeks or a few years, the act of enjoyment in the now is all that matters.

Do Something Out of The Box

We often limit ourselves in what we do by our small circle of knowledge and experiences. Choose an activity that has never interested you, and you’re sure to learn more than you anticipated.

Stop Thinking

Thinking is overrated. Our brains rob us of more opportunities than we will ever know. Trusting your gut and taking the path less traveled can get you back in tune with your feelings and emotions and inject new life into your day.

Flirt!

A little bit of harmless flirting holds all the ingredients of spontaneity: the blushing cheeks, the surprising remarks, the impulsive gestures. What’s more, you’ll get a strong hit of Oxycontin, and who knows, maybe even a phone number.

Connect With An Old Friend

Technology and social media leaves us no excuse for keeping in touch with long lost friends from school and childhood. Everyone is just waiting for the other person to finally get over the awkwardness of how long it’s been. Be the other person.

Offer To Teach Someone

Everyone has something to teach. It could be how to play an instrument or format a word document, but it could also be an old recipe of your grandmas, or if you’re really stuck, your native language. Teaching brings out the best in us and allows us to extend our worth out into the world.

Connect With a New Person

Today we can make new friends with just the click of a mouse. But when was the last time you felt the buzz of connecting with someone in person? Online friendships shouldn’t be shunned altogether, but rather seen as a mode to a relationship of greater meaning in the real world. Why not start now by connecting with me?

Want to make sure you get everyday off to the best possible start?

The post 16 Ways to Beat Boredom And Make Your Day More Spontaneous appeared first on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement.

http://ift.tt/1LnEoIU

There are a thousand things to do today, there were a million things to do yesterday, and now you’re lying in bed dreading the rest of it. Don’t dread the day, have a perfect day. Everyday. By setting it up right, and treating your morning with respect.

Treating your morning mindfully creates an environment of success that will follow you through-out your day. The most successful people wake up early, and do things once they wake up, practice what they preach, practice mindful mornings, and emulate their success. Wake up early, allow yourself time to do the things you want to, and unlock the keys to a delightful day.

Do. With Purpose.

Make time for what needs to be done, and remember the purpose of all the actions. Waking up and making coffee sucks, but waking up and making coffee so you can be the most productive person in the office is making a fat pot of super juice every morning. It’s infinitely more purposeful to wake up and only do things that are vital to your day. It can help you eliminate some of the less helpful tasks from your day. For example, while waking up and cleaning your house might feel like utter trash; waking up and removing the possibility of parasites, clearing clutter, and not forcing yourself to do it tonight,will leave you with an amazing, refreshed feeling.

Remain calm

Calm. Zen. Take a moment. Scrambling around the house for a missing set of keys might seem the fastest way to find your keys, but taking a breath and thinking about it for a moment will help you find your keys a little faster. It’s the same thing for the rest of your morning tasks: taking the time to enjoy your shower will get you in and out far faster than furious scalp scrubbing and speed rinsing. Cooking a solid breakfast will get you through the rest of your day faster AND will end up a lot quicker than cleaning up a spilled bowl of cereal. Calmly transitioning through tasks rather than multitasking or scrambling through them, will create a better morning and will set-up an amazing day.

It might seem a little counter-intuitive, but staying calm, and enjoying your time spent on each task (even the heinous ones) will move the morning faster, leave you with a little extra time, and a slightly happier. It will also prevent multitasking overload too early in the morning and force you to focus on one thing at a time. This can be especially important for people who work from home. The transition between hectic home life, and actual working time is vital for anyone who needs to avoid the dreaded distractions that come from working at home.

Make Time for What You Enjoy

Or at least something you want to do. The rest of your morning might be shovelling horse manure out of barn stalls, but gosh darn, making time to do something that you like can make manure less smelly. Life sucks sometimes, and your morning might be a terrible task laid forth in front of you, but back to being mindful, find something to make you happy. For me it used to be sitting in my backyard with a cup of tea every sunrise. My day sucked, but it sucked a little less if I got to watch the sun scrawl pink and orange across the sky and reflect its long limbs across the valley while my sleep numbed fingers warmed themselves on a glowing mug of something bitter and burning. For some people, they like to meditate or read, it’s not what you do, it’s that you enjoy it. Enjoy a modicum of time every morning and reduce your stress load throughout the day.

Why Will This Make a Great Day?

Your morning makes your day, and it’d be silly to discount the effects of your mood on the rest of your life. Forgetting breakfast, doing everything you hate (like cardio), and all in a stressed rush will only pass through to the rest of your day, but setting yourself up for an attitude of success will only make your day more effective, happier, and all around better.

———–

Mary Grace lives in the beautiful Boise, Idaho. She loves exploring. Everything. Tweet her @marmygrace or email her directly at marmgrace(@) gmail.com if you have any questions or just want to chat!

The post 4 Ways Mindful Mornings Will Turn Into Boss Days appeared first on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement.

http://ift.tt/1RK40MN

I’m lazy. That’s right. And there’s nothing wrong with being lazy at all.

To give you context, here’s what I mean when I say I’m lazy.

If I could snap my fingers and have my dinner prepared for me in a flash, I’d do it without a doubt. That would save me a LOT of time.

If I could turn my laptop on by pressing a button on my smartphone (someone should invent that), then I’d gladly do it.

If I had to decide between shopping online and shopping offline in the supermarket, I’d do it online because it takes less time and less effort.

If I had to choose between shopping in the day time and shopping at night, I’d do it at night. Because there’s less people, less que’s, less headache and less effort on my part.

Laziness only becomes a problem when you let your lazy tendencies interfere with your life and your priorities.

If laziness is doing exactly that to you, for example – playing video games all day and night, and having your girlfriend bring you food and water because you’re too lazy to do it yourself… (Hopefully it hasn’t gotten that bad for you) Here’s how you can motivate yourself to overcome it.

1. Put the repercussions into perspective.

I used to play video games throughout the day and throughout the night. Almost everyday. Sometimes everyday. Sometimes a few days a week.

Sometimes I’d wake up at 12-2PM in the afternoon. On rare occasions it was 4PM. On a lot of occasions I’d go bed at 3-5AM after gaming so much playing Halo, etc.

When It became a habit I had no job at the time. I was looking, but I obviously wasn’t putting in enough work as you can probably tell.

I abused my time playing games, after all. Which in business talk, has a poor ROI over the long term.

Imagine how many books I could have read, how much money I could have made, or many important skills I could have developed in that time?

So what did I do about it? Eventually the repercussions were put into perspective. Not by choice either. Here’s what those repercussions looked like.

1. If I keep this up for the next 10 years, I’ll be in my 30’s and 40’s, with no life, no prospects, no career, followed by a miserable future.

1. If I keep this up how do I expect to live out my dreams, my goals, and what’s important to me?

1. If I keep this up, will I be happy with where my life has taken me 10-20 years from now?

1. Will my future be something to look forward to? Will it be exciting?

1. Will I feel better about myself and how I’m spending my time?

I’m 26 today. For the past 3+ years I’ve been working on myself harder than I ever have in my life. And I haven’t bought a video game ever since.

My priorities and my future are too important for that procrastinating BS. I’ve changed as much as a cocoon changes after morphing into a butterfly.

What about you though? Whatever your situation is in regards to sheer laziness, write out a list of the repercussions of your actions. And put a time line on it. 5 years. 10 years. 20-30 years from now.

How does your life look that far into the future if you continue to do what you’re doing today? If you continue to waste your time on foolishness?

Will your future self be happy with the life he or she has created a decade or so from now?

You already know the answer. And If that’s not motivating enough, I have another solution for you.

2. Commit to your purpose.

I know, I know. It probably sounds corny and is an overused word. But when I say purpose I’m not talking about the “find your life’s purpose, you’ll know it when you see it” BS. It’s a lot simpler than that.

At some point along my journey I realized what was important to me, what mattered, what I care about, what I want my life to look like 100%, and what my reasons were.

And that’s really all it takes to go from being lazy one day, and being so driven the next day that you can’t believe you were ever lazy in the first place.

Ask yourself:

1. What is it I want out of my life?

1. What is it I care about doing?

1. What’s important to me?

1. Who am I doing this for?

1. Why am I doing it?

1. Who benefits other than myself?

1. What are my reasons?

1. What do I want my life to look like?

1. What fulfils me?

1. What is it I want to accomplish?

And then write down ALL your answers. Be as detailed as possible. Make it clear. Read over it, and then get to work.

The reason this is a great solution to solving your problems with laziness and procrastination, is because it matters. It’s compelling. It pulls on your heart strings. And it means a LOT to you.

Yes It will take practice and commitment to completely rid yourself of the habit, but these two solutions I’ve laid out will be enough to get you started.

And along your journey if you do ever come to a point where you’re procrastinating, or wanting to be lazy, simply ask these questions again.

Look at your questions again. Look over your answers. Then your focus will switch to what’s important to you. And your actions will speak for itself.

Took something from this? Show your appreciation by sharing it on your social networks. Thanks a lot.

—-

Theo Ellis is a straightforward blogger, sharing his stories and insights in the realms of personal development and self confidence. Connect with Theo on his blog – Just Be Real.

The post How To Motivate Yourself To Overcome Total Laziness appeared first on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement.

http://ift.tt/1QRGQI3

You may have been hurt, broken, rejected or even ridiculed. You may be battling with low self esteem and it feels like you are not worth more than they mockingly say you are. They said you are sick, you suddenly feel sick. Sick of your financial situation, your state of health, body size or appearance and you’re badly in need of total self-healing.

Yes, you can heal yourself of so many things; your body has been doing that since you were a baby. Remember when you had bruises and cuts?  How many are still visible on you? That’s your body self-healing.

Beyond visible wounds, you can heal yourself from anxiety, emotional trauma, heartbreak, even financial crisis. You may have tried out several tips and ideas but none is making you feel any better.

What is it you are not getting right?

Self love. You attract as much love as you show to yourself. Sometimes, what we think we have lost is simply an invisible seed within us. Just like the pain you may be going through, the strength and willingness to heal is rooted inside of you. You’ve got to love yourself enough to be able to reach for that strength.

All over the world, the people who others pay attention to are those who pay attention to themselves. They love themselves enough to know the things they know; look the way they look and do the things they do. You don’t expect me to love you if you don’t love you.  You’ve got to love yourself enough to know when to say no to that abusive relationship and yes to a better self relationship.

Why does this matter to your total self-healing?

Loving yourself will help you pay attention to the signals from inside you. Your body will not speak to you if you don’t love it. It can’t tell you what it needs to heal. And it is always right but most times we don’t pay attention.

Every part of your body works in harmony, not loving yourself can cause disunity inside you and every organ begins to act independently. That’s when the kidney begins to fail or cancer slips in and it seems like your whole body is unresponsive.

Total self-healing is possible. You have the potential for it but you may never actualise that potential if you do not love yourself enough. Ignore the brokenness you feel, the pain and anguish can all begin to go away if you start loving yourself all over again.

Some call it survival instinct but it is simply self-love. It can push you to distinguish yourself. It is the driving force inside of you that has kept you thus far even though the world around you is screaming negativity.

How to Love Yourself More

Let your love for self stick with you through all the bad experiences, toxic relationships and illnesses until you overlook them. When you start loving yourself and putting your happiness at the forefront, your life will begin to bloom.

Do not let that situation put you down any further; you have power within yourself to heal and flourish in life.

Pay attention to the things and people that make you happy.  The world is tending to infinity on the negative side, choose to love yourself a little more, and some more because you need all the love you can muster for total self-healing.

Remember, no one can help you love yourself not even your lover. Besides you need the healing not them. You are self-love away from achieving total self-healing; don’t waste it.

Do you love yourself?

Diena Diallo is an author and the founder of Diena Simply Natural. As a hair stylist and health coach, she helps women looking for change to feel beautiful about themselves, so they can live confidently through life and stay healthy enough to achieve their dreams. You can grab a copy of her self-help book, The Invisible Seed, where she shares her journey from depression to total self-healing.

The post Why Loving Yourself Is The First Step To Total Self-Healing appeared first on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement.

http://ift.tt/22cpg5k

You have a passion (or two) burning in your belly.

You want to live a passion-filled life offering the best of yourself to others.

Your passion keeps you up at night, occupies your thoughts, fills your journal with fabulous visions.

But you’re not moving.

You hit a road block.

In short, you’re stuck.

Maybe you’re stuck in analysis paralysis, where you’re overthinking every step instead of taking action.

Or you’re burned out. If you have a full-time job or family responsibilities and you pursue your passion on the side in your spare time, you might be out of band width.

Maybe you’re not moving because you’re not sure what you want. And it’s hard for you to start until that aha moment hits you and gets you moving.

If this is you, I’m going to tell you something you may not want to hear…

You might be seeing the world through rose-colored glasses.

Before you stop reading, allow me to explain.

If you’re like me, you probably read a lot of self-improvement blogs. But one thing I’ve noticed is that they can be overly positive.

The reason they’re overly positive is because people read them to get a boost and feel inspired. And that often why I read them. I’m a glass is half-full kinda gal. But if you’re looking at your situation in an overly cheery way, you may be missing the truth.

The truth is sometimes hard to look at. Why are you stuck? What’s the real reason? Are there feelings you’re trying to avoid? Are you busying yourself with trivial work so you don’t have to face them? Are you pursuing the wrong dream and you’re afraid to admit that to yourself?

These are tough questions. But they’re critical for you to get move again on your path to pursuing your passion and creating a passion-filled life for yourself.

The following are 5 reasons why you may be stuck and what you can do to free yourself:

1. You’re burned out.

This is a simple one. You pursue your passion day and night, you have a day job, you have bambinos, you have a lot on your plate, and well, you’re exhausted. Maybe you’re always in front of your computer without any balance in your life.

Stand up and get outside. Go for a walk, go for a swim, get away from your passion for a while. Do something fun that makes you laugh and fills you with energy, or take a nap. Give yourself a break to re-energize.

2. You’ve suffered a Lack & Attach Attack

You’re working hard, but results aren’t coming in. The passion pursuit business is tough. It’s taking all of your blood, sweat, and tears just to break even. You wake up in the morning thinking about all the things you lack, “Why don’t I have more clients, subscribers, followers, resources, creativity, drive, etc, etc?”

You’re also attached to the outcomes you’re hoping to achieve. Instead of using your goals as motivation, you’re attached to achieving them, thus not allowing the best of you to come through.

To recover from a Lack & Attach Attack, spend some time each day thinking about or writing down all the things you do have. A gratitude journal works great for this (you may have heard this advice to start a gratitude journal 100 times before, but have you done it?). Remember to spend a bit of time considering all the things you do have with regards to your passion pursuit.

3. You’re ignoring signs from your body

Your body is a sophisticated machine that is constantly giving you raw, honest feedback regarding what it likes and doesn’t. But very often, we neglect to listen to the messages being sent to us by our body because we’re distracted by our mind and the voices in our head telling us that we’re not good enough or that we’ll reach our dreams.

For every action you contemplate taking, your body will react with a physical sensation. Every body reacts differently, but very often your body will feel light, tingly, or free if you’re going in the right direction, and tense, heavy, or tight if you’re going in the wrong.

So check in to see what you’re body is saying. It will always give you honest, no frills feedback. If an action you’re thinking about taking feels light, free, and expansive, then don’t hesitate, hold back, or wait for a better moment, take it.

4. You’re delaying your happiness

You have a vision of what you want your life to look like, but it’s not yet here. So you’re frustrated and feeling like giving up. Consequently, you’re not moving.

You don’t need your goals to be achieved to live a happy life. You can start living the life of your dreams, today, right now. You do this by identifying the core values that are most important to you and the feelings you want to experience on your journey and start living by the values and feelings right now.

Values are what you want to do, and feelings are the emotions you want to experience. Thus, if creativity is a value that is important to you, and inspiration is a feeling you want to experience, then start creating something today that is inspiring to you (first and foremost) and the ideal people you want to reach.

In addition, if going to a yoga class or hitting a museum is a creative act for you that brings forth feelings of inspiration, add more of those activities into your routine.

5. You aren’t taking responsibility for your passion

When you’re pursuing your passion and hit a road block, it’s great to blame others. This is what I hear most from my clients:

“My partner just isn’t supporting me, so I feeling as though I can’t continue.”

“The market is too saturated, and it’s too difficult to attract new clients.”

“If only I had more time, I’d really be able to go after my dreams.”

I’m here to be honest with you, it’s all poppycock. When you think these thoughts, you’re playing the role of the victim. When you play the victim you’re ceding all of your power over to the victim police. Don’t do it.

You may truly and honestly have a partner who doesn’t support your vision, but that’s OK. Have daily or weekly conversations with him or her about how much these means to you and fill them in on your progress and struggles. If they still aren’t 100% on board, that’s OK. They don’t need to be.

You keep doing you’re thing. Stay true to your vision, your core values, the emotions you want to experience, and your power to make it happen.

6. The action steps you want to take are too bad

If your dream is to start a non-profit that makes sure every person in the world is literate, then that’s a big, awesome goal. It’s perfect. Think and dream big. It’s the way to keep you inspired and motivated. It means something to you and the world.

But when you’re considering how to make this dream a reality, don’t stay with the actions step of, “Convince Congress this is a good idea.” Start with the action step of, “10 minutes of research on illiteracy around the world.” Make your actions bite-sized, tiny, so easy they’d be silly not to do them.

If you’re not sure if your action item is too big or not, then check in with the body. If the body is feel expansive, then execute. If the body is feeling constricted, then cut your action in half.

To quote Amelia Earheart, “The only way to do is just to do it.”

And the best way to do it is to  bite-sized actions that feel good in the body, are in line with your core values, and bring about the feelings you want to experience on your journey.

By doing this, your days of feeling stuck will be a thing of the past.

For additional support to get you unstuck, click here to sign up for my free 10-Day Bold Action Challenge, which is designed to help you get moving again.

What do you most feel stuck? I’d love to know. Post a comment below.

Allyson Scammell is a Life and Career Coach who helps purpose-driven professionals and busy people to discover and pursue the things they’re most passionate about. She loves to take inspired action and believes there’s always enough time in the day to pursue your passions. Learn more at shantipax.com, and connect on Facebook or Twitter.

The post Feeling stuck? 5 Ways to Take Inspired Action in Pursuit of Your Passion appeared first on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement.

http://ift.tt/1Un2rZR