3 Easy Tips For Massive Personal Growth

If you’re like most people, you probably have a few aspects of your life that you’d like to improve. When you think of all the changes you want to make, you might feel a bit overwhelmed. Maybe you want to start exercising regularly, eat healthier food, develop better relationships, and improve your financial situation. Thinking about all of these goals can be quite daunting! Each improvement on its own would be a big change and require a lot of effort, so how can you possibly improve them all at the same time? Fortunately, you don’t have to. You only need one small improvement to start building the momentum required to make massive changes in your life.

1) Personal growth is compounding

When you’re solving a jigsaw puzzle, how do you solve it? Do you try getting all the pieces in place at the same time? Of course not! You start with one piece at a time, and each one makes adding the next piece a little easier until you complete the puzzle. You need to think of your own personal growth in the same way. Each small change builds on the last and makes the next change even easier. The more changes you make, the more confidence you build and soon enough, you’re a totally different person. You’re no longer overwhelmed by your goals because you’ve experienced your own ability to achieve them. You know that when you make a decision, you follow through, because that’s what you need to do if you want to achieve your goals.

Start with the low hanging fruit. Find something small in your life that you can improve without a massive amount of time or effort, and commit to making it happen today. Maybe that means cleaning your house or going to the gym. The scale doesn’t matter as much as the completion. Most people are so overwhelmed by their collective goals that they don’t even start, but even the smallest changes can snowball into a new mindset that allows you to make more changes with less effort.

2) Train yourself to think like a winner

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by all the changes you want to make, there’s one simple reason: You haven’t trained yourself to think correctly about personal growth. You probably haven’t experienced enough self driven positive change to remember that success is just a state of mind. If you spend every evening binge watching Netflix and eating unhealthy food, you might be training yourself to be lazy.

Every time you have the thought “I should start going to the gym” but instead just keep watching Netflix, you’re actually conditioning yourself to believe that you’re powerless. You have admitted to yourself that you want something, but don’t have the conviction to follow through with it. You’re putting that attainable goal on a pedestal and turning it into a pipe dream. Conversely, every time you commit to something and follow through with it, you are training yourself to have confidence. Even the smallest commitment and follow through can be the spark that ignites your engine of growth.

3) Push through the initial pain

Starting something new can be difficult, but most things get much easier after you push through the initial pain. Speaking from personal experience, I can tell you that in the last six months I went from barely exercising at all and totally dreading the gym to working out 4+ days a week with very little effort. In fact, it requires almost zero mental energy to get myself to the gym now, because I’ve learned to associate it with all the pleasure of exercising instead of the pain. The first two months were tough because I wasn’t used to exerting that much energy and being sore, but then it completely changed. I had broken through the initial pain and I became excited to go, considering it a treat to my body and my mind.

Right now, in this moment, make a small commitment and follow through with it. Make a solid plan so you can’t just reason your way out of it. Book an appointment, book a class, call a friend and arrange a time to go to the gym together. Better yet, start right now. In this moment, you can make a decision to become the type of person who lives the life they want, and that change happens instantly when you truly commit to it.


Pat Kelly is a self improvement writer and host of The Pat Kelly Podcast and Youtube Channel. Find more content like this at www.patkellypodcast.com

You’ve read 3 Easy Tips For Massive Personal Growth, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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3 Essential Tips to Spring Clean Your Mind

You’re reading 3 Essential Tips to Spring Clean Your Mind, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Spring is nature’s way of saying, ‘Let’s party!’ – Robin Williams

It’s spring cleaning time. Another year, another spring, and another chance to get your sanity back. If you, like me, don’t like winter, or if the past few months have been tough on you then no time is better than spring to help you recharge and shake things up for the better.

Here are four science-backed ways to spring clear your mind and feel more relaxed before the summer.

Tip#1: Expose your negative thoughts for what they truly are

Ever listened to Rap God? Eminem raps the last verse of the song at an insane speed that not so many will comprehend it properly without checking the lyrics first. Similarly, this is how your deeply-integrated fears, worries, and negative thoughts operate inside your mind – probably 10X faster.

You see a hot somebody walking towards you and all the sudden you`re scared shitless. Suddenly, all the insecurities and failed experiences with the opposite sex pop up out of nowhere. You don`t know what had occurred to you, but you`re so damn sure you`re not feeling confident around that person.

Your only way out of this dilemma is to put those thoughts under the microscope and examine their validity. But you can`t do this unless you journal these thoughts on paper so you can analyze them slowly and with better understanding.

Many studies recommend daily journaling for better mental health. One study found that four weekly sessions of journaling – 20 minutes each – helped American veterans cope with their post-war lives.

Another study by Michigan State University found that writing about your feelings makes you less worried and may help you perform better in an upcoming stressful task. If all these studies suggest you should keep a journal, then it might be a good idea to try it. After all, what`s bad about getting to know yourself better.

 Tip#2: Meditate like your life depends on it (Cause it does)

Life is so stressing and anxiety-provoking, and if you have a bad temper, that`s even worse. I used to be a very short-tempered person. Not the typical short-tempered man but more of the take no shit from nobody, can`t stand a critic type.

Everyone around me told me I should meditate, or see a doctor, but I didn`t. Until I lost my temper one day in front of a big fish who didn`t like my attitude – well, who blames him – and I lost a dream, five-figure a month client.

The first thing I did back home that night was open the Word file where I keep my journal, scripted down the entire situation then wrote to myself this line: That`s Why You Should F*ckin Meditate. And I vowed I would meditate every morning for the rest of my life.

I`m cool now, all from ten minutes of just sitting down there and watching myself breathing in and out. And I recommend you do the same cause meditation rocks.

Daily meditation will ease stress, enhance your self-awareness, increase your attention span, lower any depressive symptoms, improve your sleep, and will give you a better mood. So why not try it? Use this detailed meditation guide. No matter how busy you are, you`ll always have five spare minutes to do whatever you want. Make them count.

Tip#3: Run, Forrest, Run!

Months ago, I had a surgery and the doctor told me not to do high-intensity workouts for a while. If I was to exercise, I had to either choose between brisk walking and light jogging, so I reluctantly chose the latter and yes, it changed my life.

Though I couldn`t burn as many calories as I used to with high-intensity training, I began to cherish the pep talk Will Smith once gave on MTV. What Smith said on live TV was that running is the best way to overcome the inner voice within you that begs you to jump ship when the going gets tough– he precisely called running the key to life, why?

Because when you – and I`m quoting Smith – learn how to defeat that voice when you`re running, you`ll learn how not to quit when things get hard in your life. You teach yourself how to concentrate and how to tunnel your vision, breath, and power to the single goal of getting one step closer to the finish line.

I highly encourage that you run around the block, or at the gym, at least once a week. Don`t do it for the six packs. There`s a bunch of other activities to lose weight faster, but not so many that will teach you how to control your mind and stay mentally sharp.

Marwan Jamal is a fitness and health blogger at Healthline and a great fan of the gym and a healthy diet. He follows the trends in fitness, the gym, and a healthy life. He loves to share his knowledge through useful and informative articles.

You’ve read 3 Essential Tips to Spring Clean Your Mind, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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3 Essential Tips to Spring Clean Your Mind

You’re reading 3 Essential Tips to Spring Clean Your Mind, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Spring is nature’s way of saying, ‘Let’s party!’ – Robin Williams

It’s spring cleaning time. Another year, another spring, and another chance to get your sanity back. If you, like me, don’t like winter, or if the past few months have been tough on you then no time is better than spring to help you recharge and shake things up for the better.

Here are four science-backed ways to spring clear your mind and feel more relaxed before the summer.

Tip#1: Expose your negative thoughts for what they truly are

Ever listened to Rap God? Eminem raps the last verse of the song at an insane speed that not so many will comprehend it properly without checking the lyrics first. Similarly, this is how your deeply-integrated fears, worries, and negative thoughts operate inside your mind – probably 10X faster.

You see a hot somebody walking towards you and all the sudden you`re scared shitless. Suddenly, all the insecurities and failed experiences with the opposite sex pop up out of nowhere. You don`t know what had occurred to you, but you`re so damn sure you`re not feeling confident around that person.

Your only way out of this dilemma is to put those thoughts under the microscope and examine their validity. But you can`t do this unless you journal these thoughts on paper so you can analyze them slowly and with better understanding.

Many studies recommend daily journaling for better mental health. One study found that four weekly sessions of journaling – 20 minutes each – helped American veterans cope with their post-war lives.

Another study by Michigan State University found that writing about your feelings makes you less worried and may help you perform better in an upcoming stressful task. If all these studies suggest you should keep a journal, then it might be a good idea to try it. After all, what`s bad about getting to know yourself better.

 Tip#2: Meditate like your life depends on it (Cause it does)

Life is so stressing and anxiety-provoking, and if you have a bad temper, that`s even worse. I used to be a very short-tempered person. Not the typical short-tempered man but more of the take no shit from nobody, can`t stand a critic type.

Everyone around me told me I should meditate, or see a doctor, but I didn`t. Until I lost my temper one day in front of a big fish who didn`t like my attitude – well, who blames him – and I lost a dream, five-figure a month client.

The first thing I did back home that night was open the Word file where I keep my journal, scripted down the entire situation then wrote to myself this line: That`s Why You Should F*ckin Meditate. And I vowed I would meditate every morning for the rest of my life.

I`m cool now, all from ten minutes of just sitting down there and watching myself breathing in and out. And I recommend you do the same cause meditation rocks.

Daily meditation will ease stress, enhance your self-awareness, increase your attention span, lower any depressive symptoms, improve your sleep, and will give you a better mood. So why not try it? Use this detailed meditation guide. No matter how busy you are, you`ll always have five spare minutes to do whatever you want. Make them count.

Tip#3: Run, Forrest, Run!

Months ago, I had a surgery and the doctor told me not to do high-intensity workouts for a while. If I was to exercise, I had to either choose between brisk walking and light jogging, so I reluctantly chose the latter and yes, it changed my life.

Though I couldn`t burn as many calories as I used to with high-intensity training, I began to cherish the pep talk Will Smith once gave on MTV. What Smith said on live TV was that running is the best way to overcome the inner voice within you that begs you to jump ship when the going gets tough– he precisely called running the key to life, why?

Because when you – and I`m quoting Smith – learn how to defeat that voice when you`re running, you`ll learn how not to quit when things get hard in your life. You teach yourself how to concentrate and how to tunnel your vision, breath, and power to the single goal of getting one step closer to the finish line.

I highly encourage that you run around the block, or at the gym, at least once a week. Don`t do it for the six packs. There`s a bunch of other activities to lose weight faster, but not so many that will teach you how to control your mind and stay mentally sharp.

Marwan Jamal is a fitness and health blogger at Healthline and a great fan of the gym and a healthy diet. He follows the trends in fitness, the gym, and a healthy life. He loves to share his knowledge through useful and informative articles.

You’ve read 3 Essential Tips to Spring Clean Your Mind, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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7 Scientific Ways to Be More Productive

Be More Productive

I’m not talking about brain surgery or some advice you’d forget after reading, but rather about what actually works.

Let’s be honest. You can empty your wallet purchasing all personal development books, go to conferences, soak up all the advice you get, and yet not feel like you’re using your time effectively.

In fact, you won’t achieve the expected results even if you had 30 hours in a day, or if you knew all kinds of ‘secret sauces’ to working better and priorities decided.

To be clear, being productive is all about dealing with your own stuff, sticking to discipline, and practising until you get better. We all know it in our hearts, after all.

Yet, certain ways work

Even though all sorts of ‘hacks and tricks’ start feeling useless after a
while, certain tips really help, and they stick to you as you inculcate them in your life.

Your work pattern, habits, or skills go hand in hand – and if you can
establish a proper balance between them, you can nail what you do. You’d simplify your life.

Here are seven ways to be more productive

Most of these theories are tried and tested, and found to be useful when it comes to improving the productivity of individuals, regardless of any external circumstances they’re dealing with.

1. Pareto Principle

“The Pareto principle states that, for many events, roughly 80% of the effects come from 20% of the causes.”

Everything you do can be divided into two categories:

1. Important
2. Unimportant

The important part brings outcomes, and the other part is the ineffective one.

Dedicate more of your time to the tasks which are responsible for the
results. As Pareto stated, focusing on the 20% alone can do miracles for
you.

Translation: Focus on tasks that are responsible for outcomes.

2. Pomodoro Technique

“The Pomodoro Technique is a time management method technique which uses a timer to break down work into intervals, traditionally 25 minutes in length, separated by short breaks.”

If inconsistency is your problem – pomodoro technique might bring you
back on the track.

According to the pomodoro technique, we are more productive when we
take small breaks between the whole duration of our tasks, compared to
when we do them continuously.

A single pomodoro requires you to work approximately between 15-25
minutes, followed by a 3-5 minute break.

One pomodoro cycle consists of 4 such pomodoros, after which you may
take a long 15 minute break and start with a new cycle again.

However, using the pomodoro technique isn’t the most effective solution as you might get side-tracked easily if you aren’t serious about using it. Try it only if you’re determined about using it as it requires firm
discipline.

Translation: Don’t slog, take breaks, and you’d automatically work better.

3. Hawthorne Effect

“The Hawthorne effect is a psychological phenomenon that produces an improvement in human behaviour or performance as a result of increased attention from others.”

We are all somehow concerned about how we’re perceived. Our mind
works subconsciously – it cares about social reputation and respect all
the time.

Although the Hawthorne effect is environment-oriented (which means
that it works based on how others treat you), you may direct it to
yourself.

For example, when you think about starting a new project but no one
knows about it, then you might not use up your complete potential. But telling your acquaintances about your project can impel them to ask you about your progress, making you self-conscious.

If you are a social person and other’s attention doesn’t trouble you, use
the Hawthorne effect to your advantage.

Translation: Use the expectations of people to motivate yourself.

4. Zeigarnik Effect

“We remember better that which is unfinished or incomplete.”

You know the feeling you get when you leave something incomplete,
right? The one that makes you roam around confusedly.

That feeling doesn’t stop poking your brain, and keeps you restless until
you finish the incomplete task or accomplish your objective.

You can use that feeling to be more productive – by initiating your long
awaited tasks.

If there’s something you want to do but you aren’t doing it, then starting
that task is the best thing you can do.

After that, the task will take over your head, it’ll remind you of itself,
occupy your thoughts, and stay there until you finish it.

If you’re worried about procrastination, start somewhere – Zeigarnik
effect will do rest of the work for you.

Translation: Leave things incomplete and do other tasks, as you’ll do both eventually.

5. Expectancy Theory

“It proposes that people are motivated by their conscious expectations of what will happen if they do certain things, and are more productive when they believe their expectations will be realized.”

We’re motivated by outcomes and work more effectively under better
prospects.

If you were paid 10,000$ for a job instead of 1000$ a month, you’d work
better, won’t you? That’s how our expectations rule our minds.

When you’re working, raise your expectations for yourself, think of the
possible benefits which you’ll have, and visualize the rewards which you
work for.

However, don’t let those reward be the sole purpose of your work as you
might get disappointed when your work fails to meet your expectations.

If possible, keep your motivation-triggers emotional rather than material. Use your goals to push yourself forward, but don’t be a slave to them.

Translation: Think of the outcomes and why they matter to you – you’d
automatically work better.

6. Parkinson’s Law

“Work expands to fill the time allotted for its completion.”

When you’re given more time than necessary to complete a task, you
intentionally take more than usual – this is what the Parkinson’s Law
states.

Suppose you can create a graphic within 20 minutes, but you’re asked to get it done within an hour. Then chances are you’ll spend rest of the 40 minutes scrolling through Facebook, and drinking coffee, sidelining the main task.

You slow down.

Things get worse when you have some personal goals to accomplish,
because then you’re not obligated, and hence take things more loosely.

So here are two quick ways to encounter this problem:

1. Keep a pile of tasks queued.
2. Assign only sufficient time a task, but nothing more.

Give a task the time it deserves, nothing more. What remains will be yours to use productively.

An example of Parkinson’s Law are exams. You take enough time at start, but in the end, when you realize that time is less, you rush faster and get stuff done within minutes.

Translation: Decrease the time required to do a task and try completing it within that duration.

7. Hofstadter Law

“It always takes longer than you expect, even when you take into account Hofstadter’s Law.”

One common mistake most people make is approximating the required
time to do something. They never get it right. No one does.

It happens to all of us – this is the reason why deadlines are postponed,
professionals fail to ship products on time, and also why our lives are
often messed up.

If reading this post is taking longer than you had expected, then it’s just
Hofstadter’s law at work.

The only solution to this problem is to first think about the time which a
certain task needs, and then extend it up to 1.75 times or so. It works, in most cases.

The next time you predict how long a certain work might take, increase the time to have a reliable conclusion.

Another similar term is planning fallacy, which is as follows: “The planning fallacy is the tendency of individuals to underestimate the duration that is needed to complete most tasks.”

Translation: Have realistic expectations, otherwise you’ll be disappointed and lose your motivation.

Were these tips helpful?

I hope you remember at least one of the suggested ideas – because there aren’t any real hacks, but some ideas that last.

What works for you, simply works for you. So find out what makes you
work harder and better.

About Author

I’m Vishal Ostwal – a writer, blogger, and the kind of person whose name rhymes with his surname.

Subscribe to my blog to get all new articles and my recent book, ‘Pocket Productivity’ straight into your inbox.

You’ve read 7 Scientific Ways to Be More Productive, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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4 Great Ways to Look and Feel Amazing for the Upcoming Holidays

New Look

Whether you celebrate Thanksgiving, Chanukah, or Xmas, the major holidays (including New Year’s) is only months away. This is the time of year when friends and family come together to celebrate in their own special way, and it is also the time when people want to look and feel their best.  Whether you want to look stunning for that big New Year’s Eve party or feel good about yourself over the holidays with a great optimistic outlook on 2018, here are four things you can do to achieve these goals.

Book Regular Appointments with a Skin Care Spa

Your face is the first thing you notice about yourself, and it is generally the first thing others notice about people. Whether you want to reduce red spots, wrinkles under the eyes, or lines on your forehead, the best skin care spas have well-trained aestheticians who customize treatments to help clients achieve their beauty goals. You could be a great candidate for scheduled custom facials, microdermabrasion treatments, or you may even have other goals to improve your appearance that extend beyond the face, in which non-surgical body contouring treatments would be ideal.  From New York City to Dallas and to Los Angeles, find a boutique skin care spa and let your aesthetician know what goals you hope to reach by the time the family is ready to carve the turkey and exchange gifts!

Work with a Life Coach

Looking great is one thing, but truly feeling amazing takes happiness to a whole new level. Often we experience a disconnect with our true desires whether we find ourselves buried in careers or too busy raising a family to focus on ourselves. When people disconnect with their authentic selves, the opportunities to live a full life of joy can be hindered. This is why many choose to work with a life coach specializing in various areas and who they can connect with. When we learn to connect with ourselves, we will be able to better connect with others, and with this comes a new level of living and happiness that will open your awareness to taking in all the joy during the holidays.

Get a New Look

Sometimes we tend to get stuck in a fad whether it’s the way we dress or how we style our hair. Start by visiting a respected hair stylist who has attended the latest conventions and is current on what the “in look” is, and where it’s headed. You can also book time with a style consultant to help you shop for a new wardrobe. These are skilled experts who know how to dress people based on their skin tone, body shape, hair color, and facial structure. A new wardrobe for Fall and Winter, some new sunglasses, striking accessories, and the latest hairstyle will bring out your natural beauty leaving you looking, and feeling, totally amazing.

Consider a Tattoo

It may sound crazy, but times are changing. Today’s business executives are no longer a majority who wear suits and ties. There are more professionals coming from creative agencies and tech companies that sports sandals, torn t-shirts, and custom ink. While some have entire sleeves of ink running up their arms, others have a single tattoo in a noticeable place, yet it is subtle. Tattoos aren’t for everyone, and you should always be 100% sure you want one once you sit down in the artist’s chair. But if you have considered it, check with your employer and see how your industry as a whole views people with tattoos. While a sales executive a pharmaceutical company might be able to have one and not have it impact their business, a pediatric surgeon may get a few raised eyebrows. So long as it is appropriate for you and doesn’t interfere with your career goals, a tattoo could give you a new look leaving you feel energized and more alive than ever!

You’ve read 4 Great Ways to Look and Feel Amazing for the Upcoming Holidays, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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The Key To Success Might Just Be Joy

 

“Passion” is a buzz-word right now. Wherever you look, there’s another guru telling you how you need to be passionate about everything you do. The pursuit of passion is so relentless, it can make you feel exhausted just thinking about it.

However, when there’s a lot of hype around something, there’s usually a reason. I’m far from telling you that you need to feel passionate 24/7 or else you fail at life, but I am telling you to take a good look at the amount of joy and passion present in your days. They might just be the key to a lot more things than you ever suspected.

What’s a “passion”, anyway?

The way I define “passion” is not just as a hobby, but something which truly light you up. Your passion is that thing you could do all day, that makes you forget time. You feel inspired, pumped, or simply very, very content.

It could be an art or craft. For some, their passion is a particular interest they love pursuing. And there are many people who have more than one passion. The world has spent a long time telling us that we need to find our “purpose”, which is typically defined as one particular activity or career we find fulfilling. This is true for some, but not for everyone. A lot of us are multi-passionate, or multi-potentialites, meaning that we have different interests which light us up, and they may change over the years.

But I want success/money!

When I talk about passions, it’s easy to get agreement from people. Everybody wants to follow their passions, don’t they? It’s self explanatory.

The reason I get worked up about this, is that most people see passions as something of an afterthought. They have their work or business, which is ideally related to a passion, but it’s a serious undertaking and it has to come first. Passions are relegated to the 30 minutes on a Sunday evening when the “real” work is done.

And that, right there, is the issue. People focus on “making a living” – or a fortune, even – and neglect what living is actually all about: Joy, passion, love, and the moments that stay with you.

Centre or periphery?

You may well argue that you still need to pay the bills, and a business can make you feel fulfilled, too. Indeed, I’m not for one moment suggesting that you give up on the practicalities of life in favour of your passion or passions. My point is about focus.

You see, something happens when we realise that joy, passion, the expansive feeling of doing exactly what we love most, are really what life is all about. If we start putting our main focus on our passions, a shift happens. It’s like our DNA changes, like every cell in our bodies rearranges itself in a new, lighter, joyful pattern.

This doesn’t crowd out necessities like paying bills; on the contrary, once we have our priorities right, time seems to expand and “busy” becomes a thing of the past. I see it time and time again with my Coaching clients.

The highest form of Self Care

The truth is that catering to our passions, putting them front and centre in our lives, is the ultimate act of Self Care. It leads to our filling up with joy and love, to the point where we overflow and this love seeps into everything else we do, until it permeates every area of our lives.

Yes, this does include careers and businesses, especially if we love what we do. It can, however, infuse even the most menial work with a new sense of meaning and purpose. I know, I know – “purpose” is another of these over-used words, but the truth is that it’s directly related to your passions. When you follow your bliss quite literally, you will discover your purpose.

Ever since I made the shift to passions-centered living, my life purpose has become abundantly clear. As a result, every day has become meaningful. I no longer live for the weekend. And every time I stop to think about my life, I’m immediately flooded with a deep, heartfelt gratitude, a feeling so profound it occasionally moves me to tears.

Almost as good as experiencing this profound joy, is witnessing it in others. It’s why I’m a Life Coach! I can think of no greater privilege than to be around a fully realised human being, and having a hand in bringing this about is the best job I can think of.

Remember what used to make you happy. Think of the thing you always wanted to try. When will now be the right time to pursue them? Dare it, and watch your life unfold.


Sibylle is a joy-seeker and professional Life Coach at http://www.wildspiritscoaching.com who helps clients break out of the tyranny of “work, pay bills, buy things and consume” and instead prioritise doing what lights them up. She lives in the beautiful West of Ireland.

You’ve read The Key To Success Might Just Be Joy, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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The Power of Goal Setting (and Accomplishing)

The Power of Being a Goal Setter (and Accomplisher)

Success. For many success is viewed as something esoteric and elusive. Its seen as something meant for a selective few who are more exceptional than the rest of us. They seem to have some type of knowledge or gift the rest of us can’t replicate or at least comprehend.

I’m here to tell you that when it comes to obtaining that level of success you’ve always dreamed of whether it be losing weight, getting that promotion at work or even to start a business that is thriving its more possible than you think.

The Magic of Setting Goals and Accomplishing Them

If there is one common lesson I’ve learned from all of the seminars, books, interviews and other content on the subject of success, its that success in not more or less being lucky or having tons of talent. Success by many definitions is more of a system than anything else. A well thought out system of first figuring out what you want and where you want to be. Then you calculate exactly what it will take to get there. Next you implement a system of small or sometimes big goals that will surely take you in the right direction. Setting goals in themselves is not what stops people from getting where they want to be in life. Usually its that they are not accomplishing them.

I would say one of the biggest killer of success is that most people can’t find something and stick with it for an extended period of time. Most try something for a week or two then simply say it didn’t work then give up. For me personally I always had so many great ideas that sounded good to me. I would start one thing, try it for a few weeks than move on to something else not realizing why I kept failing at everything I tried. It wasn’t till I stuck with a project for more than a month that I began to see some significant growth. Success in its essence means you have to be willing to give something your all even if you don’t see an immediate reward or instant return. For many this is something they just cannot pass. Our society has conditioned us for constant stimulation and for people to be always looking for that next dopamine rush. Rather this be from checking your likes on Instagram or constantly checking your email. You must be able to see the bigger picture and know that right now you see no instant gratification for your work but that one day you will be able to relish the fruits of your labor.

Setting your goals give you a real road map to where you want to go. When you plan out your next move and actually stick to it, your mind is not left wondering “So what do I do now?” your mind has a focus point for all your energy to be projected towards.

When you give your mind that focal point, ideas will just come from seemingly nowhere. Your brain will constantly be working on ways of improving or innovating what ever the focus is on. In turn what is your brain doing when you’re not focusing on a particular goal? It has no focus so its everywhere else giving energy to a lot of things that don’t really matter at all. Would you drive across country with no map or gps and still expect to reach your destination in time? I highly doubt you would so don’t do that with your life and career. The only significant edge some people have over others is that some plan for the future while other sit around and always say one day I’ll get to that thing I want to do. We all know someday usually doesn’t happen. Like the great Malcolm X said, “The future belongs to those who prepare for it today.” Be the one who prepares.

Concluding Thoughts:

Success can be summed up to creating a system of goals that you first create, then follow through on and accomplish them. Set your goals up and stick to them, allowing the momentum of accomplishing your goals push you to do even greater work. Find your one focus point and make sure you tend to it faithfully for no less than 6 months before you even think of giving up on it. Success will and can be yours, you just have to set yourself up for it.

 


Darnell Stallworth is the founder of http://azerojourney.com/ blog. An intersection between Mindset Motivation, Self-Improvement, Weight Loss and just becoming your best version possible.

 

You’ve read The Power of Goal Setting (and Accomplishing), originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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Here’s Why You Really Feel Invisible

 

Here's Why You Really Feel Invisible

“The common denominator I found in every single interview is we want to be validated. We want to be understood.” –Oprah Winfrey

Your stories—how you look at money, your interpersonal relationships with other people and your belief system—could be the reason why you feel invisible and unheard. Learning the complex relationship between each will help you to become more aware about why you feel invisible. This is the first step towards being seen and being more present in the world.

The Money Story

When you were growing up and wanted new clothes or new toys, did your parents ever say to you, “I have no money”?

Or whenever you wanted to buy something, did they say, “Why would you buy that!” with the subtext that you’re really just wasting money?

Perhaps even when you bought your own things, they still asked, “How much was that?” like they had to pay for it themselves.

I grew up hearing all of these things and more.

When you dig deeper, there’s often more to the story than just money. For example, when they asked, “How much was that?” your parents thought they were doing good by teaching you not to waste of money.

But they were actually doing a greater harm. Whether they knew it or not, they were really making you feel guilty and shameful about trying new things. The superficial result is you became guilty about spending money.

Overtime, it became easier to use money as an excuse on why you’re not taking chances and taking advantage of new opportunities. To be seen fully in this world as our truest selves often means taking chances.

The Other Part of the Story

“You’re a nobody. You’re worthless!” These were the stories my grandmother would frequently tell me.

“You’re so stupid. What are we ever going to do with you?” was another common one.

And I believed her.

Alongside these criticisms, I was constantly incurring the wrath of my grandfather. He hated me and would constantly berate me, especially around the dinner table. This happened the entire time I was eating. The mental abuse was so great that I would have acid reflux disease for the first 30+ years of my life, until I finally drew the connection that meal times were stressful times.

I would try to be invisible so as to avoid his wrath, but it never worked. The more I tried to stay out of his way, the angrier he seemed to get with me.

But my habit of staying invisible became an unconscious part of me. I also felt invisible whenever I went shopping. It didn’t matter if I was at the clothes store, car dealer, or at a restaurant waiting to be served. A lot of times, it just seemed like the staff was ignoring me.

I didn’t like being treated like I was a nobody, especially if I was going to spend money there. Yet, I kept wondering why this was happening over and over.

Connecting the Dots…

Here’s the real kicker: Are you invisible because of your money beliefs, meaning that because you grew up with nothing, you felt like you were nothing, especially because you had nothing?

Or was it more because of how your parents and grandparents treated you? For example, did they say you were useless, a nobody, and will never amount to anything?

All this typically translates to needing to feel invisible in order to continually validate those stories!

Eventually, I realized I was hiding, both from my grandfather and from the sales people because growing up, I was nothing and had nothing. So, why would anyone think it was worthwhile to talk to me?

The Upside

Being treated like you’re invisible is a welcoming contrast and can also bring good things into your life. But only if you decide it is, then do the work.

It has helped me to become more assertive (not aggressive…there’s a difference!). Being assertive increases your self-esteem and your self-image.

You can only grow as far as the image you hold of yourself.

This in turn increases your self-confidence, helping you to go after what you want. After all, one of the determinants of feeling invisible is the lack of confidence. We fear that what we do and say do not matter to other people.

For another, you learn how to ask. Many people are afraid of asking because they are afraid of the answer “no”. On average, you learn that it takes several noes to get to yes. For instance, there was the time I was rejected three times before the hotel would finally honor a price-match guarantee. But it was worth my while because I saved over 40%! Had I not worked on myself and improved my self-confidence, I would have given up after the first rejection.

Being empathetic, you also learn to treat everyone you meet with more compassion and respect.

Most importantly, as you start examining why you feel invisible you will discover why you have been feeling certain things and holding certain memories your entire life. These are recurrent themes in our lives. Playing it safe is a major reason most people tip-toe from the cradle to the grave, hoping to make it safely in one piece. Is there anything sadder than this?


Benson Wong is the Money Freedom Guy. Having achieved financial freedom, he’s interested in serving others so that they may also achieve financial freedom themselves. If you want to learn more, Get Your Free eBook, Align With the Energy of Money.

You’ve read Here’s Why You Really Feel Invisible, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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5 Ways to Become More Present Everyday

5 Ways to Become More Present Everyday

In a world full of distractions, it’s become increasingly important to learn how to detach ourselves from all the surrounding “buzz” and become more present. In fact, we owe it to ourselves to pause once in awhile and take in all that life has to offer.

Do you ever find yourself sitting down to write an email, and then you get a sudden urge to check your Facebook? Scrolling your newsfeed turns into browsing YouTube videos and before you know it, an hour has passed until you finally realize you still haven’t written that email.

We live in such a fast paced world and with all the noise that surrounds us, it’s become quite difficult to stay present.

Most of us are aware of the benefits of paying attention to the world around us. However, when it comes to putting it into practice we don’t know where to begin. If you’re looking for stress reduction, increased productivity, higher quality relationships, and more happiness here are five ways to live in the moment.

Breathe

Stopping to breathe, even for a few moments, allows you to check in with yourself and tap into your intuition. The more you can harness your intuition the more conscious you will become allowing yourself to make clearer decisions. Your breathing is also always in the present moment.

Limit notifications

Technology is an excellent tool when used properly, but it easily becomes distracting. Make it a priority to determine which notifications are important and turn off the rest. An overwhelmed mind is not a present mind.

Step away from the noise

Limiting your notifications is the perfect first step, but imagine yourself away from your devices for an hour. If you’re a millennial like me this might be hard to imagine, but just think for a second, our parents and their parents never had all of these distractions.

Once you get past the need to know what’s going on in everyone else’s life, you allow yourself to focus on what’s going on in yours.

Go outside

When is the last time you really went outside? I’m not talking about walking to and from your car when you leave the office. Think back to your younger years.

Do you remember that sense of joy you felt as a child running your fingers through a patch of grass? Or the feelings of happiness when you tried to make shapes out of clouds. It’s no surprise that connecting with nature can increase your happiness.

Focus on the details

We get so caught up in our response that sometimes we fail to listen. Whether it’s a conversation with a loved one or listening to the birds chirping while sipping your morning coffee focus on the intricacies each situation offers.

The beauty of being present is that when we’re focused on the now, our fears disappear, we can ignore outside distractions, and we make decisions that are based off of what we care about the most.

After overcoming a medical trauma, Gary has been inspiring others to overcome their challenges. For more inspiration and to learn more about his story, visit laughatadversity.com

You’ve read 5 Ways to Become More Present Everyday, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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7 Life-Changing Habits to Get More Done in a Day

Life is a nonstop race with no breaks—or brakes. Your to-do list always seems full, and finding time to relax can be difficult. The following seven habits can alleviate some of that busyness and help you accomplish more in your day.

At Work

Work is often the place where you need to get the most done—and you can with the right steps and tools.

  1. Organization

Organization can make or break your productivity, so it’s important to stay on top of it. Physical and digital clutter prevent you from getting things done. Use filing cabinets, hanging folders, and digital folders to make your desk and computer more organized. Often, taking twenty minutes one day a month to get everything in order can save you hours of scavenger hunting in the future.

  1. Technology

Utilizing the latest technology can help you with almost every aspect of your job. Artificial intelligence is making headlines, and having an AI powered assistant such as Alexa or Google Home can help keep you organized.

  1. High-Quality Internet

Having high-quality internet at work helps you get more done in your day, but if you aren’t able to get a high-speed connection, you can take a few steps to increase your current speed. For example, limiting the number of tabs in your browser can give you higher speeds, as can controlling the number of browser windows you have open. Keeping windows and tab numbers down can also prevent feeling overwhelmed while you work.

At Home

You want to enjoy your time at home, and these tips can help you do so.

  1. Hydration

Drink more water. It seems pretty simple—and it is. Staying hydrated keeps your mind and body sharp as you accomplish your daily tasks. Many health authorities recommend you drink a minimum of 64 ounces a day.

  1. Meal Prep

Meal prep takes a little more time initially, but it saves you time in the end. Many make-ahead recipes are good for the wallet, the clock, and your peace of mind.

  1. Meditation

Mediation is one of the best habits you can add to your routine. Becoming more conscious of your surroundings and improving your awareness boosts your self-confidence and your productivity throughout the week.

  1. Fitness

Maintaining your physical health also helps you feel ready for whatever the day throws at you. Working out activates your endorphins and puts your mind and body in a super focused—and happy—mode so you feel motivated to get more done each day.

As you implement these easy tips into your life, you find more success during the day and more time to enjoy yourself and the other people in your life. Do you have any tried-and-true methods for accomplishing more? Share your tips below.

You’ve read 7 Life-Changing Habits to Get More Done in a Day, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

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