You’re reading 6 Unusual Tips to Skyrocket Your Self-Esteem, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Has it happened to you?

You say sorry too often when sorry isn’t needed.

At a restaurant when the waiter gets your order wrong. At the mall when someone bumps into you. At work when someone misses your meeting, and it feels like your fault because you didn’t remind them.

Or maybe you struggle to accept compliments. Instead of saying thanks, you argue against the compliment. You downplay it. You attribute it to some coincidence.

The above, described my life. I had a low self-image, lack of confidence, courage or whatever you want to call it.

Maybe you’re in the same boat I was. Always thinking if only I could alter my self-image. If only I could boost my confidence. If only I could be the person I’ve always wanted to be.

But what if I told you, you could?

Dr. Maxwell Maltz said it best: “Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand-break on.”

The definition of self-esteem is your faith in someone or something. Maybe you’re overweight and lost faith in your body. Maybe you feel you’ve failed your parents. Maybe you feel you have failed yourself.

If so, this post might be of help.

Here are a few tricks that have helped me, and may help you too.

1. What If

If you experience self-doubt during indecision, ask yourself: “How would I act in this situation if I was overflowing with confidence?” Then, do it that way!

Your comfort zone is a dangerous place to be. If you want to grow, get out of it.

2. Here’s Why Affirmations Don’t Work

I know what you’re thinking. Not this again! But hear me out. Here’s the catch that most people miss.

You have to say your affirmations with feeling. What’s the difference between an owner’s manual and a best-selling novel? Emotion. Your subconscious mind doesn’t understand words, but it does emotion.

Repeat the following to yourself with as much enthusiasm as possible: Everyday, in every way, I’m getting bolder, more confident, and self-assured. At first, you won’t believe yourself, but if you tell your subconscious mind something long enough, after a while it’ll believe it.

3. Knowing vs Doing

It’s easy to fall into the trap of saying: “Meh, I already know this.” Instead as yourself: “Am I applying this advice to my life?”

Also, ask yourself if this advice can improve your life. If it can, it would be wise to test this new idea in your life by applying it.

4. Reverse Engineering

If you haven’t watched Amy Cuddy’s Ted talk, you’re in for a treat.

Self-assured people have a confident body posture. But Cuddy explains the reverse can also apply. If you’re feeling down, strike a power pose for 2 minutes to increase confidence. A power pose is any position that makes your body bigger and more open.

My favorite is feet on the desk with my hands clasped behind my head.

5. Outsource

I’ll be honest with you. Building confidence is possible, but it does take time. You won’t gain it overnight.

Until you reach your goal have someone be your confidence. Whoever inspires you. It might be Tony Robbins, Oprah, or whoever.

Reading or listening to their stories can be empowering. You learn about their sheer determination and persistence that got them where they are today.

6. Act Like a Nightclub Bouncer

Negative thoughts spread like weeds. As soon as one enters, they spread. You should be like a nightclub bouncer who banishes every negative thought that tries to enter your club of happiness.

Sometimes you feel powerless, but don’t let self-doubt take your power. You have the power to choose more positive thoughts.

Is it easy? Nope! But it becomes easier with practice. Driving also wasn’t easy. But the more you practiced, the better you got.

And it’s OK if you’re scared. Courage is being scared and still moving forward. As with self-esteem, you can also learn to be courageous.

You are not your beliefs. Someone else put them there. If someone put them there it means someone can remove them.

Don’t tell yourself the lie that you can’t do it. Because that’s all it is. A lie. People with way fewer resources than you have achieved more. Not because they got lucky, but because they wanted it.

The question is, do you want it bad enough? Do you want to be confident?

Instead of going through life with your handbrake on, rather rip it out. When (not if) your confidence skyrockets you’ll be in the fast lane. No need for slowing down or parking.

Let’s stop settling. Let’s stop trying to please other people, and rather please ourselves. To hell with what anyone thinks. If you’re happy, they should be happy for you.

Because isn’t being happy the purpose of life? It sure is for me. So let’s change that.

I’m game.

Are you?

You’ve read 6 Unusual Tips to Skyrocket Your Self-Esteem, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading How to Unleash Total Confidence From Inside of You, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

So you want to feel confidence that’s running through every vein? The type of confidence that brings out the absolute best in you? That inner voice that makes heads turn, the looks that make people shut up, or the suggestion that makes people nod. You want the kind of confidence that when you walk into a room and own it.

There is no such thing as confidence potion or self-esteem vitamin, however.

The good news is that self-confidence can be drawn from within. Actually, that’s what should happen – if the confidence is real. It is not something that you necessarily have to get or buy from someone. You can draw it from your own stock inside you.

Let me share with you how you can use these reserves that are inside of you and see what we can do to poke them out to get that oozing confidence!

1. Recall those small successes that bring out positive emotions

Do you remember that day when you helped your boss recover an unsaved file; when you lost your way but eventually found your destination by keeping your focus; or when you placed in the top 5 in your exams unexpectedly? These were the wow-moments when you felt great and confident about yourself. Those were the days when you were willing to take the lead, no matter how it may sound insignificant or trivial, to make an impact in your life or of another.

Being confident is not a one-time package that you can get in one box and have it forever. You have to work for it. You have to discover bits and pieces of it in the things you do, the events in your life or even in your daily routine.

Hence, make it a daily exercise to draw those positive energies from within by spending quiet moments of reflection remembering those moments when you had those little or even big successes. Use them to face your challenges. It will surely make wonders!

2. Remove the negativity in your mind and in your life

In our lifetime, we are full of negativity- those we acquired from our childhood while we were growing up, those people who tried to knock down our self-worth with verbal abuse, those unfortunate events that we did not have control of but continue to haunt us. The examples would be endless if I would take the time to list them one by one.

Some of these still hound us on a daily or regular basis. They keep coming back precisely on those moments when we face the challenges that question our self-confidence and capability. There is nothing wrong with looking back for once but we have to do so quickly just to draw learning from them. Acknowledging the past is the first step.

Furthermore, while you can spend time for reflection on the good things, you can also spend part of that time to detoxify your inner self. Find out what good we can take from those unpleasant experiences and move on. Throw them away, try to forget them and if you can’t, seek appropriate help.

3. Reflect and visualize the confident you

Author Jack Canfield encourages visualization to help fast-track the achievement of those goals or dreams. He says it activates your creative subconscious and programs your brain to be more aware of your environment.

The practice of visualization was never a formal exercise that even many successful people do. A large number of them probably did so unconsciously in face of adversity or need to survive. They tried to learn and pickup from what they see from other successful people and feed their minds that someday they will get there if they work on their goals.

Use visualization to project your self-confidence. Who do you see yourself in the next five years? Like a rich educated gentleman who speaks and walks confidently? Like a team leader who can command respect from his members? Like a community leader who can courageously beat the odds to stand for what he believes in?

You can use your imagination to see yourself in the position of these admired persons. If you have to spend a time in your routine and meditate to imagine your goals; if you have to cut down images that represent your confident self and put them on a board; if you have to write descriptive words and record them in a diary for you to remember them—do so. It will help you realize your goals faster!

The truth about oozing confidence and what you can do about it

So you really want that powerful confidence to come out of you? Think again. There is no magic pill to give you that great confidence.

Oozing confidence is about drawing from your experience those winning moments and using them to face new challenges. It is about making yourself visible and truly relevant to your workplace, family and community. It is not about the noise but the impact you make in the place where you live.

It’s about time you make a choice. I therefore challenge you to make one little step to this journey – to join my community and support group. Let’s work on this together and see how far you can go!

—–
Rob Leonardo is the creator of successful email series turned into a book, Confidence Upgrade. He advocates building self-confidence around an alternative mantra “be bold assertive and happy.” He is giving away digital copies of his book next month to the first 100 new subscribers to his support community. Get access HERE.

photo credits: Tim Inconnu

You’ve read How to Unleash Total Confidence From Inside of You, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

http://ift.tt/2k1BiBr

You’re reading How to Unleash Total Confidence From Inside of You, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

So you want to feel confidence that’s running through every vein? The type of confidence that brings out the absolute best in you? That inner voice that makes heads turn, the looks that make people shut up, or the suggestion that makes people nod. You want the kind of confidence that when you walk into a room and own it.

There is no such thing as confidence potion or self-esteem vitamin, however.

The good news is that self-confidence can be drawn from within. Actually, that’s what should happen – if the confidence is real. It is not something that you necessarily have to get or buy from someone. You can draw it from your own stock inside you.

Let me share with you how you can use these reserves that are inside of you and see what we can do to poke them out to get that oozing confidence!

1. Recall those small successes that bring out positive emotions

Do you remember that day when you helped your boss recover an unsaved file; when you lost your way but eventually found your destination by keeping your focus; or when you placed in the top 5 in your exams unexpectedly? These were the wow-moments when you felt great and confident about yourself. Those were the days when you were willing to take the lead, no matter how it may sound insignificant or trivial, to make an impact in your life or of another.

Being confident is not a one-time package that you can get in one box and have it forever. You have to work for it. You have to discover bits and pieces of it in the things you do, the events in your life or even in your daily routine.

Hence, make it a daily exercise to draw those positive energies from within by spending quiet moments of reflection remembering those moments when you had those little or even big successes. Use them to face your challenges. It will surely make wonders!

2. Remove the negativity in your mind and in your life

In our lifetime, we are full of negativity- those we acquired from our childhood while we were growing up, those people who tried to knock down our self-worth with verbal abuse, those unfortunate events that we did not have control of but continue to haunt us. The examples would be endless if I would take the time to list them one by one.

Some of these still hound us on a daily or regular basis. They keep coming back precisely on those moments when we face the challenges that question our self-confidence and capability. There is nothing wrong with looking back for once but we have to do so quickly just to draw learning from them. Acknowledging the past is the first step.

Furthermore, while you can spend time for reflection on the good things, you can also spend part of that time to detoxify your inner self. Find out what good we can take from those unpleasant experiences and move on. Throw them away, try to forget them and if you can’t, seek appropriate help.

3. Reflect and visualize the confident you

Author Jack Canfield encourages visualization to help fast-track the achievement of those goals or dreams. He says it activates your creative subconscious and programs your brain to be more aware of your environment.

The practice of visualization was never a formal exercise that even many successful people do. A large number of them probably did so unconsciously in face of adversity or need to survive. They tried to learn and pickup from what they see from other successful people and feed their minds that someday they will get there if they work on their goals.

Use visualization to project your self-confidence. Who do you see yourself in the next five years? Like a rich educated gentleman who speaks and walks confidently? Like a team leader who can command respect from his members? Like a community leader who can courageously beat the odds to stand for what he believes in?

You can use your imagination to see yourself in the position of these admired persons. If you have to spend a time in your routine and meditate to imagine your goals; if you have to cut down images that represent your confident self and put them on a board; if you have to write descriptive words and record them in a diary for you to remember them—do so. It will help you realize your goals faster!

The truth about oozing confidence and what you can do about it

So you really want that powerful confidence to come out of you? Think again. There is no magic pill to give you that great confidence.

Oozing confidence is about drawing from your experience those winning moments and using them to face new challenges. It is about making yourself visible and truly relevant to your workplace, family and community. It is not about the noise but the impact you make in the place where you live.

It’s about time you make a choice. I therefore challenge you to make one little step to this journey – to join my community and support group. Let’s work on this together and see how far you can go!

—–
Rob Leonardo is the creator of successful email series turned into a book, Confidence Upgrade. He advocates building self-confidence around an alternative mantra “be bold assertive and happy.” He is giving away digital copies of his book next month to the first 100 new subscribers to his support community. Get access HERE.

photo credits: Tim Inconnu

You’ve read How to Unleash Total Confidence From Inside of You, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

http://ift.tt/2k1BiBr

You’re reading The 5 Best Podcasts on Ethics, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

The word Ethics is derived from the Greek word for character (ethos) and the Latin word for customs (mores). It is a word to describe how individuals interact with each other. Ethics is about what standards and virtues we uphold in our societies, from rights to justice. The origin of our beliefs have a lot to do with what we were taught when we were younger or what environment we use to justify that principle. It is necessary to examine one’s own values to make sure they are reasonable. A society’s ethical standards must be bolstered by consistent reason. Here is a list of 5 podcasts that consider the nature of ethics:

1. The notion of moral responsibility can be impossible to find in an organization which is in and of itself, emotionless, however the assembly of people within that group can be morally and socially responsible if held accountable. This podcast is heavily complex to listen to, but makes a strong case for business ethics and corporate social responsibility.

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2. This is an interesting podcast series where we hear many different views on ethics within various professions. The voices we hear are primarily those of people in the 20’s and 30’s discussing everything from the ethics of archeology to the ethical issues surrounding athletic trainers. The variety of these podcasts presents a perspective that goes beyond social responsibility, it deconstructs the big picture so we can understand how ethics plays an important role in our everyday lives.

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3. This podcast tackles the issue of neuro-pharmacology (smart drugs and substances) taken by healthy people to enhance their performance, however, the assumption with this is that we know what is considered an improvement in the species. But a much greater concern is what kind of a society are we if we believe, for example, working excessively just because we can (with cognitive enhancement) is the right way to live. The serious ethical issue is that we don’t know the long term effects of these drugs, especially when children are given cognitive drugs.

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4. Meta ethics tries to understand what it means for something to be right or wrong. Is it an opinion or is it fact independent of your opinion? Ethics begins with an assumption of what is right or wrong and meta ethics discovers whether they are right or wrong. It is difficult to verify moral claims however, if you perceive that if morality of an act is judged by its consequences, then that can be a measure of verification. Can one be objective about morality? This podcast is incredibly interesting in discussing these ideas.

http://ift.tt/2km4j7z

5. This podcast examines the myth of ‘patient zero’, when one man was mistakenly blamed as the originator of HIV in North America. In storytelling, (and in this case, a media story) we always try to get to the bigger truths by taking liberties with smaller truths. There seems to be a culture that wants to find blame when we have an epidemic, so there is a search for a place of origin. This podcast considers the ethics surrounding our need to identify its source.

http://ift.tt/2iYCPbI

Ethics is one of the most important values one can hold, as from an early age we are told what is ‘fair’, and what ‘is not fair.’ To answer these questions or to teach these values to our future generations or even to ourselves, requires one to have a constant dialogue with others and attune ourselves to what is truly ethical in terms of its benefits for society as a whole.

Do you read a great blog about ethics that’s not on the list? Leave a comment on FB!

Larissa Gomes is a breast cancer survivor and single mom to her spirited baby boy! Originally from Toronto turned Angeleno, she has worked in roles from writer, actor and producer for well over a decade. In that time, she’s developed concepts, film and television screenplays, short stories, along with freelance articles, blogging and editing work.

 

You’ve read The 5 Best Podcasts on Ethics, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading How to Use Momentum to Your Advantage Every Day, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

If you’re not using momentum to your advantage, you may find yourself getting lost in a tangle day after day.

But by starting your day with activities that include reading, meditating, working out, and practicing gratitude – you will feel much more positive in the morning. By taking care of the little starts throughout your day, you’ll have a more rewarding day (more on this soon). You’ll move up the ladder of positivity quicker instead of being stuck in the middle.

This principle applies to every part of our lives.

Yet how often do we ignore this and opt for the easy road straight away? The croissant and coffee with the television on in the morning. The lack of greeting our neighbor. The rush to work because we’re late. And so, the day begins without an optimal mindset.

And then, we might be likelier to start eating poorly, snap at someone, or get frustrated with ourselves.

Not starting things off well, isn’t due to a character flaw we have; it’s simply human nature to favor taking the easy path. It’s easier to just roll into bed. It’s easier to unlock your phone first thing in the morning and check your email. It’s easier to be dismissive. But we can learn to opt to take the high road and train ourselves to start everything we do on the right note.

“Take the high road, there’s a lot less traffic up there.” Phillip C.Mcgraw

Albert Einstein once said that compound interest in life is the most powerful force in the universe. And I think this principle also applies to our daily lives. Everything we do is done once at a time. But the energy we bring to the next thing contains a residual power.

Ever notice how you feel after you’ve done everything that was on your plate? It’s a phenomenal state to be in, and everything that you do after, feels easier. That’s the power of momentum, and that’s what we should aim to cultivate more of in our lives.

Here are some examples to demonstrate this principle:

• If you start your workout well, you’ll be likelier to have a great workout
• If you make a good first impression on a client, you’ll be likelier to seal the deal
• If you smile at your neighbor and start things off on a pleasant note, you’ll be likelier to have a better conversation
• If you get in a good mood as quickly as possible after waking up, you’ll be likelier to feel good throughout the rest of the day
• If you get to work on time, you’ll feel more productive

With that in mind, we can become more aware of our little “starts”. That’s where the potential of anything great truly lies. Whether it’s at work, when we start a conversation with someone, or right when we wake up.

If all we do is concentrate on starting well, we can worry about the rest a little less. That’s because momentum will take care of the middle and the end, we just need to push ourselves along in the right direction first. When rockets make their launch into space, 80% of the fuel is used for take-off. The last 20% is just used to maintain the momentum of the journey.

The same principle also holds true in our lives.

If you’re interested in learning more about mastering your habits, get my free guide. Here’s what you’ll learn:

• First, you’ll find out how to split up your day into four chunks, so that you’ll worry less about external influences.
• Second, you’ll discover how to consistently celebrate your small wins, so that you feel more creative and enthusiastic each day.
• Third, I’ll show you the small productivity hacks that will take your output to the next level.

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About the Author: Samy Felice is a writer who is passionate about unique ideas related to living a meaningful life. His Free Guide explores ways people can make success easier.

You’ve read How to Use Momentum to Your Advantage Every Day, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading 3 Steps to Enlightenment: The Path of Surrender, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Have you ever dreamed about going off to an ashram in India, hoping to get your life clearly sorted out once and for all, as Elizabeth Gilbert did in Eat, Pray, Love? Have you secretly dreamed that one day you will land in some sacred place and feel miraculously in tune and connected, such that all of your life’s troubles disappear?

The illusion that we can fix our life by abandoning it is admittedly very tempting, and many of us try to escape our lives in search of something better. We are often fooled into thinking we can find ourselves and find peace if only we meditate enough, go on retreats, and magically make ourselves over to have all new and healthier habits. This is not to dismiss the value of taking a short break to recuperate and gather yourself. Indeed, such changes can be immensely helpful in realigning and reinvigorating the soul. However, many of us unconsciously use these spiritual events, tools, and resources in the external world in order to escape pain, to escape the profound disconnection we suffer within.

What happens is this: We want to make a change, yet we remove ourselves from the place where we would like to actually manifest that change, and we go somewhere else—often a new and strange place—and reap only the short-lived benefits of isolated change. “It was a relaxing trip. Life feels different now,” we might think, not fully realizing that when we go back to the real places we live, we go back to the cluttered rooms, the broken marriage, and the daunting financial responsibilities.

The reality you live and breathe now is your spiritual path. Where you are right now, in the midst of your troubles and your suffering or your joy and your happiness, is the actual path. When you acknowledge that spirituality happens in every moment, you make a leap of faith. Any time you embody or act from love, any time you live from a selfless place because your inner self is already full, you bring yourself closer to the Divine. Any time you look at someone with a compassionate heart and do your best to honor that person, a piece of yourself is restored, and you feel aligned and connected.

Everything we see in this universe is a reflection of two qualities: love and truth. From there, we make our own contributions, further reflecting these two qualities in our life and the lives of others. Positive change in your life starts with acknowledging the truth, then moving into finding solutions and taking informed, loving action. No solution is complete unless we are in tune with ourselves and find our place in the circle of prayer and surrender to Divine.

What does it mean to surrender? In our limited capacity to control the outcomes of our lives, we forget that everything in the universe—the planets, stars, trees, and animals—is in a state of surrender. Surrender is about knowing when to “do”—when to exert our influence—and when to simply “be.” When we decide to embrace surrender, we are asked to become more and more discerning of what is within our control and what is not.

Alignment with the Divine is the delicate combined state of surrender and prayer. In alignment, you move and act the same way the rest of God’s creations do, secure in your awareness of the higher power that guides you. At the same time, you are in a constant state of prayer, of personal communication with the Divine, to ask for what you need and express your gratitude and praise.

The gift of free will is an honorable one, given to us by the Divine. Surrender is the art of operating in a governed universe by cultivating an intimate relationship with the Divine. You step into a sacred circle that rotates with input both from you and from the Divine. In that circle, prayer is your input. At the same time, you allow guidance and input from the Divine by wholeheartedly surrendering your actions and listening in. In this way, the Divine shapes your life with wisdom and grace. When you take action and then let go, you enter into a space of harmonious creation. You experience the light and support of the Divine.

Your life is your sacred ashram. It is up to you to make your life the most amazing journey. No one will live your life for you, and no one will create peace of mind except you. You will not find the answers any place other than where you are. So open your eyes. Begin to look at your everyday life differently, to allow it to have the light and the sacredness it is supposed to have.
Here are simple ways to practice surrender.

Surrender Your Day

When you wake up, without stating any desires or plans, release the day and its events to Divine guidance, and then go about your day. You will notice that when you let go, there is no need to force anything. Bring your heart on board and be open.

Surrender Your Health

When you have a chronic symptom or pain, try this prayer: “Dear God, I now let go of the need to fix myself. I allow the light of your truth to enter my body and restore me fully. My body knows how to heal itself. I now allow it to awaken to the truth of your creation. I am ready and willing to learn and heal. Thank you.”

Surrender Your Time

The notions of past, present, and future enable us to take responsibility and make things happen, but when we hold on to them too tightly, we destroy our own peace of mind. To break free of this trap, set an intention, and then allow the Divine plan – the “how” – to unfold. Try the following prayer as you wake up in the morning: “Dear God, I am willing to let go of my worries about time and allow your guidance to take over instead. I am open and receptive to your plans to bring me what is best. Thank you.”
When we shift our perspective, our outlook changes for the better. That’s the power of self that we all carry. By living fully and being mindful in every moment, we gather our strength and become more aligned. Our spiritual journey is fully realized in our intimate relationship with the Divine. It is when we surrender that magic enters our mundane life.

ABOUT OUR WRITER
Eiman Al Zaabi is a personal transformation coach, spiritual teacher, and author of The Art of Surrender: A Practical Guide to Enlightened Happiness and Well-Being. Outside of her coaching practice, Eiman works at New York University, Abu Dhabi campus, and lives in the United Arab Emirates with her husband and children. Sign up for her coaching sessions and newsletter at eimanalzaabi.com.

You’ve read 3 Steps to Enlightenment: The Path of Surrender, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading 3 Unique Things That Successful People Do Differently, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Are you already wavering on your New Year’s resolutions? It’s okay, you’re not alone. If you want 2017 to be the year that they stick, you are going to need some proven routines to keep you going. Where better to look than at the habits of highly successful people?

We all know the typical things that successful people do differently – wake up early, set goals, network – but what does the next level of successful behavior look like? No matter whether your passion is baking or real estate, everyone has something at which they strive to be successful. While there is no one defined behaviour for successful people, anyone who has spent extensive amounts of time reading interviews of and articles by successful people can agree that there are similar attitudes and behaviors that they possess. There are universal traits and practices that are common to all successful people regardless of their background and field of influence. If you want to create a culture of success in your life, here are the most common and effective habits of successful people to get you started. 

They set daily goals.

Most successful people attest to the fact that they do not simply wake up to an agenda filled with random activities. Instead, most successful people come up with large, long-term goals. American Express CEO Kenneth Chenault, for example, states that “at the beginning of each year, I set the key priorities and key objectives”.[1] These priorities and objectives are part of a larger, long-term vision, and are easily achievable when broken down into smaller pieces. Every day, then, successful people take the initiative to set themselves small, daily goals that contribute to the priorities, objectives, and long-term vision. They then plan their day ahead of time to ensure that they have activities and appointments planned that address each of their goals.

They take care of themselves first.

The most valuable resource you have is yourself. Successful people, especially those in the service industry, understand that they need to continually work on their personal brand and physical appearance. They also understand that their social life is as important as their finances and, as such, set aside enough time for leisure activities with friends and family. They know when to stop working. They also know that their bodies need good food, hydration, rest and sleep. On top of physical maintenance, they look out for experiences and relationships that will enhance their lives. They read widely from good authors and engage in positive conversations. They understand that you cannot change the world if you have not taken care of yourself first.

The concept of remembering to attend to one’s own needs is captured by the term self-care. It was coined by and remains a pillar of the work that mental health professionals do every day. There are countless resources that uphold the importance of the practice as well as provide resources in its pursuit. If you are unsure of where to start, I recommend an interactive self-care flowchart by Jace Harr entitled, “You feel Like Shit: An Interactive Self-Care Guide”. It walks the user through his or her needs, beginning with the most basic. As the landing page asserts, it is designed “for people who struggle with self-care, executive dysfunction, and/or who have trouble reading internal signals”.[2] It is a simple, straightforward, and effective first step at attending to yourself when you are not feeling your best.

They meditate.

This may seem trivial to many people, especially given the number of things vying for our attention these days. However, successful people always make time to meditate. What they do during this quiet time varies by personal preference and time of day. If it is the end of a busy day, they might take time to reflect on their goals as well as the day that has passed: their achievements and failures, the status of their personal relationships and their spirituality. The successful people who do this understand that when so much is going on that you do not have time to reflect, it is easy to miss out on the lessons. Since they are continually seeking ways to improve themselves, they take time to reflect on their strengths and areas for growth. If they are feeling particularly drained or negative, they might use the quiet time for positive self-talk. Other times, if they are feeling particularly stressed or overworked, they might choose to focus on their breath and enjoy ten minutes of not thinking at all.

If you are interested in starting a practice but unsure of where to begin, there are many support out there for you, beginning with the mogul Oprah Winfrey. She is a huge proponent of meditation, stating that it has shifted her life in ways that she never imagined. She is such a firm believer in the practice that she has instituted period of “Quiet Time” twice a day in her network offices.[3] For those who do not work for Oprah, she has collaborated with spiritual guide Deepak Chopra to create a number of free 21-day guided meditations. There are others with free meditations available, including Tara Brach. If you prefer music or silence, there are free apps available that help you to time and keep track of your meditation sessions.

 

While there is no script that successful people follow, there are traits that are common amongst them. If you are seeking practices that will give you a boost in your productivity and overall success in life, consider the importance of goal setting, self-care, and meditation. Make each of these practices a pattern of behaviour and you will surely be on the road to success.

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Wheeler del Torro (http://ift.tt/LfD2Mm) is a nutritional anthropologist and author. His most recent book, Boss Up!, provides a step-by-step guide to creating a powerful executive presence in order to be perceived as a leader and reap the benefits that go along with it. When he is not researching, lecturing, or hosting popups, Wheeler is out setting the next culinary trend.

 

[1] Bulygo, Zach. (n.d.) “Business lessons from American Express CEO Ken Chenault”. Kissmetrics Blog. Retrieved on 23 December 2016 from http://ift.tt/2jlygow

[2] Jace Herr. http://ift.tt/1h50SQg

[3] Interview with Oprah Winfrey. Facebook Live stream. http://ift.tt/2juHnU8

You’ve read 3 Unique Things That Successful People Do Differently, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading Seven Mantras to Lift Your Love Life, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

If you are feeling disconnected, lonely, frustrated or hopeless about love then perhaps you are in need of a little love boost. Love boosts are little things you can do to activate the love which exists inside of you. Reciting mantras is one of the ways to do this. You see without this activation love can appear absent, dull, hopeless, temporary and in some cases hurtful. This gives the impression that love is a risk. Here is the thing, love never left you left love.

You see doubting love is no different than being uncertain about yourself. Love is present within you and around you every second of the day, even if you cannot feel it. This is because love is a high vibrational frequency of energy. It is energy in motion. The fear, worry or sadness you may be carrying about love is really love which has been suppressed, ignored or resisted in you. I know this may seem crazy, but the fear in you is really an unconscious desire to be connected to love.

Mantras are one way to help you rebuild those love connections. Mantras are sounds, syllables, words and phrases which are repeated over a long period of time (e.g. forty days). They elevate the energy within you and around you. When practiced over time, they literally give you a love (energy) boost, lifting your fearful vibrations by moving energy at a higher frequency closer to love.

Before reciting a mantra, it is important to keep in mind, mantras are not something you do but rather an energy you connect to. As you develop this practice you will naturally strengthen your connection to love. This puts less pressure on your current and potential partners. Rather than have the relationship be the supplier of the love you yearn for, instead you show up ready to share this vibration. Some of the ways the love vibration gets shared is through listening, forgiveness and patience.

To get started, I suggest you select one of the mantras below. Pick the one you are most drawn to. Work with this mantra for forty days, reciting it 10-30 times daily. The mantras must be stated out loud (even if it is a whisper), in a row, preferably in a quiet space. At the end of your practice, pause and receive the energy you are creating (love) by taking a long inhale, and long exhale. Let go of all expectations, reminding yourself this is a tool for boosting the love you already have.

 

1. Now that I am fully and completely connected to love everything I desire is in motion.
2. Let love flow.
3. I am infinitely connected to love.
4. I am generously receiving love now, thank you.
5. Love pulsates through me now.
6. I am love.
7. I am open and ready to receive love.

Sherianna Boyle is the author of six books the most recent being Mantras Made Easy, Choosing Love, The Four Gifts of Anxiety and The Conscious Parenting Guide to Childhood Anxiety. She is an adjunct Psychology Professor, seasoned yoga instructor and Quantum Healing practioner. Her resources can be found at http://ift.tt/1ABx6Ix.

You’ve read Seven Mantras to Lift Your Love Life, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading 7 Things You Should Stop Doing If You Have Anxiety, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Are you someone who’s easily overwhelmed about the most trivial things? Do you feel anxious so much that you lay awake most nights with thoughts that make you stressed? One of the many reasons why anxiety is hard to cure is because most people suffering from it engage in things that make it worse. Listed below are the common issues that usually aggravate anxiety.

1. Keeping Your Anxiety a Secret

It might feel shameful for you to let people know that you’re suffering from anxiety. You may fear that they’d start avoiding you or treat you unfairly because of it. But the one mistake of people suffering from anxiety is being dishonest about it.

You don’t have to tell the world right now, but the closest people you know, or the ones you spend time with every day is a good start. This will help them understand you, and help you overcome your anxiety.

2. Isolating Yourself

“I feel much better alone, I don’t need anyone else”. Anxious people often distance themselves from other people. And this is very unhealthy. Solitude is good once in a while but too much and it can lead to depression. The thing is: familiarity increases anxiety. The more you stay in the “safe zone”, the more you get anxious when new things come your way.

According to Brianna West, founder of Soul Anatomy, “anxiety is being disconnected from the present moment, other people, or yourself. It is the warning sign that we’re too much in the past or the future so much that it affects the choices we make in the present.”

So stop spending too much time alone. Start doing something different, get out of your comfort zone, and start connecting or reconnecting with the people you have in your life.

3. Validating Your Fears

Imagine if you’re the type of person who gets anxious about traveling by airplanes. You’ll worry about your life so much that you’ll look up death rates for plane accidents. Or if you’re scared of dogs, you’ll read stories about cases of people who got killed by their own pet dogs.

Validating fears is commonly done by people who are anxious about their health. They research to validate their symptoms and worry that they may have a rare disease. Unfortunately, this behavior is not helpful, as it causes more anxiety. And the more you get anxious, the more your anxiety becomes harder to cure.

What you should do is realize that fear is normal and that it’s also liberating. We are all designed to feel fear. But to conquer our fear takes time, and it should be done so with love and understanding for yourself.

4. Lying to Yourself

The worst lies are the ones we tell ourselves. People like to cover up truths because it doesn’t sound pretty. Or because it hurts. One of the causes of anxiety is contradiction with ourselves. By lying to yourself, you’re masquerading the truth with lies that hurt other people. Lies that make you create an expectation of yourself that maybe you can’t even achieve. That’s what’s going to make you more anxious. If you want to feel freer, you must accept yourself as you are.

5. Having a Poor Diet

We know how media, especially television, can have a huge influence on our preferences when it comes to the ideal body type. It has affected us so much that most of us feel anxious when we gain weight so we consume much less food than we should. Anxiety can alter digestion and water intake in our intestine which affects how food is transported through our digestive tract. This leads to poor bowel movement, blood in stools, and even diarrhea.

6. Pleasing Everyone

Many people suffering from anxiety have an inclination to people-please. These people want to be agreeable and likable to everyone they meet — and may feel hurt or worried if other people won’t like them. Sometimes they go to great lengths to sacrifice their own needs, both emotionally and physically. And become anxious and guilty if they let down someone.

7. Trying to Be Perfect

Someone who feels too scared of being rejected, or too worried to say something wrong will always feel anxious. Instead of trying so hard to do well and creating pressure on yourself, give yourself the permission to look bad. Allow yourself to be imperfect. Don’t feel too worried to violate any invisible social rules. It’s not the end of the world if nobody laughed at your joke or if you made an awkward comment.

Closing Thoughts

Fighting anxiety is a tough battle. I should know, I’ve been suffering from it for more than 22 years now. But in all these years, I’ve learned that anxiety isn’t something to be tolerated, it has to be cured. And the only way you can do is it by surrounding yourself with love and friendship from people who matter most to you. So don’t let anxiety ruin your life. Learn to form connections, find peace, and be yourself in any social situation.

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Armela Escalona is a content editor at scoopfed.com. She writes motivational articles about work, health and college life. Stay connected with her through her LinkedIn Account.

You’ve read 7 Things You Should Stop Doing If You Have Anxiety, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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You’re reading The 5 Best Podcasts on Balance, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Putting one foot in front of the other and trying not to fall off a balance beam, requires a similar type of focus that is needed to achieve balance in our work, relationships, health and well being. The key is not view balance as yet another task to check off our wellness list, but to wholly incorporate it in every aspect of our life’s never-ending list of choices. These podcasts stress the importance of discovering the psychological reasons why we need balance in our lives and how this one factor can change our lives permanently, for the better.

1. This unconventional podcast interviews ex minor league baseball player turned design entrepreneur, Ben Jenkins. His ideas posit that when contemplating how to create more balance in the life-work arena, one must never start with all your thoughts and ideas at the table, but instead allow for them to present themselves in the process of achieving balance. To effectively create your life’s aesthetic at your own pace and trust your instincts is at the core of a balanced life-work relationship.

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2. “All the research shows that every decision you make depletes energy from your brain that can be put to better use.’ This quote by Kory Kogon sums up this podcast quite succinctly. We all strive to achieve productivity in our work life, but at what cost? Kory suggests that in order to achieve truly extraordinary productivity there are actions one can take, such a fueling your fire so you don’t burnout (never forget to put yourself and your mental and physical health first), and not being reactionary to urgent things, and instead handling them with focused action.

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3. In this podcast, they concentrate on finding a sustainable action plan for achieving balance in your work life. The advice here is to work by an 80/20% rule. Meaning, you really only attempt to achieve 20% of the most important tasks for that particular month, the releasing of the stress to attain the whole 100% does wonders for us to focus and free out time to be the most productive. Always ask yourself ‘what do I want my lifestyle to look like’, as opposed to ‘how profitable can I be’.

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4. “Even Eagles need a push.” This inspiring podcast interviews single mother, and former homeless, now successful entrepreneur Elayna Hernandez, as she shares her story and her ideas about how to overcome hardships and move forward out of a victim mentality and into a reality of owning your life. She is moved by her purpose of gratitude toward her most cherished gift, her children. Once she began to live in acceptance of her circumstances, she then began to discover balance was about changing her perception of herself and choosing to focus on what she could attain positively, step by step.

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5. This podcast is particularly interesting as it tackles the idea that we take on to much in our lives. In order to find true balance, we must de-clutter our minds and our lives by doing less. There is a feeling in society that if we are not overwhelmed or exhausted, we have no personal value and significance. It is a great myth to think that we can do it all, we are not meant to live with this kind of stress and something will break if you do not choose what to focus on. It’s unrealistic to accommodate all of the commitments life presents you. Be intentional in your actions.

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Gaining more control over our lives by choosing to prioritize our tasks according to what reduces stress, is the most practical way to attain equilibrium. However, this cannot be reached without first discovering what balance means to us personally in terms of our mental and emotional wellbeing. Creating balance can help us live our lives with meaning and purpose, and this is the greatest result of a well balanced life.

Do you read a great blog about balance that’s not on the list? Leave a comment on FB!

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Larissa Gomes is a breast cancer survivor and single mom to her spirited baby boy! Originally from Toronto turned Angeleno, she has worked in roles from writer, actor and producer for well over a decade. In that time, she’s developed concepts, film and television screenplays, short stories, along with freelance articles, blogging and editing work.

You’ve read The 5 Best Podcasts on Balance, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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