“The beauty you see in me is a reflection of you” – Rumi

When I was younger, I often questioned why people did not treat me nicely. I would doubt why they did not communicate with me, even though I was such an interesting and well-versed person.

Probably, I thought, because they are not at my level of education and are just interested in simple things.

Later on, I wondered why men aren’t courting me or showing signs of attention, even though I always acted as a very nice and loving person and tried to always look good. Later, in business, I was also perplexed why clients were not choosing me among others. That is even though I always communicated professionally and did my best to understand their needs.

In situations like these, I was tempted to think that the people around me were wrong, that they did not understand the depth of my nature, the value of my presence or the accuracy of my offers. Though, while such thoughts helped me to feel better, they did not make the people around me nicer.

Until one day, I realized the secret which fixed all the “wrong” people and made them very “right”.

The secret is very simple:

I am responsible for everything that is happening in my life. I am responsible for creating the way other people treat me. And I came to realize that the way I acted in the past, even though it seemed right for me, was not a “winning strategy”. It was simply not the right way!

Here are some of the things that helped me learn how to deal with people.

I thought that being smart was cool

I was always smart and the people around me just didn’t have the opportunity to show they were actually smart, too. The lesson for me was to learn how to be “unsmart” or “foolish”.

I learned to show my vulnerability, ask for advice and reach out for help and support as often as I could. Being able to be smart and unsmart at the same time is such a beautiful combination. It allows me to pour my knowledge when others need it or to empty myself for receiving new knowledge when I need it.

I was always loving

What was I doing wrong by being loving? What could be better and more desired by men than that? Why were men still treating me bad?

For sure, something was wrong with them. At least, that’s what I thought to myself. Mistake!

Intelligence is a lot like love. If you are always full of it, then the people around you wouldn’t have a chance to add to it and this makes them very confused. The real winning strategy here is to be attentive whether the love you give is accepted and well perceived.

If you come to the point when you give so much out of your full heart but you receive no response, then it’s a clear indicator to switch off your flow.

For example, every time you think of sending another love message to your partner, send it to yourself and show love to yourself. Every time you want to suggest something fun and entertaining, suggest it to yourself and do this exclusively for yourself.

Do not be afraid to lose your partners. It is just not possible to not love a person who loves and respects herself/himself. The quality of your partners will go up.

Start with making small experiments with this new strategy. Building up this balance between loving your partner and loving yourself is a jewel addition that can promote self-development. I guarantee you will love the effects.

I was so professional

Why would people not want to work with me? Again, it is not about me being cool, but about how they feel next to me. I realized my strong stand made them feel threatened, low and tightened. I also realized that professional business is not only about the uniqueness and greatness of my product, but about whether people feel comfortable, appreciated, respected, fulfilled and honored next to me.

I learned that maximizing professionalism and maximizing empathy and care go hand in hand.

This is how I approach “inconvenient” people now:

• When someone is too aggressive – I know they want my modesty.
• When someone is too manipulative – I know they need my sincerity.
• If someone is too smart – I know they ask for my appreciation.
• When someone is too stupid – I know they need my faith.
• If someone is too untidy – I know they are thirsty for my inspiration.
• If someone is too depressed – I know they want my naivety.
• When someone is too negative – I know they need my love.
• When someone is too egoistic – I know they ask for my vulnerability.

See Also: How To Develop Empathy By Understanding Subjective Hardship

Conclusion

The bottom line is simple:

I came to realize that those people who seemed nasty or “bad” to me came to my life as teachers.

They taught me things I once considered wrong or inappropriate. However, looking more deeply into the issue, I found some brilliant lessons that helped me learn to love myself as well as others. Those lessons helped me give freedom to others and to set the rules, to know how to let go and to appreciate what I have. I also learned to keep my mind flexible and open.

I understood that when I got irritated about someone, that was exactly the opportunity for me to identify and correct my rigid beliefs. Enlightening these “gray” areas of my mind helped me to gain more clarity about all the situations of my life and to become much happier and reasonable.

When life teaches you through other people, do your best to understand the lessons it presents and work on achieving that perfect balance in your personality. Thank these people for making you more aware, skilled, and happy.

People are not bad. All people are, in fact, good. Each of us is born from a divine sparkle and everyone has some goodness. You just have to know how to deal with people and how to bring out the best in them.

See Also: 12 Stressful Things To Let Go Of If You Want To Live A Calm Life

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It was the longest night of my life — that night while I was trying to recover from injury.

I lay in the hospital bed, incapacitated, motionless and sweating profusely. It was night 5 after a terrible road cycling accident rendered me a quadriplegic. My mind was jumbled with orbiting thoughts of despair, anxiety, sadness and anger. I knew my life was at a crossroads.

Which way was I going to go? Surrender and give in, or fight the good fight and give it everything I had?

Here’s how I was able to recover from injury.

Choose

Nobody chooses to suffer a catastrophic injury. Nobody chooses to be afflicted with some terrible illness or disease. But, we can choose how we respond to such unexpected events.

You can make the choice to aspire, persevere and prevail. Do not look at the rearview mirror and second-guess your choice or wonder if you should turn around. Make the choice to fight the good fight and do whatever it takes for as long as it takes.

Without choice, there is no way forward. You are simply going in circles, going around on a treadmill. You can choose but choice without action will leave you in the same place — stalled.

Apply effort

It will not be easy. Whatever may be ailing you will require action on your part. You have to want it — whatever that choice is — and be willing to push through the forces that will try to hold you back. Be unwavering and commit to working on it every day with faith that you’ll achieve success after all your effort.

I remember in those early days post injury, I had a brief conversation with my physician. He said to me, “Jamie, get independent.” Those are two simple yet incredibly powerful words: get independent.

Find your focus

For the last decade since the injury, those words have guided every step of my recovery. I made it a point to do everything in my power not to be enabled by anyone or anything.

I made it my focus to attempt to do things on my own, as frustrating and painstakingly slow as it was. People always wanted to offer help but I would just thank them and say that I need to figure out how to do things on my own.

I was maniacal in those initial months post-injury to do everything possible with medical interventions of one kind or another. There were many times I would do 6, 10, sometimes 12 appointments a week. This included physical and occupational therapy, pool therapy, acupuncture, reflexology, massage and so much more.

I was under the wrong notion that the bulk of recovery occurs in the first 6 months post-injury and tapers after 1-2 years. I felt this tremendous sense of urgency and didn’t allow myself to rest.

See Also: 9 Immediate Tips To Stay Focused on Your Goals

Pacing

My occupational therapist had said to me early on that there were 4 things I need to remember if I want to recover from injury: plan, prepare, prioritize and pace myself. The most important of them was pacing.

I didn’t listen, at least not initially.

My body was screaming at me to rest, especially in the first year when my body was still in a state of spinal shock. My failure to pace and rest when needed caused a serious “second” crash. I learned a very hard lesson.

Going through a trauma of this magnitude turned my life upside down. Everything was shattered from a professional, familial, marital, relational, financial, recreational and spiritual perspective. My life crumbled. I thought I had the mental fortitude to deal with everything on my plate but quickly learned after the “second” crash that I desperately need mental health counseling.

Seek mental health intervention

It took me a year post-injury before I finally did, which, in retrospect, was a monumental mistake. It nearly cost me my life. I could have easily committed suicide.

Once I did engage with a skilled therapist, I continued with her for the next 5 years. Initially reluctant and impatient, I slowly adjusted to the process and I can say that I have been able to successfully process feelings and emotions deep down in my psyche.

I used to think this was a sign of weakness and it’s not. In fact, it’s a sign of strength, a tacit acknowledgment that it’s best not to go through the process alone.

From the early days when I was in the hospital, I remember just trying to get my forefinger to touch my thumb. Seems pretty pedestrian, except when you are neurologically impaired. My level of injury from the spinal cord injury was C7, which meant that the paralysis started at my mid abdomen and extended all the way down to my toes. It affected all of my fingers.

Working tirelessly just to get the two to touch took weeks. Frustratingly slow, but, eventually, I was able to do it. That little benign, innocuous goal became a little victory.

This put in motion a parade of little goals which turned into little victories. Over time, the goals and victories became additive and cumulative that they grew into bigger goals and victories.

Have goals, constantly

The goals can be of any shape and size you want, but start off modestly. Keep working on them until you can check the boxes and move on to your next set of goals.

Think ahead of the goals you want to set for yourself and do whatever it takes to accomplish them. The victories will come and they will give you the confidence to take on your next targets. In time, you will be amazed at what you are able to do.

I had heard of the words mindfulness and visualization but didn’t understand what they meant or what they could do for me. Through friends and books, I gained a better understanding of them, especially visualization.

I would often visualize, for example, this beam of light emanating from the heavens, shining brightly and aimed at the lesion in my central cord. I pictured it like a laser beam, dissipating the damage like the morning sun burning off morning clouds. A decade later, I still hold on to this vision, particularly in my quiet moments or when I’m stretching after exercise.

Visualize

I have utilized this visualization process, coupled with mindfulness, to make internal movies of things I want to accomplish. I think of myself as a moviemaker, the author, scriptwriter, editor, and publisher of my own movies.

Back then, I would visualize what accomplishing those goals would look like, choreograph them in great detail and play them over and over in my mind until the movie could play itself without any conscious prompting on my part. It has been instrumental in allowing me to make the extraordinary recovery I have achieved since 2007.

I got dealt a very bad hand in this injury and I knew I wasn’t alone. Most people are either dealing with something themselves or know someone who is. I don’t have a monopoly on misery. I am not a victim and don’t feel sorry for myself that something bad happened.

This doesn’t mean there aren’t many more good hands to play. Nobody ever promised life would be fair and, for most of us, that has been the case.

See Also: The Art Of Effective Visualization

Make the best of it

It would be easy to think about all the things I can’t do anymore. So many things used to bring me joy, fulfillment, and identity. I have struggled for years trying to figure out my new purpose.

Why am I still here? What am I supposed to do?

I understand now what my mother-in-law, Muriel, would often say after she was faced with the consequences of an auto accident that caused a traumatic brain injury to her second husband. She would frequently tell me, “Jamie, I make the best of it.”

I understand now what she meant and I’m dedicating myself to doing something I did very little of in my early and mid-adult years. That is to give back.

I remember many years ago when I was seeing a mental health therapist unrelated to this injury. She asked me a number of deeply personal questions.

My answers kept skirting around her questions and she finally quipped, “Jamie, you’re like a greased pig. I can’t seem to nudge you to speak from your heart.” She then asked me, “Do you know what it’s like to be vulnerable?” I didn’t even know what the word meant. It could be that or I had built up such an external armor that wouldn’t allow myself to feel such way.

Be vulnerable

When faced with any kind of trauma, it can be easy to want to hide from others. Being infirmed can be shameful and embarrassing. It can even make us to want to be reclusive.

I believe that if we can shed that veneer and allow ourselves to be real, raw, authentic and even vulnerable, we can draw people closer to us. Being engaged and connected with others can be as important as taking medicines, doing therapies or following doctors’ orders.

After I suffered that terrible “second” crash, I became very fearful. I was very afraid of doing too much that might, in any way, set myself back and negate all the hard-fought progress I had made. I was cautious about everything – working, driving and exercising.

Fear is helpful up to a point. It can guard us against doing things that could be too risky or harmful. Beyond that, fear can also become an impediment or a roadblock that can get in the way of making meaningful progress.

Trust yourself

After 3 years of intensive physical, occupational, and pool therapy, it was suggested that I join a gym and continue rehabbing on my own. I did join a club I belonged to years before and got reacquainted with a friend who was also very knowledgeable about the weight room.

He took me under his wing and trained with me. In the early days of working out together, I said to him, “Sam, when I tell you enough is enough, enough is enough!” He replied, “Jamie, you need to learn to trust yourself!”

He was so right. Fear was in the way of me making further progress in my recovery and his words helped removed that significant barrier.

The work that Sam and I did together in the ensuing years changed everything about my recovery and helped defy the odds in spinal cord injury recovery. After several years, I have been able to ride a road bicycle and get on skis again – all without assistance or accommodation.

I submit that incorporating these 10 methods can help you recover from injury and get your life back together. You just have to realize that it starts with choosing.

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Success is a word that can easily grab one’s attention because it’s important to each and every one of us. No matter what background we come from, we all want to achieve success. We reach for it in our quest to achieve greatness.

Different people have different interpretations of success, but we all expect the same result: to win. If we had to settle on a particular definition, we might say that success is the realization or attainment of a desire or want.

Earl Nightingale, one of the forefathers of self-improvement, defined success as “the progressive realization of a worthy ideal.” Whatever you’re working towards — a college degree, a higher-paying job or improved social status — if you consider the destination to be worthy, then arriving there constitutes success.

There are five important factors to keep in mind when it comes to achieving success. This list is not definitive as there’s always more to add and each individual’s list may vary. Keep these in mind and you won’t go wrong.

Self Image

In his book, Psycho-Cybernetics, Dr. Maxwell Maltz said that an individual’s self-image may be the most important factor in how he or she lives life. Dr. Maltz delves into how our self-image — the image we have of ourselves and how we think others see us — affects our lives.

A reconstructive plastic surgeon, Dr. Matz realized that while plastic surgery only benefited approximately 0.5% of the population and only on a surface level, the other 99.5% had scars that go deeper. These individuals had unresolved and untreated emotional scars stemming from the past.

The way to heal those metaphorical scars is not to go under the knife, but to have those people examine their self-images. Once they are able to treat their inner scars, they will be able to achieve peace of mind.

It’s important to note that self-image goes well beyond what we think of ourselves. What we believe others think of us or the light they see us in play an important role, too.

Self-Esteem

Often confused with self-image, self-esteem is the value that we place on ourselves. Unlike self-image, self-esteem is based on worthiness and not on the actual image that we have in our minds.

The common reason why many people confuse the two is that they’re closely related. In fact, our self-esteem is often derived from our self-image. As Psychology Today states, “Perhaps no other self-help topic has spawned so much advice and so many (often conflicting) theories.”

Whatever value we believe we have or how much we think we are worth constitutes our self-esteem. Stanley J. Gross, Ed.D, a licensed psychologist in private practice, says, “Self-esteem is not set in stone. Raising it is possible, but not easy…self-esteem grows as we face our fears and learn from our experiences.”

Self-Confidence

Self-confidence is exactly what it sounds like. It’s the confidence we have in ourselves and our abilities. It’s the belief that we have in ourselves and what we are capable of.

In 1890, philosopher William James wrote in Principles of Psychology, “Believe what is in the line of your needs, for only by such belief is the need filled…have faith that you can successfully make it, and your feet are nerved to its accomplishment.”

This was James’ way of revealing the virtue of self-confidence. This attribute hinges greatly on the two preceding elements: self-image and self-esteem. How we see ourselves and what we believe our self-worth is will have an incredible impact on how confident we are in ourselves.

Self-Discipline

Self-discipline is an attribute that almost everyone knows is important for success. Unfortunately, it isn’t the easiest to implement.

Self-discipline involves taking action to achieve your desired outcome, even in the face of adversity, temptation or any other obstacle. As Mark Tyrrell says in Uncommon Help, “Exercising self-discipline can make the difference between an averagely talented person doing something amazing with their lives and a naturally talented person realizing very little of their potential.”

Discipline is absolutely vital to your success. Ignoring discipline or trying to find a way around it will only push success further and further away.

See Also: How To Improve Your Self-Discipline

Self-Love

Self-love may sound like something that appeals primarily to narcissists, but it actually refers to how well you treat yourself. How we treat ourselves physically, mentally, emotionally and in any other areas of our lives indicates how much love we have for ourselves.

Writing in Psychology Today, Deborah Khoshaba Psy.D. states that “Self-love is a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support our physical, psychological and spiritual growth. Self-love is dynamic; it grows by actions that mature us.” Self-love is also important in helping us grow as individuals.

Carl R. Rogers, one of the founders of the humanistic approach to psychology, wrote, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” Keeping a healthy diet and associating with successful, productive people are both good examples of self-love.

See Also: Yoga Helps You Love Yourself

The important thing to take away from these five factors for success is that each and everyone revolves around one important element: yourself. It all begins from within. None of these attributes relies solely on external factors. They are all within your control. Gain proper control and understanding of these factors so you can take action and achieve success.

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Admit it.

You’ve identified your most important task (MIT) for the day, grabbed a cup of coffee and sat down to work on it. Ten minutes in and the urge to check your email, send a text and visit news sites kicks in. You do your routine check and get back to your MIT and, after another 10 minutes, you are on your routine check again.

Sounds familiar?

Most people think this is normal and this way of thinking forces them to spend way more time on a task than it actually requires. No wonder why work weeks aren’t 40 hours anymore.

On Focused Attention

The ability to focus for a long time on a single task is diminishing in 21st-century knowledge workers despite it being one of today’s most valuable skills. It’s not something you put on your resume but it’s something you actually use on a daily basis to get stuff done.

I’ve always wondered how come I can complete my tasks well ahead of the other people at work. I noticed that most of them allow all kinds of distractions while working so they end up spending way more time to complete their tasks.

We all know what these distractions are and they aren’t going anywhere soon. So, instead of talking about distractions, we will focus on the solutions to help you get more things done in less time.

Today, I am going to share three powerful strategies that I have implemented and tested in my personal and work life. These are the strategies that taught me how to improve concentration.

Redefine Your Friendship with the Internet

The Internet is the core of all distractions, so let’s start with it.

These days, most of us have social media, emails or instant messaging apps open while working on a task that requires a lot of brainpower.

Most people think they can focus on a cognitively demanding task while surfing the internet and receiving constant notifications. It’s a huge misconception and research has proven it, too.

If you want to improve your focus, you need to look at how you are using the internet. Is it making your life easier or is it distracting you from your most important task (MIT) on most days?

If it’s the source of distractions, then you need to set new terms. This requires three elements.

A. Get notified on your own terms

Don’t let an email message from a coworker or social media notifications ruin your flow.

Turn off notifications from all social sites as well as your email on your smartphone. If you really want to get notified, choose to receive notifications only for emails or messages that are extremely important.

If you can’t turn off all notifications on your phone, at least minimize them. Decide what is important in your life.

B. Acknowledge FOMO (Fear of Missing out)

While working on a task, we all have a tendency to check social media or news sites because we feel like we are missing out on something important if we don’t. Millennials are badly impacted by FOMO and it really disrupts their ability to focus.

Instead of checking social or news sites 633 times during workday, have a couple of times during the day when you can go all in on it. Try it out for a couple days and notice how liberated you’ll feel.

C. Build a cave

If you have an option to work in a separate space, such as in a closed door office or just away from your colleagues, then turn that space into a focus cave for a couple of hours. Here’s how cave environment looks like:

· Tasks to be worked on has been identified already
· No distraction (electric or human) allowed
· Brain music (ex: brain.fm) for focus is on with earphones
· Coffee/Tea is ready to be sipped

Schedule Your Training Sessions

Learning how to improve concentration is like going to the gym to lose weight or build muscles. To improve focus, you need to have training sessions throughout the workweek as well.

The best way to do these training sessions and get stuff done at the same time is to use the good old Pomodoro technique. No one can beat Pomodoro technique when it comes to focusing.

If you aren’t familiar with the Pomodoro technique, here it is in a nutshell:

· Select your MIT.
· Set the timer for a specified time (example 30 min).
· Work on one task for the set time period with no distractions allowed.
· Take a quick break of 5-10 mins and then get back to another session Tip: Take a break away from your

Tip: Take a break away from your workspace.

You can download a Pomodoro timer easily from the internet. I use a tool called Tomighty.

If you can do 4 to 5 sessions of 30 to 45 minutes a day, you can’t even imagine how much stuff you can get done. Beginners find it hard to complete 4-5 sessions, so if you can’t, don’t get discouraged. Just start with 2 or whatever is comfortable for you.

If you are a beginner, you won’t be able for focus for 30 minutes straight on a single task because your brain isn’t used to it yet. Just start with a small number and increment from there.

See Also: Hack the Pomodoro Technique to Boost Your Productivity

Learn to Multitask

So far, hundreds, if not thousands, of research papers have proved that multitasking is bad for the human brain. Am I stupid to recommend multitasking then? No.

Even with all the research and literature proving multitasking is bad, more and more people are getting into it every day. One common complaint people have is that they have so much to do so they have to multitask.

To make a better use of it, learn how to differentiate your tasks. Some of them can be done simultaneously but others require intense focus.

For example, you can easily fill out a status report while chatting with your colleague on an instant messaging tool. On the other side, there are tasks, such as writing software design documentation, that require 100% focus and can’t be done effectively while multitasking.

So, the takeaway here is to look at your list of tasks every day and decide which tasks require intense focus and use Pomodoro technique to go through them.

Pro Tip: Use afternoons for multitasking and morning for tasks that require focus.

Steps On How To Improve Concentration

Here are the step-by-step instructions on how to apply these three strategies to increase your concentration:

1. Before you start anything else at work, look at your tasks and identify those that require 100% focus and which tasks can be completed while multitasking.
2. Select your MIT (most important task).
3. Make sure all notifications are turned off, except highly important ones.
4. Set your Pomodoro timer to your desired working time.
5. Work through that time and resist the urge to give up, browse the internet or check your phone.
6. Once the time is over, take a break for 5 to 10 mins. Step away from your desk and get some fresh air if possible.
7. Return to your desk for another intense session. Continue with your existing task or start a new one.
8. After you are done with your most important tasks, you can continue completing the other tasks on your lists which you can do even while getting interrupted.

Conclusion

It sucks to be late for deadlines or to stay late at work just because you can’t finish your tasks due to all the distractions. However, if you follow the methods outlined above, I can promise you that you can accomplish your tasks in half the time. Now, imagine having extra time for things you love to do because you learned to curb distractions and save time due to improved focus.

What are the common barriers that prevent you from focusing on a single task for more than 30 minutes?

See Also: 4 Habits That Will Improve Your Focus And Destroy Procrastination

 

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According to statistics, about fifty percent of children will experience the pains of divorce before their 18th birthday. Unfortunately, I happened to be among those who made up that statistic.

The common fear of those coming from a broken home is a lack of motivation. Don’t get me wrong. I have learned to retrieve some hardcore business lessons from my broken home that could motivate even those with the faintest of hearts.

To give you an idea, here are five hardcore business lessons that helped me build the successful business I run today. I believe these could be great inspiring factors for you.

The Desire for Independence is An Asset

Most often, the desire for freedom is a primary motivator for entrepreneurship. Having grown up without handouts, I didn’t find it difficult developing an independent mindset. Although it seemed a bitter pill to swallow, it helped prepare me for the entrepreneurial adventure I saw myself in a few years later.

Just like me, make sense out of your desire for independence. See your freedom as an asset for development and not a burden. Your ability to properly utilize this freedom is what will build your foundation.

See Also: Taking Ownership: Are You Taking Full Responsibility For Your Life?

Give Maximum Attention To Customers

While growing, I knew what not being welcomed felt like. I found it better to stay out because I didn’t feel I was treated right most of the time.

This made me realize that if I wanted to satisfy my prospective customers and turn them into repeat client, I needed to treat them like the kings they are. People love attention and will do everything to ensure they get it. In a broken home, I have come to realize that treating people well means directly growing your business.

Treat Your Employees And Customers Well

My first-hand experience of a broken home opened my eyes to the benefit attached to treating people well. One of the biggest mistakes many small businesses make is not treating their employees well.

They wholeheartedly believe in the saying that the customer is the king so they make their employees go out of their way to make customers feel favored. However, what they fail to realize is that, eventually, the overall customer experience is going to depend on how their employees respond to the leadership and the business.

Now, let me tell you a secret. If your employees are treated with dignity, trust, and respect, they will indeed show these things back to your clients. They would treat your customers the way you would, value your business’ goals and may even go the extra mile and make some personal sacrifices for the greater good of the company.

See Also: 6 Benefits of Motivational Training for Employees

Leaving A Great Impression On Your Customers

Growing up with a bad impression and constant depression pushed me to aspire to leave a better impression. This is repeatable in business and unless you have a million dollar marketing budget, word-of-mouth marketing is going to be crucial to the success of your business.

Leaving a great impression may well come down to your ability to get personal with your customers. If you’re the typical salesperson, you may be shown the door in no time.

However, if you take the time to learn their problem, get familiar with who they are and what exactly they are looking for, you would certainly be able to pitch to them in a way that appeals to them.

Hard Work Would Always Have the Upper Hand Over Talent

I used to believe that if you’re talented or are a little more intelligent than the “average entrepreneur” out there, the journey to success may turn out to be an easier one.

But, let me put it without any sugar coating: NOTHING beats hard work!

When you’re an entrepreneur, there’s no shortcut to success, even if you have some unique talent or a higher IQ.

Conclusion

In all situations and circumstances, your ability to reason is what will make you successful. Like me, don’t ever back out and become a chicken wing. Draw out the positives, work hard and relate every instance with your ideal business projection. The truth is anyone can be successful irrespective of the circumstance.

 

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You may have no idea what your reason for being is. You’re annoyed, dissatisfied and unexcited by everything. It’s monotonous, tedious and frustrating.

And if you think you’re alone, think again.

In fact, you’re part of the largest group of people on Earth. You don’t know what to do with your life and, worse, you don’t know how to find out.

People are not born knowing their role in the world. In fact, we’re all born with endless possibilities and therein lies the problem. How do you even begin and, if you begin, how do you choose?

Can you move past the idea that there must be so much more? What are the ways to  move on?

The Future is Yours—You Just Can’t See It

Life has many things in store for you. Family, friends, health, work, society—all of them change considerably during your lifetime. It’s unlikely that you will enjoy all these changes as not all of them will be positive.

Know this: your life’s journey is your masterpiece.

As you work in life, your purpose unfolds in front of you and your role in the world becomes clearer. Stop trying to meticulously plan your life. Planning is the antithesis to the adventure and improvisation that life requires. You’re in charge and that’s a great thing. A little scary maybe, but still a great thing. Remember that the best way to plan your future is to go out and create it!

Your default mode should be action. Doing [things] is honest philosophy. Stay positive and avoid criticizing others. Above all else, avoid negativity. Work to be helpful and try to look for ways to help other people.

At your job, help your boss. In your community, help your neighbors. For the rest of the world, help those less fortunate. Don’t enter the ugly fray that’s become so prevalent in our society. Always be on the side of positivity.

When you approach life this way, people seek you out and opportunities find you. It’s the law of attraction (http://ift.tt/1Rh8yjp).

See Also: 12 Mind-blowing Tips for Increasing Your Overall Positivity!

Don’t Do What Makes You Happy

“Do what makes you happy” is a terrible advice from well-intentioned parents and teachers.

In fact, you should embrace discomforts and frustrations and move beyond your comfort zone. This is the only way to learn. To focus only on that which makes you happy means you avoid a great deal of life and the learning that comes with it.

Every time you move outside of your comfort zone, you learn more. Your role in life and your true happiness become clearer and you have more focus. You find out who you are and everything that you can endure. Each period of great discomfort teaches you about your preferences and that your limits are probably lesser than you imagined. Push your mind and body and then adjust. Do that again and again for that is the journey.

See Also: The Call for Change: Time to Step Out of the Comfort Zone

Investment In Your Mentality

ROI or Return on Investment (http://ift.tt/2cT3YZS) is when you get back what you put in.

You already know about moving beyond your comfort zone – that’s the fun, adventurous part. However, sacrifice is tougher. It is the boring and frustrating part where most people choose to stop.

Note to self: “Don’t stop here.”

You need to understand that there is a long road to travel and that life is a marathon. Chances are you’re just beginning.

Humans are hardwired to want things now. It’s called immediate gratification and it’s a very powerful force. You should be smarter than everyone else, so think! invest in your future and reap your returns as you move forward.

Creating your future most often means sacrificing time with family and friends, working for long stretches in jobs you don’t enjoy (http://ift.tt/2rfsRpg), studying and saving your money. We all have limited time, energy and funds, but you must invest those limited treasures so that you can create a future of greater abundance.

Teach Yourself

Stop waiting to be trained! The truth is that you can’t gain knowledge without seeking it. Nobody can teach you anything anyway. They can only help you learn so understand that going through the process alone is one of the effective ways to move on.

When you don’t know something, read about it, work at it or ask questions. Read about new places, research careers that interest you and speak to people with more experience.

The more you explore, the closer you come to understanding who you are and what you’re supposed to be doing. Don’t be afraid to get your hands dirty because that’s the only way to know if you’re enjoying something. Keep in mind that you are your best mentor.

Big questions that can be helpful:

• What are you most passionate about?
• How can you give back to the world (http://ift.tt/2sdrcxK)?
• What would you prioritize if money and time were no objects?
• Can you speak another language?
• Is travel important to you?
• What professional experience do you want to gain?

Today, hundreds of companies all over the world will allow you to travel, learn and give back while you continue to explore your passions, develop new skills and discover new interests. Start by helping in disaster relief abroad through All Hands Volunteers (https://www.hands.org/), offering your time to provide a better future to the kids in Latin America with Maximo Nivel (http://ift.tt/2kXdo86) or help orphaned and abandoned children in Africa and Asia through (http://ift.tt/2fFsNGT). Your role in the world and your preferences continue to evolve over time, so continue teaching yourself and keep learning!

There Is No Right Time

Time waits for no one, so utilize the time you’ve been gifted. As much as possible, avoid falling trap to time wasters, like TV, social media, people who don’t like you and being negative. Instead, try reading, traveling and being with the people who like you.

Your path in life and your role in the world are only discovered as you work at it. So, work hard! A lot of people miss the idea of fulfillment and happiness because opportunity always looks like hard work.

Instead of thinking that way, engage your mind and body in creating your life’s journey. It won’t be easy and it won’t be perfect. That’s completely fine as it’s not supposed to be.

Thinking about it, waiting, being nervous or scared—these are all personal choices. If you want to move out of a rut, move beyond those choices. You will never regret your adventures if you’re learning new things.

 

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Are you an Instagram user or an Instagram star?

Frankly, becoming an Instagram star from a regular user can be an arduous journey and, unfortunately, 90% of users don’t make it successfully.

Instagram is the holy grail of online social media marketing right now. In fact, this 2017, almost all brands across the globe already have their Instagram profiles and channels.

If you are sitting there and scratching your head, it is obvious you must have fallen off the radar at some point about five years ago.

Let us get you updated:

1. Instagram has over 500 million active users per month.
2. Instagram users share about 95 million photos and videos every day.
3. They like 4.2 billion posts per day.
4. By end 2017, almost 70.7% of all US brands will be on Instagram.
5. 96% of US fashion labels are on Instagram.
6. 60% of all brands use a consistent (signature) filter.
7. 75% of Instagrammers visit the related website after checking out a post from their feed.
8. One hashtag contributes to 12.6% more engagement at an average.
9. 33% of Instagram users purchase products after seeing featured ads on their feed.
10. 50% of Instagram users become social networkers for the brands they follow. This has increased average engagement per post to 416% since 2015.

These are just a few stats showing that Instagram is the present and the future of digital marketing. If you want your brand to be successful and famous, you need to take advantage of this free platform.

To get started, here’s a list of the top 5 Instagram tools every aspiring brand should have.

Instagram Insights

This tool is ubiquitous to every business account holder’s repertoire. The Instagram Insights can provide you with the basic statistics you can use in assessing your market.

You’ll be able to see the performance of your posts as well as the changes you have made to your Instagram account. You can check your weekly updates, including post reach, website clicks and profile views, too. This one also shows the range of your 24-hour Instagram stories.

Simply Measured

Simply Measured is a free report-generating tool for Instagram users. This is ideal for those who have an Instagram business account.

This is one of the few Instagram tools that can handle up to 25,000 followers free. You can check what has worked and what has fallen through in the last few weeks of your Instagramming.

Just log in to authorize the Simply Measured tool to pull information from your account. Follow Simply Measured on Twitter for a free analytics report that will tell you all you need to know about charts, scorecards and appendix.

Like4Like

This social marketing tool can get you real likes on your Instagram account. This is very necessary if you are a newbie who wants to launch a successful brand.

Like4Like can teach you how to treat your account as a brand in itself. You can get free likes and influential followers who can bring you more business from all corners of the world.

The Pro version of this tool is ideal for entrepreneurs who want to benefit from the company of social influencers and Instagram celebrities.

See Also: How to Increase Your Instagram Followers in 2017

Keyhole

This unique Instagram tool allows you to track data from public Instagram accounts. Keyhole analyzes follower growth and engagement of Instagram accounts to get complete data on your marketing campaigns.

It will give you small pieces of advice, including best times to post and best filters for business accounts on a daily basis. It collects real-time data to track hashtag trends. The tool also collects traditional metrics that can give you an idea of the evolution of related search terms on this social platform. It can include impressions, sentiment, activity volume, reach and associated phrases of the trending search terms.

Having Keyhole in tow is like having a personal advisor who has complete knowledge of all Instagram strategies.

Brandwatch

This is a platform that can help you manage your Instagram account in real-time. You can research the market strategies and weigh your target audience using the Brandwatch tool. This is quite the marketing analytics tool of the future.

The Brandwatch can alert you when a follower or potential customer posts about your brand. It can monitor your reputation by listening in on social conversations. This tool offers the most efficient methods of spam filtration and reiterative mentions. It can track demographic data, gender-based data, occupation and the interest of your followers. This powerful tool will help you conquer a broad potential market present on Instagram.

Conclusion

Only opening a profile and keeping it active on social media platforms, like Instagram, is not enough to ensure marketing success. You need working marketing strategies and plans to move forward. If you do not see much profit from your social media marketing efforts, it is time you adopt one or more of these Instagram tools. They address very specific issues of social media, especially Instagram marketing, that brands often face today.

Many of the tools mentioned here are free. The paid and pro versions have more options and accessibility. However, if you do not have a budget for new investments, you should start with the Instagram Insight tool. This gives you a brilliant, real-time and complete view of your account and post activities.

It is possible for your brand to garner millions of followers on Instagram. Sometimes, you might just need a little push.

See Also: 5 Smart Ways to Boost Brand Awareness

 

The post 5 Instagram Tools That Can Boost Brand Performance appeared first on Dumb Little Man.

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Thanks to today’s technology, there are now countless job search apps that can greatly improve your job hunting experience.  They make the process really convenient. You can look for a job whenever and wherever you are. Plus, you can get instant access to job postings and be aware of all the recent announcements.

The trick, however, is in finding the best mobile applications. If you are unsure where to begin, here are the most popular job search apps you can choose from.

LinkedIn Job Search

Everyone knows that LinkedIn is the number one tool for job searching and, fortunately, it also has a mobile version. Its application resembles the website a lot. It makes it possible to log in with your existing account which makes it quite easy to use.

The service allows you to search for open vacancies. Depending on the industry, salary, location and date, you can apply directly through the app. You can also receive new job suggestions and notifications about the activity of your network.

See Also: 3 Surprising Tips That Will Transform Your Job Search Approach

Jobr

Have you ever used Tinder? Then, you will not have any difficulties with Jobr as it functions in a similar way. All you need to do is to “swipe right” to apply for a job or to “swipe left” to pass the posting. It makes the job search faster and a lot more fun.

There is also an option to save a job posting so you can check the details later. Before starting the job search, make sure to create a profile and import your resume.

Glassdoor

Glassdoor is an app that allows you to take a look at your chosen company from the inside. It provides the information about your potential recruiter based on the feedback of other employees. You have a chance to learn about the pay, work environment and your possible seniors before you actually apply for the job.

Another great feature is the “Know Your Worth” tool that offers an analysis of your career, development and value on the job market. Glassdoor also has a section for frequently asked questions you should be aware of during the interview.

Rake

Rake is your personal organizer of your job search process. You can use it the traditional way to search for career opportunities or as an additional tool to improve your job search.

With the help of Rake, you can sort the jobs you saved from other sites and job search apps into categories. An organized search guarantees that you will not miss new opportunities or details. Unfortunately, the app is only available for iOS.

Indeed

Indeed Job Search is a basic app available for all job seekers. This easy app does not offer any special features, but it is well-developed for its main purpose.

A wide choice of vacancies and numerous search filters will help you find your desired job opportunity. It also offers a list of resumes that can help you in creating your own. You can apply instantly or make a reminder to do it later. The company reviews and photos are also available in its app.

Career Builder

Career Builder is good for someone who likes straightforward and simple job search apps without any add-ons. You do not have to create a profile; just import your resume and start the search.

This app will allow you to keep track of your application history. You can check the job instantly or save it for later. You will get a notification once your application is delivered and when it is viewed.

Workpop

Workpop is an app that makes job search fun, enjoyable and entertaining. Your personality is the main focus when finding a job through this app.

There are a lot of ways to express yourself there. It can be through profile photos, captivating bios, and short video presentations. This app is focused on perceiving a candidate as a real person and not just a list of achievements and experiences. The service deletes all the job posting older than two weeks which ensures that most offers are valid and fresh.

See Also: How To Make Your Job Search More Productive

 

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If you have been frequently waking up with back pains and a bad mood, it’s probably your mattress to blame.

In general, we spend as much as a third of our lives in bed so it’s only right that we invest in the right mattress. It should be able to give you both comfort and support so your spine, ligaments and muscles can relax during the only time your body gets to relax.

So, should you get a new mattress? Check out these telltale signs:

• If your mattress is already sagging, it’s high time you give it a rest. Over time, springs can break down, fibers can wear out and foams can get softer. These things can mean lack of support to your most vulnerable parts.
• The presence of lumps can mean uneven density and this can lead to uncomfortable pressure points.
• Ideally, you should replace your mattress every 7 to 10 years. If yours is more than that, you’re compromising your sleep.
• The presence of more pains and aches than you had before you went to bed is a clear sign you already need a replacement.
• Most mattresses can accumulate allergens, particularly mold, dust mites and mildew. If you find yourself sneezing whenever you get close to your bed, consider assessing your mattress.

See Also: 10 Things You Never Knew About Bed Bugs

What Is The Best Mattress?

The best mattress is the one that will work best for your body type. As your body has its own contours and needs, you have to know exactly what your options are. There several types of mattresses you can choose from.

Here are some of them:

Memory Foam

The memory foam, particularly the visco elastic foam, is conceptualized by NASA scientists. It’s patterned from the material that was supposed to absorb the effects of G forces during the take-off process.

Compared with other mattresses, this one is special in that it follows the contour of the sleeper’s body. It helps distribute weight to eliminate pressure points. This makes memory foam great for those who suffer from back problems and other body aches.

There are different formulations when it comes to memory foams. There’s the standard memory foam that is temperature sensitive. There’s also the plant-based memory foam which is more breathable and has a faster response. The last type is the gel-infused type which is commonly marketed as a cooler.

Latex Mattress

Latex mattresses are more expensive than other types because of their materials. Despite the cost, this type has one of the simplest constructions. They are highly durable and can last for over 15 years. They feature low-pressure support and can contour to your body’s shape without the heat or chemical odors. latex mattress provide great bounce, responsiveness and cooling, too.

Waterbed

Waterbeds can provide average pain relief. They are designed to mimic conventional beds but with low heat and odor complaints.

There are two main types of waterbeds: the hard-sided and soft-sided. Both feature a water chamber which can either be waveless or free flow.

Airbed

Airbeds are nothing like the ones you use for camping. This type comes with an adjustable air chamber which works as its support system. The good thing about airbeds is that you can adjust their firmness according to your body’s needs.

Specialty foam mattress

This type is a bit unique in that it uses one or more types of foams. It can either be latex, polyurethane, memory or gel. Specialty foam mattresses come in different densities and shapes to ensure you get both comfort and support. If you are wondering what specialty foam mattresses look like, check out this two in one mattress.

How To Choose A Mattress Properly

Know how old your mattress is

In general, if your mattress is already 8 years old or older, you should consider getting a new one. Take note that this doesn’t apply to all types of mattresses since there are some that can extend beyond that time.

If you are unsure about how long your mattress type should last, you should decide based on your sleeping patterns. If you’re restless or you find yourself frequently waking up in the middle of the night, just go buy a new one.

Determine what type of mattress you’ll need

The type of mattress you’ll need will depend on your preference, body type and sleeping positions. Consider the following:

• If you sleep your side, you’ll need a mattress with lots of pressure relief. It should be able to support your body weight and conform to the shape of your body.
• If you are a stomach sleeper, choose a mattress with a firm top surface. It’s the best one for support.
• In case you like sleeping on your back, invest in a mattress that can provide support while keeping your spine in its proper alignment.
• If you tend to toss and turn at night, go for an innerspring mattress with latex, memory foam or pocketed coils. These materials are great for isolating motions, like when you don’t want to disturb your partner with your movements.
• If you like a lot of the features of the different mattresses and can’t make up your mind, pick a hybrid style mattress. This type can provide the motion isolation feature of memory foams and the buoyancy of a mattress with an innerspring core.
• For allergies, stick with mattresses that are resistant to dust mites and molds. Pick foam and latex since they have inherent antimicrobial properties. If you choose an innerspring mattress, you can enclose it in an allergen-resistant cover to make sure you don’t wake up sneezing at night.

See Also: Have a Child with Skin Sensitivities? Here’s How to Deal with it

Set your budget

Mattresses don’t go cheap, particularly those in the luxury end of the market. The good thing is that there are lots of options now that will enable you to find the right mattress at the right price.

In choosing, keep in mind that expensive doesn’t always have to mean better, but don’t go ultra cheap, too. Since the quality of your sleep will depend on your bed, make sure you don’t skimp on your mattress.

 

The post Do You Have The Right Mattress For Your Body Type? appeared first on Dumb Little Man.

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