Author: signordal
It’s Time To Find Your Unconventional Workout
I grew up a thin waif of a blond child. A hamburger or two would have done me some good but luckily, I was raised in a family of vegetarians- mindful and meditative vegetarians (read: no hamburgers).
I ate tofu and genuinely liked it. I played guitar and remember almost none of it. And I talked about my feelings all the time.
I did not, however, play sports. I did not work out or go out for “the team.”
Years later, after my second daughter was born, I was shocked to realize that I didn’t instantly lose the post-baby bulge. I also realized that wishing it away won’t work. I knew I needed to be a little more proactive if I want to get the body I’ll be happy with.
My husband and I often talked about joining the local gym but couldn’t justify the cost.
When we finally decided to enroll, I made sure that we were getting the most out of our gym membership. So, I started checking out the other group classes the gym offered. I loved yoga but my husband was quick to point out that “a little bit of cardio couldn’t hurt either.”
That’s when I discovered Body Jam.
The class was held at the perfect time of day –immediately after work. Because of that, I didn’t have to go home right away. It was actually good because trying to convince myself to leave my babies and my comfy couch to workout was not going to happen.
20-somethings who live in active wear
When I got to my first class, I took one look at the promo posters and was certain it would not be a good fit. I expected a group of fit, young people who had a huge budget for fashionable workout clothes.
Thankfully, the reality turned out to be the opposite. There wasn’t a 20-year-old in sight!
There were a handful of middle-aged mothers and a handful of in-shape retirees. Everyone was female, except for one gentleman who seemed to be a regular and exceptionally comfortable in the room.
The instructors turned off the overhead fluorescents and flipped on the cheap DJ lights. They cranked up the music -an incredible mix of hip-hop, reggae, and Latin I never knew I’d loved.
And then we danced.
By the end of the hour, every muscle in my body hurt and my mind was exhausted from the mildly complicated choreography. Despite that, I was relaxed and smiling.
Now, nearly four years later, I still go every week.
When I miss a class because of my kids’ schedules or when they get sick, my body is genuinely sad and I cannot wait to go back. Turns out this unconventional workout wasn’t so weird after all.
What’s your unconventional workout?
You’ll never know where you might end up fitting in. You’ll never know what you might be good at and you’ll never know where you might meet new friends.
You don’t have to do CrossFit and you don’t have to train for a 10K. You don’t even have to force yourself to play basketball.
But you should do something.
There are so many unconventional exercises out there. You just need to get out and move! No knee jarring, back tweaking, or muscle pulling required.
The post It’s Time To Find Your Unconventional Workout appeared first on Dumb Little Man.
Disarming the Weapons of Mass Distraction
Attention is a limited resource: to pay attention to one thing requires us to withdraw it from others. But in today’s pervasive digital culture, technologies are transforming our patterns of attention, pursuing “those slivers of our unharvested awareness,” as Tim Wu puts it. Digital technology has thus provided consumer capitalism with its most powerful tools yet. Given current political anxieties about social mobility and inequality, how do we foster this most crucial and basic skill: sustaining attention?
Here’s Why You Really Feel Invisible
“The common denominator I found in every single interview is we want to be validated. We want to be understood.” –Oprah Winfrey
Your stories—how you look at money, your interpersonal relationships with other people and your belief system—could be the reason why you feel invisible and unheard. Learning the complex relationship between each will help you to become more aware about why you feel invisible. This is the first step towards being seen and being more present in the world.
The Money Story
When you were growing up and wanted new clothes or new toys, did your parents ever say to you, “I have no money”?
Or whenever you wanted to buy something, did they say, “Why would you buy that!” with the subtext that you’re really just wasting money?
Perhaps even when you bought your own things, they still asked, “How much was that?” like they had to pay for it themselves.
I grew up hearing all of these things and more.
When you dig deeper, there’s often more to the story than just money. For example, when they asked, “How much was that?” your parents thought they were doing good by teaching you not to waste of money.
But they were actually doing a greater harm. Whether they knew it or not, they were really making you feel guilty and shameful about trying new things. The superficial result is you became guilty about spending money.
Overtime, it became easier to use money as an excuse on why you’re not taking chances and taking advantage of new opportunities. To be seen fully in this world as our truest selves often means taking chances.
The Other Part of the Story
“You’re a nobody. You’re worthless!” These were the stories my grandmother would frequently tell me.
“You’re so stupid. What are we ever going to do with you?” was another common one.
And I believed her.
Alongside these criticisms, I was constantly incurring the wrath of my grandfather. He hated me and would constantly berate me, especially around the dinner table. This happened the entire time I was eating. The mental abuse was so great that I would have acid reflux disease for the first 30+ years of my life, until I finally drew the connection that meal times were stressful times.
I would try to be invisible so as to avoid his wrath, but it never worked. The more I tried to stay out of his way, the angrier he seemed to get with me.
But my habit of staying invisible became an unconscious part of me. I also felt invisible whenever I went shopping. It didn’t matter if I was at the clothes store, car dealer, or at a restaurant waiting to be served. A lot of times, it just seemed like the staff was ignoring me.
I didn’t like being treated like I was a nobody, especially if I was going to spend money there. Yet, I kept wondering why this was happening over and over.
Connecting the Dots…
Here’s the real kicker: Are you invisible because of your money beliefs, meaning that because you grew up with nothing, you felt like you were nothing, especially because you had nothing?
Or was it more because of how your parents and grandparents treated you? For example, did they say you were useless, a nobody, and will never amount to anything?
All this typically translates to needing to feel invisible in order to continually validate those stories!
Eventually, I realized I was hiding, both from my grandfather and from the sales people because growing up, I was nothing and had nothing. So, why would anyone think it was worthwhile to talk to me?
The Upside
Being treated like you’re invisible is a welcoming contrast and can also bring good things into your life. But only if you decide it is, then do the work.
It has helped me to become more assertive (not aggressive…there’s a difference!). Being assertive increases your self-esteem and your self-image.
You can only grow as far as the image you hold of yourself.
This in turn increases your self-confidence, helping you to go after what you want. After all, one of the determinants of feeling invisible is the lack of confidence. We fear that what we do and say do not matter to other people.
For another, you learn how to ask. Many people are afraid of asking because they are afraid of the answer “no”. On average, you learn that it takes several noes to get to yes. For instance, there was the time I was rejected three times before the hotel would finally honor a price-match guarantee. But it was worth my while because I saved over 40%! Had I not worked on myself and improved my self-confidence, I would have given up after the first rejection.
Being empathetic, you also learn to treat everyone you meet with more compassion and respect.
Most importantly, as you start examining why you feel invisible you will discover why you have been feeling certain things and holding certain memories your entire life. These are recurrent themes in our lives. Playing it safe is a major reason most people tip-toe from the cradle to the grave, hoping to make it safely in one piece. Is there anything sadder than this?
Benson Wong is the Money Freedom Guy. Having achieved financial freedom, he’s interested in serving others so that they may also achieve financial freedom themselves. If you want to learn more, Get Your Free eBook, Align With the Energy of Money.
You’ve read Here’s Why You Really Feel Invisible, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.
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Stephen Hawking IQ: Physicist Called People Who Boast About Score ‘Losers’
Renowned physicist has died at the age of 76.
via Stephen Hawking IQ: Physicist Called People Who Boast About Score ‘Losers’ — Newsweek
Today marks the 115th anniversary of the creation of the first at Pelican Island in…
Today marks the 115th anniversary of the creation of the first national wildlife refuge at Pelican Island in Florida and the birth of the national wildlife refuge system. From Maine Coastal Islands National Wildlife Refuge on the Atlantic to Midway Atoll National Wildlife Refuge in the Pacific, over 550 wildlife refuges – many of them close to urban centers – protect an incredible array of wildlife and landscapes. Find a refuge near you. Photo of Back Bay National Wildlife Refuge in Virginia by Heather Bautista (www.sharetheexperience.org).
How much money you actually take home from a $75,000 salary…
The B&N Podcast: Brad Meltzer
Every author has a story beyond the one that they put down on paper. The Barnes & Noble Podcast goes between the lines with today’s most interesting writers, exploring what inspires them, what confounds them, and what they were thinking when they wrote the books we’re talking about.
When you read a Brad Meltzer novel, the author tells us, he not looking to give readers a passive experience. The author of twelve bestselling thrillers is playing a game with you, and he’s going to give you just enough clues to make sure you know he’s playing fair. But make no mistake: he’s playing to win. Brad Meltzer joins us on this episode to talk about Houdini, history, misdirection, and the hero who inspired his latest, The Escape Artist — and, yes, his award-winning work in the world of comics, too.
Who is Nola Brown? Nola is a mystery. Nola is trouble. And Nola is supposed to be dead.
Her body was found on a plane that mysteriously fell from the sky as it left a secret military base in the Alaskan wilderness. Her commanding officer verifies she’s dead. The US government confirms it. But Jim “Zig” Zigarowski has just found out the truth: Nola is still alive. And on the run.
Zig works at Dover Air Force Base, helping put to rest the bodies of those who die on top-secret missions. Nola was a childhood friend of Zig’s daughter and someone who once saved his daughter’s life. So when Zig realizes Nola is still alive, he’s determined to find her. Yet as Zig digs into Nola’s past, he learns that trouble follows Nola everywhere she goes.
Nola is the US Army’s artist-in-residence-a painter and trained soldier who rushes into battle, making art from war’s aftermath and sharing observations about today’s wars that would otherwise go overlooked. On her last mission, Nola saw something nobody was supposed to see, earning her an enemy unlike any other, one who will do whatever it takes to keep Nola quiet.
Together, Nola and Zig will either reveal a sleight of hand being played at the highest levels of power or die trying to uncover the US Army’s most mysterious secret-a centuries-old conspiracy that traces back through history to the greatest escape artist of all: Harry Houdini.
Discover more fiction by Brad Meltzer.
Like this podcast? Subscribe on iTunes or Stitcher to discover intriguing new conversations every week.
Author photo of Brad Meltzer (c) TK.
The post The B&N Podcast: Brad Meltzer appeared first on The Barnes & Noble Review.
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Chairman Xi, Chinese Idol
I was skeptical at first when political analysts suggested that Xi might try to rule past a second term. One reason was that the Chinese political class has fought hard to institutionalize transfers of power. I wondered if Xi would want to risk alienating so many of his peers by taking such a step. Another risk is that this puts Xi in the crosshairs if his policies fail. And while it’s easy to imagine Xi steamrolling opponents until his health fails him, there are small signs of unease among people in China.
6 Things You Can Do To Avoid Midlife Crisis
If you are entering the mid-years of your life, you’re probably wondering about midlife crisis. After all, it seems pretty common.
Midlife crisis can happen to anyone at anytime. Some people experience it early while others struggle with it in the late stages of their lives.
Now, although common, it doesn’t mean that there’s no way for you to avoid it. Check out the tips below to help you stave off or mitigate a midlife crisis.
Believe that it’s never too late
A lot of people who are in their mid-life years panic when they start to take inventory of the things they wanted to do but never made time for. They feel that it’s too late to make them happen now.
It really isn’t.
You still have time to write a book, climb a mountain, travel the world or learn to do that thing you always wanted to. It may seem a little tough when those around you are younger. However, if you really want to avoid having a crisis, you need to accept that if you really want to do it, your age shouldn’t stop you.
Evaluate your priorities
Priorities change over time and for good reasons. It is okay to let go of some dreams and expectations if they no longer appeal to you. You haven’t sold yourself short if you find saving for retirement is more important to you than buying a Porsche.
Accepting that priorities change is important and healthy. Doing so will keep you grounded as you move into the new phases of your life.
Stop waiting for things
Now is the time to do something.
That doesn’t mean you need to be extravagant or do something really bold. It simply means that once you identify what you want or what you want to do, make a plan and get it done.
Putting things on hold or constantly waiting for things to happen can leave you feeling unfulfilled and more anxious.
A word of caution:
Doing the things you want and getting what you want out of life is important, but it needs to be done responsibly. Seek advice as needed so that your choices are good ones.
Deal with your regrets
We all have regrets. It is nearly impossible to get through life without wishing you had or had not done certain things. Take the time to get over them.
Take whatever rational measures that may help– apologize, reconnect and then let them go. Moving on does not make you a bad person.
Cultivate friendships now
If you don’t have a good circle of friends yet, then it’s time to make one.
The worst part of midlife crisis is when people feel like they have no one to turn to.
Friends give you a support system, a sounding board, and the happiness of companionship. Never underestimate the power of friendship.
Get or stay in shape
Never underestimate the power of health and exercise.
There is no need to explain the benefits of exercise to your body but you may not realize how important exercise is to your mind. Regular exercise keeps your mind sharp and helps to alleviate stress.
Depending on your preferred exercise, it can also provide an avenue for new friendships and achievements.
See Also: 19 Ways to Get Motivated to Exercise
In Conclusion
The second half of your life doesn’t have to be scary, depressing or full of crisis.
Understanding that life has its ups and downs and being prepared for them is important. If you feel like you are headed down the path toward midlife crisis, take a moment to stop and take stock of what you are feeling and why.
Use the tips above to get you through the process. If you don’t feel like you can get back on the right path, seek the help of a professional counselor.
For some people, a midlife crisis can be very complicated. It is possible that you may need help to get through it –a lot of people do.
The post 6 Things You Can Do To Avoid Midlife Crisis appeared first on Dumb Little Man.
Sig Nordal 